I'm not sure what's going on by now but it's a lot

-20-she/they-nd- My every imperfection is an unbearable flaw. Your every doubt about me is a challenge I can't refuse.

[grippysockgang-deactivated20230]

You all are the coolest people I vaguely know

[tentacleteapot]

your unreliable narrator fucking bit me

[charl0ttan]

thats not how they told it

[the-rat12]

History is written by victors

[tentacleteapot]

yeah well Victor fucking bit me

[edgebug]

you'd think that "inhuman thing that isn't a person but speaks like a person and talking to it will slowly drive you mad" would only be found in folktales and fables and so on. but no. chatgpt

[catchymemes]

[tgirl-thucydides]

my parents trying to figure out what to get me for christmas

[zluty-spendlik]

Myslím, že čumblr ocení můj dárek pro maminku k Vánocům lol

🦎🦎🦎

[dragon-in-a-fez]

thinking about the time some terf dipshit on twitter said "you weirdos will be saying TREES are a social construct next" and I got nerdsniped and waded in like "trees ARE a social construct. there is no fundamental binary characteristic that separates trees from other plants" and well, I'll spare you the details but the conversation ended with the dipshit yelling "PALM TREES HAVE WOOD" which is hilarious because "wood" actually does have a pretty unambiguous, binary definition and palms in fact do not qualify

[birdsareblooming]

sometimes i feel like im climing up this incline again alone but thankully sisypus and the itsy bitsy spider and here with me

[birdsareblooming]

holy shit is that kate bush

[neolxzr]

guys its working keep posting cringe we really can keep them out

[aquilacalvitium]

Okay fuck it if this post reaches 666k notes by the end of 2023 I'll practise basic self care

Why 666k? Because it's funny and impossible so good fucking luck

[lizluvscupcakes]

Well, OP, I’m officially invested in this shit. Your whiny ass is doing self care if I have to drive to your goddamn house and do it for you.

[aquilacalvitium]

By Talos this can't be happening

[oysters-aint-for-me]

reblog this everyone i wanna see what happens when op’s reverse-hubris forces them to practice basic self care.

why? because it’s funny and completely possible actually so good fucking luck op

[tungsten-moon]

I figured out roughly how many notes it's been getting per day and multiplied that by the number of days left until the end of 2023

If we keep it going at this rate we'll be far past 666k

[aquilacalvitium]

IMPORTANT

Okay so clearly I've underestimated y'all

So how about we make this more interesting?

I will practise self care if this post reaches 666k BY THE END OF 2022

[moonlarking]

Op you have fuckethed with the devil this post has gained 30,000 notes since I reblogged it last night

[catgirlcaliphate]

OP I hope you are ready to practice some self care because if there's one thing the gremlins of tumblr love it's a challenge.

[cassianandfenrysaremyboyos]

I am consuming a media and you are going to hear about it

[lu-sn]

and the thrilling sequel: i consumed a media months ago and you are still hearing about it

[freenarnian]

and the cautionary conclusion: the media has consumed me

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

Okay legally I have to try this rainbow goo, right?

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

It seems to be trying to fill a similar ecological niche to jelly so I got waffles to eat it on

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

I swear to fuck, y'all, this stuff smells like children's shampoo

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

Well okay let's do this

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

The flavor is indescribable. It's like if you wanted to make lemon preserves but your only knowledge of lemons came from Saturday morning cartoon advertising. This is lemon as seen through the lens of Dr. Wondertainment of SCP fame and I'm pretty sure it fell through a rip in spacetime from their employee cafeteria. It's !!LEMON!! (with a strong aftertaste of artificial coloring and plastic from the edible glitter bits)

The texture is exactly how I always imagined it would be to eat aloe vera gel out of the brightly-colored bottle in my mom's bathroom

Overall 6/10, I'm gonna finish the waffle but fuck knows what I'm gonna do with the rest of the bottle

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

Update my tummy hurts

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

I assure you these plastics were very macro

[fruitblush]

“After placing Laika in the container and before closing the hatch, we kissed her nose and wished her bon voyage, knowing that she would not survive the flight.”

Prints

[valtsv]

character in a fight scene: *restrains their opponent by pinning them against the wall by their wrists*

me:

[icantwritegood]

character in a fight scene: *pins their opponent down by straddling their waist and holding their wrists to the floor*

me:

[ladylike-foxes]

character in a fight scene: *lifting their disarmed opponent’s chin slightly with the business end of their weapon*

me:

[g3ncyho3]

character in fight scene: *pins down the opponent and leans in close to whisper in their ear*

me:

[breyito]

character in fight scene: *restrains the opponent by twisting their arm/s behind their back and pinning them to the wall chest first with their own chest pressing against the opponents back*

me:

[abandoned-as-mustard]

Character: *distracts their otherwise equally good/better opponent by flirting*

Me:

[bmarvels]

Character in fighting scene: *restrains opponents arms in a lock hold with their own, entangling their arms together forcing their bodies to be pressed together and faces in close proximity*

[lime-on-my-side]

character in fight scene: *holds opponent by the collar, lifts them and brings them close to their face*

me:

[miqojak]

Every time this crosses my dash it gets better.

[murderonthedullexpress]

characters in fight scene: *tussle then break apart and warily watch each other while breathing hard*

me:

[dealwithwarlords]

Character in a fight scene: *steps with only one leg between the legs of the opponent that’s lying on the floor*

Me:

Character in a fight scene: *dives on their opponent to knock them out of the way of something that could have killed them and they both sit their out of breath, staring at each other, one on top of the other*

[superlemonsweet]

Character in a Fight Scene: *kicks one their opponent’s legs from behind forcing them to kneel before them*

Me:

[oh-great-authoress]

Character in a Fight Scene: *is pinned down by by their opponent, but then distracts them and flips them both over, so their opponent is now the one pinned down*

Me:

Character in a Fight Scene: *breathing heavily, wiping away blood from their mouth as they look mildly impressed at their opponent*

Me:

[i-am-1142-deactivated20240508]

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

[finndamerons-archive]

castle // halsey

[ezraroach]

There’s only two genres of dogs in medieval paintings and they look like this

[secretspecialname]

Muži řeknou "dítě potřebuje mužský vzor" a pak se chovaj jak kreténi.

[greelin]

COUNT dracula? ok. one lol