#tim needs sleep

[ktkat99]

Tim, falling asleep at the dinner table

Jason- Finally. I was wondering when those sedatives would kick in

Dick- Wait, you sedated Tim??

Jason- The kid hasn't slept in like four days. What did you expect me to do, ask nice?

Dick- I sedated him, too.

Damian- And me

Steph- Same. He needed sleep

Dick, panicking- Alright, anyone who slipped Tim something today raise your hand

Everyone raises their hand

Dick-...

Dick-... Well, fuck

Dick-... Tim, put your hand down

[batfam-stuff-posts-0]

Jason: I'm having a debate with Tim while he hasn't slept in a week ever again.

Jason: He literally started his argument with 'Riddle me this.'

[ultra-pidge]

Jason, just back from a mission, walks in on Tim typing away while facing the backsides of two monitors Jason: Tim: Jason: What are you doing? Tim, no sleep in at least 72 hours: I'm a backend developer.

[cardinalcheerio]

Tim doing something tim esque (fucking idiotic at best)

Tim: I'm thinking outside of the box!

Bruce: OUTSIDE THE BOX OF SANITY?!?

[tiredofitallbutthegothamway]

Wayne Enterprises Internal Memo – Emergency Meeting Transcript Date: [REDACTED] Time: 03:47 AM (Because why would an emergency meeting happen at a reasonable time?) Location: Batcave Conference Room Attendees: Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Damian Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Oracle (remotely) Special Guest: Dr. Misaki Eto

BEGIN TRANSCRIPT

Dr. Misaki Eto: [sipping tea, visibly unimpressed] Alright. Who called an emergency meeting at three in the morningbecause of a social media issue?

Tim Drake: [dead inside, holding an energy drink] It’s an engagement emergency. Nobody is commenting on the therapy post.

Jason Todd: [leaning back, arms crossed] Right. And this required DEFCON 1?

Dick Grayson: [soft gasp] Of course, it does! No comments means no interaction, no interaction means the algorithm buries it, and that means—

Barbara Gordon (Oracle): —less reach, fewer shares, and ultimately, fewer people seeing it.

Bruce Wayne: [clears throat] I fail to see how this is our problem.

Tim Drake: [snaps up to look at him, eyes wild] You don’t understand. It’s never happened before. The Batfam gets comments. The Therapy Series gets comments. Where are the people? Have they been kidnapped? Are they avoiding it? Are we shadowbanned?!

Damian Wayne: [arms crossed, unimpressed] Tt. You are all pathetic. It is an internet post. Who cares?

Dick Grayson: [gasps louder] Damian! It’s about engagement!

Dr. Misaki Eto: [raises hand] Okay, real talk—did anyone check if the site is down?

Tim Drake: [furiously typing] I did. Tumblr is fine. Engagement on other posts is normal.

Jason Todd: [grinning] Maybe they’re just afraid to comment after reading what you wrote. Y’know, intimidated.

Barbara Gordon: [thoughtful] That actually might be a thing. If it was an especially intense post, people might just likeit but not know what to say.

Dick Grayson: [dramatic sigh] We should’ve baited them with a “reblog if you relate.” Rookie mistake.

Bruce Wayne: [pinching the bridge of his nose] So what do you suggest we do?

Dr. Misaki Eto: [shrugs] Well, normally, I’d say just keep posting and it’ll pick up traction again. But since we’re clearly operating in full Bat-level paranoia mode, we could also just—

Tim Drake: —Stage a social experiment?

Jason Todd: —Threaten them?

Barbara Gordon: —Do a follow-up post?

Dick Grayson: —Make a meme about it?

Dr. Misaki Eto: …You know what? Do all of those. See what works.

Bruce Wayne: [deep sigh] I am far too tired for this.

Damian Wayne: [muttering] You are all disgraceful.

Tim Drake: [typing furiously] Okay, operation revive engagement is a go. Give it 24 hours. If nothing changes—

Dr. Misaki Eto: —Then what? Another emergency meeting?

Tim Drake: …Obviously.

Jason Todd: [laughs] Oh, this is gonna be fun.

END TRANSCRIPT

Next Steps:

Tim: Experiment with different post formats to boost engagement.

Dick: Meme the situation.

