Who Invited This Guy

Seth. 30. Sometimes an artist, always a desert rat. I published a book.

[pansyfemme]

“never kill yourself” is such a funny phrase to me that i think it’s accidently started working. its like an affrimation. say ‘never kill yourself’ enough times as a joke and maybe you won’t try to kill yourself over minor inconviences anymore

[landmineblogging]

[landmineblogging]

[landmineblogging]

[landmineblogging]

[landmineblogging]

[jesse-is-spiralling]

[leolaroot]

in a hotel room very cautiously removing my clothing slowly and constantly looking around the room shifty and scared as fuck anticipating attacks while a beautiful pair of women sitting side by side on the bed in matching lingerie excitedly but restrained with carefully lowered vioices cheer me on. they say Yes thats it thats how sex works! youre doing it right yeah! youve got it keep going! and im finally down to a sports bra and one tube sock when a car alarm putside startles me and i lunge for the empty handgun on the floor and put it in my mouth while they panic and scramble trying to calm me down petting my hair and cooing gently

[effemimaniac]

[browningtons-deactivated2018041]

[outsidewolves]

[neenarchive]

WATCH WITH BABY???

[surremedy]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

ok picture it: you married some guy who already kinda sucks (voted for Bush twice, tells everyone at parties he “actually prefers Jordan Peterson’s earlier work”). that’s bad enough.

but then—THEN!!—one morning he comes into the kitchen looking like a caveman that’s just discovered fire and announces he’s going “full carnivore.” and suddenly your life is in free fall.

every night you’re in the kitchen cooking two dinners: yours (food, with flavor, texture, vitamins, nutrients, etc) and his, which is just a mug of bacon grease and a plate of hot chicken skin that he eats with the reverence of a medieval monk breaking fast.

and then, like clockwork, at 2am the sounds of hell open up down the hall: your idiot husband has become a human trombone, a double-ended waterpark ride of pure liquid shit. he’s in the bathroom screaming “this is NORMAL, it means it’s working” while you’re Googling “divorce papers pdf free.”

and the worst part? it’s somehow your job to wash his skid-marked Hanes, the same underwear you bought him, because God forbid the man who thinks women shouldn’t have bank accounts also learns how to work the Whirlpool. marriage vows never accounted for this. “for better or worse” did not mean “for carnivore diarrhea.” you could’ve married someone kind, someone curious, someone who likes a vegetable. many vegetables, even. instead you married a man who has made a major life changing diet choice based on memes he saw on facebook about lions not eating bread.

[lovewillbreakyourheartforever]

[godsfavoritespecialangel]

The chances of your fish committing credit card fraud is low, but never 0

[tuxankhamun]

[sourdoughsoul]

[thedudex2]

[timeforsethtojumpoffabridge]

Really good that the only skills I possess will be automated out of existence

[bourtange]

a common misconception is that a revolution is built by years of painstakingly raising class consciousness among the masses while at the same time building up a party capable of taking leadership during a revolutionary crisis. nothing could be further from the truth. a revolution is built by making social media posts calling for a general strike over and over until one day it just happens

[scavengedluxury]

[wayneradiotv]

do NOT step at me on the fourth of footwerk

[segamascott]

[9cl]

Driving around my town trying to find one single burger just one burger or a hot dog but Unfortunately everythings just rubble and twisted scaffolding upstretched and rotting and theres shit on fire and a big black ass sky

[official-kircheis]

[9cl]

Guess i cant do shit anymore Cause the sewers are all muddied with a thousand lonely suicides... And yep, you guessed it: a dark wind blows.