I would die for Henry Crabgrass

Former URL: gaydisastermonk The content and activity level of this blog vary wildly depending on my current hyperfixations. I tag my Critical Role posts and pretty much nothing else.

[egberts]

also part of growing up is realizing that the embarrassing music you liked in your early teen years still goes hard as hell

[whitepeopletwitter]

[kalesrebellion]

So funny story actually. One of my friends was hooking up with this girl, they were friends with benefits. She needed a date for some work party so he agreed to go with her. Turns out her dad owns like 3 dental practices and she worked as the business manager for one of them.

Anyway my friend had some not so nice teeth and during dinner the father of his fwb was like “you work where you work, you sleep with him and his teeth look like that? Get him an appointment.”and then bounced. So his fwb made him an appointment at the practice she managed and my friend ended up needing like 3k worth of dental work and his friend with benefits just gave it to him for free.

So that is the story of how my friend not only got sex, but dental out of the friends with benefits deal.

[helloitsbees]

[animatedtext]

[pansy2025]

goo goo dolls if they were in dune: and i don’t want the worm to see me

[mezzodical]

[miiilowo]

whenever i get worried about being judged i just gotta remind myself that most people genuinely just arent mean. some people really do suck but i think 98% of the human population is a lot kinder than your anxiety would let you believe

[miiilowo]

it's easy to lose sight of when youre online but all the dickheads are just pushed forward by algorithms. theyre an exception that are being way overrepresented. most people have sense and logic and are kind and normal and well adjusted in the real world

[cherubg1rl]

“People you may know” and it’s the devil from the Bible

[tympanista]

[batneko]

[thelambliesdown1974]

everyone on the block hates me because I have to take my pet loose sheet of aluminum siding on a walk every day at 3am

[sickbrokenangel]

[sickbrokenangel]

THIS IS THE FUNNIEST FUCKING RESPONSE IVE EVER GOTTEN ON ANY OF MY POSTS EVER

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[holesinmyhead]

did you have the dream i sent you?

[loveridden1999]

top 3 hobbies for young adults:

1. borrowing misery from future

2. carrying grief of the past

3. agonizing over the present

[fyeahcontroversialcharacters]

[sinclair-wildstar]

I will reblog this every time it crosses my dash.

[dreamychocolateprincess]

People who don’t get this infuriate me

[doggirlpaws]

The spirit of Diogenes is alive and well

[rowark]

This is funny, obviously, but even if you don't go to the extreme of the example above, this is a separate seat for one person, with a back and 4 legs:

But it's not a chair. It's a bar stool.

This, however, are all chairs:

Each one is missing at least one component of the chair definition above.

So like... it's almost like strict definitions are exclusionary.

[lizluvscupcakes]

Reblog to hit a transphobe with a separate seat for one person

[the-haiku-bot]

Reblog to hit a

transphobe with a separate

seat for one person

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[lizluvscupcakes]

[misericordiia]

wound dressings and bandages are lingerie for the enlightened pervert

[misericordiia]

shit dude did we lose jesus again

[nealashitposts]

I cant go to my local libary anymore because last year when I stopped by a librarian was reading a book I wrote under a pen name years ago. This book sold under 10k copies and I've literally only heard people talk about this book online *if* I went looking for it so I went up to them and tried to start a conversation like "oh hey I've heard of that book is it good?" Like hoping for some real feedback and she goes "yeah I love reading things by queer writers" and in a moment of terror I was like "oh but- hold on, I thought the author was some old hetero white guy?!" A thing I thought because I used my own dead grandpa's picture for the author pic because grandpa never had internet. I fake looked it up and was like "yeah if he was queer its not public?" And without looking up this absolute unit goes "oh the author bio is obviously fake. I'd bet my left leg the author is a west coast millennial non-binary queer who has never lived on the east coast." And then proceeded to rattle off a dozen linguistic flourishes that are specfic to the pacific northwest that are in the book and several that are nearly ubiquitous in the state where I said my pen name lives that are somehow completely absent from the book.

So you know. Got read for fifth and didn't even find out if she liked it.

[miss-americanbi]

grace you gotta lock in

[fflittermouse]

But what if teams isn’t working?

[rustingbridges]

I like to fuck around and waste time for at least ~6-10 hours per day, and let me tell you, that really puts some pressure on your schedule. you have no idea how busy I am