Jason: Threaten the algorithm within legal parameters.

Barbara: Monitor post analytics.

Dr. Misaki Eto: Continue questioning why she agreed to this in the first place.

[annastylepie]

The Butlers apprentice AU

Dc x Dp au 1. uwu

ok so like Alfred is like Dannys Great Grandpa or something I really don't care tbh.

At a Family reunion Alfred raising and beeing surrounded by detectives quickly picks up that Danny when close to his parents seems uncomfortable especially when they talk about ghosts and the manece Phantom. As the reunion goes on he notices that danny at times would seem to walk a little too silent to be normal. Upon asking Danny about his oppinion on Phantom out of his parents ear shot he praises the hero and states that he is nothing like his parents make him seem etc. etc.

Some time later when danny is around 17, maybe at a different reunion or even the same Alfred wittneses Danny transform and is explained by him and Jazz the situation. Danny procedes to vent about wanting to move out but not wanting to leave family so Alfred procceds to offer him a room at the manor. Danny is hesistent on taking the offer at first. But after a too close call with the GIW and his perents as well as encouragement from Jazz and his friends he gives and goes to live in the menor under the condition, that he doesn't want to just mooch of of his great Grandpa. So he starts his Butler apprenticeship in the Wayne Manor, where he procedes to learn how to properly cook without the food coming to life, keep up in housework and everything a butler needs to know.

The best part Danny seems incredibly efficient within an hour he can have the entire manor from a litteral bomb exploded here to sparcling clean you could eat from the floor. Danny was entrusted with the secret identeties of the Batfam as well as the batcave.

Bruce was first did all type of reseche of course not just anyone even family of Alfred could just know about their after dark affairs noting that beside the ghost hunter parents and not exactly good grades, Danny was a normal 17 something year old however upon the reveal Danny did not seem surprised at all. How?

"I found the cave like a month ago what do you mean it is hard to find? If we didn't dust it as regularly as we do it would be as obvious as hanging a sign"

Bruce then insits that Danny needs to get some training on self defence and fightling so he doesn't pose too big risks in existing on Wayne manor. Bruce is suprised that Danny is actually able to hold his own in a fight, so after some more reserch he makes the connection that Danny is Phantom.

-------------

Danny likes Tim he is a smart dedicated vigilante guy that somehow reminds him of his early days in the way of how little sleep he gets and just doesn't take care of himself all that much. Danny swore to himself to make sure that Tim takes more care of himself and if he goes a little spooky to do so so be it

Tim is certain that something is up with Danny but just can't put a finger on what and it is driving him mad even more now that Bruce seems to trust him. Danny does impossible tasks that just no one seems to aknowlege. Like sneaking him a coffe when he needs to actually survive the day without sleeping in between somehow danny's coffe just works better than any other he can get anywhere else. Danny seems to also be adament on Tim taking breaks and sleeping. Joy.

Danny the menace he is puts his whole chaos energy into confusing the sleep deprivied Tim with the goal to ultimately get him to sleep. What could convince Tim that he needs more sleep? :

-Danny walks by tim 4 times always coming from a Room that has no other exit or enterece what is so confusing? it is on the second floor and after exiting he doesn't enter the room again

-He would at times just fade out of view as if he was never there

-Sometimes he would invisibly follow him around and move things just so slightly that it could be just be his imagination or sleep deprived brain making stuff up

(-Danny also gives Tim 'coffee' when asked because when Danny makes it he can actually survive the rest of the day without getting tired danny won't share his secret on how he does it ( it is totally ectoplasmd) )

After each confrontation on how he does these things Danny denyies everything and tells him: "I am just one hell of a butler. Now go to bed"

-------------

Dick and Danny upon fist meeting could only be considered imediate sibling adopion or whatever as well as a ever since frequent pun off

Dick also tries to brother Danny around, Danny is in a strange in between position of enjoying it and beeing conflicted on if he should get to attached... it is too late he is too far in at this point

-----------------------

Damien is a little shit at the beginning and probably even after a longer time

Damien might do a spoiled kid route at fist asking for more and more outlandish and impossible tasks, however danny delivers every time

You want something from that one store 2 hours away? here you go

Need something from your grandpa's but seems impossible? here you go

You want an ancient catana one of the first ones ever created? here you go

Space rock? "I don't want a space rock as you called it" I will get you a freakn' space rock

I also imagine that damien would spar with danny at first because danny wanted to teach damien some respect for others and damien because he couldn't let it stand that a freakn civilian can beat him in something like fighting when he was training since he was basiclly just a todler.

