Summary: You wear "revealing" clothing to a supermarket with Sukuna. Unfortunate to say, two strangers were not at all pleased. "Like hell, I'd let you touch her." He grits his teeth, watching the man in front of me kneel and wither in pain.
tw. you can change what you wear to what you please. In this fic though, it's described to give more context. Sukuna in his own body modern AU. Getting shamed; use of words: whore. Sukuna is violent as usual.
note. got emotionally personal here. I hope you find comfort in this fic as I did when I wrote it. <33
Today was shopping day. You've finally run out of enough comfort foods to force you out of the house. You groan loudly in your room. You were wearing only your undergarments and were already getting tired of the idea of having to find clothes to wear.
a familiar face walks by your room. Sukuna stops and leans on your door, his eyes observing your lazy state. "C'mon brat. Dress pretty. I'll take you out after shopping."
Your head snaps excitedly to Sukuna. It was rare of him to invite you out, especially since you were both so busy all the time. You simply just cherish the swift time at home cuddling and whatnot. Sukuna smirked at your reaction. Satisfied, he left to give you time to choose and change clothes.
After much consideration and throwing closet clothes on the floor, you decided to wear something showy, a cropped tee with its ends tied, a plaid skirt that falls above your knees, paired with a small bag and boots. You choose your accessories, put on a touch of makeup, and then you are good to go. "Kuna~!" You sing.
As you walk out the door, you find Sukuna looking at his phone and then quickly looking at you. You twirl, showcasing your outfit as he smiles. He walks towards you and grabs you by the waist. "How awful. My princess dolled up so pretty." He grins, his grip on your waist secure, leaning in for a kiss.
You stop him with your hand. "No. Kuna' we all know what a kiss will lead to," You pout, and Sukuna laughs silently on your skin. "Now, come on, I expect you to take me on to a charming night!"
The supermarket was the same as ever. Customers minding their business, the sound of cashier ringing in the distance, and stocks of your comfort foods.
"Ahh, there you are. I've missed you." You gleam at the snacks in front of you. Snack's destined to be finished within the week. You were left alone for a bit since Sukuna usually parts with you to grab things he needs as well.
By "needs," he grabs excessive amounts of food that would leave you bankrupt if you didn't pick through them every time you passed by him.
"Hey there." Suddenly, someone taps your shoulder. You turn your head to see two guys standing in front of you.
"Hello, do you need help with anything?" you smile politely.
"Ugh, seriously?" The first guy sneers. You tilt your head at him, hoping that comment wasn't directed at you.
"Dude, she's totally leading us on. Did you see that snarky smile?" The other guy says. Your eyebrows bridged together. Just your luck to be left in an aisle with these two idiots, huh?
"Sorry, you're getting the wrong idea-" You get cut off by a hand that warmly placed itself on your shoulder.
"You know em'?" Sukuna's voice was husky and low, gesturing his head towards the two men.
"Not reallyโโ Before you could finish explaining, The second guy from behind steps in, "Dude, you should really cover your girl up." He comments.
"Yeah, like, the way she looked at us earlier? damn, I almost mistook her for a whore." The other one added. Your heart sank at the disgusting comments made by them. You placed both your hands on your skirt, your basket resting on your arm. You actually felt confident to wear something like this because you knew Sukuna would be with you, you knew Sukuna would approve of it, and you knew YOU would feel good as well.
"Ha." your thoughts get cut off by Sukuna's voice. If looks could kill, indeed. You knew this situation would escalate, and really, all you want is a smooth, relaxing evening with your lover.
You raise your hand high enough for them to notice, "I'm sorry, you really got the wrong ideaโโ Suddenly, the first guy tries to grab you by extending his hand swiftly, but before his fingers could reach you, Sukuna stops him by the wrist.
The next thing you hear is the painful cry and a loud snap. Sukuna broke his wrist all while his other hand was still secured onto your shoulder.
"Like hell, I'd let you touch her." He grits his teeth, watching the man in front of me kneel and wither in pain. The second guy wasted no time and launched at Sukuna, only for him to be dodged and punched right in the nose.
People started clamoring around, and you could already hear security calling backup.
"Sukuna, let's go." You urge him but not waiting for a response. You grab his hand, and you drop your basket. You run.
You were both parked at a nearby park, immediately driving away after leaving the supermarket. "You really didn't have to do all that ryo'." You softly say, inspecting the hand that he used to punch the guy.
"Besides, it's my fault. I should've dressed more modestly." You muttered under your breath. But He heard it.
"Don't ever fucking say that again." He grits his teeth. You look up at him, surprised by the sudden anger in his tone. His expression was tense, worried? maybe even a gloss of tears, if you will.
He moves his hand to push strands of hair behind your ear. It was soft, so painfully gentle. "People like that don't deserve to live. They don't deserve to have eyes nor mouths." He rambles, cupping your cheeks and kissing everywhere.
"If they were decent people, they wouldn't even think of looking at you like that, darling. They are delirious, annoying, little shits, who have nothing to do but try and push people down." He holds your hand firmly, his gaze unflinching.
"you will not be knocked down, my love. They do not deserve the space in your mind to bring you down." He lowers his head and kisses the back of your hand.
You exhale. You exhale and smile.
"I love you," he says. He looks so unbelievably beautiful.
You squeeze his hand gently before replying, "Thank you, kunaโ. I love you too."
He smirks, a playful grin places itself on his lips. "That's my girl."
"I supposed we'll be banned there, won't we?" You ask, remembering the reason why you were in the supermarket anyway.
He scoffs, "Whatever, i'll ask someone else to do it for us." Sukuna grumbles, kissing the tip of your nose.
He leans back and starts up the car again, "Right now, you deserve a date."
Summary: You who are sensitive to sounds, take Sukuna Ryomen to a festival. "What the hell was that? An act?" Sukuna scoffs, his eyes never leaving yours. Maybe, he won't ever look away again.
tw. description of panic attack, slight ooc sukuna(?)
note. imagine Sukuna in any body you want. I personally did not write him having four hands in mind, though this takes place in the heian era. so sukuna is sukuna in whatever body you wish him to be in <33
You worked as a maiden at a shrine high in the mountains. It was established by the king of curses himself. Performing duties that consist of protecting and cleaning the shrine for the king to glamor at once he comes by. You weren't even sure why he visits everyday, it's not like the shrine grants miracles or oracles everyday and you doubt the king of curses even believes in the Gods.
Though since you've been stationed alone (with Uraume coming by sometimes), You have no choice but to make talk with the king himself. Plenty of times, you've overstepped boundaries, annoying Sukuna and asking him questions unrelated to your profession. You were so sure you were only alive because Sukuna actually enjoyed your company.
"My king!" You strode to Sukuna, who was closely approaching the shrine. He walks past you, not acknowledging your presence, yet it is by routine that you follow him wordlessly.
"There are no messages for you today, my king. The shrine here has been quiet and peaceful." you bowed your head even if his back was turned. The shrine was most likely quiet due to Sukuna's constant presence, his aura so dark it wards off the good spirits.
Sukuna walks over to his usual seat close to a tree. A seat that has a gorgeous view of the village below. You sit next to him silently, adjusting your white-painted kimono with streaks of gleaming red.
You fiddled your hands together. You recall a newspaper you read earlier today. It promoted a festival, the first one youโll have a chance to witness. You hoped to bring the king of curses with you since you've heard all sorts of stories about friends, lovers, and families having a splendid time inside the festival, eating all sorts of junk, and enjoying the breeze till night falls.
"Out with it woman." Your daydreaming has been stopped abruptly, not realizing you've been staring at the horizon for a while now. You look at Sukuna, who has been staring at you for who knows how long.
"Ah..it's nothing, my king." you nervously say without thinking, knowing Sukuna expects a response the moment he asks for one.
"Lying will get you nowhere, doll." He says before relaxing his body whilst changing his sitting position to a more casual one.
