pronoun/name validation for cas/caspian and he/him please
Caspian is such an interesting person. He is really talented and has a true knack for making people smile. His endearing personality and genuine nature makes you feel like he could be a great friend. Those close to him care for him deeply and often affectionately refer to him as Cas, because they love him for who he truly is and want to make him happy just like he makes them.
Enbies who play sports and have to deal with the clear divide between “guy” and “girl” teams are strong and awesome. No matter what team you end up on, you are still valid. Sports are sports, whatever your gender; girl football, guy basketball, girl volleyball, it’s all sports. If you want to join a team, don’t let the “gender” of it invalidate you.
I know its a silly name.. but could you do illidan with he/him and dan as a nickname?.. something about games and my bf jack..... thanks
Illidan plopped down on the couch, sliding a bit as his boyfriend, Jack, sat next to him.
“Alright,” Jack announced, spreading the contents of his arms out on the coffee table in front of them. “ I think we’re ready now. We’ve got snacks, water, controllers, a heap of assorted games, and a blanket for those devilishly cold toes of yours.” At this, he sent a mock-stern glare over at Illidan, who smirked impishly back. “Don’t give me that look, Dan! Last game night, you kept sticking those icy torture devices under my thighs.”
Illidan just rolled his eyes and floofed the blanket up in the air so it fell to cover them both. “Happy now?”
“Very,” Jack sassed, ripping open a packet of candy.
Illidan scooted forward to grab some of the candy himself as well as a controller. “So, what are we starting with?”
At this, Jack’s eyes grew bright. “Oh my gosh! Ok so you know how you’ve been practically dying while waiting for that new game to come out? Well…” he reached into the pile, pulling out a game, shiny from its still-unopened packaging, presenting it to Illidan with a flourish.
Illidan gaped, staring with disbelief at his boyfriend. There in his hands was a game that Illidan had been waiting for for months. He had watched the trailers, played the demo, and followed every bit of info he could get from the developers with an almost obsessive fervor. It was the latest in a popular series and the internet had practically exploded when it was revealed that the newest game was set to come out. Speaking of which…
“How did you manage to get this?!”
With the insane level of attention this game had garnered over the past few months, Illidan had resigned himself to the fact that there was no way he was going to get an initial copy.
“Ah, well” Jack raised a hand to the back of his neck. “I kind of camped out in front of one of the stores for like, eighteen hours to get it.”
Illidan surged forward to give his boyfriend a crushing hug. “Dude, you are the absolute best.”
Jack laughed “I know, I know. Now do you want to play this or not?”
When I was 13 I would look at blogs like this, trying to figure out how I was going to survive the world as a boy, not thinking I would. Now I just turned 20, ive been on T for 3 years, 2 years post top surgery, Ive spoken in front of hundreds of doctors at Brown University, and I have 3 transkids ages 8-15 that I take out regularly for ice cream and stuff to talk to them and help them transition. So to all those transkids out there. It gets better, no matter how much you think it won't.
I know a lot of our followers need to know that if you’re young and trans, there is a future waiting for you 💖
I've been questioning my gender a lot lately. I'm more comfortable being seen as a boy than a girl. However, I still like wearing girls clothing, and sometimes I feel quite feminine. I want a flatter chest, a deeper voice, etc. I also plan on changing my name. The pronouns I'm comfortable with seem to change, but most of the time I'm comfortable with he/him. Are there any genders that fit this description?
I can’t tell you exactly what your gender is, but here are some ideas for you to check out that seem similar to what you are describing.
From what you are describing, it seems you’re probably some gender that falls under the nonbinary umbrella. Nonbinary genders are any gender that isn’t complete guy or girl.
One gender you might want to check out is genderfluid. Genderfluids switch between multiple different genders. This could account for your change in pronoun preference/occasionally feeling more feminine than other times.
Another gender could be androgyne. Androgynes have a gender which is simultaneously male and female, though not necessarily in equal amounts.
You also might want to look at demiboy or demigirl. These are genders in which one identifies partially with boy or girl, but they don’t feel all the way connected to such labels.
If you have any further questions about any of these options or don’t really fit with any of them and are curious about some different ones, feel free to stop by again. Good luck on this journey to find your gender!
Hi! I was wondering if you were still validations? I think I think wanna try out a new name but I don't wanna tell any one like my friends and stuff yet until I have an actual idea and I thought this would help me figure it out but I wanted to ask first! Thank you in advance! ❤️
I do still do validations! I had some health issues that required me to leave this blog for a while, but I’m on much better medication now and should be able to tackle the quite sizable backlog of asks that have piled up while I was gone. If you still want to try out any new names, just drop an ask and I’ll write you a validation as soon as I can.
