quiescence.

cassandra cain enthusiast. dc and marvel fan. has far too many hyper fixations

[urfavdirtbag]

concerning that i have so much to post but i kid you not i've already filled up three entire pages with this man

i don't do digital art much and i drew this using my fingers but i love him so much i must share my love for him to the world...

[urfavdirtbag]

back but not because dc 😨 [ i've yet to watch superman, though- so be on the look out ] a friend got me into resident evil [ i've been a part of the fandom for a long time but very unactive tbh ] but like when i say resident evil im literally only talking about one guy

i lauv u ethan winters he's so silly staring at him like he's some weird fish i found in a swamp

[urfavdirtbag]

logging on again to post this and forget to log back in for another 2 months 😭

[urfavdirtbag]

lowk died for a min uhhhhh sorry. but - life gets busy sometimes. we all know this. BUT. i need answers fellas. do i make a dc ocs cause i see all my fav dc artists n doin it n like,,, i wanna join in on the chaos too. but im also not very sure :/ give me ya thoughts.

[starspilli]

honkshoo mimimi

[rubiowl]

First post ever..be nice to me :')

Ft my faves of the bat sibling🦇🦇🦇

[crowwkui]

[corner a cat, get scratched!] ฅ₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎ฅ

[chaoticbatfam]

Bruce: so, son, how go things in the author life? Jason: eh. *gets into really long rant about the dangers of booktok/bookstagram review/rating culture* it’s like, if you didn’t like the book, then have the courtesy to keep your bad review to yourself. Or at least encourage the author to continue writing, rather than saying shit like they are a failure and should never have published their book Bruce: *nodding* you know, with scientific papers— Jason: that is so far from the same thing I can’t even articulate it

[urfavdirtbag]

i love how i've committed to rhe batman theme on all my accs EXCEPT this one. the one account that i exclusively talk about batman and the batfam and all that jazz.

my insta is cass, my discord is chris bale's bat, my pinterest is one of dan mora's bat,l etc etc

like... where is my continuity 😭

tbh it's prob because i don't know who to base this acc off

[the-jason-todd-impreganator]

I have been watching seven kids all day long and need to project the trauma of parenting somewhere, so... Batfam quotes :D

—

Bruce, half awake in a sitting room: Please, stop.

Jason, trying to suffocate Tim with a pillow: GIVE ME THE REMOTE!

Tim: *Muffled swears*

Damian, helping Jason: WE WANT TO WATCH MEAN GIRLS!

Cass, tackling Jason from behind: OFF OUR BROTHER!

Dick: Guys please, the doctor said we had to keep Tim's blood pressure down!

Duke: Man, we need to keep all our blood pressure down, he ain't special.

Bruce: Please, don't kill your brother.

Stephanie: Guys, he stopped fighting.

Dick: OH MY GODS YOU KILLED TIM!?

Damian: Oh no.

Cass, kneeing Jason in the stomach and grinning as he falls to the ground:

Duke: Nah, I think he just passed out.

Bruce: If any of you are dead I'm going to enter a depressive episode that will result in one of you becoming Batman by the end of it.

Dick: OH MY GOD TIM COME BACK TO LIFE I CAN'T DO THIS AGAIN!

Damian: DRAKE!?

Cass: I will find a Lazarus pit.

Jason: Nah, I'll just call Talia.

Duke: Y'all, he's breathin', I think he just fell asleep.

Stephanie, checking his pulse:

Stephanie: Yeah, he did. Classic Tim.

Bruce, under his breath: Thank god, I like that one.

—

Tim: Bruce, I have to tell you something.

Bruce: Yes, Tim?

Tim: . . . I'm bi.

Bruce: . . . Didn't you already come out to me?

Tim: Wait, what!? No!

Bruce: . . . No, no you did, you were... The ginger. The ginger one with arrows.

Tim: That was Dick, B.

Bruce: No, Dick wasn't a ginger, Jason was before the hair dye—

Tim: Different timeline, also that was Dick and Roy!

Bruce: Didn't Jason date Roy?

Tim: Bruce. Jason dated Roy, Dick dated Roy, they both dated Roy

Bruce: Oh, oh! Yes, of course... Wait, no, Dick was with the alien.