"T-The festival, my king." You gulp, close your eyes, and take a deep breath. After all, these may as well be your last words.
"I was hoping to invite you, for I intend to participate tonight." You manage to finish your sentence alive, but you are offered a scoff and a scowl. "Why do you think I'd go with you? A creature as lowly as yo-"
"Sukuna. I-I promise you, it will be fun!" You cut off Sukuna, your hands curled into a fist, and your pleading eyes lie on his. Sukunaโs eyebrows rose, surprised by your disrespect. Regardless, you slowly moved closer to him and proceeded to softly grab his arm.
"Sukuna, please! Just give it a try. I guarantee you won't regret it." You plead once more, recalling the memory of when you first tried saying his name. It was the first time you thought the end of your life must be due. Surprisingly, Sukuna did nothing but stare at you with those piercing eyes before walking away. An unspoken cue that he allows you to.
"Brat, go by yourself." He says before standing up and leaving the shrine, leaving you alone. Did you just try to invite the King of curses to a night together? and somehow you are still alive? you count that as a win.
The time to go to the festival has arrived, and you are currently standing outside the entrance. The festival opening gave u a warm greeting with the decor, the lanterns above that gleamed red and gold. Muffled voices could be heard everywhere, and people were constantly rushing in and out.
You haven't finished admiring the outside when someone had bumped into you from behind. You quickly turn around and see Sukuna Ryomen, dressed in a proper kimono that covers his chest. He doesn't look at you. He simply huffs with his arms crossed.
"Sukuna!? you came!" You smiled, catching Sukuna staring at your lips.
"Whatever, doll. It's my duty as king to oversee what ruckus mortals have caused." He grumbles before walking past you and into the crowd.
You smirked in triumph. This night will be more than good, you could tell. You grabbed Sukunaโs arm and walked next to him into the festive night.
Shops of food and trinkets were to be seen, the sky lit up by stars and lights, and the stage preparing something of the sort. You and Sukuna push through the crowds and into the shops. You were about to get separated till you felt the man behind you grab your hand sternly. Your hands felt warm, your heart pounding in your ears, and all there was left to do was push forward.
"Mmn! This taste'm reallโ good'm" You try to word out while chewing on the street foods you bought. "You really'm should try shom' kuna'." You say, still munching.
"What did you call me?" You turn your head at him, his expression showing pure surprise. "..Hm? I called you-"
dun, dun, dun. The hearing of drums could be heard loudly throughout the festival. Following that was a series of cheers and yells from the crowd gathering around the stage.
Dun Dun Dun Dun. Your grip on your food tightened. Sukuna glances at you, but you don't seem to notice. He'd expect you to rush over to the stage by now.
Your heart starts pounding. The taste of food left on your tongue feels uncomfortable. "Sukuna, I think we should-"
Bam, bam, bam, the drums were now louder and repetitive without stopping. A pair of guitars chimed in as well, and a speaker took on the middle. The crowd yells and cheers- and jumps- and the- lights and the scene escalating in front of you was moving and everything is so, so, loud.
You breathe. Or maybe you don't, because Sukuna has grabbed you by your arm. Your stomach is knotting so tightly, and your heart is pounding so loudly it's ringing in your ears. The drums, the guitar, the speaker, the lights, the crowd, the-
Sukuna grabbed you on both sides of your arms. You try to focus on his face. Why is he yelling, you wonder? what is he yelling, you wonder?
Your vision cleared slightly. Sukuna, who is always stone-cold, is looking at you with an emotion you haven't seen on him before. His eyebrows were bridged together, and he's saying too much, saying things too fast. He doesn't understand whatโs happening, he doesn't know what to do.
Another loud boom rang in your ears, and the speaker screamed, 'Get ready for tonight's biggest hit yet!'
You were shaking like a leaf by now, your arms slowly covering your ears as your eyes were tightly shut. Suddenly, someone was carrying you, the breeze hit your skin way too fast, and you realize that Sukuna was running.
You don't know how long youโve been carried, but the moment you opened your eyes, you were atop a hill, the breeze cold and the noises muffled. The festival could still be seen, and the lights were still so bright.
You wipe your tears. A second ago, you felt as if your eardrums were to burst and your irritation would explode out of you.
"You scared me there, princess." You look behind to see Sukuna sitting on the grass next to a tree. His words came out softer than he intended it to be.
"What the hell was that? An act?" Sukuna scoffs, his eyes never leaving yours. Maybe, he won't ever look away again.
You walk slowly toward him, you felt exhausted and limp. You walk till your standing right in front of him.
"I'm sorry Sukun-"
Fireworks. A sudden, jumpscare-like sound appears behind you.
You flinch hard, but before you could cover your ears, big hands wrap around your head and pull you down. Sukuna pulls your head to his chest, his hands covering your ears, and your face flushed at his actions.
His chest was rock solid, but surprisingly, it was so comfortable. It felt safe, undeniably secure. You thought you could fall asleep in his arms right then and there.
No, you wanted to see the fireworks. You were here for the festival; it's not fair not to see it to the end.
You slowly shift your head upwards to look at Sukuna. But before you could part your lips to say something, he kisses you.
Sukuna Ryomen, kisses you.
His hands were still covering your ears, and he used his hold on you to pull you even deeper. His kiss was passionate, deep, harsh.
Your lips part, and your mouth is still gaping. Sukuna smirks wordlessly before moving your position so you could see what was left of the fireworks.
Your back was rested on his chest, and his hands were still covering your ears. You forgot to react to the kiss and were taken aback by the beauty of the fireworks. It was a shame you couldn't tolerate the sound of it, but the sight was so much more worth it.
This was made possible because of Sukuna. Sukuna, the King of curses who has kissed you tonight. You were sure your life would never be the same again.
an. apocalypse by cax started playing while writing the kiss scene; im soft.
Daydreaming about Geto Suguru being emotionally in pain but regards it as nothing due to the fact he thinks he needs to be the strong one to hold everything in place.
Satoru, Shoko, Nanami, Haibara. Geto Suguru feels as if he needs to always be strong, putting a carefree smile on his face to keep everythingโeveryone, intact. They were all tired, fighting, losing, grieving. Being a Jujutsu Sorcerer was no easy feat, and the burden was even heavier on Geto.
You hear keys jangle at your door, your lover had finally arrived home, โSuguru!โ
โHey.โ He responds softly, He was a man of few words, yet you paid no mind with it. He opens his arms as you launch yourself at him.
Geto hugs were often soft, filled with love, and hands that search for warmth. But this time, it felt needy. His hands were not hugging you tightly but rather loosely hanging on your waist, his face buried into your shoulder, his bun being seen as you rest your chin on his neck.
โโruโ?โ, you hummed twice now. You were sure he wasnt listening, which was unusual. He always listened to you and your needs, whatever it may be or whenever it may be, he listens.
โSuguru?โ You repeated for the third time.
โWhat is it, love?โ He murmurs, clearly not caring what it was you had to say.
โAre you okay?โ
He stiffens. His body rigids for a moment before sheepishly going back into his relaxed state โuhuh.โ He sternly says, nodding slightly.
You squeeze his shoulder, he was gripping your waist now, his face shifting to the side, looking away from you.
โYou know you dont always have to be okay, right?โ You slowly say, tracing his arm with your free hand while the other smoothens his neck.
Geto grips your waist even tighter, a silent plea to stay by his side for as long as you allow yourself to.
โโฆmhm.โ He says weakly. Geto sniffles, your shoulder slowly becoming damp.
You kiss his forehead, the night surely to be filled with assurance and soft exchange.
Suguru lifting you so you can be seen in a photo. Link
Daydreaming about Geto Suguru being emotionally in pain but regards it as nothing due to the fact he thinks he needs to be the strong one to hold everything in place. Link
You who are sensitive to sounds, take Sukuna Ryomen to a festival. "What the hell was that? An act?" Sukuna scoffs, his eyes never leaving yours. Maybe, he won't ever look away again.