So the wonderful @thebeeemi messaged me with a question that I actually get asked quite a lot, in various forms, and was gracious enough to let me make a post out of the reply, so that it can be formatted for easier understanding and so that others may have access to this answer as well.
The question:
Hiya. Before I start I want you to know that I don’t want anything I say to be taken the wrong way, I accept all people. I don’t understand gender. I don’t understand what it actually is. Like what is a girl? How does someone feel like a girl? If a person with a dick feels like they have a vagina are they then a girl? A male can be feminine but that doesn’t make them a girl. I don’t understand what gives someone a certain gender. I don’t get why gender exists. I think I’m confused because I don’t know the difference between gender and gender roles/stereotypes.
My reply: (* ^ and ° indicate footnotes found at the bottom of the page)
This isn't taken at all in the wrong way, not to worry :) I encourage others to learn as much as they can about such things. (Also apologies for the late reply, my studies have frequently been carrying me to places without wifi as of late.)
To begin with, I'll explain each concept. Gender roles and stereotypes are actions, behaviors, and personality characteristics commonly associated with and expected of a specific gender. For example, gender roles indicate that men should be emotionally distant, be athletic, and dominant, while women should be sensitive, maternal, and enjoy things such as flowers or dresses. However, gender roles and stereotypes are not actually inherently linked to gender; instead they are simply the common and often harmful/restrictive* expectations of others based off of simplified cultural norms and historical conditioning. We know that these things aren't actually linked to gender because not every person fits into these stereotypes. Instead, we grow up learning that women should be “x” and men should be “z” and so we conform to such expectations over time as they combine with our own innate and acquired personality.
Gender itself is a much trickier concept, because that is, in essence, what it is- a concept. While stereotypes are expectations, gender is identity. Gender is an internal sense of self based off of many varying factors, including mental perception of self, biology, and surrounding cultural awareness of identity. These factors combine in different ways for every individual, such as those whose biological sex- including hormones, reproductive systems, and chromosomes- don’t necessarily align with their internal identity.
You are not alone in wondering why gender even exists. The simple answer^ is that it exists because humans made it. Now, this is where it becomes important for me to explain accurately, as such phrasing could be taken in the wrong way. I’ll do my best, but please, if anything remains confusing feel free to follow up with more questions. The truth is the elements that make up gender in its barest terms of ‘various internal factors working together to create something that contributes to our sense of self’ already exist naturally. Humans didn’t make those individual factors, they reside in your biological makeup, both physically and mentally. However, humans created gender as a ‘concept’. Bear with me here, as that may have sounded confusing. Think, for a moment, on race. In its barest terms, race is nothing more than various physical characteristics that were developed differently by different groups of people based off of their place of origin. However, in our world race has become much more than that. Humans took those physical characteristics that truly made race and then tied them to various other aspects such as culture, identity, shared experiences, sense of self, sense of community, and more. We developed the ‘concept’ of race. Today, race plays a pivotal role in our lives, shifting how both others and we see ourselves and our identity. Gender as a concept was developed the same way. If social development had played out differently we may not have had gender (as the concept it is seen as today). The individual, internal factors would all still be there, but we probably wouldn’t give them the same recognition and weight that we do now. It is important to note that recognizing how humans created gender does not undermine its role in our identities°. Because we recognize those factors and tie them so strongly to culture, biology, and sense of self, we end up using them as a major identifier for who we are. After all, reality is perception, to a degree, and humans are the creators of much of our own reality, even down to words themself.
Hopefully, that helps you understand the difference between gender roles/stereotypes and gender itself, including why gender exists. As stated before, this is an immensely complex subject to try and sum up. I personally have not gotten a PhD in gender studies, so I encourage you to critically examine my words and ask more questions if you feel the need, as well as doing some research of your own.
*Gender stereotypes, as with any other kind of stereotypes, become harmful when they are taken to be absolute and necessary. There is nothing wrong with girls liking traditionally feminine things or guys acting in traditionally masculine ways, the issue comes when such ideas are presented as the natural option- or rather the only option- available, thereby dismissing the vast spectrum of individuality and viewing people as groups defined by expectations rather than individual human beings.
^I say simple here because it is important to comprehend that this is a complex concept that people literally get PhDs to fully understand. I do my best to explain in a simplified, condensed format, but I would advise you do some research of your own as well. Perhaps if this intrigues you enough, you might even look into taking a gender studies course through your local community center or as an elective in your school.
