Borrowed Stardust & Recycled Energy

Just a small town girl, living it up in the city. Video games, books, movies, music. Loving wife. Devoted cat mom. Enjoy my “Bullshit Internet Scrapbook”

[marisatomay]

anyway

[crowsent]

updated version

[certifiedgirlthing]

[lucy-is-bored]

Tiktok is the British museum of the internet (very derogatory ofc)

[becuzitisbitter]

You fucking wish the author was dead. The author is on twitter

[ladyananas]

2 sentence horror story

[angstbotfic]

[allsadnshit]

Woke up from a weird nap and saw this reel and it's making me feel like I need to get up and walk for like an hour

[efeceojota]

[barnacle-butch]

[annabelle--cane]

I’ve seen the “get thee to a nunnery” scene done where hamlet has no idea he’s being spied on and just goes off on ophelia because he’s hangry. I’ve seen the “get thee to a nunnery” scene done where hamlet knows he’s being watched from the start and the whole thing’s an act. I’ve seen the “get thee to a nunnery” scene done where hamlet figures out he’s being watched half way through and gets super mad at ophelia for betraying him. now I want to see the “get thee to a nunnery” scene done where ophelia covertly nods at where polonius and claudius are hiding, hamlet gets the idea, and they’re both in on the performance the whole time. I want classically trained shakespearean actors to give us their best best show of bad acting. I want ophelia to mouth some of the most cutting lines to hamlet before he says them. I want hamlet to frown exaggeratedly at her and for her to take this as a cue to start crying. I want hamlet to go grab her by the wrist, her to wince, and him to automatically loosen his grip. I want them to stage hamlet dragging her around by the ear using classic stage-fight techniques. I want them to be aggressively in cahoots with one another because they know each of their bastard father-figures are watching. 

I want this for the lols of seeing them trying to fake-fight on the spot, to give ophelia more to do than just be the victim, and so it never crosses ophelia’s mind that hamlet’s actually losing it a little bit.

that is, until she hears how her father died.

[animatedamerican]

Oh my GOD.

…

OPHELIA [talking just a bit too loudly and clearly] Good my lord, How does your honour for this many a day?

HAMLET [distracted, not quite getting it yet] I humbly thank you; well, well, well.

OPHELIA [even louder, pointedly so] My lord, I have remembrances of yours, That I have longed long to re-deliver; I pray you, now receive them.

HAMLET [caught off guard and genuinely perplexed] No, not I; I never gave you aught.

OPHELIA [exasperated silent sigh, meaningful stare] My honour’d lord, you know right well you did; And, with them, words of so sweet breath composed As made the things more rich: their perfume lost, Take these again; for to the noble mind Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind. [in an undertone, gesturing with her head to where her father and his uncle are hiding:] There, my lord.

HAMLET [after a second or two of silent realization, loud and theatrical] Ha, ha! are you honest?

OPHELIA [exaggeratedly startled] My lord?

… and so on. 

[aprilslady]

You’re a genius

[janeeyreofmanderley]

They actually did something like this in York a few years back! Hamlet entered the stage and Ophelia jerked her head in the direction of the eavesdroppers , Hamlet mouthing a question and she nodded. Then they started talking putting on a performance for the spurs- BUT Hamlet pushing too far. He gets agitated, yells his insults and really does hurt her feelings but only notices he’s gone too far when she rushes away- which in a way made it even worse cause it was obvious she could not tell anymore when he was performing or being genuine- and it showed how deeply shaken their respect and trust in each other was by the events happening around them after all.

they both were being robbed of their agency, becoming playballs of sth bigger than themselves DESPITE everything they try to do avoid exactly that.

[dukeofstratford]

This is exactly the kind of dramaturgical possibility that I love.

And how DARE y'all shatter my heart into a million pieces like that.

[penny-anna]

i think the reason why the assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the funniest political assassinations is for this very simple reason:

1 guy stabs 1 guy: not funny. that's murder.

2 guys stab 1 guy: even less funny. that's two against one.

60 guys stab 1 guy: uproariously funny. why do you need so many guys.

[spatsula-deactivated20181219]

my grandpa saw my gemsona on facebook and now he wants me to draw him a gemsona

[spatsula-deactivated20181219]

he want’s to be an opal!!!!!

[spatsula-deactivated20181219]

 i did a quick one we’ll see what he thinks about it tomorrow!

[reaill]

GEMPA OPAL YAAAAAAH 

[spatsula-deactivated20181219]

AH my twin sister DREW FANART AHAHA!! 

GRAMPS’S REACTION TOMORROW STAY TUNED! 

[spatsula-deactivated20181219]

Here is my grandpa lookin at the post! My sister went over to his house (since I live in a different city) to show him how much you guys love it (and to tell him how cute you think he is!!) I did call them but I wanted my sister to actually show him all the nice tags and how popular he is!