Link.
๐๐๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐ฃ๐๐ก ๐ฆน
You wear "revealing" clothing to a supermarket with Sukuna. Unfortunate to say, two strangers were not at all pleased. "Like hell, I'd let you touch her." He grits his teeth, watching the man in front of me kneel and wither in pain.
Link.
Thinking of Geto Suguru lifting you so you can be seen in photos.
Its a tight-knit party with all the students and you just happen to be behind Gojo Satoru. This freakishly strong white hair boy thatโs over 6 foot 3.
They weโre already setting up the camera and everyone was shuffling to get to their places. You try to tip-toe but with no luck, only the top of your head could be seen.
โFucking hell,โ you mutter. Not realizing the eyes set on you since earlier. Geto finally chokes the laughter out of him. Snickering at your frowned face before putting a hand on your waist.
โWhat, Suguru?โ You raise an eyebrow at him,
He smirks before putting another hand on your hips. He breathes in, then without warning lifts you up. You squeal softly, realizing what was happening.
โSuguโโ he puts you on his shoulder, his arm fully securing your weight, his other squeezing softly at your plush thighs.
can you pls write something about reader being sick and like not the cough and cold kind of sick- like really really sick, and sukuna realising how much he doesn't want to lose her to this sickness and how if she dies, he'll be alone again..๐ฅบ
You have NO idea how much I love this idea!!! I did go a bit overboard with it cause I love suffering though ๐ Still, this was SO much fun to write and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!
Vows
Sukuna x Reader
Word count: 4.5k
Tags/warnings: gn! reader, true form! sukuna, master/pet dynamic, fluff but most importantly ANGST, mentions of weight loss, mentions of violence, implied nsfw, reader dies in the end :( (sorry)
It's not the first time Sukuna has been made aware of your mortality. He recalls many instances when he's been reminded that you are human. Finite. The first time he wrapped his hand around your throat and squeezed with calculation while you were laying under him, and you looked up at him in fear for your life. Your little hand couldn't even wrap around his wrist, much less provide resistance. Or when he'd pull your hair a little too roughly, and hear a crack in your delicate spine. When you'd get sick, and humbly refuse his healing. So little as a tummy ache had you writhing on your bed.
You are so weak, so small, clinging to life like there was anything for you in it, beyond Sukuna. By all means he hates all of these things. So what witchery is this, and why does he care about you so much? Why does he keep you for years, and why does your company bring him comfort he hasn't ever known in his lifetime?
Still, as much as he cares, he doesn't notice when it starts. He's trained you to tolerate pain, after all. It's no wonder you hesitate to tell him. Little things like tummyaches and colds occur to you all the time anyways, and you never complain. Sure, you've grown closer to Sukuna, but he was still your master, and the rules he instilled in you from the start were always fresh in your mind, not to be crossed. Bothering him with everything that feels off always seemed inappropriate.
And Sukuna is just like that. If you're not screaming or crying, he won't know you're in pain. But he notices that you're acting off. And how he reacts really doesn't help your case, or encourage you to speak up about your condition. ''I don't have all day. What is wrong with you?'', he sneers when he catches you pacing too far behind him.
So you just sleep longer and preserve energy for when you are with him. You don't skip around as much anymore, or spend time doing your hobbies. Food doesn't taste so great anymore. You have a cough that gives you sleepless nights because it just won't calm down. And the time you owe Sukuna starts to feel like an obligation. You start to dread it. Dread slipping up, dread annoying him or failing to satisfy him. Dread being disposable.
When things start getting worse, it's hard to hide it even from him. He was taking you from behind one night, and you were grateful he couldn't see the look on your face. You thought you could do it. Sukuna was always demanding, but he would never force you to do anything. If only you told him before you felt yourself struggling for air, and your chest closing in on itself in tightness. You reached one hand back, frantically grabbing his wrist.
''Feathers, feathers!'', words came out as gasps, and you slumped forward when he let you go. You were panicked and crying by then, this kind of discomfort being foreign even to you, even after weeks of pain behind you. He hovered next to you with a puzzled look on his face. He wasn't even being that rough.
''What's wrong? Tell me.'', he said, and reached his hand to feel the warmth of your tears streaming down your face. He swiped your cheek gently. He didn't seem mad at all. Why didn't you say anything from the start?
''I just feel so sick.'', you muster up in between sobs, and shut your eyes. You were too embarrassed to even look at him.
''I see.''. His hand leaves your face, and he traces it from your neck down your spine. The pain subsided slowly, allowing you to relax and find comfort in his arms.
But the effects of his healing were short lived. Just a week later the feeling of fatigue creeps back into your life. Manageable, but lingering. And the cough persists. And it gets on Sukuna's nerves too. He's been quite patient with you, but his patience was reaching it's limit.
You're sitting by his throne as you often do, and as hard as you try to hold the cough in, you just can't help it. His hand finds the back of your neck and squeezes, turning you to him. And he looks at you with all four, terrifying eyes. ''Can you shut up?''
''I'm sorry, I'm trying -'', you stutter, but just end up coughing more. He doesn't wait for you to stop.
''Get out of here.'', and pushes you away. You stumble down the pile of bones and fall, landing on your hands and knees. You don't remember him being this cruel to you in a long time. You look back at him with teary eyes, and he looks back like the merciless monster he is. The villagers awaiting him moved to make space for your fall, taking note of the tense situation.
That day, Sukuna sends word that he doesn't want to see you until you get better. You're forbidden from going outside again, in fear that that is making your 'cold' worse. It's a lonely week in your room, until Sukuna starts to crave you again. It didn't take him a while, counting the couple days he spent convincing himself he doesn't miss you. He does. So when he sends word for you again, and the servants come back to him saying you're still not feeling well... he's worried. So worried he comes to see it for himself.
Sukuna rarely comes to your room. It's the only space you have for yourself, and he doesn't want to take that away from you. Your room is modest. You have a bed, a carpet, and a couple shelves to house the books he's gifted you. There's a desk where you can eat and read, and a doorway to the garden. There's an empty glass of water and a napkin next to your bed. You're still sleeping, but the door shutting behind him wakes you up, so he doesn't get to enjoy observing you in your natural habitat for long.
It's not the first time doors opening and closing woke you up. But you know this time is different. The servants are always quickly shuffling around the room, cleaning up and moving around. Uraume clanks with plates. There is no noise now, other than your strained breathing and a cough brewing in the back of your throat. Besides, the aura that Sukuna brings with him everywhere he goes is recognizable. Especially to you. Heavy.
You turn around, and meet the gaze of his four eyes. ''Master...'', you struggle to sit up, and even a little action like that has spots forming in your vision. Then a coughing fit hits you. You pick up the napkin and put it to your mouth.
Sukuna sees your whole body strain with the effort of coughing. And when you call him master, even your voice sounds different. He knows your morning voice. He missed hearing it, but this... this is not it. You sit with your head hung low, staring at the napkin between your hands. There's a fresh splatter of blood on it. But Sukuna scares you more than the progression of your illness.
''Are you mad at me?'', you ask timidly, meeting his gaze.
''I'm concerned.", he says and sits next to you. You curl up to make space for him. "Two weeks is a long time for a frail human like you to be sick.", he looks at you, scanning your form up and down.
"I rested and drank every tea Uraume told me to!", your defense mechanism kicks in, and you start babbling.
Sukuna dismisses you with a hand and a pained facial expression. "I know.", he says. His brows are furrowed now, and he's looking at the ground, lost in thought.
You feel guilty for annoying him again. You feel guilty for the whole thing, getting sick, draining the energy it takes him to heal you, robbing him of the time with you that he deserves. Owns. He is very generous with the way he treats you, having all that in mind.
You tug on his sleeve. "I'm sorry, Master... You deserve better.", and you're sobbing again. Sukuna gives you a pathetic look, but smiles as he pulls you into his embrace.