°It’s really important for me to get the point across that I am not saying gender doesn’t exist. I myself am nonbinary and my gender is no less valid or less real simply because gender is a concept. This explanation of the origin of gender is to simply help people understand its nature a bit more fully, not to in any way diminish gender or any gender identity.
Could you please do a validation for Benton using he/him pronouns? It would help a lot. Thank you <3
Benton is amazing. He is so passionate about his interests and it really makes him shine. Being around Benton makes you feel like you’ve been friends for a long time, even if you’ve only just met. His personality is truly something he should be proud of. I hope that Benton will always remember, even on days that he might be a little too sad to show off his stunning smile, that he should still be happy with himself.
hi hi hi!!! could i get a pronoun validation for tetsurou with ne/nyr, they/them, its/its, ast/aster, azu/azur and glit/glitter pronouns seperately? B3 im trying to figure out what i prefer! could the theme maybe be coming out to my volleyball team as agender? i'm a middle blocker and the captain, so coming out to my team is pretty important to me! i dont mind masculine terms like boy/man/dude/bro (everyone on my team calls me bro) but i /prefer/ gender neutral ones. thank you in advance! B3c
They
Slam!
The powerful crack of the volleyball against smooth wood floor echoed around the gym.
Tetsurou landed back on the ground a second after the ball did, wearing their familiar shit-eating grin. They clenched their palms, both pink with a satisfying sting from yet another perfect shutout block.
A chorus of unhappy groans could be heard from the other side of the net, while Tetsurou’s own team cheered and taunted their opponents.
Tetsurou’s vice captain and close friend walked up and playfully slapped them on the back. “Nice one, Captain. What is that now- five shutouts in a row?” The vc grinned. “However, you might want to start easing up. Our poor first years are going to lose all their confidence never being able to spike past you.”
Tetsurou raised an eyebrow. “What’s this? You want me to go easy on the other team?” They dramatically threw a hand over their heart. “I never thought I would see the day when I was betrayed by my own vice captain. This may only be a practice match against our own teammates but how will they ever learn to win if they aren’t forced to give their all against a volleyball master such as I?” Tetsurou sniffled as if broken-hearted, all the while trying to not break into a grin. “ No, no, I’m afraid this won’t do. I’m just going to have to find a new vice captain!”
“Hey!” Tetsurou’s friend punched them in the arm and Tetsurou cracked up at the sight of their scowl.
“If you don’t mind,” one of the second years on the other side of the net drawled, “Could we resume practice now? I can’t possibly fathom how in the world you two were put in positions of responsibility.” The whole team started laughing now, and Tetsurou grinned at the good-natured ribbing.
“All right,” they called, “ I see how it is. But be prepared to lose epically. There’s no way I’m going easy on you now!”
The gym once again filled with the familiar song of sneakers squeaking on polished floor and palms smacking against the worn leather of the ball.
Tetsurou geared up to play like the rest of the team, but their mind wandered to the exchange that had just occurred and the effortless, comforting camaraderie it had shown. Tetsurou had been thinking quite a lot recently about what their team meant to them. Tetsurou loved volleyball and the people that they played it with. The team was like family. They were all ridiculously close friends that practiced together and joked together, had each other’s backs and always looked out for each other. But Tetsurou wondered… would the team still treat Tetsurou the same if they all knew? If Tetsurou ever just worked up the courage to tell everyone who they really were- what they truly were. Unfortunately, Tetsurou had a pretty good idea already of what would happen if that day ever came. They had played the scenario through a billion times in their head, and each time all they were left with was disgusted glares and mocking laughter. Tetsurou couldn’t bring themself to do it. Hiding who they were hurt, but facing the idea of losing the people most important to them was so much worse. Tetsurou grimaced at the mental image and dragged their attention back to the game just in time to hear a panicked- “Look out!”- and see the ball hurtling towards their face.
When Tetsurou blinked their eyes open, the first thing they saw was a ring of concerned faces hovering around them. Tetsurou grunted, bringing a hand up to prod gingerly at their head.
“Tetsurou?” The vice captain’s head popped into view right above their own, voice laced with worry.
Tetsurou sat up cautiously. Though they were originally a bit dizzy, the world seemed to center itself once more and the throbbing pain on the side of their head slowly abated. “I’m good. Did I pass out?”
The vice captain shook their head. “I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think so. That spike hit you right in the head and took you down pretty hard. We all rushed over here and you opened your eyes a second after that.”
