sweet, sweet escapism @winniebread - Tumblr Blog

Posts

shortbreads-deactivated20241127

thefeelofavideogame

a mummy who broke out of his sarcophagus wrote this

tamascotchi-deactivated20190101

reblog if ur a striminal

robotsandramblings

#YOU’VE BEEN HIT BY #YOU’VE BEEN STRUCK BY #A SMOOTH STRIMINAL

pokemonprofessor

nice.

furikomaru-deactivated20190920

I am so embarrassed that only 31% of us have the good sense to lie when someone asks if we’ve committed a crime.

thecollectibles

Fairy Collection by Romain MAZEVET

cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024

when observed, are you. . .

a wave?

a particle?

Voting ended onMay 19, 2023

cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024

oh my god you're so right

cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024

#50/50

gingerhastoomanyobsessions

this was funnier in my head

urbanfantasyinspiration

Then you must be in hysterics

lethalbutterfly

evilnicegirl

middle schooler obsessed with using perfect grammar online -> adult who uses like every text abbreviation possible

kazoracht

Master the rules then grow beyond them obviously

captainsblogsupplemental

obi-waankenobi

#i like to think data took him all the way to the brig tossed him in and left#and then came back 60 seconds later and was like ‘i believe i have successfully played a ‘practical joke’ on you :)’#riker loses it & claps him on the back like ‘wow. good job u rly had me going. dont ever fucking do that again’ Perfect.

ingridverse

Actually it’s 73 seconds. Data, knowing something of how human minds work, estimates that Riker will give him 60 seconds to come back (because humans prefer “round numbers”, however arbitrary the units). After 60 seconds it will take 4 seconds for Riker to fully process the conclusion that Data is, in fact, not coming back after all, and an additional 9 seconds to build to the optimum level of anxiety.

After all, comedy is timing.

sniperct

swampgallows

does anyone take antidepressants anymore? i feel like everyone i knew that took ssris just takes adderall now

#thats weird because i switched from adderall to welbutrin

microsff

"I want," the man said to the art robot, and then described an image in some detail. "Certainly," said the art robot. A printout came out of its chest. "Thank y- Hey! What's this?" "A list of artists who make images of the kind you describe, and who are accepting commissions."

yay855

This is a horror story to a techbro and a feel-good comedy to anyone with a sense of human decency.

biggaybunny

I know it's been talked about before but I still don't think it's been emphasized how *fucked* today's internet experience is for children. I didn't know what the word "discourse" was when I was 8, or 10, or even 13. I was too busy playing the nigh-limitless amount of flash games out there on the internet and making sure my neopets were fed. Like I cannot stress enough that if I had free time on the computer, 9 times out of 10 I could go and play a jaunty little game someone had whipped up and put out there for no other reason than that creating games was awesome and easy to do. Or go to some page that existed just to collect memes; you see back then there were more than 4 sites, and you didn't need accounts to visit them. I didn't get targeted ads. I wasn't exposed to any sort of political ideology. I spent a lot of time on the computer but no one site monopolized my time or tried to fucking manipulate me into using it more. The internet was for more than one thing back then, and honestly I don't think enough people realize how much has been stolen from us.

mima-sama

I understand the feelings of despair, but the rest of the internet is still very much out there. There’s a growing and dedicated movement to take it back from corporations. I’ll link a few of the neat little websites I’ve found on Neocities and in various other places. https://sadgrl.online/ - A good jumping-off point that has html guides, links to webrings, and other cool stuff.

https://deathgenerator.com - You ever wanted to make one of those funny fake video game screenshots, but you don’t have the patience to do the image editing? Well, here you go!

https://signal.vercel.app/edit - A neat little free online midi editor! You can upload midi files or compose your own!

https://dan-ball.jp/en/javagame/dust/ - A cool falling-sand-type game. The website it’s hosted on is full of other cool games, most of which are free and don’t require flash (rip flash)

https://webshark.neocities.org/gamepages - Speaking of games that don’t require flash, here’s a whole page of ‘em. Most are fairly simple, but they’re still a lot of fun.

https://ocremix.org/ and https://vgmusic.com/ - Two websites that have been around since almost forever. OCRemix is home to video game music remixes, and VGMusic has a MASSIVE library of video game midis! I used to spend a lot of time on VGMusic in particular when I was a kid.

https://cooltext.com/ - You can make cool-looking text! They also have free fonts you can download.

And this is by no means a comprehensive list, no. This is just a sampling. There’s so much out there just waiting to be discovered-- you just have to go looking for it! (And remember, kids, be careful out there-- computer viruses and malware are still very much a threat, so I encourage you to get uBlock Origin or NoScript-- or both-- for your web browser before you start web surfing! Also never give out any personal information! And for the love of all that is good, and for your own safety, please stay away from the porn sites if you’re under the age of 18.)

Have fun, stay safe, and

garcavisconde

HEY KIDS, YOU WANT MORE GAMES? ITCH.IO HAS PLENTY OF WEIRD GAMES YOU CAN PLAY ON YOUR BROWSER OR DOWNLOAD ON YOU COMPUTER. Just remember to always check tags and description to avoid finding things that are for a much older audience.

funkylittlebats

There's also special browsers like NuMuKi that you can still play old flash games on!!!

brendering

kaiasky

🍓 daughter-of-sapph0 Follow

op link the fucking article

⚪ fxckhaus Follow

https://www.sbnation.com/a/17776-football enjoy reading about football :)

Something is terribly wrong. Something is terribly wrong. Something is terribly wrong. Something is terribly wrong.