Tim: Kori and Dick broke up, Bruce.

Bruce: No, he was with the— the kryptonian.

Tim: Bruce, that's you.

Bruce: No, no, Connor.

Tim: Nobody in this family has ever dated Kon, and he's my friend!

Bruce:

Bruce: You aren't dating Connor? Oh, yes, you are with... Stephanie.

Tim: She and I broke up, she's with Cass now, I'm dating Bernard!

Bruce: The... Speedster?

Tim: Oh my god, Bruce, this isn't complicated... Bart is the speedster, Bernard is a human, regular human, not a vigilante or anything, and he's my old high school friend. We are dating now.

Bruce: Oh, yes. Okay. Sorry, I haven't updated the chart since Jason...

Tim: You had a chart to keep track of your kids dating history? When you had two kids!?

Bruce: Dick was complicated, and Jason dated a girl named Rena.

Tim: Again, different timeline, Bruce, they got back together in this one though (because op said so.)

Bruce:

Bruce: What?

Tim: Rena and Jason are dating but Jason also occasionally dates Roy at the same time, Dick is gonna get back together with Kori eventually, we're just waiting for the writers to get their sh&# together, I'm with Bernard, Stephanie and Cass are dating, this isn't a complicated thing, at all.

Bruce:

Bruce: I need to update my charts.

—

TV show host: So, can you introduce your kids for us?

Bruce:

Bruce: Yes, uh, of course.

Bruce, pointing to Dick: My eldest, Richard Grayson.

Bruce, pointing to Tim: My second, Jason— wait, no, he's dead. That one died.

Tim: Please never mistake me for Jason again, I just had several flashbacks.

Bruce: Yes, sorry, no, this is my third son, Tim.

Bruce, pointing to Cass: My daughter, Cassandra, she likes art—

Cass: No, ballet.

Bruce: What? No, Tim likes ballet.

Tim: I hate being the middle child so much.

Damian: Technically Cain is the middle.

Cass: No, Tim likes skateboards and dungeons and dragons.

Bruce: Okay, haha, sorry. So, uh, my youngest...

Damian:

Bruce: That I...

Damian:

Bruce: Adopted..?

Damian: WHAT!?

Bruce: Wait, no, Jason was Talia's, so—

Damian: HE WAS FOUND NEAR A DUMPSTER!

Bruce: Oh, then Tim—

Tim: SERIOUSLY!?

Dick: Bruce this is actually concerning.

Bruce: One of you I made! Cass!?

Cass, visibly concerned: Really?

Bruce: Okay, so, uh...

TV host: Should... Do you need a moment?

Bruce: No, no, I have five children— wait, no, six. Wait, did I adopt Duke?

Dick: No, he lives with his Mom again, she got better, but you didn't even adopt me so why's it matter?

Bruce:

Bruce: I FORGOT TO ADOPT YOU!?

Dick: WHAT DO YOU MEAN FORGOT!?

Tim: I hate this family...

Cass, patting his back:

Damian: At least he remembered your names!

Jason, laughing from his apartment:

—

Tim and Cass sitting at the bat computer:

Bruce, walking over to press a kiss to Cass' hair:

Tim: ???

Bruce, walking over to Cass, patting her shoulder: Good work, son. Get to bed soon.

Cass: . . ?

Bruce, walking away:

Tim: Did he..?

Cass: Again. Yes.

—

Bruce, to Alfred: Alfred, please, I need help with Christmas again.

Alfred: Master Bruce, you have itemized lists of each villain, you can recall them all and memorize all their weaknesses and lives. You cannot do the same for your own children?

Bruce: Please, Alfred, don't make me feel bad. One of them asked for an explosive and I don't know which!?

Alfred: That could very well be several of them...

—

Bruce, walking into the kitchen where all the kids are sitting: Alright, come on Tim, time for patrol.

Tim: Why aren't you going with Robin?

Bruce: You are Robin?

Damian: Father, I am Robin.

Bruce: Why'd I do that?

Damian: What do you mean WHY DID YOU DO THAT!?

Dick: I did that, actually.

Bruce: Why? What did Tim do?