"Silly pet. I can survive a couple weeks without your assistance.", he says, rubbing your shoulder.
You run your fingers against the back of his hand mindlessly, not knowing how to respond. Caressing his knuckles, bones, veins... feeling his nails and their sharp tips against your sensitive skin. When you bring his palm up to your lips, your kiss stains it red with blood.
-
You still sleep with Sukuna sometimes. Less frequently, only on days when you feel well enough, and those are rare. You've lost weight by now, sickness making itself visible on your body. You're sitting on his lap and clinging to your robes, scared that he won't like you as much, that you won't live up to his standards. But Sukuna's demeanor about your illness has changed, as he seemed to sense something unusual about it. He flips you over so gently, like you're made of glass, and peppers kisses from your neck downwards, slowly undressing you as much as you allow him. When he takes you, he's so careful. Constantly checking you're comfortable and enjoying yourself. You feel so loved and relaxed, and pleasure comes so easy when you're in this state. It's not the first time Sukuna is this caring with you in bed, but this time is different. This time you can't help but feel like he's saying goodbye.
He holds you afterwards, tracing his fingers over the ridges of your spine and your shoulders. You were always little in his grasp, but now that he feels your protruding bones under his fingertips, you seem all the more vulnerable.
"Will you kill me?", you ask, breaking the silence.
Sukuna frowns. "Nonsense. Why would I do that?"
There's a gulp in your throat. "It won't be long before I can't even do this. I won't be of any use to you then...", you say.
"Stop.", he says sternly. "There's a lot more to you than what you provide me with in bed."
You smile to yourself, but there's still a hole in your chest. Your statement is still true, and you aren't comforted. But this is Sukuna, and you know that he's offered you quite a lot even with that little bit of reassurance. To your surprise, he speaks again.
"Don't upset yourself. It's been a long time since killing you crossed my mind.", he says. "Save the energy for something else."
You nod and thank him. Just moments later, you're asleep. Quicker than ever before, he notes. You usually love it when he lets you cuddle and talk to him. You would force your eyes open when you were sleepy, just to enjoy it longer.
He feels guilty. He's your master, he's responsible for your well being. Yet nothing he does seems to help you long term. Healing you is temporary and he knows that without accessing the source, it will never work. If he could, he would find what was making you sick and rip it out of you with his bare hands, crush it with the force of his palm. He would have to look deeper, open you, and for once, he thinks he can't open a human being. He thinks of you trashing, screaming, and worst of all, looking into his eyes. Just the thought of you like that makes his chest feel like a gaping cavity. Worst of all, he's sure you would let him. He's sure you would forgive him for spilling your blood, and find comfort in his arms again. If you survived, that is. What has he done to you? And to himself?
Now, your head rests on his chest, and you're snoring lightly. For once, a repetitive noise like that doesn't annoy him. For once, he wishes he could listen to it every night. One day, that noise will be the only thing audibly confirming you're still alive.
-
Months pass and you're only getting worse. You barely leave your room now, too weak to even do so. You eat little, and it's showing in your sunken cheeks and eyes. You feel yourself withering away, loosing color, drying like a dying flower. Sukuna is in grief. He struggles to look at you, and visiting you falls heavy on him every time. He always finds himself thinking afterwards. Regretting that he let himself get this attached, wishing that he could simply forget you. But it doesn't work that way.
He goes to see you, after avoiding you for a week. He's Sukuna, he doesn't have any shame. You're sleeping, like you usually are when he comes to visit you. Your snoring is laboured, and it sounds painful. This time, the doors and the silence don't wake you up. He watches you, curled up under a stack of blankets, rising and falling with your struggles to breathe. How foolish he was, to think forgetting you would be as easy as avoiding you for days. How evil he was, trying to forget you while you are still alive under his wing, still his responsibility. Still his.
He sits next to you and leans over you, fingertips ghosting over your face. The snoring stops and you flutter your eyes open, turning in bed and feeling his body next to yours. You smirk at him, eyes adjusting to the light, and smile when you recognize him. ''Master.'', your arms wrap around his neck as you welcome him, your voice dry, but lively as you beckon him closer. ''I missed you.''.
He comes down to plant a kiss to your forehead. ''I missed you too, darling.''. Oh, the things that escape his mouth when he's alone with you. He cups your face, enjoying how much healthier you look with a smile on your face. ''Feeling any better?'', he rubs your cheek, lingering closely above your face.
You nod, but both of you know you only feel better because you saw him. Still, the little surge of happiness that brings you gives you more energy than you've had the whole week. You wiggle to the edge of the bed, making space and inviting him to join you. Sukuna lies down, hooking one arm underneath your neck and pulling you flush against him.
You wrap your arm around him and lean your head against his shoulder. He's still as big as you remember him, unfaltering in the face of your illness. It's comforting. ''You didn't visit in a while. Were you busy?'', you ask, stroking his back. ''How were your days?''
''Monotone.'', he says. ''The villagers bring remedies for you every day, and wish for you to get well.'' It's no wonder. So many times, Sukuna found himself hesitating to kill just because you were sitting on his knee, dressed in something too pretty to be splattered with blood. In the local villages, word spread that you have ''domesticated'' Sukuna. As if such a thing was possible. Or was it?
''Oh?'', you smile. ''I didn't think they would notice my absence.''. You always were supposed to be Sukuna's accessory and nothing more. Remedies and good wishes make it sound like you're more important than just a pet. So it really is that obvious...
''They did.'', he says, and lowers his head, brushing his nose against your face. ''Some took that as an opportunity to gift me new pets.''
You blink at him, a bit taken aback by his honesty. You keep smiling anyways. ''Did you take any?'', you ask, and he sees nothing but genuine curiosity in your eyes. The truth is, you've had a lot of time to think about your place in Sukuna's mansion. You knew, especially in sickness, that you were never entitled to exclusivity with him. You knew that at some point you would have to be replaced, just by the virtue of being a mortal. A human, who would age and become ugly, wrinkled and useless. You were just unlucky enough to meet this fate sooner than you should've.
Sukuna sighs, the weight of the conversation shifting to him. ''Not to bed, no.'', he says.
You're quiet while you think of what to say. You still have a habit of picking words when you're with Sukuna, but the times when he would punish you for improper formulation are far behind you. "Why not?", you settle. You hope the implication is there, that you wouldn't be so mad even if he did.
Why not? Because he thinks it might break him. Because the image of someone else in your place, under him, feels unnatural and wrong. He thinks the guilt might eat him alive. For once in centuries, someone else's needs come before Sukuna's. He is gone, so far gone. You've raised his standards, and he's not sure anyone he takes now will be able to live up to them. Besides, training a new pet to fit your mold would take years, and even then... He couldn't train someone to love him. Not like you do.
''I wouldn't want you to hold back because of me.'', you say, and he realizes he's been quiet for too long. Years ago, if you dared to imply that Sukuna would do such a thing as hold back because of you, that he cared, you would've been minced meat ready for dinner. Now, he looks down at you tenderly when you say it. Well, a tender look from Sukuna is a docile one. You've gotten used to the way that Sukuna communicates love. Subtly, innocuously.
''Worry about getting well, pet.'', he shuts down the conversation, and moves away from you, sitting back on the bed. ''Any wishes? Food? Activities?'', he asks, and feels your forehead with the back of his hand.
Food? No, but... ''I'd like you to stay, please.'', you say, and take his hand with the two of yours, feeling it up with your thumbs.
Sukuna resists the urge to roll his eyes, knowing the thought of annoying him would upset you greatly. ''That's a given. Anything else?''
You pretend to think, then just babble your favorite food. Sukuna takes your order to Uraume. But when he comes back, you're already asleep again. He waits by your side, but you don't wake, so eventually he leaves. By the evening, the plate of your favorite food remains untouched.
