Snrub

Leonardo is the kinkiest Turtle.

[toss-a-coin-to-your-stan-account]

fucking love when I'm on a call with someone and they start to do a little errand or go somewhere else and they say "and you're coming with me" like. absolutely I am let's go on an adventure I've been spirited away

[void-enthusiasts]

why must it always be 'peppering'. why can't i salt my lover with kisses. paprika my lover with kisses. 3 tablespoons chili powder 2 teaspoons ground cumin 1/2 teaspoons oregano my lover with kisses

[todayiwrotenothing]

Yeah why can't I cumin my lover

[cannibalchicken]

[yellowmonday-deactivated2022120]

i think janitor should be the highest paying job in a society

[c3po]

flipping burgers is one of the most honourable professions u can be in. literally everyone likes burgers

[caustic-krana]

[prohaloplayer-deactivated202601]

they haven't taken a picture better than this which is kinda crazy if you think about it

[charaznablescanontoyota]

words of wisdom from wikipedia this evening

[wahtdahel-blog]

[chemicalheart-deactivated202009]

that last line is absolutely phenomenal is this why yall are so keen on therapy??

[that-house]

i have a terrible habit of sometimes just doing 100 squats in the shower. It’s right on the intersection of “hard enough it’ll fuck me up tomorrow” and “easy enough to be done on a whim” and i always regret it

[that-house]

See part of the issue is when i shower i look at my legs (which are like if a pair of festive christmas hams were solid muscle) and then i remember “oh yeah i can do 100 squats like nothing”

[that-house]

The process:

Woah my legs are jacked

*does a squat to grab shampoo*

Hey what was that

One squat is BASICALLY 5 squats. like just do it a few more times without really noticing and bam! 5 squats

Might as well do 5 more that’s an even 10

That wasn’t so hard

Make it 20

5 more to a nice round 25

Hey that’s a fourth of 100

We can do that again. Let’s take a quick break and do the next set

Ok that’s 50

That’s probably enough

Oops 75

Well now I can’t NOT do 100

Fuck

Fuck

Ow

Fuck

100

[that-house]

hot. next question

[flagellant]

"I don't like the Jack Harkness test because it means it's okay to fuck Scooby Doo"

yes that's the entire damn point of the Harkness test. The Harkness Test doesn't exist to say you have to fuck Scooby Doo. The Harkness Test exists to say that it is morally/ethically fine for someone to want to fuck Scooby Doo, because Scooby Doo can give informed consent and communicate as such.

the reason you don't like it is because none of you are self-aware enough to realize how incredibly fucking puritan all of you are when it comes to fucking

[sethprotector]

Tumblr being free is humanity's greatest error.

[flagellant]

Then pay me 20$ if you feel so strongly about it

[rorytelling]

[afloweroutofstone]

They closed the Death Wendy's over a year ago and I'm still mad about it. It was a Wendy's located in the middle of a six-way intersection, requiring many pedestrians to cross the street 3 times in a row in order to get to it

It was one of the city's top ten spots for car crashes, multiple people died there, and the service was terrible. I miss it dearly

[pretendusername-deactivated2021]

Happy plagueiversary

[quantumshade]

[1percentcharge]

I like it when songs do that thing where the chorus changes to get more upset or incensed each time

[1percentcharge]

When it comes to music I am still an 11 year old who still thinks it’s cool when people curse

[catchymemes]

[typewriterchan]

feelin seriously called out here

[justclownin]

[detectivehole]

not to sound like your dad but if your not having a great time rn you might legitimately be playing too many video games or being on that damn phone too often, or at least without any necessary activity buffers

[detectivehole]

may i suggest coloring with physical materials? or some chores you’ve been putting off? hell go outside with a bucket and make mud soup like you’re five again. take a break. you can bring your whatever for music and stuff but like don’t play with it

[benihana-circumcision]

lots of huffy teenagers in the notes

[anarch0possum]

i mean this, after spending so long getting my entertainment online, theres something incredibly tranquil about shutting it all out for a while to do something in meatspace for myself

[i-am-dulaman]

The best thing about new zealand english is we get to pick and choose what we like from american english and british english.

The bad thing is that sometimes we choose wrong.

Like. Americans have fries and chips vs brits have chips and crisps. Both valid.

Here? We have chips and chips.

Youd think it'd be fine and that you can figure out which one a person is talking about from context but trust me a good percentage of the time you cannot. And often the person will try to differentiate them by clarifying they meant "Potato chips" only for them to realise a second later that both chips are made from potatoes

[theequeerstrian]

I shouldn't make fun but that last part is DEEPLY hilarious to me