Damian: WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME!?

Bruce: Nothing, nothing, I just... Tim was Robin, last I checked.

Jason: Bruce, what's the order of your Robin's?

Bruce:

Bruce: It... Okay, Dick,

Dick: Yes..?

Bruce: Then... Stephanie.

Jason: Wow.

Bruce: What!? She died! Two of you died and came back!

Damian: I also died.

Bruce: What? No, you came after Stephanie.

Damian: Yes.

Bruce: Alright, so, Dick, Stephanie—

Jason: REALLY!? I did not die in your arms for this. I wish I died in someone's else's arms. F-#% you.

Bruce: No, no! I'm sorry, you're right, Dick, Jason... Then... Alright, Stephanie and Damian came somewhere, obviously, but Tim is my Robin now! Right?!

Tim: Bruce, Alfred and Dick gave Robin to Damian after you got lost in the time stream.

Bruce:

Bruce: Oh. Uh. Okay... Damian, time for patrol—

Damian: No, I'm going with Richard tonight. You may have DRAKE!

Bruce: No, I'm sorry, son, please.

Damian, storming out:

Bruce, chasing after him: Please, I have had so many of you! And so many hits to the head!

Tim: How come he only ever remembers Dick's stuff?

Jason: Favouritism.

Dick: I fell on his head a lot as a kid. I also used to whisper in his ear as a kid when he slept that I would be the only child he'd ever have and love, so...

Tim:

Jason: And I'm remembered as the bad kid???

—

Bruce: You're grounded.

Barbara: ??? I'm not your kid, Bruce.

Bruce: What?

Barbara: Really? No, I'm not dealing with this, get a neurologist, Bruce.

Bruce: It's not a problem!

—

Bruce, on the phone: Hey, Jay, lad! Are you coming to the gala this weekend?

Jason: ??? I'm dead.

Bruce: What?!

Jason: No! I am legally dead, Bruce!

Bruce: Oh thank god, I thought I was hallucinating again...

Jason: Huh?

Bruce: Nothing, nothing... Wait, why haven't I brought you back to legally alive?

Jason: Hell if I know.

Bruce:

Bruce: Will you come to the gala if—

Jason, hanging up:

—

Bernard:

Bruce:

Bernard:

Bruce: Stephanie, when did you become transgender???

Bernard, trying not to laugh:

Tim: This is why I didn't want you two to meet.

—

Bruce, on the phone: DUKE THOMAS WHY AREN'T YOU HOME!?

Duke: ??? I am.

Bruce: Where?! I checked the entire manor!

Duke: I don't live with you???

Bruce: Oh my god did I fire you???

Duke: What? No? I live with my Mom?

Bruce: . . . She's alive?

Duke: B, that's... All the other kids minus Cass and Damian.

Bruce: Oh...

Duke: Get help, man.

—

Tim, eating cereal at two in the morning:

Bruce, stepping inside the dark room, blinking slowly:

Bruce: Oh, Jason—

Tim: I am so done.

—

[prlssprfctn]

A big fan of crack-au, where UTRH goes wrong, and Bruce just accepts Jason back because he misses him, except for some reason he dreads telling all the story to kids, so now he just brings back home Red Hood without telling others that it is Jason. Jason is amused because of course he is... he has such a vast space for teasing the shit out of family.

Dick: Wait, WHAT? Dick: I know I said that Red Hood low-key was impressive, but it wasn't supposed to be an, uh, encouragement for adopting him? Tim: Screw that. Why is he still in his helmet? He is allowed to know who we are, but we are going to cover his identity? How is that fair? Bruce: Well. You see... Jason: I am not taking my helmet off. When I was a kid, Joker butchered my face. Tim, awkwardly: ...Okay, I see an adopting requirement is passed. Bruce: ...Tim, I don't have requirements for- Dick: Still sounds like bullshit to me. How old are you? Jason: Nineteen, fuck ass. Dick, instantly melting: OH MY GOD, IT IS A BABY CRIME LORD!