-
You can't leave the bed on your own anymore. Sukuna carries you outside when you're feeling good enough. You barely have the strength to latch onto him securely. Still, it's hard to slip out of the grasp of his four arms. He says you've gotten pale. You lay in his lap and bask in the sun, while he tells you about his day or reads a book out loud for you to enjoy. You wish you could talk to him more, but your voice leaves you as days of endless coughing wreck your throat. No herbs and teas ease your condition anymore. You wait for your final day.
And Sukuna doesn't know when he's given up on the idea that you might get better. But he starts spending whole days with you, leaving your side only to sleep in his bed. He tends to almost all your needs personally. You think that if you asked him to get on his knees for you, he would. He is not familiar with this ache that brews in his chest when he looks to his side and doesn't see you there. It feels violating. To be as powerful as he is, and yet completely helpless in the face of the sickness that drains you in front of his very eyes.
He plays with your thinning hair one morning, and you look at him from his lap, as adoringly as always. ''Isn't it funny?.'', you say, and he snaps out of his thoughts to look at you. ''I always imagined dying by your hand.'', you kiss his hand again, planting your dry, blue lips against his knuckles. ''Who would have thought?''.
You, you little human. You made him feel like a fool, like a coward. You made him feel powerless. Who could ever get away unscathed with making Sukuna feel like this? The thought of killing you now, even out of mercy, fills him with horror. He thinks he couldn't live carrying the burden of your death on his back. It's already hard for him as is.
When he's not with you, he withers away in his room, waiting. And when the servants finally come, and tell him you're at your last strengths, he feels as tense as he feels relieved. The servants shake in fear of his reaction, and he simply dismisses them. In a thousand years of his existence, he doesn't remember having to prepare to enter a room. His hand trembles as he brings it up to push the door open. He dreads what awaits him inside.
He expected blood, hysteria, chaos, yet there's none of it when he walks in. Just the pained noises of your breathing. A servant, your favorite, sits by your side and wipes sweat off your forehead. She talks to you in a comforting tone and pats your head gently. When he walks in the room, she lowers her head and moves to leave. It's only a second, but he sees the sad look on your face. ''Stay.'', he orders, and the servant bows and thanks him.
You move your attention to him, raising your hand to greet him weakly. He picks it up and bends down to kiss it. There's tears in your eyes as he settles into a seat next to you, and you open your mouth in an attempt to say something.
''Easy now.'', he shushes you, and helps you into his lap. You lean back, looking at him through a blur. His features appear even more doubled through the tears, and you still find his beauty mesmerizing. Your master. Your own little god and protector. Although he regrets it, you've never claimed the title of his spouse. Yet, he still stuck by your side, until parted by death. In sickness and in health.
He wipes your tears, and the mouth he conjures onto his hand kisses your forehead. One set of his hands caresses your face, the other massages the tension out of your bony shoulders. Sukuna knows how important it is for you to pass in peace. He doesn't want to curse you, or have despair turn you into a curse. "Relax now.", his voice is so soothing, as if lulling you to sleep. "It won't be long". You weep. What did an ordinary human like you do to deserve this honor? To be comforted on their death bed by a god. To be guided to death by him.
"Master.", you sob. "I'm so scared..."
Delicate touch against your skin. Sharp nails grazing your cheek ever so slightly, just barely enough to make their presence known. "Have no fear.", Sukuna looms over you like a snowdrop. "Where you go now, pain won't follow.". You speak to him a little longer. Tell him all the things you always wanted to tell him, but were scared of the consequences. Dangerous words, ones that were rarely associated with Sukuna. Love. And Sukuna is attentive, so human. Your blinking slows and you find comfort in his voice, as he returns every loving word back to you. Your pained breathing follows, and your eyelids are so heavy. But the sight of him is so hypnotizing, you wish you never had to look away. "You are so brave, my little dove. Go now, be free.". You were too good for this wretched palace anyways. The sight of him is etched in your memory as you close your eyes. "It was a pleasure to have you by my side.", you listen, feeling control over your body slip through your fingers. When you can't move, or feel his touch, you still hear his calm voice. "When you're ready, come back to me. I'll be waiting for your return.". Then everything is quiet, for you and for him. The servants cries are muffled by the sheets, where she has her head pressed by your side.
The hallways, silent except for the busy tapping of feet. Outside, the wind blows petals off of blooming flowers, leaving them bare and stranded. Autumn is here to carry you away.
Servants hold their breath when Sukuna walks by. One wrong look at him and the walls would be painted red. Just like before. Before you. And it's not long before Sukuna looks like a monster again - red eyes and a permanent frown etched on his face. Villagers bring bouquets, and lay them to the right of his throne, where you used to sit. He stares them all down, and only for a moment thinks that maybe, humans are not the scum he thought they were. But then he remembers, they only mourn you because you held him back from his destructive tendencies. Scum.
And he kills again. The first is a villager from afar, where news of your passing hasn't reached. Ripped to shreds for mentioning you. The women who screamed, their blood soaks the carpets and seeps through the wooden floor, dripping down to the cellars. He feels like himself again, unhinged, unbeatable.
Until the day is over, and he goes back to his empty room. His cold, empty bed, and the old habit of reaching for you in his sleep, only to grab nothing instead. And the crocheted figures of the two of you on his nightstand, watching him as he struggles to sleep alone. He can't bear it. So he leaves, and doesn't come back for days, weeks, months.
Smoke clouds the skies on the horizon once again, after years and years of peace and clarity. As far as the eye stretches, the world will know of Sukuna's wrath. But as thrilling as it feels to conquer again, when the village is burned and ash covers the grass on the ground, the thought of you still lingers. Your devastated eyes the first time he's killed before you. The first time he's felt guilty about his monstrous nature. When he comes back, no one's warm embrace awaits him. No one's there to brighten up his day. No amount of blood shed and villages burned replace the emptiness you left behind in his heart.
The grief settles, and sits heavy in Sukuna's chest, as he assumes position in his lonely throne again, and gazes at the row of people waiting to beg, talk, offer... bore him. Another eternity of boredom. An eternity of picking through thousands of humans, in vain hopes of finding you again. In vain hopes of recognizing you, even if it's lifetimes from now, when the last memory of your face has already faded from his mind. When generations change, and the thought of a monster like Sukuna being capable of tenderness vanishes. When the fire in his chest, ignited by love, is already a memory so distant, that recalling it feels surreal.
Maybe he will forget you by then. Maybe times will harden him again, and the idea of a pet becoming his lover will make him laugh. But for now, the thought of finding you in a crowd, taking you in his arms and never letting go, is his comfort and safe place. For now, he will wait for you. As long as it takes, like a stone, unyielding against the passing of time.
Summary: You are at an awful party before meeting Loki on a balcony. You both share a conversation of tension and the smoke of cigarette. "I desire to learn as to why your voice is etched into the walls of my mind.โ
You were invited to a fancy dinner gathering. Granted, the night will be filled with disapproving stares and senseless rats that gossip and dance. The party is to be filled with discussions of wealth and flaunts of businesses.
Youโve decided to wear something strong and bold to the eye. A dress, a garment gracefully descending to caress the midpoint of your thigh. Something distinct, the design laced with small bits of shining gems. The color green, the color of money.
โOh, come on now, let's us not be blinded by the truth! You ARE a child of wedlock!โ
Laughter. Moronic rich people who have nothing to do but bring people down to get where they want to be. They provoke emotions to ruin reputations, a plan consisting of their followers, followers that have the task of laughing along brainlessly, like backup performers in a circus.
โAtleast I need not to suck my father's cock just to please him.โ You spat, earning frowns and gasps around your crowd.
You were not born out of wealth like these people, but you worked hard and climbed the ranks to get where you are now. These people ridicule you to no end because they cannot fathom the fact you worked hard for something only they should have the privilege of.
