
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
KIROKAZE

@theartofmadeline
wallacepolsom
RMH
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
h

JVL

blake kathryn
🪼
occasionally subtle

⁂

Product Placement
Jules of Nature
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
taylor price
Three Goblin Art
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Claire Keane

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seen from Malaysia
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@spinningyarns
When cats walk up to you all "hi can I perhaps interest you in me, kitten boy? I'm literally warm and soft"
The Eugene Guard, Oregon, July 8, 1958
@blonde-elixir it’s you from the knees down
@woolandflax it’s you from the knees up
hey don't cry. 7,401 species of frog in the world, ok?
IMPORTANT UPDATE: 7,532 species of frog in the world, ok?!
great news! 7,556 species of frog in the world, ok?!
hey don't cry, now there are 7,576 species of frog in the world, ok?!
excellent news! 7,591 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth
guess what! 7,624 species of frog on planet earth, ok?
hey don't cry, 7,645 species of frog on planet earth, ok? peace and love on planet autism
great news! 7,653 species of frog on planet earth, ok?
hey don't cry. 7,670 species of frog on planet earth, ok?
new year new frogs! 7,678 species of frog on planet earth, ok?
hey don't cry. 7,683 species of frog in the world, ok? ❤️
hey don't cry. 7,698 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth
hey don’t cry. 7,701 species of frog in the world, ok?
@markscherz how many of these do we get to thank you for again?
95 at present, more on the way :)
hey don't cry. 95 species of frog discovered by tumblr's own frog scientist dr. mark scherz, ok?
hey don't cry. 7,758 species of frog in the world, yippee!
hey don't cry. 7,806 species of frog in the world, ok?
hey don’t cry. 7,817 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet autism 💖
hey don't cry. 7,836 species of frog in the world, ok?
hey don't cry. 7,864 species of frog in the world, yay!
hey don't cry. 7,935 species of frog in the world, yippeeeeee
HEY DON'T CRY. 8,008 SPECIES OF FROG IN THE WORLD PER AMPHIBIAWEB AND THE 8,000TH FROG WAS DESCRIBED BY TUMBLR'S OWN FROG SCIENTIST DR. Scherz, ET AL., PEACE AND LOVE ON PLANET EARTH ‼️‼️‼️
@kittybroker she has socks
The one and only singular sock kitty now hitting the market all on their own for only $18.96!
Does this count as finding a walrus at your door?
Absolutely, and definitely less surprising than a fairy
I will concede, in this specific circumstance, it makes more sense
RIP to the legend
This goose fucking rocks and had a crazy life!
I really just have to summarize Thomas's entire life:
He was in a committed relationship with a male swan named Henry for 18-24 years before a female swan named Henrietta showed up and mated with Henry.
Thomas was initially jealous of the pair and attacked them, breaking 2 of the 5 eggs Henrietta had laid. However, once the remaining eggs hatched, Thomas warmed up to them and helped raise them.
Henry couldn't fly because of an injured wing, so Thomas taught the cygnets how to fly.
When they needed to reduce the goose population in the pond where Thomas and the swans lived, they dyed Thomas's feathers red so he wouldn't be separated from Henry.
Henry, Henrietta, and Thomas remained in their happy throuple for years and raised 68 cygnets before Henry died in 2009. After Henry's death, Henrietta found another swan and flew away, leaving Thomas alone.
Thomas finally met and mated with a female goose in 2011 and had his own babies. However, another goose named George stole them and raised them himself.
As Thomas grew elderly and blind, he was relocated to a wildlife center where he raised orphaned cygnets.
His caretaker at the center described him as "pretty high maintenance."
Thomas died in 2018 at the age of around 40. He had a funeral that included a small coffin and a procession that was led by a bagpiper. He was buried under the stone where Henry was buried, the two finally reunited in death.
Before and after his death, Thomas has been celebrated as an icon of the LGBTQ+ community for obvious reasons.
i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”
I love baby foxes. Nothing has ever had less of an idea.
buffering
feather obtained, purpose unclear
leaf obtained, purpose unclear
ground:
unclear
sibling obtained, purpose: biting
what if we all explode
This very production of Orpheus & Eurydice is now available to stream, free, for the month of June.