Bruce, sighing: Lad, I feel so guilty for lying to them Jason, shrugging: You weren't that guilty when you allowed this ugly memorial to stay in the Batcave. Bruce: ... Alfred: Good point. Bruce, frustrated: Al, you put it in the first place. Jason: He paid off by his Friday lasagna delivery to my doors. It is your turn. Bruce: *quiet sigh*

Jason, appearing out of nowhere behind Dick's back: So, I heard you have a dead brother. Dick: Jesus- What- Jason: You liked him much? Dick: What? Of course. I loved Jason, he was my baby. Why are you asking that? Jason, humming: No reason. Keep it up.

Tim: I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you, but I *will* get to the bottom of it. Also, your strange obsession with Jason is low-key weird. Jason, trashing out Tim's stalker stash: Really, what about yours? Tim: YOU MOTHERFUCKER-

Bruce: So... You feel better, Jason? Jason: Yep. Totally satisfied. Bruce, hopeful: So, about you being the crime lord- Jason: So, about admitting to your kids that I am not a rando? Bruce: ...Uhh. Never mind, you are doing great, sweetheart.

Dick, carrying groceries: Oh, come on. Red Hood is cute. He is just a little socially awkward, but overall? A baby. Tim, grunting, while opening the kitchen door: The nicest thing he had done was editing my last-minute essays. Overall, he can go and fuck himself. Jason, without a helmet, having a tea party with Alfred and Bruce in the kitchen: ... Dick and Tim: ... Bruce: ... Jason: Oh, fuck my life, since when you two know a road to the KITCHEN Dick: LITTLE WING? Bruce: I... I can explain. Tim: You sleazy motherfucker. I *knew* Babs deleted some footage from your cowl, I KNEW IT. Bruce: I CAN EXPLAIN! Dick, in tears: JAY. BABY. Jason, trying to escape the kitchen: I am just a hallucination. You didn't see a shit. Dick: No, you are not. Your hallucination sits on the counter, silly. Jason: ...The fuck? Bruce, catching Jason by the collar, whispering: Don't leave me alone there. Help me out. Say something to avert the attention. Jason, panicking: Uh Jason: By the way, we have another brother, he is a biological son of Bruce and Talia, and his name is Damian Everyone: WHAT Jason: Well. Bye. Jason: *jumps out of the window*

[frownyalfred]

Love me some Tony stark unfortunately all bruce has to do is send oracle a text

Broke: Bruce gets offended when people compare him to Tony Stark

Woke: Oracle gets offended when people compare Bruce to Tony Stark

[frownyalfred]

"--unfortunately all bruce has to do is send oracle a text" is sticking in my head like crazy this morning.

--

New Message: 01:23:59 (B)

Stark

New Message: 01:24:37 (B)

please

---

Barbara sat back in her computer chair, giving her triple monitor set-up one final, appreciative look. Her finger hovered over the enter button, waiting to input the final command.

Are you being mean, she reminded herself, or are you just a woman in STEM?

The answer was almost always the latter, even when it came to Oracle stuff. There also weren't a lot of days when Bruce actually managed a please within a text message. Stark flying around Gotham willy-nilly seeking out the Bat wasn't an issue he wanted to handle. He just wanted the annoying gnat gone.

This was, of course, in no way related to Bruce Wayne's public dislike for Tony Stark. A dislike, Barbara knew, came from Stark's unbearable need to be the smartest person in any given room. And the loudest.

Barbara hit the enter button with her thumb. The screens flickered, running with the new command in a lightning-fast cascade of data. Her backup PCs kicked on in the background, belching hot, metallic air into the room as they began to work furiously.

---

New Message: 01:29:07 (O)

hope you have eyes up

New Message: 01:29:07 (O)

😘

---

"What the fuck," Tony Stark said as the thrusters on his boots dimmed. "Friday, why are you diverting power? I'm trying to go up."

Friday didn't answer. Tony opened his mouth to ask again, only for the thrusters at his wrists and palms to click off a second later. He shook them, staring in disbelief, but there was no power. Nothing. Nada.

The suit began to slow its ascent, gravity dragging it back down to Earth without the extra power. It hung there in the Gotham sky for a moment before the Earth won, and they entered free-fall.

"Friday, any time now," Tony said from between gritted teeth. "Friday. Manual override."