A hand fell gently on Tetsurou’s shoulder and they turned to see their coach crouching beside them. “How are you feeling? Any nausea? Pain? You’ve seen enough sport-related injuries to know what I’m looking for here.”
Tetsurou shook their head. “Really, I feel fine. I’ve gotten a lot worse on the court before. I know how important it is to look after these things. If I don’t feel well, I’ll get it checked out.”
The coach gave them a searching glance for a moment before nodding, seemingly satisfied, and walking back to the assistant manager at the side of the court.
Tetsurou looked back at their teammates and spotted a gangly first year that was hovering nervously, nearly on the brink of tears.
“Was that your ball?”
The poor spiker looked like someone had just called them out on running over a puppy. They gave a small jerky nod, somewhere between terrified and miserable.
Tetsurou just grinned and made sure to look them in the eye as they said, “Nice kill. With spikes like that, we just might make it to nationals.”
The first year’s face immediately transformed into one of surprise and wonder.
Everyone’s attention was transferred quickly yet again as the vice captain clapped their hands and said, “Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for one day. We were close to the end of the match anyways, so why don’t we all call it for today. First years, pack up the equipment, everyone else can head over to start changing. Remember we have practice this weekend!”
As the other members of Tetsurou’s team slowly began to file away to fulfill their various duties, their vice captain turned back to them. They offered a hand up and Tetsurou took it, righting themself then walking together at a slow pace towards the changing rooms.
“What’s been up with you lately, bro?”
Tetsurou cringed a bit internally at the masculine name. They knew it was a term of endearment, but they still far preferred to be addressed neutrally.
“…Hey!”
Tetsurou realized with a start that their friend had still been talking to them and they had missed most of it.
“Hey, what’s up with you lately? You’ve been super zoned out and preoccupied. It’s not really great to worry that much about things in general, but you saw what happened on the court. You know it can be dangerous when you’re not paying attention.” Concern shone in their friend’s eyes.
By now the two had arrived in the dressing rooms so Tetsurou took the opportunity to turn away and hide their face under the pretense of changing shirts.
“I…it’s nothing, really. I’m fine.”
“You’re not though, and that’s a problem.” Their friend had now stepped around so they were face to face once more. “I know you. How long have we been friends? I know that you’ve been stressing hardcore about something and that it’s really been affecting you, even if you try not to show it.”
By now the confrontation had begun to attract the attention of the other teammates gathered in the small changing room. Tetsurou found it hard to meet their eyes as they grabbed their bag and closed the locker. Everyone was waiting to see what their captain would do, waiting to support Tetsurou, but Tetsurou wasn’t so sure that support would last through the revelation of their actual worry. They were so scared. Revealing something like this was such a risk. But then, a niggling doubt proposed, maybe Tetsurou wasn’t giving their teammates the credit they deserved? This team had spent so much time together. They were all so extremely close. Tetsurou thought back to the moment they had looked up from the floor to see everyone’s faces full of concern and care. Would all of that really disappear so easily?
The entire locker room seemed to have gone quiet as each player devoted their attention to Tetsurou’s look of agonized indecision. Finally, the vice captain reached out to rest a hand on their shoulder. “We’re here for you, man.”
“Not.” Tetsurou choked out.
“What?”
Tetsurou raised their eyes to look directly at their team. “I’m not a man.”
The declaration was met with surprised faces all around and Tetsurou’s heart seemed to stop as they waited for the inevitable wall of hatred to finally fall and crush them. However, as their teammate’s faces changed it wasn’t into looks of disgust but instead curiosity, support, and even some understanding.
The grip on Tetsurou’s shoulder tightened supportively and they looked over to see that their friend was still beside them. Shocked, maybe, but definitely not getting ready to punch them either.
“Umm, ok. Ok, yeah.” their friend nodded their head to themself and seemed to regain surety as they talked. “Uh, what are you then?”
Tetsurou took a shuddering breath, never before quite believing they could make it this far. In a quiet, shaky voice they explained, “I’m agender. It uh, it’s basically like I don’t really have a gender. I’m not a guy or a girl or anything else like that. Does…does that make sense?”
Some of Tetsurou’s team still looked a little confused, but others were starting to slowly nod, as if they were processing the idea.
One of the team’s wing spikers spoke up. “I’ll admit that I’ve never really heard of something like this before, and I don’t fully understand it, but I’m definitely willing to try and learn.” Many of the team nodded in agreement.
Another added sympathetically, “Wow. That’s pretty big. You must have been super nervous to share that. Thanks for trusting us.”
