Toll :3 @toll25 - Tumblr Blog

Its still so funny that they even thought to put this in the game in the first place. Yeah sure to get 100% completion you have to actively break the terms of service on purpose. This is normal

redpandarascal

achesspiece

the real moral lesson in chess is that you can only move forwards 5-6 times in your life before you're turned into a beautiful queen but also rarely you might be turned into a horse

number1mongrel

"You hear that? They're saying The Odyssey doesn't even have nobody!"

"They've got nobody in the Odyssey?"

"No I'm saying they don't got nobody."

"Nobody's there?"

"Nobody's not there!"

"So everyone's there?"

"Everybody but nobody!"

hbmmaster

nine-hyacinth

i'm really enjoying the way that this makes it sound like it's his fault. like it's blaming him

villainessbian

Trans positive 1940s mafia goon: of course ya have "broad shoulders" sugar, you ARE a broad.

penny-anna

This is what I would do if I was Count Binface and I actually won:

Resign from office on the grounds that I only ran for the bants, triggering a further by-election

Immediately announce my candidacy for the by-election.

skeletonislandtheme

columbo villains are addicted to logically explaining why they can’t be the killer. columbo will ask them a question and they can never be like omg I have no idea I was in shock, they always gotta be like. ah, lieutenant, I assume I must be your prime suspect since I stood to inherit my great-uncle’s litter of solid gold puppies? well just to clear that up, old man George the puppy smelter can tell you that I entered the barn at precisely 11:53 so I could not possibly have been at the scene of the crime when someone murdered my poor great uncle at 11:55. also I’ve been carrying around this letter which proves that I won’t inherit the puppies anyway just in case you asked me such an insulting question

vetchtibbles

welcome to my farm where I keep my dark horse my black sheep my scapegoat and my underdog. my canary in the coal mine died ages ago

your-personal-ghost

It’s a mess here: someone looked your gift dark horse in the mouth, led it to water, and jumped back on it. Your ducks aren’t in a row, someone counted the chickens before they hatched. Your geese are silly, your brown cows aren’t explaining how, and every one of these sheep is a wolf but they don’t even notice with the amount of wool over their eyes. I’m fining you one million gold coins.

vetchtibbles

it was the goat blame the goat

fullmoonguidance

using windows movie destroyer to make youtube soap

insomniac-arrest

why are ghosts always person-sized in the movies? they don’t have bodies anymore. one of ‘em should have figured out how to work that shit. one of them could be … her 😳