Ilya is so lucky that Shane proposed. Ilya would have been a nervous fucking wreck for the entire day beforehand. Wake up in the morning. Look in the mirror. Today's the day. Sob. Breathe. Okay I'm good! Turn around and Shane's hair is all in his face, still asleep on Ilya's pillow. I am NOT good. Cold shower. Breakfast that Ilya does not eat. Morning jog wherein Ilya runs like someone is chasing him. Lunch that Ilya does not eat. Drive out to the cottage. Make Shane pull over because Ilya needs to dry heave on the side of the road. "Baby we don't have to drive out today if you're not feeling well." "NO WE HAVE TO." Get to the cottage. Immediately send Shane on some kind of extended fool's errand. Shane wants to stay because Ilya is SHAKING and he is so worried. "No my love I'm fine it's just the breeze off the lake haha." It's thirty fuckig degrees Celsius. Shane finally gtfo's. Yuna, David, Rose FUCKING Landry all descend to help Ilya set up. Well. Ilya is supposed to be helping but he is standing on the deck fully dissociating. Yuna brings him tea. "Are you going to throw up the tea?" "Yes probably." Yuna takes away the tea. 800 electronic tea lights on the deck. In a parallel Ilya has no way of understanding, he both puts on and takes off a suit. Yuna fixes his curls into the hockey boy quasi-mullet that magnetizes Shane's fingers to Ilya's hair and says, "Oh, you're so handsome!" Ilya cries big fat tears. David tells a story about how his proposal to Yuna almost didn't happen because David went to the hospital for heart palpitations that morning. Thank You David That Does Not Help Even Remotely. Ilya slav squats on the lawn for twenty minutes. Shane's car pulls up in the driveway and everyone hides while Ilya vibrates in the entryway. Shane has no less than thirty grocery bags hanging from his arms, still complaining about why the grocery service cancelled their delivery last minute. Ilya leads Shane and all thirty of his grocery bags onto the deck. Shane is doing his favorite thing (bitching) and his second favorite thing (Follow Ilya) so he doesn't notice his own mother tiptoing behind him collecting the grocery bags he drops like breadcrumbs. There is an Oscar-winning actress hiding under his sofa and Shane does not notice because Ilya takes him on the deck and drops to his knees and Shane is like, "Haha, right now?" and then he sees that Ilya has a look on his face like he's just been told the sun is never coming up again and he has his hands on Shane's knees and he is saying, "Shane. Please?" and Shane puts his hands on his head and says "Oh my God baby what's happening to you" as Ilya melts and melts and then from the depths of the cottage someone who sounds a lot like Shane's very own father is whispering "The ring the ring" and when he looks back down Ilya is fumbling a ring box out of his pocket. The first picture of their proposal is Shane glaring into the middle distance with a hand cradling Ilya's curls like a baby while Ilya ugly sobs into his knee.
RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER:
my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm
a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force
daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed
always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't
you do not talk about my daughter
6. If x and y are my daughters, then there exists a set that has x and y as elements.
7. You can fold my daughter through any two points.
8. I have exactly one daughter parallel to a given line passing through a given point.
9. If my daughter is hung on the wall in the first act, then in the following one she must be fired. Otherwise don't put her there.
10. When two or more daughters are offered for a phenomenon, the simplest daughter is preferable.
11. Any sufficiently advanced daughter is indistinguishable from magic.
12. Without a clear indicator of intent, it is utterly impossible to parody my daughter without someone mistaking it for the genuine article.
13. My daughter is nine-tenths of the law.
since it’s pride month, throwback to this beautiful cover and this wholesome interaction between two icons
really endeared by this thing victor hugo does where we wont see jean valjean for a few chapters and then he'll be like. and here is a MAN who is EXCEPTIONALLY STRONG and KIND and QUIET and depending on whether or not its post m. sur m. has WHITE HAIR and NO ONE KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT HIM and ill say victor is this man jean valjean? and he'll say no...🤭 its just some other man who happens to have INCREDIBLE STRENGTH which is VERY CONVENIENT and allows him to do something no one else could. and then like three pages later he'll go suprise! it was jean valjean all along! and i'll pretend to be suprised. its like peekaboo for 186-s french men
Coyotes trying their damndest to get domesticated
Thoughts, in approximate order:
You know, given how C. lupus, C. lupus familiaris, and C. latrans can all create perfectly viable hybrids, and that the proto-dogs that domestic dogs descended from much more resembled coyotes than wolves, it's not really a surprise that some yotes are experimenting with domestication.
Goddamn that lady must be fucking shredded to be able to chase down a coyote through a swamp.
"Don't let wild animals into your house, you are not going to make Dogs 2.0, you're going to get injured and the animal killed." is probably obvious enough advice that I don't need to put it in the tags as a reminder.
...I know more than four people on this site that have poisoned themselves trying out 'foraging guides' they found online, two people IRL who tried to keep raccoons at pets, and have a family member who got hospitalized for Cat Scratch Fever after grabbing a feral cat bare-handed. This is apparently, not obvious enough.
Do Not Attempt To Domesticate Coyotes
It's been a while since I said "this person wins the internet", but today it is merited.
(via bsky)
(The classic XKCD comic)
If I were a murderer, and I'd meticulously planned a murder, and then I turned up at the place to do the murder and found that world-famous-murder-solver Hercule Poirot was also there, I would simply not do the murder.
He'd still know. He'd take you out to a fancy dinner and regale you with stories of his past accomplishments interspersed with sincere compliments about your attire and the way you wear your hair. Then, the moment the waiter collects the desert plates, he'll say he say just "one more little story" and then lay out your entire murder plan in front of you from start to finish. Everything's there. Even the drunk ex-actor you hired to pretend to be you while you were committing the crime. That guy isn't even here. He was going to show up tomorrow. You haven't even telegrammed to cancel yet. The only thing he couldn't figure out is how you were going to dispose of the clown costume before Lady Ellison found it inside her hat box. Stunned, you tell him you were just going to throw it in the lake weighed down by some rocks.
"Ah, well," he says, a brief look of disappointment crossing his face. "That would have made this case entirely too easy to solve. It is perhaps for the best you have reconsidered, no?"
You ask if he's going to turn you in. He looks genuinely shocked.
"Turn you in for a crime you didn't even commit? Mon Dieu! Not even Hercule Poirot could be successfully doing this!"
"Truly?" you say, your hands shaking slightly. "But...you know I fully intended to kill him. If I hadn't seen you on the train, I would have gone through with it."
"But you did not," he says precisely. "And you will not ever, now that you know the eye of Hercule Poirot will forever be upon you. There is no crime in anger. There is no crime in hatred. There is even no crime in wishing to do the murder. The only crime is in the doing. And Hercule Poirot only concerns himself with crimes."
He looks you in the eye, then. And now you can see it, the truth of this silly little man. Past the little body and the prissy outfits, past the ostentatious moustaches and egg shaped bald pate. You thought yourself so smart, so clever, so righteous in your anger. And he saw through you in an instant. This silly little man who wears his own vainglory like a polished, perfectly straight tie pin would have sent you to the gallows without a second thought.
He didn't need one. He'd figured you out with the first.
"You have chosen not to do. You have done so for the best of reasons, because you recognize the folly of trying to outsmart Hercule Poirot. But even if your reason was not so great, I would celebrate your choice all the same. There is no such thing as the bad reason to choose against staining your soul with murder."
With a polite smile, he pays for your meal and leaves before you can say anything else. You never see him again. The next morning you book passage back home. You see the man you were going to kill occasionally, out and about. But for some reason the old anger you always felt in his presence, the righteous fury that burned in your breast at the very whiff of his cologne, the pain that tore through your body every time you thought of how he has wronged you, never returns.
He is just a person, you realize. A loathsome person, but a person nevertheless. In the end, it is not your place to judge him. It had never been your place. His judgement rests in the hands of someone much wiser and more just than you could ever be. Than even the great Hercule Poirot could hope to be.
You never see that silly little man again. But you keep him in your prayers for the rest of your life.
He kept you from making the worst mistake you ever could have made. And you are grateful.