“I was really scared,” Tetsurou agreed. “I didn’t know how you guys would react, and so many people are really horrible or even violent about this kind of thing. I- I’m glad I did though. It feels really good being able to tell all my friends about who I really am instead of bottling it up.”
The room filled with a chorus of support.
“Of course we’re here for you! We’re a team!”
“We would never act like those judgy assholes!”
“Hey, If anyone gives you shit I’ll take them down myself! I mean, not that you probably couldn’t take them on your own anyways.”
One of Tetsurou’s closest friends from the team walked up and gave them a short hug, looking slightly embarrassed at the display of affection, but determined nonetheless. “You may not be our bro anymore, but you’re definitely still our sibling.”
The team once again nodded together and threw out more words of encouragement.
“Umm…” Tetsurou looked up to see the timid first year from before had their hand raised. “My sister’s actually trans. I mean, I know it’s not exactly the same thing, since she’s a girl and you’re not a gender at all, but it does mean that I kinda know some things about this. Is there any specific pronouns you want us to use for you?”
“I’m not exactly sure yet, to be honest. I’m still kind of figuring that stuff out.”
“Well,” the vice captain started, finally removing their hand from Tetsurou’s shoulder, “We’ll be here for you the whole time. Just feel free to talk to us instead of bottling it all up again, alright? We want to learn more and support you.”
Tetsurou smiled, feeling the last of their worries drift away. Of course their team was there for them. They had no reason to be worried this whole time. As the team finally resumed dressing and collecting their things, Tetsurou slung their bag over their shoulder and felt the warm glow of assurance deep in their chest. They were loved and valid, and their friends had just shown them how much that was true. They knew that whatever came, they would have the support of many wonderful people right behind them, helping them laugh and grow the whole way; and for now, that was all they needed.
WHew! Alright there’s a lot of different pronoun sets here so I placed all the other ones under the cut so no one had to deal with a mile long post on their dash.
(Also holy shit I have no idea how this turned into literally 2,000 words long for each individual set. It seems like every time I tried to sit down and write this validation my computer did its damndest to delete the whole thing and I guess in my writer’s rage I just powered through a whole lot more than usual without noticing.)
It
Slam!
The powerful crack of the volleyball against smooth wood floor echoed around the gym.
Tetsurou landed back on the ground a second after the ball did, wearing its familiar shit-eating grin. It clenched its palms, both pink with a satisfying sting from yet another perfect shutout block.
A chorus of unhappy groans could be heard from the other side of the net, while Tetsurou’s own team cheered and taunted their opponents.
Tetsurou’s vice captain and close friend walked up and playfully slapped it on the back. “Nice one, Captain. What is that now- five shutouts in a row?” The vc grinned. “However, you might want to start easing up. Our poor first years are going to lose all their confidence never being able to spike past you.”
Tetsurou raised an eyebrow. “What’s this? You want me to go easy on the other team?” It dramatically threw a hand over its heart. “I never thought I would see the day when I was betrayed by my own vice captain. This may only be a practice match against our own teammates but how will they ever learn to win if they aren’t forced to give their all against a volleyball master such as I?” Tetsurou sniffled as if broken-hearted, all the while trying to not break into a grin. “ No, no, I’m afraid this won’t do. I’m just going to have to find a new vice captain!”
“Hey!” Tetsurou’s friend punched it in the arm and Tetsurou cracked up at the sight of their scowl.
“If you don’t mind,” one of the second years on the other side of the net drawled, “Could we resume practice now? I can’t possibly fathom how in the world you two were put in positions of responsibility.” The whole team started laughing now, and Tetsurou grinned at the good-natured ribbing.
“All right,” it called, “ I see how it is. But be prepared to lose epically. There’s no way I’m going easy on you now!”
The gym once again filled with the familiar song of sneakers squeaking on polished floor and palms smacking against the worn leather of the ball.
Tetsurou geared up to play like the rest of the team, but its mind wandered to the exchange that had just occurred and the effortless, comforting camaraderie it had shown. Tetsurou had been thinking quite a lot recently about what its team meant to it. Tetsurou loved volleyball and the people that it played the game with. The team was like family. They were all ridiculously close friends that practiced together and joked together, had each other’s backs and always looked out for each other. But Tetsurou wondered… would the team still treat Tetsurou the same if they all knew? If Tetsurou ever just worked up the courage to tell everyone who it really was- what it truly was. Unfortunately, Tetsurou had a pretty good idea already of what would happen if that day ever came. It had played the scenario through a billion times in its head, and each time all it was left with was disgusted glares and mocking laughter. Tetsurou couldn’t bring itself to do it. Hiding who it was hurt, but facing the idea of losing the people most important to it was so much worse. Tetsurou grimaced at the mental image and dragged its attention back to the game just in time to hear a panicked- “Look out!”- and see the ball hurtling towards its face.
