Lizard @thisgalliz - Tumblr Blog

Heyall I just remembered pinned posts exist!

Figured I probably should so here we go!

YOU JUST LOST THE GAME

Ok that's all :)

The problem with Batman in his present incarnation is that we need simultaneously to believe that this is a man who can effortlessly ninja his way through dozens of gun-toting mercenaries, and that this is a man to whom Danny DeVito with an umbrella is a credible threat.

prokopetz

Okay, that was glib – let me expand. I'm fully aware that Batman comics generally don't have him fighting guys like the Penguin one on one these days. That's not the problem. The problem is that superhero power creep has rendered Batman functionally immune to hired goons, but owing to his roots as a street-level vigilante, like half of his classic villains are guys whose primary threat vector is the ability to field arbitrary numbers of hired goons. There just aren't a lot of ways to work around that without either doing violence to the villain's idiom or making Batman carry the idiot ball – though I'll grant that some of the attempted workarounds have been very entertaining!

prokopetz

#i say we give the goons powercreep too #some goon moves to gotham and is gobsmacked at the average goons fighting ability; that would render them their own mob boss in another city (via @chaoticspacedust)

You joke, but that's literally one of the workarounds I'm referring to. One of the reasons that recent Batman stories keep looping back around to ancient ninja conspiracy stuff is that an answer to "how do we make hired goons a credible threat when Batman is an invincible ninja?" is "the hired goons are also ninjas".

nos4ra2

Imagine turning to crime out of financial desperation and you can’t even land a job as a dumb knuckle cracking brawler anymore without five years of martial arts training, a CDL in evasive getaway driving and a hand written recommendation from an active member of The Court of Owls.

sharkgirldick

Boob job from a girl with big naturals...?

juniepops

contemptible-scoundrel

probably feels good as hell to be a drunk and belligerent king, and upon finding your gilded chalice has run dry of wine, to throw said chalice really hard at the head of the nearest courtier

exam

I love the beatles but not as much as I love eating cardboard with mayonnaise on top !

newsandstuffisee

rockergiirl

damn your pussy fat and long and hard and outside

jester-operation

I habe some bad news

rockergiirl

BOTH TOWERS?

righthandarm-man

can you remember the name of every person you’ve kissed?

yes, I remember all their names

I could name most of them but there are few I can’t remember

if you put all of them in a room I could put a name to at least half the faces

i’m not confident I could name a quarter of them, let alone half

I can’t remember more than one or two names

I’ve never kissed a soul and want to see the results

Remaining time: 2 days 20 hours

#it depends. because there was somebody in one of my classes where we were curious what tongues tasted like. and we licked each others tongue #s open air so it wasn't like lip contact. also I was in like kindergarten. but I don't remember that person's name so if that counts no but #otherwise I can remember everybody... I think.

dogfluid-deactivated20181205

discworldwitches

r/antarctica Largest Tree in Antarctica, McMurdo Sound, 2025 [OC]

quasi-normalcy

Why do so many Japanese urban legends seem to involve a dialogue tree that you need to follow very carefully?

quasi-normalcy

It's just the interactive element that seems characteristic. Like I hear a claim that, at some point, "everyone dreams of a village littered with blue corpses, and if they trip and fall then they will die in their sleep and become one of them" and ai just immediately know before I even check that, yes, this urban legend originated in Japan.

lizardsfromspace

quasi-normalcy

"Am I pretty?"

"I don't know, you're wearing a mask."

"How about now?"

"...I'd say you're a definite four--" (*remembers that four is bad luck in East Asia because it sounds like death*) "FIVE! I meant five! Definitely meant five!"

sistersorrow

According to Wikipedia, that could actually work according to some versions of the legend

"You're kinda mid, tbh" or "I don't have time for questions" are both valid responses

Maybe chuck some Werther's Originals at her for safe measure

thefloatingstone

flork-of-cows-official

Shower snacks?

flork-of-cows-official

Asked Sclim his opinion and was rewarded with more questions.

flork-of-cows-official

wordfather

not my circus not my monkeys but thanks to my mutuals i know some of the lore

unamusedyams

Cutest girl in the world!!! 💕

mortalityplays

talking about impenetrable accents/dialect just reminded me. when I was in Milan a couple of years back I was staying in this little rathole hotel and I had the biggest fucking migraine, so I was like non c'è problema I'll just go buy painkillers. of course every pharmacy on the map in a three block radius was closed, so my stupid ass just starts wandering around trying to figure out on the fly if you can get OTC from supermarkets in italy.

I walk into this little everything store (to my foreign eyes the kind of place that back home could sell you a bunch of carrots, a 6-pack of beer, pantyhose, bleach and a screwdriver set) and I see some household basics in the back but not what I need. with the confidence of a person who is only in the city for 3 days because he got bored and packed a bag and booked the cheapest flight available the week before (<= MENTAL ILLNESS), I was like no worries I know some italian, I can just ask.

I grab a bottle of water, walk up to the counter, and I'm like Ciao, hai il paracetamolo? And the guy is like che, and I'm like paracetamolo. Per la mia testa. And he's like che?

This is where I would have said 'aspirina' except I can't take aspirin for medical reasons, or 'antidolorifico' except I don't know that word and I've got no phone data for google translate and also I'm stupid. So in my fucked up leith-glasgow-italian accent I'm like paaa-ra-cetta-mollll-ooo. He's like ohhh bene, bene, and he calls another guy out of the back and asks him to go get something. Other guy then walks out of the store into the street, and before I can be like hey, che la fuck, he comes back and hands me a huge bundle of herbs.

At this point I'm like okay this entire interaction has been a bust, but these guys have been very nice and patient and they're both smiling happily at me because they've been of service, so I'm like ahh perfetto, grazie, pay them a couple of euros and leave.

EVENTUALLY I find a pharmacy that's open, and my head is fucking killing me, and my phone still isn't connecting, and now I have this small shrubbery poking out of my coat pocket, so I don't even bother looking around the shelves. I just walk straight to the counter and I'm like uhh ciao, scusi. And hearing my nightmare of an accent the guy answers in english and I'm like thank christ, do you please have paracetamol. Not aspirin, I can't take aspirin. And he's like yeah yeah hold on, goes into the back, comes out with what I need.

Only when he comes out he gives me this look, and then he starts laughing. And then he pretends he's not laughing and rings me up and I pay, and as I'm leaving I can see him losing it. But I don't care, my head is going to explode, I'm going back to the rathole to close the blinds and fall comatose for four hours.

When I get back to my hotel room I take off my coat and remember the huge bouquet of herbs in my pocket. They smell amazing, and I'm like I'm pretty sure this is parsley in which case I can just get some tomatoes and mozzarella later and make it work. but since I have no idea what that interaction was, I want to make sure. I bring out my phone to get a visual reference of what parsley leaves look like, and because I was using it for google translate earlier I put 'parsley' in the wrong box like a dope and translate it to italian.

prezzemolo

I wish I could have been the pharmacist in the moment he looked at my tired pissed off anglophone ass, heard me say 'paracetamol' in my fucked up accent, and turned around saw what was in my pocket. I'd have lost my shit too.

theersatzvegetarian

Pacific Rim has a Build-Your-Own-Jaeger feature on their website. Some folks haven’t taken it as seriously as I suspect the PR folks thought they would.