#system masking

[thefluxsystem]

being a fictive from a problematic source sucks because it’s like oh! okay! i’ll bury this aspect of myself and never speak about it again i guess! fantastic! i love doing that!

[moonjay-the-forest-spirit]

Masking as the host so much you even do it when you're alone. Trapped in a body that's not yours pretending to be somebody you're not and slowly losing what little sense of self you have left.

[blackboxtheatrecrew]

"No fear one fear" meme but it's us fearing that people think "Haze" is our host when we present as "Haze" in system spaces, when in reality it's just the default system mask.tm we use since we are often blurry and/or just don't feel like having people know who specifically is fronting all the time.

People remember that singletsonas exist, but don't always exist in a literal sense in-system challenge level impossible /nbh

🎭Blurry/Anon🎭

[moonjay-the-forest-spirit]

I wish the other alters could fully express themselves while fronting. I want them to dress how they want, do what they want, speak how they want, not have to mask and pretend to be someone else. I want everyone to make themselves as comfortable as they possibly can be in this body.

But every time I switch back out after someone else has fronted I worry, what did they do? What did they say? What will people think of me now?

Juniper went to a party and enjoyed herself. Good for them. I fucking hate parties, they're too loud, too crowded and I hate the flashing lights I usually have to leave early and everyone can see I'm not having a good time. But now they saw "me" actually enjoying a party, smiling and dancing and stayed from start to finish. Will they think I'm fake that all that anxiety from before was just an act?

They'll probably think "oh good for them, they finally got past all that anxiety and can now cope just fine at parties" but I'm not and I don't. There's gonna be new expectations on me that I just can't meet and part of me wishes Juniper never went to that party and had so much fun. And I feel horrible for thinking that.

I'm might just be overthinking but oh well.