When Tetsurou blinked its eyes open, the first thing it saw was a ring of concerned faces hovering around it. Tetsurou grunted, bringing a hand up to prod gingerly at its head.
“Tetsurou?” The vice captain’s head popped into view right above its own, voice laced with worry.
Tetsurou sat up cautiously. Though it was originally a bit dizzy, the world seemed to balance out once more and the throbbing pain on the side of its head slowly abated. “I’m good. Did I pass out?”
The vice captain shook its head. “I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think so. That spike hit you right in the head and took you down pretty hard. We all rushed over here and you opened your eyes a second after that.”
A hand fell gently on Tetsurou’s shoulder and it turned to see their coach crouching beside it. “How are you feeling? Any nausea? Pain? You’ve seen enough sport-related injuries to know what I’m looking for here.”
Tetsurou shook its head. “Really, I feel fine. I’ve gotten a lot worse on the court before. I know how important it is to look after these things. If I don’t feel well, I’ll get it checked out.”
The coach gave it a searching glance for a moment before nodding, seemingly satisfied, and walking back to the assistant manager at the side of the court.
Tetsurou looked back at its teammates and spotted a gangly first year that was hovering nervously, nearly on the brink of tears.
“Was that your ball?”
The poor spiker looked like someone had just called them out on running over a puppy. They gave a small jerky nod, somewhere between terrified and miserable.
Tetsurou just grinned and made sure to look them in the eye as it said, “Nice kill. With spikes like that, we just might make it to nationals.”
The first year’s face immediately transformed into one of surprise and wonder.
Everyone’s attention was transferred quickly yet again as the vice captain clapped their hands and said, “Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for one day. We were close to the end of the match anyways, so why don’t we all call it for today. First years, pack up the equipment, everyone else can head over to start changing. Remember we have practice this weekend!”
As the other members of Tetsurou’s team slowly began to file away to fulfill their various duties, its vice captain turned back to it. They offered a hand up and Tetsurou took it, righting itself then walking together at a slow pace towards the changing rooms.
“What’s been up with you lately, bro?”
Tetsurou cringed a bit internally at the masculine name. It knew that was a term of endearment, but it still far preferred to be addressed neutrally.
“…Hey!”
Tetsurou realized with a start that its friend had still been talking to it and it had missed most of the conversation.
“Hey, what’s up with you lately? You’ve been super zoned out and preoccupied. It’s not really great to worry that much about things in general, but you saw what happened on the court. You know it can be dangerous when you’re not paying attention.” Concern shone in the friend’s eyes.
By now the two had arrived in the dressing rooms so Tetsurou took the opportunity to turn away and hide its face under the pretense of changing shirts.
“I…it’s nothing, really. I’m fine.”
“You’re not though, and that’s a problem.” Its friend had now stepped around so they were face to face once more. “I know you. How long have we been friends? I know that you’ve been stressing hardcore about something and that it’s really been affecting you, even if you try not to show it.”
By now the confrontation had begun to attract the attention of the other teammates gathered in the small changing room. Tetsurou found it hard to meet their eyes as it grabbed its bag and closed the locker. Everyone was waiting to see what their captain would do, waiting to support Tetsurou, but Tetsurou wasn’t so sure that support would last through the revelation of its actual worry. It was so scared. Revealing something like this was such a risk. But then, a niggling doubt proposed, maybe Tetsurou wasn’t giving its teammates the credit they deserved? This team had spent so much time together. They were all so extremely close. Tetsurou thought back to the moment it had looked up from the floor to see everyone’s faces full of concern and care. Would all of that really disappear so easily?
The entire locker room seemed to have gone quiet as each player devoted their attention to Tetsurou’s look of agonized indecision. Finally, the vice captain reached out to rest a hand on their shoulder. “We’re here for you, man.”
“Not.” Tetsurou choked out.
“What?”
Tetsurou raised its eyes to look directly at its team. “I’m not a man.”
The declaration was met with surprised faces all around and Tetsurou’s heart seemed to stop as it waited for the inevitable wall of hatred to finally fall and crush it. However, as its teammate’s faces changed it wasn’t into looks of disgust but instead curiosity, support, and even some understanding.
