veggie_chic_01

[colgatebluemintygel]

i dont even have guilty pleasures anymore i just like stuff and if people have a problem with that they can go fuck themselves

[justcutecows-blog]

Friends, not food. 🌱🐮❤

[kidkitthekingslayer]

The fact that nobody is talking about Secret’s new commercials pisses me off

[softwhorecore-deactivated201812]

This makes me so happy ☺️

[iamhannalashay]

Yesssss😭 I damn near cried

[jaxuhmillion]

I LOVE THIS OMFG

[taylorzrealm]

YOOOOOOOOOOO THATS AMAZING!!!!!

[saiasus]

[trufflebootybuttercream-deactiv]

Can someone help me understand I wanna cry to ..I feel something went over my head

[writingsandwonders]

The woman in the bathroom is trans and is scared that if she comes out of the stall the women that walked in will insult or harass her. but when she comes out they compliment her on her dress instead. The add ends with saying “stress tested for women.” It means Secret is including trans women in their definition of women. 

[viragon]

I have reblogged this three times now, each one mentioning the fact that Secret not only included a trans woman, but that they /had the other women compliment her dress and treat her with respect/. I will reblog this every time I see it because it’s so important. More companies should involve trans people in their marketing - we do exist. Props to Secret for getting in on this movement. It makes me really happy to see more of the trans community represented in daily television.

[kyonite]

this is the perfect grade of good luck

reblog in 5 seconds and all of your grades will inch ever closer to perfect

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

concept: let’s go to bed at 9pm instead of 3am. let’s drink more water for our bodily health and less coffee for the aesthetic. let’s not skip breakfast because it’s worth running a little behind even if it’s just some fruit or cereal. let’s go socialize even if we’re kinda nervous. let’s love ourselves when we feel down, because flaws are not the end of the world. let’s work hard but take breaks in between instead of procrastinating and then rushing. let’s ignore what people who don’t know us have to say about us behind our backs. let’s be kind to each other because we’re all trying here. let’s hype up being mentally healthy rather than being perfect. let’s live our lives like we want to.

just a thought.

[wnine]

2017-03-28

Another morning at Starbucks ☕️ It’s so cozy and my hazelnut 🌰 latte was so delicious I didn’t want to leave!! + got some revision done 📖✍🏼

[amandagenine-deactivated2019062]

“No one in my family, not one of my friends or classmates realized that I was going through life asleep. It was literally true: I was going through life asleep. My body had no more feeling than a drowned corpse. My very existence, my life in the world, seemed like a hallucination. A strong wind would make me think my body was about to be blown to the end of the earth, to some land I had never seen or heard of, where my mind and body would separate forever. ‘Hold tight’, I would tell myself, but there was nothing for me to hold on to.”

—

Haruki Murakami

(via

purplebuddhaquotes

)

[hancarolyn]

randomly complimenting people is great. what did it cost u? nothing. and u probably made their day.

[gnusnoteunuchs]

experiment goal: to determine whether smarties are an effective tea sweetener

hypothesis: smarties will sweeten the tea, but also introduce unwelcome flavor profiles due to their flavoring

procedure: procured one cup (≈12 fl oz) of Barry’s Tea Gold Blend black tea, hot. added 2/3 of a single roll of smarties candy (10 candies). wait for candies to dissolve, then stir well. tea will be sampled after stirring concludes.

[gnusnoteunuchs]

addendum: control group was used. control sample consisted of one cup of the same type of tea, sweetened with white sugar. results will depend on the relative tastes of the control and smarties tea

[gnusnoteunuchs]

results: smarties tea was significantly more bitter and less sweet than sugar tea. additionally, the smarties failed to dissolve in the expected manner, and when stirred, ended up breaking down into particulates that refused to dissolve. 

conclusions: because of the chemical/structural makeup of smarties, they do not function well as an ad hoc tea sweetener because of their reluctance to break down. it may be the case that crushed smarties would work better, but this experiment was intended to study how normal, uncrushed smarties would work as a sweetener

[thenerdyindividual]

[writing-prompt-s]

Every year, the richest person in America is declared the “Winner of Capitalism.” They get a badge. Then all of their wealth is donated to charity and they have to start over at $0.

[lordachoo]

This procedure results in the worlds richest people donating excessive amounts of money ahead of the event in an attempt to avoid being hit by a real life blue shell. Thus adding to the overall annual donation.

[sapphic-giraffic]

Y'all think this is a joke but that’s literally how taxes are *supposed* to work

[debrides]

I worked with toddlers and pre schoolers for three years. Sometimes I accidentally slip and tell a friend to say bye to an inanimate object (“say bye bus!”) & occasionally they unthinkingly just do it.

[lesbirdan]

I’m glad there’s a teacher version of “accidentally called teacher ‘mom’”

[hermionegranger]

when I worked at Medieval Times occasionally I would slip in real life and call people “my lord”

[mugsandpugs1-deactivated2019010]

One time during family prayer, dad began: “our father who art in heaven, American Airlines, how can I help you?”

[thomrainierskies]

One time my dad went to the White Castle drive-thru and the lady (who was supposed to say ‘Welcome to White Castle, what’s your crave?’) asked, “Welcome to White Castle, what’s your problem?”

She apologized profusely while my dad proceeded to lose his shit laughing.

[mirab3lle]

Yesterday I went to Wendy’s and the girl said “Welcome to McDonalds” and then just sighed

[icouldwritebooks]

Somebody in the elevator asked me what floor I lived on, and I answered “please open your books to page eight”, and we just kind of stared at each other, blinking.