HE also wanted to show you his pug Mordue! They so cute…

He loves it and he’s very happy about how much everyone loved it and so does my mom! Thank you guys so much!!! It really made his day!! He wants to print it out and hang it on the wall so my sister will help with that!

[ofools-deactivated20151107]

thank god for this post

[katiekomics-deactivated20240416]

Always reblog

[ed3nic]

you can’t jokingly post about kinky shit on tumblr because you say smth like “haha wouldn’t it be hot if you…tried to launch internet explorer…but it wouldn’t load :D”

and then you’ll get one thousand robot girls in the notes going “mmngngnnghhhngn”

[puppygirlsunited]

YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME. NO NO THIS IS TOO FUNNY,

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

Devastating to have more evidence that done IS better than perfect

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

Additionally, findings indicate that the act of doing shows you that you were not seeking perfection, you were fearing inadequacy

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

@grey-and-lavender

#oh that last line gutted me #is there a place between perfect and failure?

Good news! There is!

Bad news! It is called 'done'

[grey-and-lavender]

✨ fuck ✨

[liberalsarecool]

Same idiots who say Social Security is a Ponzi scheme are pushing crypto.

Social Security has not missed a payment in over 85 years.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Do you ever write out a multi-paragraph rebuttal to something and then think "actually I do not want to get involved in this" and close it

[myfaenwy]

this is so healthy tho. you get to put your thoughts to words and then you light them on metaphorical fire. cleansing.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

suggestion: vampire characters who actually act their age

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

give me a sitcom about 100-year-old vampires living in a florida retirement community! some of them got turned eons ago and still look young, some of them have only been vamps for a decade or two and look mostly their age, and a few others got turned into vampires whenever but for some random genetic reason still undergo the mortal aging process. give me all of that–and then make their personalities old and grumpy.

so you have a cul-de-sac of florida retirement condos full of pissy aging bloodsuckers who physically range from age 10-years-old to ancient-as-dirt, but they are all unequivocally enthusiastic about bingo & competitively comparing grandkids & printing out MapQuest directions & complaining about Kids These Days (anyone under age 90). greenlight this project immediately and offer Betty White any salary she wants

[othercat2]

for no reason in particular, the nursing assistants should be werewolves.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the ostensible reason is that werewolves are immune to vampire bites. but the more gossipy of the vampire residents insist the werewolves have ulterior motives, up to and including:

A Master Plan of Revenge aka ruining vampires’ hard-won retirement

plans to commit a Heist aka they are all thieves looking to discover secret Vampire Treasure Hoards (yes vampires have hoards like dragons)

the intense power trip of watching Dracula throw a tantrum after losing the shuffleboard championship

the employee health plan is really good

[oft-goes-awry]

Okay, but who’s gonna work the night shift on the full moon?  Because obviously, the werewolves all need that night off, and possibly the next day, too.

[shrewreadings]

Igors.

They get extra TOIL to make up for those -particular- night shifts, which not only include managing the cul de sac’s vampiric inhabitants, but throwing about 3 cases of tennis balls for 3 8-hour overnight shifts straight.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

I have actually never heard this term before but it is my new favorite acronym. TOIL in exchange for toil. I like to think the Igors have a strong union

[theeclectickoalastudent]

Double, Bubble, TOIL for our Troubles

[glitter-peachy-deactivated20251]

[queenofmoons-deactivated2024092]

I think Eileen reads the supernatural books before she even meets the guys bc they’re cheap and available at rest stops across the nation and I think she doesn’t think much about it except “haha Sam and dean. Like the books” until they start telling her stories about their lives and then she’s like. Hang on. Shut up. You’re THEE Sam and dean? I fucking hated those books.

[queenofmoons-deactivated2024092]

She’s like. First of all. Ruby and the angels were clearly fucking with you so write that down. Second of all how did you guys not know vampires are real. Seriously I thought you guys were the worst hunters in the world. I’m not saying I could stop the apocalypse better than you but I totally could.

[queenofmoons-deactivated2024092]

Eileen’s like why did you have to Google how to kill a werewolf. It’s always silver. It has never not been silver. That’s, like, basic lore. Meanwhile Sam is spam texting Charlie to get those fucking books off of the internet

[tenisperfection]

Sometimes, if you’re lucky, there will be a tree outside your bedroom window. It is very important to romanticize this tree as much as possible.

[hiveswap]

Everyone say thank you american indigenous people for cultivating corn, potatoes, peppers, tomatoes, cacao, pumpkin, squash, and anything i missed. Makes life more meaningful globally

[niyarest]

im from an alternate universe but not a cool interesting one, the only difference is that a natural third option when asking if you'd like something to drink other than coffee and tea is instant soup in a cup

[niyarest]

it just makes sense to offer a savory option

lots of flavors too

[niyarest]

Coffee Shop AU is not as popular as Soup Store AU there

[gobusto]

makes sense, there's more options; the only thing to do in a coffee shop is buy coffee, but in a soup store you could also buy clothes