OMGWUT? D:

Writer, crafter, procrastinator, collector of quotes and other useless information. Veire on both DA and Toyhouse

[cyber-corp]

this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

[cyber-corp]

i know what i’m doing dw

[cyber-corp]

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

[cyber-corp]

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

[cyber-corp]

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

[cyber-corp]

desperately google searching for “greek gods to pray to when people notice your online idiocy”

[pluto-officially]

You're failing.

[cyber-corp]

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

[communist-mannyfesto]

Pluto is Roman, not Greek

[cyber-corp]

?????

[enigma-system03]

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

[cyber-corp]

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

[cyber-corp]

HE’S NOT EVEN REAL?????*

[cyber-corp]

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

[legionoftuna]

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

[cyber-corp]

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

[cyber-corp]

wrong.

[pointless-achievements]

Achievement Unlocked:

Lightning Bait

You're basically doing the post equivalent of standing out in a field during a storm with a ten-foot copper pole, you better hope Zeus is busy hiding from Hera.

[cyber-corp]

FUCK'S SAKE NOT AGAIN

[taco-bee]

I need you to name every greek God you know and what they are for plz

For science

[cyber-corp]

OKAY FINE HERE'S WHAT I'VE FOUND

HERMES: DA FUNNY ONE

ZEUS: DA LIGHTNING (NOTE: THOUGHT HE WAS NORDIC, FATHER OF THOR)

POSEIDON: DA SEA ONE

HEPHAESTUS: DA FIRE/FORGING/STEEL ONE

APHRODITE: DA HOT ONE

KRATOS: GOD OF WAR

HADES: DA HELL ONE. ROGUE LIKE

APOLLO: DA DODGEBALL/PROPHECY ONE

[boxxed-juice]

ares is the god of war, not kratos

[cyber-corp]

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE GAME CALL HIM GOD OF WAR THEN

[ironwoman359]

I can't believe this post is less than 24 hours old, it feels like something out of classic tumblr lore

[mysticalblue09]

It just keeps going. Hey op, would like a shovel to dig that grave a little bit faster?

[cyber-corp]

*yelling out from 12 foot hole* NO THANK YOU

[6qubed]

I'm personally offended that you didn't mention Hestia, given how many times I've mentioned her on this post alone, as well as the obvious fact that Hestia is Bestia™

[imsopopfly]

I’m absolutely DYING at the mix up between Zeus and Odin. Can you imagine those two switching places?

[cyber-corp]

MAN FUCJING WHATEVER. LIGHTNING BOYS

[whump-is-love-whump-is-life]

He’s so pretty… I want him to be grievously injured

[morally-earl-gray]

mfs be like "are you single or taken" and like technically im single but that implies that im availible, which i most definitely am not so yes im taken. im taken by me. you cant have me.

[dogposts]

My kitten (5mo) brings out the puppy in my senior beagle (13) (via)

[creekfiend]

Having seen some births now i can say that dog birth is amazing cos they just slip n slide out one after the other like a little conveyor belt. And theyre so little and unformed. And then UNGULATE BIRTHS ... are amazing for the opposite reason which is that 10mins after being born they are filing their taxes. Unless they are goats, in which case they are committing tax fraud instead

[creekfiend]

Goats are what is called a precocial species, which means that shortly after birth they are able to do many thimgs on their own, such as standing, walking, eating, and embezzlement

[dankmemeuniversity]

[dectech]

preperations for the long journey ahead, friend

[shyolet]

i know all about allistic people. they really love loud sudden noises and bad textures

[loki-zen]

dude it’s People With Allism

[zeitghost]

person who is trapped inside an allistic body here. i really like having no pressure on top of me and not being particularly interested in any one specific thing

[shyolet]

you are so brave for sharing your story 💜💜💜

[penny-anna]

A problem w being on tumblr is I'm completely desensitised to the urls you get on here. I'll send someone a link to a completely innocuous post I think they'll like & not until they're like 'what the fuck is this' do I notice that I've linked them to shreksbiggreencockandballs dot Tumblr dot com or smth. :/

[catgirlforeskin]

I think the urls here are fine

[cucheallaigh]

What the fuck

There is a f i s h

In my shrimp tank

I don’t keep any fish

How???? Did this happen????

[shrimp-propaganda]

you keep fish now sorry ❤

[beemovieerotica]

best way I have found to comfort people who are endlessly apologetic of things outside their control (often as a result of shitty relationships) is the jokingly hyperbolic accusation of [gasp] "so you're behind it all!"

like someone giving me directions who starts apologizing profusely when I miss a light as if it's their fault--[gasp] "it was you who petitioned city council to build this intersection in 1893!!" because it snaps them out of it and they laugh like. oh yeah. that's a ridiculous thing to blame someone for. I'm not that guy. you're not that guy. it works.

[thealphapigeon]

Celebrities need to use their celebrity status to be harmlessly weird more often. Enya lives in a castle and talks to nobody. Lady Gaga wore a dress made of actual raw meat one time. Whatever the fuck Robert Pattinson has going on

[thealphapigeon]

Whatever the hell Hideo Kojima is doing at any given time

[the-thought-emporium-imperial]

Have you seen the inside of Guillermo Del Toro’s house?

[thealphapigeon]

[theoreocat]

What are your pet’s favourite places?

[ruby-white-rabbit]

Pudding does not wish to be seen but wishes to remain warm

[mutantrenegade]

the way she talks like this is a childrens book is kinda giving me life

[urbanfantasyinspiration]

Pudding rejects the mortifying ordeal of being known

[homunculus-argument]

I wish rich people went back to keeping artists as pets. Like when you’re wealthy enough you pick a cool weirdo to do regular commissions for you, and if you really want to flex on your peers, you’ve got several.

 And you visit them every once in a while like “hello, I’ve paid for your rent and your tools, have you worked on that commission giant oil painting of me getting sucked off by my political opponent, who is unfortunately still the mayor of this town, like I requested?”

 And your favourite feral art person looks up - mouth full of gravel and completely surrounded by art-related trash like “no, but I designed a helicopter.”

And you’re like “that’s fucking lit, the mayor doesn’t have a helicopter. Please carry on as you have.”

[weonsinnombre]

[a-sweetheart-being-50-deactivat]

Saw this on FB. Soo funny!

[freakonaleashgurl2]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[bamababygirl-7]

😂🤣😂🤣OMG!!! I’m laughing sooooo hard right now.

[intoxicologist99]

[intoxicologist99]

@bamababygirl-7 @freakonaleashgurl2 I had to add these.

[r4cs0]

Omg it just kept going and going

[melancholic-bliss]

This is a world heritage post.

[tinderpodcast]

What is this? a crossover episode?

[hellonotabeaver]

My advice to you, run

[autumngracy]

Solution:

Tell Zeus you’ll agree to meet him but only if he’s in the guise of a swan (a very sexy swan)

Tell Odin you will arrive in the form of a swan

Give them the same meeting location, pop some popcorn and hide in the bushes

[brightlotusmoon]

Loki, is that you?

[animatedtext]