As time passes Damien gains Respect for Danny and sees him as a Rolemodle as well as something close to a cousin.

Damien knows of Danny beeing a halfa, they agree to not tell Tim until he figures it out himself

------------------

Now half a year into the whole buttler thing, Jason and Danny meet the first time

Danny feels sick something in here smells rotten it makes him sick what is this horrible smell where did it come from he house is clean the kitchen is freshly cleanded and the trash taken out there is no reason for this foul of smell to exist anywhere near the manor that is when he sees Alfred talking to someone with a white streak in their hair.

"Danny why don't you join us? This is Master Jason. Master Jason this is my Grandson Danny"

"It is a pleasure to meet you" Danny states moving further into the kitchen the smell gets worse but wanting to be polite he still holds out his hand for a handshake

"Hi" Jason greets shortly shaking dannys hand but upon contact jason freezes as invisible energie seems to surrouned Danny it is familliar and comforting and suddenly Jason feels incredibly light he could fly if gravety didn't still exist but man did it feel debatable right now Jason holds Dannys hand a little longer then most would consider normal all while danny seems to look right into his soul some form of understanding within his eyes

"A friend of the other side it seems, I still got (insert task) to do, nice meeting you and we defenetly need to talk, till later"

just like that danny is out of view and after a short transformation out of sight, man does he reek of corrupted ectoplaslm he gave him a little of his own throu his hand shake to lessen the smell but it still smelled so strong

Meanwhile Jason looks to where danny left the room hoping he would return he suddenly felt so safe and the Pits have never been this quiet before forget quiet they are silent for the first time in years jason can think entierly clearly and relaxed

he defenetly needs to visit more often and get Dannys number

-------

during his stay danny only tells bruce damien and jason his halfa status the others just kinda figure it out on their own and ask him about it after a while danny would also totally just chill on the cieling at the most rendom times like 2 am tim goes to get a snack after reserch only for danny to throw him an apple from the cieling and dissapearing. Tim went to bed afterwards

that s all I have rigth now have fun I guess :)

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Black Cat AU

Catwoman hears something on the roof of her condo so she goes up to investigate. She did not expect a teenage boy in a black skintight catsuit to hop up from the ledge and kneel down before putting pouches of jewels and coins in front of her.

She was about to speak, primarily to ask wtf was happening when another much smaller figure of a girl struggled to get over the ledge and onto the roof. The boy looked like he wanted to help, but instead waited for the girl to make it on her own. The girl looked nine. And was she only wearing cat ears and a blindfold to hide her identity? Adorable.

They introduced themselves as Black Cat and Alley Cat respectively before the girl announced that they were reverse adopting her and that they were her new kids.

Black Cat facepalmed as Catwoman laughed, she loved them already.

Damian has the opposite opinion of the duo upon first meeting when both he and Red Robin got so thoroughly humiliated and caught in thier own restraints. The cats proceeded to taunt the birds before kissing both the birds cheeks, leaving lipstick stains that they had to spend an hour scrubbing off.

The cats make extra sure to not use thier powers unless they're cornered and even then they're sneaky about it. They don't want anyone to think they're metas and they sure don't want anyone to know about the "Ghost" thing

Danny is LIVING for the amount of bad luck and cat puns he can make, plus he can add death puns on top of them

(Remember this au because you're going to be seeing a lot of it. Also I know Marvel has a character named Black Cat. Don't @ me about it)

[wakkoroni]

Batfam Incorrect Quotes/Scripts: pt 16

Bruce: Although in schools they say that the pH of battery acid is the same as Stomach acid, battery acid is actually more acidic than stomach acid

Tim: so if I eat enough batteries, I can replace my stomach acid with battery acid

Bruce: what no- that's not how it works. That's not even remotely what I said-

Tim: I'd literally have the stomach of steel

Bruce: You'd die

Tim: *picking up a battery* Hm. Am I worthy of this power

Bruce: Tim. Put down the battery and go to sleep