[crimeronan]

i work retail full time and my script gets frequently messy - ill ask the same question twice, or say “$2.60 is your total” while handing back their change, or say “how are you doing today?” instead of “have a good day!” like name it ive bungled it

but anyway, this lady came thru my line buying a book and the review on the front said: “few books are well written, fewer still are important, and this book manages to be both”

as i handed her the bag i was trying to say “thanks, youre all set” and instead my brain mashed up the review and i said “thanks, youre important”

there was this short pause in which i tried to figure out what the fuck id just said. she blinked and then said “oh thank you! youre important too!”

the real kicker was one of my coworkers. when i was relating this story later his response was “at least you said something NICE. last week i accidentally combined ‘youre welcome’ and ‘no problem’ into ‘youre a problem’”

[agrestenoir]

one time, since I used to work as a daycare teacher with preschoolers, i was on my college campus in my gym, and someone was running in the weight room and tripped over a machine and fell, and instead of offering to help, I just stared and said, “This is why we use our walking feet.” we both sat there for a while until the guy nodded and said, “yeah, okay, i should’ve done that.”

[gin-and-eschatonic]

I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in kitchens, so I still will reflexively say shit like “behind” and “coming around” as I maneuver through spaces and around people.

Which, actually, not such a bad thing; I’m a big guy and can come across as imposing pretty easily. The position calls can help defuse that, and also help avoid collisions.

Less good is the time my brain was half functional and I let slip a “coming with a knife” while grocery shopping. THAT took some explaining.

[harold-theyre-thespians]

I work in an office and send tens of emails to customers every day. Once my mum asked me to send her a train ticket I had bought for her. I emailed her “Hello mum, as agreed, please find attached the ticked you requested. Thanks, Alex”

[narwhalsarefalling]

i worked as a camp counselor, and i would have the kids tap somewhere on my legs if they needed something because im a pretty tall dude. today asked my cat if he needed something.

[wren-likethe-bird]

I have woken up in a cold sweat saying “is that for here or to go?”

[la-mancha-screwjob]

Every time a friend thanks me, and I respond with “gladly” or “my pleasure”, I die completely 1000% inside

[fair-itself]

I work at a plasma donation center. When processing donors, we call them by name, they walk up to the counter, and then we ask for their name and donor number. One time, instead of saying “Robert” I hollered “Name and donor number!?” into a full waiting room. Three people started announcing their names and donor numbers before we all realized that I fucked up.

[maplefiasco]

In college, I was a barista at Borders (remember Borders, you guys?!) I once drove through Taco Bell on my way home after a shift. When the cashier said, “okay, that’ll be $5.46!” I cheerfully responded, “Do you have a Borders rewards card?”

[iamthatbeast]

I have dealt with so many difficult customers over the years that I used to angrily call my dog “Sir” when I was mad at him.

[widonotts]

My first job was at my nearest Panera, and after coming home from a ten-hour Sunday morning shift, I was exhausted; but when my mom called me to come downstairs, instead of replying in the grumpy teenagerish tone I usually would, I said in my cheeriest, fakest voice, “Not a problem at all, let me just check with my manager!” before realizing my mistake.

[artwlw]

my coworker went to back up the cash registers one time and she had been at customer service right before. when we finish with a customer we have to sometimes get the attention of the next person and will shout “i can get the next person in line!” but instead of saying that she yelled “HI WHAT CAN I HELP YOU WITH” to everyone in the general area

[youlovelucie]

I have told my dog “no thank you” so many times after working at a preschool

[spacecores]

a couple of times i’ve gotten stuck in a hello how are you good how are you good how are you loop with an equally tired Fred Meyer’s cashier after a long shift but the best time was after a 10 to 10 post-holidays after they told me my total, I asked if they would like a bag today and after a confused few seconds they were like, “no… I have the bags”

[thebritishteapot]

Worked in a gallery where we asked people to take off their backpacks in order not to accidentally damage paintings. So when I went to the shop later and saw a guy in the line in front of me, I told him he had to remove his backpack. He probably thought I was politely trying to rob him.

[allthingsshabbyandbeautiful-dea]

[vittyyluvscookies]

Am I wet? Am I on my period? Did I pee my pants?- next on wtf is going on down there.

[submissivefeminist]

I’m so glad this is a universal wondering among vagina-owners, haha.

[chaotichowlite]

‘Vagina-owners’

[anxiousnerd]

Tune in next time for: Are these menstrual cramps? Am I pregnant? Is it just gas? I wouldn’t have to ask these questions if I didn’t have a damn uterus

[sexylibrarian1]

Next week: Is it a bladder infection? An ovarian cyst? Do I have endometriosis? Oh God please do not let it be cervical cancer! A 20/20 special

[occupyvenus]

Y'all are forgetting the all-time classic: Is it just my period or is my appendix about to burst? Some nice tea and a heatpack or 911 and emergency surgery?

[phantoms-lair]

There is actually a test for that last one!

Place your hand over the pain, press down slightly and release. If the pain doesn’t change by any great margin, you’re fine. If it suddenly becomes some painful you can barely stand, Get thee to an Emergency Room

[taysweetbae]

reblog for the safety of vaginas and their owners

[greedyagain]

The appendix test works with or without a vagina so reblogging for everyone.

[foragecore]

some of u really need to make some jam…. plant some heirloom tomatoes…. sit in the dirt…. pet a sheep…. that’s all i’m saying

[art-no]

[gettingahealthybody-deactivated]

love

[mecharose]

why isn’t anyone allowed to be wrong anymore? it’s okay to be wrong. no one should be terrified of every tiny little mistake they might make. being wrong, and realizing you were wrong, is how you learn and grow and change.

[jennamarbles]

Treating My Dogs Like Babies For A Day