You turn to your heel, but before walking away, โOh daddy, will you give me more money if I take your length?โ You hissed, enunciating each word with a baby-like voice, earning once more, faces filled with anger to the specific affluent.
You walk away, ignoring the whispers that grew loudly from the scene you've caused. You turn to find an escape, a window, a balcony.
Perfect. You sighed whilst entering the balcony that finally smelled like fresh air instead of fake money. You walked till you reached the edge of the balcony, smelling the cold air and enjoying the moonlit night.
You whip out a cigarette from your dress's pocket; you usually only smoke when you are pissed or generally just done with everything.
You bring it up to your mouth before realizing you left your lighter inside your bag. โDamn.โ You whisper, biting your lip before hearing a soft chuckle, deep and low.
You turn your head and see a man dressed in a suit of green, hair slicked back, and smoke puffed out of his lips. He looks at you, his green eyes shining into yours, it was unreadable but his gaze felt dangerous.
โYour dress is charming.โ He comments.
โYes, well, it's wasted to the rats here.โ You respond, not caring if this man could be one of them moronic people. He takes a single step closer to you.
โMy name is Loki. Loki of Asgard.โ Asgard? It must be a country you don't know of. โMy father makes me come to these dull events for social 'interactions'." He continues.
โI assume you cheat out of it every time, simply by going here?โ You guessed, seeing as he looked pleased here on the balcony.
He simply smirked in response. โI go by the name (y/n).โ You say, deciding to share your name as a courtesy.
โAh yes, so I've heard.โ Silence surrounds you both, not wanting to question what he meant by that. You were frequently talked about, though it was more like being gossiped on.
You were getting quietly uncomfortable with the silence. You had nothing to do with your hands except hold your unlit cigarette.
Out of habit, you bring your cigar up to your mouth. The man beside you suddenly inches closer. He puts his free arm around and touches the other end of the balcony, locking you in without touching you.
He leans closer, faces inches apart. He then positions his cigarette with the one in your hand and shares the fire with you. Once it was lit, you bring it up to your lips and puff the smoke out, relieved you finally got to smoke.
โThank you.โ You say, suddenly feeling his arm move to your waist. You look at him with a questioning eyebrow. He moves his face away slightly. โHmm?โ You hummed.
โI must say I've heard stories about you. Fascinating that it leaves me wondering..โ He cuts his sentence off and inhales his cigarette.
He takes his hand off your waist and takes your chin instead, tilting it slightly up. You smirked, opening your mouth ever so slightly, and Loki proceeded to blow the puff of smoke inside.
You inhale it, blowing it out of your nose simultaneously. โI wonder, what is under that false display of yours.โ He finishes.
He releases his hold on you, moving his hands to the side of your neck. You feel him brush against your ear. โI want to open your soul." He confesses, whispering his words like a prayer.
"I desire to learn as to why your voice is etched into the walls of my mind.โ
You stood there, frozen in place. You decided to puff another smoke, exhaling it out on his neck as his face was still beside your ear. โMy my, you're one interested man, aren't you?โ You teased.
He chuckles softly before standing up straight. He swiftly takes something out of his pocket. โHere, call me whenever you need me.โ
"Let's talk soon." He hands you a card, which you quickly take. He turns on his heel, and just like that, your smoking partner was gone.
Summary: Loki is in the center of his conquest, worried that he has one last tie that could bring him to ruins. "If they threaten me with you, it WILL work." The once empty man is now a mess, all for you.
Summary: Loki didnโt lack in giving you anything. He was attentive to your needs and is a surprisingly good lover. Alas, his endless gifts and spoilings leave you feeling guilty for receiving so much. You have never asked for anything specifically until one day; you had an ache to take something of his. โI must not be doing my job right if my love still wants something?โ
Summary: You are at an awful party before meeting Loki on a balcony. You both share a conversation of tension and the smoke of cigarette."I desire to learn as to why your voice is etched into the walls of my mind.โ
Summary: Loki is in the center of his conquest, worried that he has one last tie that could bring him to ruins. "If they threaten me with you, it WILL work." The once empty man is now a mess, all for you.
Loki was always sure of his plans. He planned to take over the world, but to do that, he needed an army. You were both staying in Asgard as Loki began to form and arrange his plans.
"In a rush, love?" you inquired. Knowing full well his response. You looked at Loki, the man you loved and choose to ran away with, the man who you loved that convinced you to run, to rebel against Asgard and take what's 'rightfully' his.
The thought of it terrified you, of course. But in all of the days you've come to love Loki, it was the first time you'd seen him so angry, so determined. Besides, you couldn't say no to him when he asked you to support him from the side. He was the man you loved, and to love is to fight.
"I know, darling. I'm sorry, but today is an important day. I'll finally be able to sign a treatyโa promise, with them." Loki sighed as he put on his signature green cloak. 'The Chitauri.'ย The ones Loki hoped to form an alliance with, to help him with the war he was about to face.
"Be safe, Loki. I'll be waiting for you." Loki approached you and pressed his lips on your forehead, then your cheek. "I'll make it up to you, my queen." He whispered. A gold-like color illuminated Loki, and in a flash, he disappeared.
...
"FUCK!" Loki threw his daggers down on the floor.
"What happened? Why are you yelling?" You rush to him as he shuts the door loudly. He buries his face on your neck, breathing your scent in.
You wrap your arms around his neck, embracing him back, finding warmth and comfort in his affection. "They ran off, annoying bastards. They vetoed being led by me, and when I got infuriated, they decided to attack me. Only when I slaughtered those damn big creatures did they retreat." He huffed in anger.
You ran your fingers through his hair and caressed him softly. "It's alright, Loki. You'll find a new army, I'm sure of it." Even though you were now firmly against his plans, you still offered him assurance.
Loki always seemed so.. Anti-villain, but to you, he was simply misunderstoodโafraid. "Thank you, Loveโyour right. I'll try to bargain with those fools. If they refuse, I'll just kill them all." He grinned.
"There's my Loki." You kissed his forehead and pushed away from his grasp. "Let's head to bed, shall we?"
You wake up stretching your arms to find no one at your side. "Loki?" You softly whisper. You sit up to see Loki dressing in his usual working clothes.
"Right. Will you be back soon?" The lack of affection you both had lately was itching in your mind.
"I'll be back soon, darling." He replied, but his face was filled with slight remorse. 'Stay.' You wanted to voice out so badly. But you couldn'tโyou didn't want to foil or deter his plans. So you nodded and waved him off.
You stood up, deciding that if he wouldn't spend time with you, you'd spend time with yourself. You started putting on a fitted t-shirt, baggy pants, and a flannel with the ends tied together. You opened the doors to your room and went straight to Heimdall.
"Hello, Heimdall." You greeted him with a tilt of the head. "Midgard?" He asked. You chuckled softly as you nodded your head. He opens the Bifrost, and you walk through it.
You walk through the shops of Midgard. They have so much variety compared to Asgard. Walking through the streets, you find a shop that particularly caught your eye.
You walk over to it, and the doors jingle. "Welcome to Darcy's Jewels!" A loud greeting was offered as you went in.
"Hello! Do you have any Gold Vermeil rings?" You inquired. The girl that assisted you smiled and pulled out a selection of rings. There were different designs, such as: butterflies, crowns, gems, and more. A shining green light distracts you from your side, and you look upon a ring. It was a plain gold ring twisted into a braid, partnered with an emerald green jem all around. The girl assisting you smiled as you pointed to the ring. You paid for it and went out, waving away from the store.
You look at the little purple bag and the red box inside it. You smiled and decided to go back to Asgard. As you were walking, you suddenly stopped. You looked to your right to see an alleywayโyou couldn't shake the feeling that someone, something, was following you.
Suddenly, a hand reached out to you in the darkness, pulling you by the arm. You yelped and held on tight to the little bag. You caught sight of the arm that grabbed you, and it looked rather..unworldly. It pinned you to the wall with the arm now covering your mouth. "Stay put, and you might live mortal."