The grip on Tetsurou’s shoulder tightened supportively and it looked over to see that its friend was still beside it. Shocked, maybe, but definitely not getting ready to punch them either.
“Umm, ok. Ok, yeah.” their friend nodded their head to themself and seemed to regain surety as they talked. “Uh, what are you then?”
Tetsurou took a shuddering breath, never before quite believing it could make it this far. In a quiet, shaky voice it explained, “I’m agender. It uh, it’s basically like I don’t really have a gender. I’m not a guy or a girl or anything else like that. Does…does that make sense?”
Some of Tetsurou’s team still looked a little confused, but others were starting to slowly nod, as if they were processing the idea.
One of the team’s wing spikers spoke up. “I’ll admit that I’ve never really heard of something like this before, and I don’t fully understand it, but I’m definitely willing to try and learn.” Many of the team nodded in agreement.
Another added sympathetically, “Wow. That’s pretty big. You must have been super nervous to share that. Thanks for trusting us.”
“I was really scared,” Tetsurou agreed. “I didn’t know how you guys would react, and so many people are really horrible or even violent about this kind of thing. I- I’m glad I did though. It feels really good being able to tell all my friends about who I really am instead of bottling it up.”
The room filled with a chorus of support.
“Of course we’re here for you! We’re a team!”
“We would never act like those judgy assholes!”
“Hey, If anyone gives you shit I’ll take them down myself! I mean, not that you probably couldn’t take them on your own anyways.”
One of Tetsurou’s closest friends from the team walked up and gave it a short hug, looking slightly embarrassed at the display of affection, but determined nonetheless. “You may not be our bro anymore, but you’re definitely still our sibling.”
The team once again nodded together and threw out more words of encouragement.
“Umm…” Tetsurou looked up to see the timid first year from before had their hand raised. “My sister’s actually trans. I mean, I know it’s not exactly the same thing, since she’s a girl and you’re not a gender at all, but it does mean that I kinda know some things about this. Is there any specific pronouns you want us to use for you?”
“I’m not exactly sure yet, to be honest. I’m still kind of figuring that stuff out.”
“Well,” the vice captain started, finally removing their hand from Tetsurou’s shoulder, “We’ll be here for you the whole time. Just feel free to talk to us instead of bottling it all up again, alright? We want to learn more and support you.”
Tetsurou smiled, feeling the last of its worries drift away. Of course its team was there for them. It had no reason to be worried this whole time. As the team finally resumed dressing and collecting their things, Tetsurou slung its bag over its shoulder and felt the warm glow of assurance deep in its chest. It was loved and valid, and its friends had just shown it how much that was true. It knew that whatever came, it would have the support of many wonderful people right behind it, helping it laugh and grow the whole way; and for now, that was all it needed.
Ne
Slam!
The powerful crack of the volleyball against smooth wood floor echoed around the gym.
Tetsurou landed back on the ground a second after the ball did, wearing nyr familiar shit-eating grin. Ne clenched nyr palms, both pink with a satisfying sting from yet another perfect shutout block.
A chorus of unhappy groans could be heard from the other side of the net, while Tetsurou’s own team cheered and taunted their opponents.
Tetsurou’s vice captain and close friend walked up and playfully slapped nem on the back. “Nice one, Captain. What is that now- five shutouts in a row?” The vc grinned. “However, you might want to start easing up. Our poor first years are going to lose all their confidence never being able to spike past you.”
Tetsurou raised an eyebrow. “What’s this? You want me to go easy on the other team?” Ne dramatically threw a hand over nyr heart. “I never thought I would see the day when I was betrayed by my own vice captain. This may only be a practice match against our own teammates but how will they ever learn to win if they aren’t forced to give their all against a volleyball master such as I?” Tetsurou sniffled as if broken-hearted, all the while trying to not break into a grin. “ No, no, I’m afraid this won’t do. I’m just going to have to find a new vice captain!”
“Hey!” Tetsurou’s friend punched nem in the arm and Tetsurou cracked up at the sight of their scowl.
“If you don’t mind,” one of the second years on the other side of the net drawled, “Could we resume practice now? I can’t possibly fathom how in the world you two were put in positions of responsibility.” The whole team started laughing now, and Tetsurou grinned at the good-natured ribbing.
“All right,” ne called, “ I see how it is. But be prepared to lose epically. There’s no way I’m going easy on you now!”
The gym once again filled with the familiar song of sneakers squeaking on polished floor and palms smacking against the worn leather of the ball.
