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wizard0rb

should i post the walmart comic

or should i simply wait

wizard0rb

If no one responds then I will have no choice

wizard0rb

one sec

wizard0rb

here it is. the surreal horror walmart comic i made in eighth(?) grade.

one-time-i-dreamt

A girl I liked convinced me to stab a man, so I did. Felt guilty for a bit, then promptly forgot about it and walked around with the murder weapon for a couple of hours, going about my business, walking my dog. Eventually I was cornered by a plainclothes police officer who asked me why I had a bloody knife; I told him I was looking after it for my bogan cousin. He said, “You’re under arrest,” and I was like,, “No, I’m not, watch this,” and then I woke up.

renrumm

that’s a goddamned power move

carbonfiberpersonality

depsidase

guerrillatech

florida boy

teathattast

deleteduser-mchnsthnk-deactivat

stagerevolution

the night vale twitter confuses me so much though

cuz sometimes its like

or its like

but then sometimes it just

tchaikovskaya

sometimes its just like *street lights reflecting off the wet asphalt at night* maybe life isnt so ugly after all

miss-chicken

muppethole-deactivated20240312

these three scenes in Airplane! come one right after another and together they form the most lethal sequence in cinema history

memeufacturing-deactivated20161

mockwa

tamagotchi

I was playing Fraiser with my sister and I tried to swipe the image away, but it just made a smaller version in the corner that zoomed in and out correlation with the pic

footberry-deactivated20220703

what does playing fraiser mean

tamagotchi

Whenever we go out at night we bring up this pic of him , turn up the brightness all the way, and hold ur phone up to the window at stop lights to see people reactions, it’s great

veeranger

bought a hoodie that amusingly has the coordinates for tokyo on it so when aliens abduct me they’ll think it’s like when a dog has an address on its collar and drop me off in tokyo when they’re done fucking me

veeranger

the reviews are in

aberrantemotion

Comp of my favourite guns

please add on this is fucking wild

You know what this does.

this is called a punt gun. IT WAS USED TO HUNT ENTIRE FLOCKS OF DUCKS AT A TIME.

what’s that? you wish you didnt need to dispose of the body? WELL WHY DON’T YOU GET A FUCKING NINE BARELLED SHOTGUN YOU’LL BREAK YOUR ARM BUT YOUR VICTIM WILL BE RED MIST.

Give this to your party in the next dnd campaign. It’s called an apache revolver and every single fucking class can specialize in it.

You know how in a cartoon a gun will bend, and it shoots that direction? Well this fuck decided to create a gun like that, designed to shoot around corners.

This is called a PARASCOPE, gun. LITERALLY DESIGNED SO YOU DON’T POKE YOUR HEAD OUT OF THE TRENCHES.

“this isn’t even a gun?” NO IT IS. IT’S CALLED A POCKETKNIFE PISTOL AND WAS MADE FOR HOME DEFENSE. (on a side note we should still make these and have these be the only guns “for self defense” correct me if im wrong.)

“this is a mace?”

NO DUDE THIS WAS CALLED KING HENRYS WALKING STICK, AND WAS OWNED BY HIM. IT HAS THREE SMALL HOLES ON THE MACE THAT SHOOT.

take a wild fucking guess how you fire it. JUST GUESS.

YES. THE GUN IS FIRED BY FUCKING PUNCHING.

THIS IS A FUCKING RING. IT FITS AROUND YOUR FINGER. AND IT’S A GUN. A SIX SHOT GUN

“well that’s an odd frame for a gun.”

YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE IT WAS DESIGNED TO REPLACE YOUR BICYCLE FRAME. The reason these were made, was because before the automobile, the best way to transport your gun was on bike. SO WHY NOT HAVE YOUR GUN, BE THE BIKE

Yes. THIS IS DESIGNED TO LOOK LIKE LIPSTICK. IT’S AS BIG AS ONE TOO. I DON’T KNOW IF THESE ARE STILL LEGAL, BUT GALS, THIS COULD BE A GREAT THING TO CARRY WITH YOU.

You see this rifle? IT CAN DESTROY TANKS. AND YES, THIS BADASS MANAGED TO PERFECTLY HANDLE IT’S WEIGHT.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=11&v=nKDtpbLx-XM

YOU SEE THIS GUN? IT’S CALLED A SMART GUN. THE ONLY WAY TO FIRE IT IS TO HAVE YOUR FINGERPRINT SCANNED, AND TO BE WEARING THE WATCH THAT COMES WITH IT. NOW THERE IS LITERALLY NO EXCUSE FOR KIDS TAKING THEIR PARENTS GUNS.