The HUD went red at the edges, indicating a manual override. Life support remained operational, but the mechnical panel was entirely blanked out and grey. No power, no control.

Just when Tony was debating bailing out with the arc reactor and the slim-packed parachute in the suit shoulderblades, a comm line clicked in through the communications panel. It bypassed his admin approval, patching through directly to him on a private line.

"Friday?" a woman's voice said in his ear, sounding amused. She was decidedly not Friday.

"You're not Friday," Tony said, trying to play it cool. It was hard to do that when someone else had full view of the biometrics of his suit.

"Mhmm."

The boot and wrist thrusters powered back on, giving him a cool forty feet or so of room before he went splat on the Gotham sidewalk below. Tony took in a relieved breath.

"Sorry, that was just for fun," the mystery woman said. "I'm taking remote control for a few minutes. Once you're at the target location, you'll get full auth back. I just need to borrow it for a second."

Borrow. Like hacking into an Iron Man suit was easy.

The thrusters pushed him back up into the sky, at twice the usual rate he allowed outside of emergency situations. Tony gritted his teeth at the G-forces, unwilling to let the mystery woman see him sweat.

"Where are you taking me?" Tony asked, trying to manual override again with a click command. The comms screen blinked at him, denying access.

"I hear Antarctica is nice this time of year."

"You're shitting me."

The thrusters kicked up another notch. Tony blinked as a flight plan to Antarctica popped up on his HUD.

"Have fun," the mystery woman said, way more cheery than she deserved to be. Hackers weren't usually so happy. "You know, penguins look a little like bats from the right angle. Maybe you can hunt down one of them instead."

Several things clicked into place all at once in Tony's head, rapid-fire.

"You're Oracle."

Oracle hummed again, amused. "I am. And -- I've been waiting to say this for ages now, so you gotta let me do it."

"Do what?" Tony asked weakly. God, this was fast. His vision was going a little blurry at the edges.

Oracle cleared her throat, putting on a familiar growl. Tony already knew what was coming, and still. Still.

"Get the hell out of my city."

"Funny."

"I try," Oracle said. "Anyway, enjoy your trip, don't come back, Gotham airspace is mine, etc. Tell Friday I said hello. Remember to file your taxes, those are coming up soon."

The comm line went dead. Then, so did the screens in his HUD. The only things still running were the life support and thrusters. And he didn't even have access to those.

Well. Fuck.

"Friday," Tony said, just in case she was running in the background. "New note: poach Gotham's Oracle at any cost. I don't care how expensive she is."

[chaoticbatfam]

just found out that kids stop losing teeth from 10-12 y/o so:

dick, damian, or very early jason loses a tooth on patrol (literally fell out of his mouth) and asks batman to keep it for the tooth fairy, but upon getting home, batman gets called away on a JL mission with the tooth still in his utility belt and this ultimately results in superman happening to see it

batman: the mission went wel-- superman: *chokes on his energy drink* batman: . . . are you okay, superman? wonder woman: *pats superman on the back* superman: is that a HUMAN TOOTH, BATS batman: *looks down at his utility belt* of course it's human? superman: *hack-coughing, face horrified* WHY batman: . . . you do know children shed them, yes? superman: YEAH BUT WHY'RE YOU CARRYING IT AROUND??? wonder woman: *interestedly* is it like a trophy? did you defeat this child in battle? superman: *an active conspiracy theorist* OH MY GOD, ARE YOU THE TOOTH FAIRY? IS SHE A RESULT OF THE BATMAN? IS SHE SOME KIND OF ROBOT YOU BUILT AND SPREAD LEGENDS ABOUT SO THAT YOU COULD DISGUISE THE FACT THAT YOU STEAL CHILDRENS' TEETH? batman: batman: what the fuck, clark

[urfavdirtbag]

I

[chaoticbatfam]

…….yea?