...
Loki was in a dining hall, a tree-like table was flooded with chitauri soldiers on both sides, with Loki seated up front.
The leader of the Chitauri slammed its hand on the table. โLoki of Asgard, we refuse once more. We do not see you as fit to be a leader. Odin has refused you the throne for a reason.โ
โReally? Well, I suppose we have no other way.โ Loki took out his daggers and pointed them to the Chitauri Leader. The monster chuckled at the sight of the God of Mischief. Loki raised one of his brows slightly, but instead of inquiring, it's a How dare you? Type of eyebrow.
โYou mustโve forgotten that you still have a weakness, aesir.โ
Loki's brows furrowed, and his eyes laced with malice. โWhat did you do? What did you do to her?โ The Chitauri laughed as they saw the Godโs expression shift into a desperate plea.
You were stuck between a wall and a chitauri with one hand clutching your gift. โJust great,โ You thought.
You lifted your right leg to the chitauriโs chest and pushed him away. He grunts and launches himself forward, pinning you to the wall. You slap him with your free arm and bite his left arm. He groans, and you rush out of the alley, going thru the sea of people in the streets.
โHEIMDALL-??โ You scream, a blast of rainbow begins to ascend you. You caught a glimpse of the Chitauri running away in the other direction.
You arrive in Asgard. Huffing and trying to catch your breath. โThank you-โ
โHe is waiting for you.โ You were cut off by Heimdall speaking without glancing at you. You wordlessly try to understand what he means, a lightbulb sparking inside you. โLoki!โ You squealed, getting up and running towards the Asgardian Palace.
...
You open the doors to your quarters to find Loki standing ominously in the middle of the room. His hair was disheveled, and his face in anger. โLoki!โ You run toward him, craving his warmth after what you have been through.
โWhere have you been?โ He asked. He held you by the shoulders as you stood before him, holding onto your gift tightly.
You look at him, surprised by his tone, slightly terrifying but assuring yourself that Loki would not hurt you by any means. โO-On Midgard? Listen, the Chitaurโโ
โI KNOW. THEY TOLD ME Y/N. YOU COULD'VE BEEN KILLED OR TAKEN.โ Loki hung his head as he breathed deeply in desperation and anger.
You were surprised at his sudden outburst, โthey told him?โ You were so confused about what was happening but proceeded to calm Loki down first. โBut I wasn't killed nor taken. I'm alive. I'm right here. I'm fine.โ You say, not moving an inch from where you stood.
โ(y/n). You we're lucky- just, please, stay here. Stay inside." Loki stuttered with his words, gasping sentence's like he couldn't breathe.
You just couldn't understand, why is he acting like this? you we're safe, is that simply not enough? must he cage you? "Loki, why-"
"Because if they threaten me with you, it WILL work.โ Tears. Droplets of water fell to the floor. It was Lokiโs.
You sighed and dropped your gift to the ground. โLoki. I'm sorry to have been such a burden to you.โ You felt like you we're weakening him, holding him back from being reckless, holding him back from his true nature.
Loki lifts his face, and you see his eyes glistering with tears. โDarling, no, no. That's not what I meant.โ He cups your face and kisses your forehead. โI'm sorry, I'm so scared of losing you." He breathes out.
"You're the only thing keeping me sane. If I lose you, i won't be able to take it, i'd die without you (y/n)."
With nothing to say, you bent down and smiled softly to grab the gift. โHere, this is why I went out to Midgard.โ Loki tilted his head as he took the gift from your hands. He puts his hand in and grabs the red box.
His expression shifted to awe as he saw the gift inside it. He took it out and slipped it onto his finger, raising his hand to admire the ring. โIt's breathtaking. Thank you. Also, iโm glad youโre safe.โ He hugs you tightly, a desperate hug, a plea to never leave him.
You sighed softly. You saw the state of Lokiโs well-being and thought, โHow poisoned this man is with my love.โ
โI love you, Loki.โ You whisper. โyou have no idea.โ He responds.
Summary: Loki didnโt lack in giving you anything. He was attentive to your needs and is a surprisingly good lover. Alas, his endless gifts and spoilings leave you feeling guilty for receiving so much. You have never asked for anything specifically until one day; you had an ache to take something of his. โI must not be doing my job right if my love still wants something?โ
Loki has never failed to give you anything. Actually, most of his gifts are of his own accord. From silver jewelry to gems of every color, he gave whenever he could. You have always been grateful for it, but constantly receiving gifts knowing you can never repay them, leaves a bubbling guilt inside your stomach.
โLoveee!โ A cheerful voice enters the living room. You were sat on the kitchen counter eating fruits while the large television played a nostalgic show.
โLoki, youโre back!โ You grin. A smile you will forever greet him with everytime he comes back unscathed.
โOf course. I have a gift to present my divine goddess.โ Loki motioned to his hand. A pink paper bag he had held tightly was now waving at your face. An excited โOhโ formed at your lips as you grab whatever is inside. A soft texture arrives at your touch as you take it out. It was a fluffy textured box usually containing rings.
โLokiโฆโ You began, โI told you, I dont need THIS many gifts! Youโve given more than enough!โ You try to protest, but a hand to your face stopped your antics.
โDarling, I will spoil you as I please.โ
โYes but why must all of them be top-grade? Treasures that I cannot repay!โ You pouted, your eyebrows pressed together.
Loki grabbed your cheek and caressed it softly. โI will only ever give you gifts worth your time, sweetheart.โ Before you could exchange another sentence of noโs, the phone ringing suddenly filled the room with a repetitive chime.
Loki released his hold on you and walked further away to pick up his phone. He was speaking but it was inaudible. His facial expression created tension among his bones. Instead of wondering what they were discussing about, you instead took in Lokiโs length and the extent of his obsession with coats. His pants that were worn out from battle and a daggerโฆ
A dagger that shone gold and green, attached to his boots. The pocket being sheer enough to see through the detail of the weapon. It was by far, one of the most gorgeous daggers youโve seen Loki owned. Itโs silver hilt that had โLOKIโ engraved in little letters.
โ(y/n)?โ Your head snaps back to Loki walking to you.
โSo? What do you think of the gift?โ He grins, all the stress from his face faded away without a trace.
You nod, โits beautiful, of course. I love it. Thank you Loki.โ
Days flew by, yet the ache in your heart would not stop bubbling. Your mind had an itch you could not satisfy, a picture popping up in your mind the moment your eyes fluttered close.
You wanted that dagger. To use something of Lokiโs, something flashy yet something soft to your touch. Unfortunately, you would rather go mute than ever ask anything from him. He has simply given you way too much, things and memories you simply cannot repay.
โSomethings wrong.โ
His voice snapped your train of thought. The fruits you've been cutting have taken you atleast 20 minutes already. You hum in response before feeling his arms wrap around your waist behind you. โTell me what it is that troubles you, my sweet.โ
You bit your lip. Why on earth do you even wish for that stupid dagger? Your vanity table that had trinkets and jewelry in every box and corner, your closet filled with every type of clothing all painted in your favorite colors. Why do you want something of his? Something you barely would use anyway!
โI-,โ you shut your eyes tight. Unable to keep the frustration in.
โGo ahead.โ Loki snuggles his face onto the crook of your neck. He tightens his grip, encouraging you to go on.
โI- um, whew, I wantโฆI mean, Ive been wanting something.โ You sigh in relief, glad you could finish your sentence.
Loki releases his hold on you, turns you so that you are met with his face. His eyebrows is raised and a grin is formed by his lips. He chuckles lightly, โYou want somethingโฆโ he buries himself on your shoulder. This might just be the first time you actually ask for something specific from the God of Mischief.
โI must not be doing my job right if my love still wants something?โ He teased, yet your feelings wavered. How could he think heโs not doing his โjobโ right when heโs actually given way too much?