YEAH, THIS IS A PEN. For when a writers done with your shit.

This is called a vomit gun. and you’re right! this doesn’t fire bullets. INSTEAD, THIS BITCH SHOOTS A LED LIGHT THATS SO BRIGHT, AND DISORIENTING, THAT IT LITERALLY CAUSES YOU TO VOMIT, FALL OVER FROM INTENSE DIZZINESS, AND BLIND THEM. IT ALSO EMITS PULSES TO DISORIENT THEM, AND HAS A VARIETY OF EFFECTS THAT REALLY FUCK YOU UP. (the effectiveness and everything about it is being questioned, but it IS bright enough to blind you.)

this isn’t a special ammo shotgun.

it’s a grenade launcher.

this is exactly what you think it is.

30 barrel revolver. What the fuck can I think of for witty commentary. Just look at it.

HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO END THIS.

pipebomb-malewife-deactivated20

This is so Fucking funny

teathattast

mysillycomics

shadowdragonia

Gonna say it again, my bros ex (while they were still dating) gave me her betta that she had kept in a tiny tank that wasn’t even meant for fish, it was some sort of desk fountain, but its a betta so she thought “he doesn’t need a lot of space, he’s fine”. I put that little guy in a 5 gallon tank and he was like a totally different fish. He went from just basically floating in one spot to swimming all over his new tank. He suddenly was more alert and paid attention when I was in the room, I could see him following me back and forth in his tank. He just seemed like a genuinely happier fish, even looked prettier after a few weeks, healthy.

So yeah, fuck the tiny tanks bs people push for bettas. Give those babies space to release their awesome personality for you.

lonely-canadian-shrimp-universe

we had a betta and we got a 10 gallon tank for him and a couple guppies and mollies and the second we put him in there he was sO EXCITED YALL

Like have you ever seen a fish play? because until that day I hadn’t. we had a cool bubble machine and a current in the tank to cycle the water around yknow. well this lil dude would either

swim to the bottom where the bubbles came from and ride the bubbles up to the top, go back down and then do it again and again and again

or

go to the side of the tank that the current came from and go right up to the top, where the current was strongest, and ride the current across the tank. he’d repeat that again and again

seriously guys domestic Bettas LOVE to swim and love the space! give them plants and they’ll pop up in and around them all day long.

holiest-child

I had the exact same experience! We either gave our Betta a 10 or 20 gallon tank and honestly until that day I didn’t know a fish could have a personality. This fish LOVED going under the bubbles from the filter and riding down over and over again. They will appreciate the space and plants, and sometimes even some fellow fish friends who get along with Bettas.

anachronic-cobra

We had a betta in a big tank that would come up and rub against your hand if you touched the top of the water, it was precious

blackqueerblog

Am i the only one taking notes just in case?

bluelivesaintshit

Americans joke about living in a cyperpunk dystopia but chinese protesters are going 1for1 with censor bots in order to spread info, engineering anti facial recognition solutions daily, and running pop up resistance bases out of ghost towns we will never be on that level here lmao

beebugger

International outrage is important. We’ll never survive our totalitarian governments if we don’t help each other, regardless of culture.

let-fred-live

News update! A student (20 years old) has recently been arrested for buying these laser pens, on the account of them being an offensive weapon, claiming that they set things on fire.

Now, there’s a nightly tourist attraction that uses these lasers, sized up multiple times. There is nothing inherently offensive or dangerous about these tiny laser pens, mainly used for stargazing.

So what do the people do?

They come out, to the planetarium (another popular use for these lasers) and they all shine a spectacular laser show to:

1). show their dissatisfaction for baseless arrests

2). display that there’s nothing dangerous about these lasers

3). they try to set the entire planetarium on fire with the very vicious glare of multiple lasers (it did not work)

4). also to satisfy the urge to shine a flashlight at a planetarium and make shadow dogs out of their hands

5). they’ve also turned it into an impromptu disco with song requests being taken, neon beachballs being tossed around, a public karaoke session

6). They also attempt to set a newspaper on fire via the sheer offensive firepower of multiple lasers singled upon one target. Newsflash, it didn’t work.