[urfavdirtbag]

I DIDNT EVEN REALISED I REBLOGGED THIS LMAO THAT WAS TOTALLY A MISTAKE BAHAHAHA

[chaoticbatfam]

just found out that kids stop losing teeth from 10-12 y/o so:

dick, damian, or very early jason loses a tooth on patrol (literally fell out of his mouth) and asks batman to keep it for the tooth fairy, but upon getting home, batman gets called away on a JL mission with the tooth still in his utility belt and this ultimately results in superman happening to see it

batman: the mission went wel-- superman: *chokes on his energy drink* batman: . . . are you okay, superman? wonder woman: *pats superman on the back* superman: is that a HUMAN TOOTH, BATS batman: *looks down at his utility belt* of course it's human? superman: *hack-coughing, face horrified* WHY batman: . . . you do know children shed them, yes? superman: YEAH BUT WHY'RE YOU CARRYING IT AROUND??? wonder woman: *interestedly* is it like a trophy? did you defeat this child in battle? superman: *an active conspiracy theorist* OH MY GOD, ARE YOU THE TOOTH FAIRY? IS SHE A RESULT OF THE BATMAN? IS SHE SOME KIND OF ROBOT YOU BUILT AND SPREAD LEGENDS ABOUT SO THAT YOU COULD DISGUISE THE FACT THAT YOU STEAL CHILDRENS' TEETH? batman: batman: what the fuck, clark

[urfavdirtbag]

I

[urfavdirtbag]

sobbing over user @laoixfish cause they we asking around in this server what type of deity would they be and then assigned whoever offered thier thoughts what THEY think what type of deity we'd be.

and she said i'd be the deity of the satisfaction one gets of writing, specifically using a fountain pen AND THAT'S SO BEAUTIFUL WTFFFF.

lob u fishy/p

[chaoticbatfam]

do you have any cass and jason hcs and or scenarios clattering around in your brain that you'd like to share with the class?-

also, your like really nice and lovely and thanks for sharing your feelings and thoughts about our favourite dysfunctional family 💞

lol I’m so sorry it took me a while to get to this, I have family over rn and shit's hectic

I’m glad you like my blog! It’s my “I’m bored and absolutely have better things to do but won’t” pastime. You’re lovely as well <3

Omg I have so many Jason and Cass headcanons actually. They’re one of my favorite underrated duos, right after Jason and Steph. here are a couple:

when cass has ballet recitals, jason is the one to organize the family and make sure that everyone attends. he attended one recital where everyone else was so busy that they forgot to show up and he vowed that he wasn't ever going to let it happen again after seeing how cass's smile flickered at the sight of just him in the seats.

the entire batfam has learned to recognize the signs. and by signs i mean

jason: you doing anything this thursday? tim: yeah there's this mission--- jason: *deleting the entire mission file* not anymore tim:

jason: *shoves a nice suit or dress at steph* steph: what the fuck is this for??? jason: wear it or else steph:

and then he kind of just stares menacingly from the school steps, waiting as he watches every member of the family enter, before he enters himself.

cass is the only person jason (willingly) lets watch him while he cooks. you know how having people hover while you're in the kitchen is fucking annoying? like, even if they're being super nice?? like get the hell out of here before i whack you with a wooden spoon, you're not getting the cookie dough or whatever other shit you want??? just me??? well, cass is the exception for jason. she's quiet, she's polite, and more than that, jason sees her as a possible culinary apprentice. he lets her watch because the more she watches, the less likely she is to put celery in the fucking cookies again. she's . . . getting there.

(jason is slightly delusional. but no one's gonna tell him that because its adorable bonding time. they just . . . refrain from tasting cass' cookies. or at least, they try. until jason glares so har they're afraid he's gonna light the curtains on fire with just his eyeballs)

jason and cass have a running tally on a whiteboard in the living room. on one side is her name, the other his. there are currently more marks on his side, but she's been erasing them and adding to her own side and he hasn't figured it out yet. what does this tally count, you might ask? people who have said one or the other is older. neither jason nor cass have their birth certificates. neither one really knows their birthday, either---they just know they were born the same year. so they ask people---"Do i look older? or does she/he?" and whatever that person says (the results are surprisingly mixed, for how tall jason is in comparison to her) they mark it down and that person gets to be oldest until that tall changes

[infectiouspiss]

if vampires can't come inside without permission does that mean that you can just keep riding that thang and they can't um . yknow

[s0up-for-sluts]

Reblog to edge a vampire