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Xuebing Du
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Kiana Khansmith
DEAR READER
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@weallreturntostardust
༄ Artfight ‘26 Graphics // Personal
･ ⟢ ⋮ Free to use, credit not required but appreciated. Reposts/Edits/Recolours/adding to Masterlists or hoards allowed. Please do not modify my work with AI.
IM SO EXCITEDDD FOR ARTFIGHT OMGGGGG!! Which team will you choose? Miami Dolphins vs Evil Intimidating Horse vs Fake Smile Girl!!!!
my Artfight!
in case you ever wanted to know what mambo number 5 sounds like with all the instruments (including the drums) replaced with bike horns
it sounds like the song is going to kill you and it’s perfect
i smiled through the whole thing because i just don’t understand what would compell someone to do this but thanks
If I don’t reblog this, just assume I’m dead.
Battle Against a Powerful Clown
I guess you could say he’s ve… he’s a very h…
i tried explaining to this girl at a party once how i could be gay and asexual at the same time and it basically boils down to never being into anyone but like once a year i’ll find a man attractive. and she was like “so what am i if i only like girls, and i’ve never found any of my boyfriends attractive and and i just wanna do cocaine all the time?” i was like “you’re a lesbian with a coke addiction?” and she was like “woooooah”. she broke up with her boyfriend that night and had a threesome with two girls in the bathtub. rebecca if you’re out there, i hope you’re going places. well, not far, since you’re electronically tagged. but spiritually.
The instinct when seeing some shit to say "who the hell put this on my dash" and then scrolling up to see beloved mutual's name and icon. And looking the other way peacefully.
the prince has begun practicing curtseying in the mirror. which could mean nothing.
we have good news and bad news, my liege. the good news is that we now know what that curtsying was about: you will be pleased to know that, after several heartfelt conversations between your child, the court jesters and a myriad of singing woodland creatures, you are now the parent of a proud and joyful new princess. the bad news is that, due to a series of events related to the dragon-sized hole in her bedchamber wall,
I love the insinuation that the second the princess realized she was a girl and thus actually a princess, the dragon was there. That thing wasted no time. It heard "princess" and was like "I need no further invitation, here I come."
Gender affirmed by Dragon. Amazing.
pretty sure you’re literally the only person who understood my vision on this accursed post
dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats
No, Mr. Horse, don’t worry, I certainly don’t have a Plinko down here! What I do have is this lovely cask of wine, specifically for horses, Amontillado in fact! Exquisite vintage.
I know you’re not supposed to be in this hospital, but if you’ll just follow me down this corridor—no, that’s not blood on the floor, it’s color theory, I’ll explain it later—I can bring you to this cask of wine that is certainly NOT a plinko machine—
I'm telling you, Blorbo, I have the finest copy of my shows in the basement, please follow me
we can take the Eeby Deeby - no, no, I promise it's not going to Gay Superhell - look, Eebders Deebeorg was an outlier adn should not have been counted
Where did I get this Eeby Deeby? Well, there was this lovely Middle Eastern gentleman who was selling copper, the finest copper—
hnnnnngg I’m trying to get blorbo into my plinko but the eeby deeby I bought from the copper merchant who as it turns out was EXTREMELY disreputable (who is he, to treat me with such contempt?!) is dummy thicc, thicc enough to block the Suez Canal in fact, and the eebert of the deebert is so scrimblo bimblo it keeps alerting the horse
yoU PLINKO BLORBO?! you plinko blorbo like the HORSE?! Oh, Eeby Deeby for Glup Shitto! Eeby Deeby for Glub Shitto for 1000 YEARS
“Eeby Deeby” is, in this case, putting an orange buttered cat face-first into a trashcan
my name is blorb and when its nite and eeby deeby castiel's flight poe and wine cause discourse
i'm ever given; i plink the horse
Historians are going to have to explain this culture someday.
game of the year 2026
ᔑリ||ℸ ̣⍑╎リ⊣ ʖ⚍ℸ ̣ ᔑ リ𝙹∷ᒲᔑꖎ ᓭ⍑╎∷ℸ ̣
This is yet another thing I thought Pratchett had made up but turned out to be totally real.
Unrelated but any time someone mentions clown makeup I'm reminded of how highly successful stage magician Penn Jillette almost flunked out of clown college and had to take remedial clown makeup classes.
My father was a magician and a clown. When he died, we cleared out his old clotehs and there was his clown suit.
"Oh I'll take this down to the charity shop" said my mother, missing hte part where no sane person is going to wear a clown suit.
"Nah" said I, "Have them dress him in it when they cremate him."
There was a pause and my throw-away joke started to slowly solidify into 'Yeah let's do that'.
A discussion was had with the mortician who had a bit of a worry that the costume would involve giant clown shoes which would prevent the coffin closing.
Luckily it wasn't that sort of outfit.
I told this to my dear friend who immediately envisaged someone trying to close a coffin onto a dead clown, only to have the big red nose go *Sad honk* every time there was an attempt to close the lid.
The awful hilarity rendered her incapable of standing.
The poor mortician can't figure out why it still won't close, and has to remove 5 dead clowns from the coffin before it finally shuts.
I’m convinced trickster deities and creatures exist, and that this is their typical profession.
why would a trickster deity become a mortician
Clown.
Never call me that again or I'll squirt you with my flower and honk my nose and I'll blow the house down
Whoever you are I adore you
sleep is stolen time. don't let them take it from you anymore. tonight. we are staying up. til one billion o clock.
but i stay silly! *←said in the most world-weary voice you ever did hear*
“but I stay silly!”
Reblog you stay silly
on it boss
guy who's having gauzy idealized wife flashbacks for the whole adventure but it turns out she isn't dead or anything he just really misses her and wants to get home
