Local EldRAWR X3

When will my Vampire AU romance return from the AU? 30+/village elder/Taurus/Queer AF (Asexual, Panromantic, Poly, Voidgender idgaf pronouns) My soul was probably born from a butt bc I am The Shit. ♡Hail Satan and Subscrybe Babey♡

[x-h3kk3ning-x]

°•☆Man will never truly be free, until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest.°•☆ :3

[gemhunter178]

Stardew Valley - Travelling Merchant's Pig

I've thought of doing the travelling cart from Stardew Valley for some time now...I didn't have the time this week, but here's the pig that accompanies them

Happy Fan Art Friday, everyone

[saltedbruises]

"Oswald doesn't love me, even if he did it's not as if I love hi- " panic attack commences

[cannibalchicken]

[zluty-spendlik]

[geeseareassholes]

[lamignonette]

[brenni-murasaki]

[mysticmuse0]

[kragehund-est]

the only thing stronger than the gastric distress i get from eating cherries is my love for eating cherries

[inwardhardar]

[kragehund-est]

what

[inwardhardar]

[kragehund-est]

thank you. im once again reminded why i love tumblr because where else could i get content like this

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

[lesbianshepard]

waaaay back when I was a cashier in retail we would talk about dumb shit while unloading the truck, and we got to the "what would you do in a zombie apocalypse" me and another worker were like yeah we would just die. End it all, we can't fight or run or shit. I refuse to put that much effort into survival.

And my manager was like no!!!! If that happened, I would drive to find you guys in my truck and we could eat stuff from my wife's garden and I would make sure everyone I know survived!! I would carry you all on my shoulders away from the zombies!!

Anyway, random shout out to that guy. You were too kind for retail management, Devin.

[lesbianshepard]

also afterwards everyone who was talking about their cool bunker fantasies were like "Damn, Devin's right, we should also be considering helping people around us." which is the only recorded instance of a retail shift making people better human beings.

[pmamtraveller]

The Pearl With The Girl Earring by Olaf Falafel

[byjove]

you are the casting director for a movie about King Arthur, which role are you casting 80s Kyle MacLachlan in?

Sir Gawain

Sir Lancelot

Sir Perceval

Sir Galahad

Sir Bedivere

Arthur himself, of course

Merlin (he has the range)

Lancelot & Galahad double role

Perceval & Galahad double role

another knight (will elaborate in the tags)

he’s an FBI agent in this movie too, for some reason

I dunno

Remaining time: 6 days 18 hours

[moldavite]

my fav thing in the entire world is witnessing people try new things. almost teared up at this bc i love it so much

[x-h3kk3ning-x]

Sooooooooo was anyone gonna tell me Luigi Mangione plead guilty, or was I just supposed to look that up myself?

[cosmonautroger]

[misscromwellsmonocle]

The Lazy Italian Girl (1757) by Jean Baptiste Greuze

[quendergeer]

god, you take a five minute break and some asshole paints a picture

[trans-lykanthropie]

I bet Jean Baptiste wasn't helping with the washing up or doing the laundry

[spinningyarns]

Honestly, she looks like she has cramps. (She also looks not unlike me)

[the-haiku-bot]

Honestly, she looks

like she has cramps. (She also

looks not unlike me)

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[sexy-necromancing-bird]

Is the guy in the cuck chair supposed to stay quiet or is he allowed to clap and cheer

[foxgirlmindcrank]

he's supposed to take notes and make an intrigued hum when an interesting plot point occurs

[conspiracydeerist]

[blu3str1k3]

[thisarenotarealblog]

one is getting cucked by the bottom and the other is getting cucjed by the top. Subject matter experts discussing the sex like a sports panel

[morganoperandi]

One cuck always lies, the other always tells the truth. You have one question to determine who’s a top and who’s a bottom.

[whumpster-fire]