if shit sucks, hit da bricks

but I am apparently a foul temptress //// 2?, she/her, another year still queer

[prasinoutsikos]

you will look at my one painting. it’s 1914

[tiifu-ndovu]

[pixlerelish]

My toxic trait is that no matter what I need three hours to myself at the end of the day to do absolutely nothing.

[maidslime]

My cat pulled the books off my bookshelf so he could sleep on the shelf???

[sentientsky]

characters going “we were lovers once”: eh, it’s okay i guess. it’s nice enough

characters going “we were friends once”: absolutely devastating. one hit knockout i’m gone

[zoppzoop]

getting violently ill btw

[victusinveritas]

[naamahdarling]

WTF this is masterful, 10/10.

[marjorierose]

Other people have said this in notes, but the Bulwer-Lytton contest involves writing the most absurd opener you can think of and submitting it to the contest. It's not a judgment like the Razzies or the bad sex in books award or something; it's a game. Diana Murtaugh of Baltimore is to be congratulated for this win.

[ineffable-gallimaufry]

can't access the wiki for taz on my phone for some reason but. i was looking at merles page and it was so fucking funny because there was a section about how he died each time that happened and the list was just

killed by john

killed by john

killed by john

killed by john

killed by john (more detail on why that was)

turned into a rock that one time

[totallyabsurd]

This is not even an exaggeration

[nongunktional]

if youve ever written a fight scene longer than like 300 words you'll have quickly discovered that there's a finite number of words to describe a Hit and 90% of your brainpower and wordhippo searches will be dedicated to squeezing out new ones

[nongunktional]

i think have to is a strong word but carry on i guess

[minovskyy]

you have to.

[ex-libris-craux]

writing combat 🤝 writing smut

there has GOT to be another word for that

[anasabdin]

soft permisson

[were--ralph]

imagine being born with two bootyholes and meeting your soulmate who has two dicks

[nerdintheforest]

Every day I log on to this hellsite and have to read things with my own two eyes

[were--ralph]

this feels very tame for me to be honest

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

two eyes you say??

[wathav]

Most male marsupials, except for macropods and marsupial moles, have a bifurcated penis, separated into two columns, so that the penis has two ends corresponding to the females' two vaginas. The penis is used only during copulation, and is separate from the urinary tract. It curves forward when erect, and when not erect, it is retracted into the body in an S-shaped curve.

Female marsupials have two lateral vaginas, which lead to separate uteri, both accessed through the same orifice. A third canal, the median vagina, is used for birth.

[were--ralph]

every day on this site you learn something new

[eliyahu613]

this tweet. but for tumblr

[dashaibo]

And what, pray tell, is so wrong with that? Must a king lower himself to the vocabulary of insects? Must an academiac explain his reasoning to kindergartners? There is no shame in knowledge nor is there in verbosity. Quite the opposite, they are to be celebrated. But I guess this is the world we are forced to inhabit. This world... This planet, teeming with life and all its infinite possibilities. And you would dare dilute it, so that a simpleton's mind could comprehend it? I will not stand for this. No more shall a man be judged for his might, his ambition, his intellect. No more shall we look down on those who propose a mere thought experiment about owning a human pec9sdjv0 c9i2ewokhndvoi adsjvci uwqeowdsxujvnli ufdsiuljfcniu ofeidcvjpc9nUIODSuljvniuwqopisafjvp985erioewaudJHB9jrg8frjuv8ar9jvuw08rd9vujq35g89spdujigk[0e9ravjik0rvu9jq54w8yvh r8og;af9ukjgmoiaelgurj9g8zboifyhvlo8fivujawp89 OC:Ivjare0sd9oizl

[semicolonthefifth]

Please leave the mall, you're making a scene.

[dashaibo]

You won't... Keep me... from Hot Topic... forever...

[etiennelux]

the ideal chai latte is one of the most amazing things on this earth. it’s a shame that most cafes think they have to serve either a cup of grit or milk that they whispered the names of spices to

[cock-holliday]

Idk man it’s so easy to get bogged down in all the bullshit online but when my then-6 year old cousin found out I was trans he said “ok” then corrected my grandma when she misgendered me. I was once the third between a gay man and a lesbian. Two lesbians once invited me back to their place when I presented as a man. I met an AMAB nb butch who looked strikingly to outsiders like a cis man and it was one of the more sapphic experiences I’ve had. I nervously wore a boydyke shirt to pride and got 3 different cis-looking femme folks tell me they loved my shirt. I once told a trans group at a protest that any pronouns were fine for me and one person said “wow, I’m impressed and intimidated by people like that. I don’t know that I could be that chill with pronouns.” I once told a GNC friend I wished I could wear a type of “opposite” gender clothing after I had already transitioned and so it would be associated with my AGAB and he said “You could just do it.” I’ve had cishet men fight cops for me before. The first time I had a doctor ask me if my name was different than what was on my forms I had to try not to cry. Last week, a phone call with a doctor’s office where I am generally cis passing asked unprompted if my name listed is what I want to be called. It touched me then too. I told a lesbian friend once I felt like my attraction to men AND women both felt gay. She said “makes sense.” And we moved on. I go by different pronouns in different circles. I’ve had gay women love my facial hair. I’ve had gay men like my tits. It’s all out there, I promise. It can be hard to find it but I promise there is community like you and community who likes you. And it’s more messy and beautiful than tumblr discourse makes it out to be.

[cock-holliday]

These are from the last 8 hours only. And not all of them.

We're here! We're here we're here we're here!

Check the notes! There are so many of us and so many who love us.

Queer love, baby!

[the-haiku-bot]

Check the notes! There are

so many of us and so

many who love us.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[botanyshitposts]

love doing something I call ‘the big leaf test’ where I put my hand on a leaf and if the leaf is bigger than my hand I go damn that’s crazy

[omnybus]

[jcams88]

@penandinkprincess

Spaghetti escapes the tank and tries to make breakfast for his new dad who is currently horrified and silently screaming

[phlebasthebroenician]

Yahoooooooooo!!!!

[bugwars]

It is imperative that the customer remain unaware that employees drink water, it frightens and scares them to think of an employee as having human needs