The Cherry Journal

29 | they/she | surround yourself with what makes you happy

[muscle-sorcerer]

If basil gets buff its fucking over for me

[revivivivify]

[geniusbee]

these are getting weird

[somepunknamedshae]

Gunna start making an effort to say "That's life!" About nice things that happen as opposed to just shitty or annoying things. Sky looks pretty on your drive home from work? That's life. Cat falls asleep in your lap? That's life! Stranger compliments your outfit while walking down the street? That's life!! Beautiful trans woman flirts with you at the bar? THATS LIFE BAYYBEEEEE!!!!!

[hopeless-eccentric]

if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills with my first two wishes, my third wish would be that sabrina carpenter would get gradually taller. she'd be in on it and think it was hilarious. we'd have a strong cap at 7 feet here, maybe an inch a week so people have time to theorize--let's not be ridiculous. but she'd still keep up the "ooh! im so little and small!" schtick. but shed be gradually getting taller. she'd be like 6'1" and still jumping for the microphone. and she'd never say anything about it. and if anyone asked shed act like she had no idea what they were talking about. and shed cheekily play into it a little bit but mostly still keep up the "ooh im so little and small" schtick. do you see my vision. do you get it

[hopeless-eccentric]

ok and so if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills in one wish i would do the sabrina carpenter thing second and third i would wish for all evidence of one random taylor swift song to disappear from the world once every month or so. taylor would have no memory of it. her fans would remember it and there would be an outcry over where it went (it's not even in concert videos anymore!) but taylor would have no memory of it

instead, all her brainspace spent on that song would be replaced with the vivid memories of roman gladiator, taylaurius velox. she's able to hide this at first, but her music begins to take on a gradually romaner and romaner tint. at first, people are like "damn, she's getting REALLY conservative, huh" and other people are like "wow, she's so deep, she knows what a rubicon is" but eventually travis kelce leaves her out of nowhere (he wasn't sure if dating someone possessed by a roman gladiator made him gay or not and anyway he was getting sick of being like "we're going to play the lions" and taylor being like "LIONS? WHERE?") and taylor publishes an entire brutus themed album about this betrayal and it's beginning to weird people out

and so eventually travis kelce is getting like, bomb threats sent to his family for leaving taylor and eventually he's like "okay, okay, i left her because she kept having all these vivid nightmares of gladatorial combat and she kept saying that football was giving her the ick because we never actually killed anybody for the glory of rome" and then he just gets more bomb threats because he left a struggling woman during a mental health crisis

and eventually taylor is writing music about her forbidden roman senator lover and her fanbase is either whittled WAY down or WAY up because people want to watch this trainwreck happen (or maybe she influences culture so hard that we're just all really into rome now) but she's being super cagey about the name of this roman senator. until. and now here's the twist:

weird al has been getting all of the same vivid memories of taylaurius velox. and he still has all his memories of her old songs. so he's writing all these detailed song parodies of taylor swift songs that don't exist anymore including specific details about their shared gladiatorial reality that taylor has never shared with anybody else. including that her lover's name was publius, and she's been calling him Poob for short

at this point a lot of original swifties are leaving. they could do the brutus stuff, but they really can't survive poob. taylor makes a clapping back at the haters song including the lyric "these bitches don't know publius" and it ends up all over all sorts of merch. there's a renewed archaeological interest in roman gladatorial combat

most importantly, the internet discourse is the best it's ever been. does this make taylor swift transmasc? is travis kelce problematic for leaving his fiancee while she gradually morphs into a roman gladiator? is this good queer representation? if taylaurius velox was a gay man, does that mean the gaylors were technically correct? is weird al morally wrong for capitalizing off of her music if she cant remember it anymore? was weird al sent by god to torment taylor swift?

anyway thats what id do if i met a genie

[queerpunksrock]

a boy and a girl can be gay for each other if theyre bisexual and their genders are weird enough

[barstoolblues]

high at trader joes buying all yellow groceries

[hannahp0calypse]

watching Seven Samurai

[athena-cat-wizard-official]

i wonder how many they'll need

[butch-witches-deactivated202412]

i hesitate even to speculate

[firagasoap]

Broccoli Knuckle Duster by David Delahunty

[rozieramati]

How to Save Your Own Life, Erica Jong

[tidesandtwilight]

what is with the cop hate??

Oh sorry for the confusion. It’s because I hate cops

[excuse-me-thanks]

“i should take a walk for my mental health” boring, tired, i don’t even really wanna do it tbh

“i need to check the perimeter” i need to check the perimeter

[unyieldingsilence]

‎ ‎

[xanaxfarts]

this could be us

[tothechaos]

any tips for developing discipline? ive been going through life on a lackadaisical hedonist build but ive got a bunch of mysterious problems that i may or may not be at fault for

[brickylittle]

oh my god I just realized this is the year people will stop being born and stop aging and stop dying

[trippin-on-apple]

What football will look like in the future

Something is terribly wrong. Something is terribly wrong. Something is terribly wrong. Something is terribly wrong.

[problemnyatic]

"I would kill for you. I would die for you" would you take a break for me? Would you sit down and rest? For a day, a week, a year? Would you let others take care of your needs for me? Would you let yourself be held for me? By me?

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Tip: You can keep just about any guy in a little bottle on your bookshelf

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

NOT dudes though, dudes are semi-aquatic and need active tides for surfing or they turn into incels

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

If you have a proper little gentleman he can be free range indoors unless you have a teacup dragon (they are natural competitors for an ecological niche and don’t get along)

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

It’s illegal to keep A Man in your house (that’s kidnapping)

[gaytransgenderwizard]

Hey what about a strange little fellow?

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

A strange little fellow belongs on the moors, howling with the winds and roaming about (free-range), but in a pinch, they can BRIEFLY occupy an attic or laboratory

[thegreenlands]

This is the rule making and information rich content that I come on this site for