A louder chuckle escapes his lips as you feel him grin against you. โI had simply meant that I hoped to give you the world.โ He whispers softly, enough for you to hear.
He faces you now, grabbing you on both your shoulders. โTell me, my sweet, sweet, lover.โ He puts his point finger under your chin and tilts it slightly higher. โWhat is it that you wish for?โ
You lowered your head realizing how ridiculous your next words will sound, wanting such a simple thing yet asking for it sheepishly. โโฆdagger.โ
Lokiโs eyes lit up. He raises his hand and suddenly something shone brightly from it, he had summoned the exact dagger you wanted.
โIm glad it caught your eye. Its a special design you see, something unique from all the others.โ He grabs your hand and places the dagger inside of it just before kissing your fingers.
โRemember, everything I have is yours and soon enough, I will have, the nine realms.โ You nod as you clutched his new gift.
You were practically dragging your feet out the bedroom door. It's been about 48 Hours since you got proper sleep. Your mind wanted to collapse and your eyes were weary, but it's like your subconscious is alerted to stay awake.
You've just come back from a failed mission. A simple mission where four children were kidnapped. But for a split-second, you had your guard down and it cost the lives of the victims. You watched all of their blood spill, helpless and screaming, begging for you to help.
Every time you close your eyes, you keep remembering. It was as if the children were taunting you, their faces etched in red, telling you that you were the "hero" and yet you couldn't save them when you needed to.
You sighed deeply, finally out the door and onto the couch. You lay down, tossing and turning, your stomach straining against you and your head scratching inside your heart. You chugged down two sleeping pills and waited.
3:17AM
...
"Fuck." You muttered under your breath. You were wide awake than ever, actually.
Suddenly, you hear a knock on your door. You sit up quickly and raised both your fists. Who the hell would knock on your apartment door at this hour if not an enemy?
You take off the lock on your door and twist the knob slowly. You were ready to punch at any time, slowly, you poked your face out the door.
You couldn't really say it was a friendly face that appeared nor a foe's. Yet even so, you opened your door to its total capacity and bridged your eyebrows together as the God of Mischief smiled at you sheepishly.
"Hey, Lo'." You wearily say, not having the energy even to finish his name. You didn't even want to ask how he knew your apartment or why he was here. You were just tired.
"Hey, mortal. You look terrible than usual." Loki licked his upper lips and smirked. But it wasn't his usual smug smirk, it was soft. His eyes had a glint of...worry? or maybe you were delusional.
You looked down at him and realized he was clothed in a black turtle neck paired with black pants. Cute. Most importantly, he was holding a bag.
"Uhh? Why are you here at this time?" You asked. At this point, you gave up on the term 'sleep'.
He glanced away for a second, a tint of embarrassment in his eyes. "I heard from the others that you weren't sleeping well."
"I do not need pity, Loki." You dryly replied before attempting to close your door.
Loki placed a foot on the opening just before you could entirely close the door. "I do not pity you, y/n. I am here to offer...comfort. That is the term you Midgardians use nowadays, no?"
You raised your eyebrows, opening the door once more. "Fuck, Loki. You got me blushin' and shit."
You let him in as his grin got wider. He places the bag on the kitchen countertop as you plop yourself on the couch. You grab the remote and brush through the movies on Netflix. God, it's as if you've watched every movie already.
Suddenly you hear the crinkling of paper, and you turn to look at Loki opening a bag of popcorn. Your eyes lit up, and you smiled a bit too big.
"Now, now. Before I feed the ravenous and drowsy mortal, you should pick a movie, darling." He smirked as he put the popcorn in a bowl.
You sit back down comfortably, and flip through the movies. "What are your thoughts on Spongebob?" You suddenly ask without looking at him.
You heard him chuckle softly as he sat down next to you. "Whatever you want, princess."
He offers you the bowl of popcorn, and you grab it. He holds a blanket and hovers it over yours and his shoulder.
"You know, you and Squidward are quite alike." You bluntly say. A burst of laughter was offered as response. Loki's laughter was fucking adorable. For a brief moment, it was as if all his walls were down, and he let himself free. It was heavenly, and you were blessed to hear him laugh that way.
Silence surrounded the room, and your eyelids began to close, but for a brief moment, those memories flooded again.
Why didn't you save us?
How could you leave us there?
It should've been you.
You open your eyes in a daze. A hand was patted on your back, realizing you were breathing too fast. You subconsciously grab his arm.
"Calm down, (y/n). I'm right here, I'm right here...and I won't be leaving anytime soon." Loki's voice was filled with worry as you kept your eyes on his green ones.
Your eyes start to swell up as you squeeze on him tighter, "I fucking let them die, Loki!" A burst of tears poured out of you, but before you could wipe your face, big arms were around you.
A wave of warmth suddenly surrounded you. It was tender and sweet, making you want to cry even more.
"You did your best with the situation, y/n. There was nothing youโor we could've done." He pulled away from you and began rubbing your cheek. It was so soothing, and his gaze was unlike the Loki you knew.
"Anyone would've done what you did, darling. The other Avengers couldn't have saved them either." He pressed his lips to your temple, and your tears finally stopped.
"You did nothing wrong."
Out of all the weeks you've come to know Loki, not once did you expect him to be this soothing. His words sounded so genuine that you honestly believed him.
โThank you, Loki.โ You rub your eyes, and you lean on his chest. His movements became stiff at first before he placed his fingers on your hair,
After a minute, your eyes began to close shut, as you felt the warmth of the God surround you.
It was a silent afternoon for Loki. It was a rare silence he enjoyed on a rare afternoon. He was in the Asgardian library, one where only the sons of Odin were allowed. Books were laid on every wall, a gold color shone thru the huge clear windows. The flipping of paper could only be heard throughout the whole room.
"Loki? It's (y/n). May I sit beside you?" A face appears behind a bookshelf. A slight annoyance frowns upon Loki's face. How does a mere human call for a seat with the God of Mischief?
"How are you even here? I told the guards not to let a single soul in, for that matter." Loki said without even looking at you. You sit beside him anyway, disregarding his annoyed tone, clearly wanting to be left alone.
"I don't see you here often. That's an interesting book you picked up there." You say, trying to lighten the God's mood.ย You silently read the words on the front of the book, 'The history of Asgard.'
"Yes, I am not here often, which is precisely why I want to be left alone." Loki clicked his tongue. You sighed and laid your head on his shoulder. "Honestly, do you ever not get tired of being hostile?" You say softly.
"Get off me, woman." Even though Loki says it harshly, he could simply push you offโyet he didn't. "Mm." You hum in response.
Both of you silently sat there for a while. Once again, only the flipping of pages could be heard. After a while, Loki finally closes the book, intending to get up. He realizes that you are not moving from his actions.
"(y/n)?" He asks. He looks at you, your eyes were shut and inanimate. Loki sighs and leans back to his original position. He didn't want to wake you up, but he didn't want to waste time here, either. He contemplated on what to doโhe settled on waiting for you to wake up.
...
"WHERE COULD THAT DAMN BOOK BE!?" A boom echoed through the library as the doors were forcefully pushed open.
"You ought to keep your mouth shut, brother."
Thor looked through the bookshelves to find his brother, Loki, resting his head on you as you rested your head on his shoulders.
Thor pursed his lips close, "Apologies, brother." And silently walked away. Leaving you and Loki alone.
Unfortunately, you were awoken by the God of Thunder's voice. "Ugh, what time is it?" Your eyes flutter open, blinking once, you look to your side to find Loki's eyebrows bridged together and his arms crossed comfortably as his body leaned on you.
"I still do not understand how humans could be so vulnerable in their state of rest." He blurted out as he looked away. "Did..did I fall asleep on you? Why didn't you wake me up?" You inquired, a knot in your stomach beginning to turn.
"Do not ask me such insignificant questions." He stood up and walked awayโleaving you on the cold floor, but surprisingly you felt all too warm.