🍓 daughter-of-sapph0 Follow

thanks. what the fuck

[x], desc in alt

charlataninred

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

meraarts

Might I add:

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child

The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

eater-of-hopes-and-dreams

The adventures of a space roomba

Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)

I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head

blitzlowin

hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):

The God of Arepo (graphic novel 1 / 2 / 3) (ebook)

The Monster of Sentan

The Witch’s Cat

Raise Both Children

Stabby the Roomba (honorable mention)

Cinderella Marries the Prince (comic)

My Arch Nemesis Cynthia

Pirates and Mermaid

Eindred and the Witch

The Demon King

The Cornerwitch

Grandmother Beetroot

Apocalypse Daycare Worker

Grandmother Accidentally Summons a Demon

New Year Saga

A Story About Changelings

Ranger in the King’s Forest

The Difference Between a Hare and a Rabbit

Goblin Men (Canines)

charlataninred

I am in love with you /p

inkvoices

Adding Faceblind Prince Charming and Cinderella

inkvoices

21. The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

22. The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

lightningladybug

adding the Doctors Without Borders one

inkvoices

I LOVE tumblr storytime, so here’s a bunch more your weekend reading. Enjoy!

24. The Queen with Three Cursed Children

25. Tiny Dragon with one coin hoard

26. Haunted house

27. Shark hero was about to go rogue

28. Grandma lives in the woods comic

29. A Different Aftermath comic

30. Battery (microstory but I love it so much)

31. It’s A Date comic

32. Supervillian kidnaps rival’s kid and they want to stay

33. Narrative Town

34. I have been hired to clean the wizard tower comic

35. Robot Apocalypse

36. The Statues That Do Not Weather

37. Kushiel

38. Tooth Fairy

39. Alien abduction

40. Felonious wish-granting

41. When humans met actual space orcs

42. Space cousins

dannnnnnnnnnnnex

WAIT REBLOG THIS VERSION INSTEAD

kronkk

"Genuine" Leather does not label that the leather is real, it is a quality descriptor. It is low quality leather, it just sounds nice because it says genuine and that word has connotations but it is not.

If you want nice leather that lasts, look for "top grain" or "full grain" quality

kronkk

GENUINE LEATHER IS THE LOWEST QUALITY OF LEATHER. IT IS NOT TELLING THAT YOU THE LEATHER IS REAL

and vegan leather is plastic

back-not-broken

Ok I have to add this diagram cause I was still so confused every time I saw your post as to whether it was still real leather or fake leather.

Yes, it is still real, aka genuine leather. Just shittier than other real leathers.

kronkk

Yes! So I mean like people hear genuine leather and they think that means oh! Real leather! This is good! But then it's not good, it's a quality indicator of the [real] leather

#as someone who loves leather this is really helpful

tearsovercaprisuns-deactivated2

how is the kentucky derby not trending on here?? the horse with the lowest odds wins and immediately starts biting everything in its sight, that sounds like a tumblr legend to me

sneakyspades

oh my fucking god

phantom-cosmos

This horse wasn’t even supposed to be in the race. Horse number 20 (can’t remember it’s name) dropped out the day before for whatever reason, and Rich Strike was just barely able to sneak a spot into the derby before the deadline. Not to mention that this was just some garbage $30,000 horse that didn’t have any kind of impressive breeding (yes I am aware $30k is still a lot, but for a Kentucky Derby horse, that’s chump change). He was the second biggest upset in the history of the Derby, with one other horse (Donerail) winning with 91-1 odds before in 1913 (Which, for reference, I’m pretty sure Donerail with his 91-1 odds still holds the record for the worst odds in the history of the race. Just for context of how shit Rich Strike’s 80-1 odds were. Not THE worst, but definitely up there).

I am in love with this shit horse who wasn’t even supposed to be there, had some of the worst odds in the history of the race, and had the worst starting position who completely destroyed all of the favorites to win. Watching him come up to first right at the last second was THRILLING.

jackhawksmoor

This story is fucking hilarious

So Rich Strike has barely won a race, but he ALWAYS shoots up in the last stretch. He goes from 11th to 4th, from 8th to 3rd. Rich Strike hits the final corner and suddenly gets flashbacks to his previous life as a Klingon warrior. He starts snarling curses and heads for the finish line like it insulted his ancestors and must PAY, that's just how he runs races

And this was a blisteringly fast time for the Kentucky Derby- one of the fastest races EVER. When the announcer realized the time when they hit the halfway point he was like "Jesus CHRIST" It was incredible. Which means the lead horses, the favorites, were sprinting as hard as they could the entire race. By the time they got to the end they were exhausted

And here comes Rich Strike, turns the last corner and his vision goes red. The lead horses can't pick up the final sprint like usual- they already ARE going flat out. Rich Strike comes up on the inside, NOT exhausted by fighting for the lead spot, howling "DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR" like the complete fucking lunatic he is and just blows past everyone

He's ready to kill. He wants to tear into some Romulans and destroy the Federation, and he wins everything

Then the guy on horseback whose job it is to help slow the running horses down after they cross the finish line comes up and Rich Strike LOSES HIS SHIT

He bites the other horse, he bites the rider, he bites himself. He's like "oh you think you can slow ME down?! I'LL KILL YOU. QAPLA!"

He's completely insane and I love him

thesylverlining

Hail to the KING. I watched this happen on TV last year, Best shit i have ever seen and the only time I have cared about the Kentucky derby.

He screams out of nowhere with the fires of hell at his hooves, and the audience started BOOING THIS HORSE as he went to collect his roses. A thousand rich fucks mad as hell, hating the guts of this insane rando who has ruined their party. Huge Lokasenna energy (look this up lol).