Tetsurou geared up to play like the rest of the team, but nyr mind wandered to the exchange that had just occurred and the effortless, comforting camaraderie it had shown. Tetsurou had been thinking quite a lot recently about what nyr team meant to nem. Tetsurou loved volleyball and the people that ne played it with. The team was like family. They were all ridiculously close friends that practiced together and joked together, had each other’s backs and always looked out for each other. But Tetsurou wondered… would the team still treat Tetsurou the same if they all knew? If Tetsurou ever just worked up the courage to tell everyone who ne really were- what ne truly were. Unfortunately, Tetsurou had a pretty good idea already of what would happen if that day ever came. ne had played the scenario through a billion times in nyr head, and each time all ne were left with was disgusted glares and mocking laughter. Tetsurou couldn’t bring nemself to do it. Hiding who ne were hurt, but facing the idea of losing the people most important to nem was so much worse. Tetsurou grimaced at the mental image and dragged nyr attention back to the game just in time to hear a panicked- “Look out!”- and see the ball hurtling towards nyr face.
When Tetsurou blinked nyr eyes open, the first thing ne saw was a ring of concerned faces hovering around nem. Tetsurou grunted, bringing a hand up to prod gingerly at nyr head.
“Tetsurou?” The vice captain’s head popped into view right above nyr own, voice laced with worry.
Tetsurou sat up cautiously. Though ne were originally a bit dizzy, the world seemed to center itself once more and the throbbing pain on the side of nyr head slowly abated. “I’m good. Did I pass out?”
The vice captain shook their head. “I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think so. That spike hit you right in the head and took you down pretty hard. We all rushed over here and you opened your eyes a second after that.”
A hand fell gently on Tetsurou’s shoulder and ne turned to see nyr coach crouching beside nem. “How are you feeling? Any nausea? Pain? You’ve seen enough sport-related injuries to know what I’m looking for here.”
Tetsurou shook nyr head. “Really, I feel fine. I’ve gotten a lot worse on the court before. I know how important it is to look after these things. If I don’t feel well, I’ll get it checked out.”
The coach gave nem a searching glance for a moment before nodding, seemingly satisfied, and walking back to the assistant manager at the side of the court.
Tetsurou looked back at nyr teammates and spotted a gangly first year that was hovering nervously, nearly on the brink of tears.
“Was that your ball?”
The poor spiker looked like someone had just called them out on running over a puppy. They gave a small jerky nod, somewhere between terrified and miserable.
Tetsurou just grinned and made sure to look them in the eye as ne said, “Nice kill. With spikes like that, we just might make it to nationals.”
The first year’s face immediately transformed into one of surprise and wonder.
Everyone’s attention was transferred quickly yet again as the vice captain clapped their hands and said, “Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for one day. We were close to the end of the match anyways, so why don’t we all call it for today. First years, pack up the equipment, everyone else can head over to start changing. Remember we have practice this weekend!”
As the other members of Tetsurou’s team slowly began to file away to fulfill their various duties, their vice captain turned back to nem. They offered a hand up and Tetsurou took it, righting nemself then walking together at a slow pace towards the changing rooms.
“What’s been up with you lately, bro?”
Tetsurou cringed a bit internally at the masculine name. Ne knew it was a term of endearment, but ne still far preferred to be addressed neutrally.
“…Hey!”
Tetsurou realized with a start that nyr friend had still been talking to nem and ne had missed most of it.
“Hey, what’s up with you lately? You’ve been super zoned out and preoccupied. It’s not really great to worry that much about things in general, but you saw what happened on the court. You know it can be dangerous when you’re not paying attention.” Concern shone in nyr friend’s eyes.
By now the two had arrived in the dressing rooms so Tetsurou took the opportunity to turn away and hide nyr face under the pretense of changing shirts.
“I…it’s nothing, really. I’m fine.”
“You’re not though, and that’s a problem.” Nyr friend had now stepped around so they were face to face once more. “I know you. How long have we been friends? I know that you’ve been stressing hardcore about something and that it’s really been affecting you, even if you try not to show it.”
By now the confrontation had begun to attract the attention of the other teammates gathered in the small changing room. Tetsurou found it hard to meet their eyes as ne grabbed nyr bag and closed the locker. Everyone was waiting to see what their captain would do, waiting to support Tetsurou, but Tetsurou wasn’t so sure that support would last through the revelation of nyr actual worry. Ne were so scared. Revealing something like this was such a risk. But then, a niggling doubt proposed, maybe Tetsurou wasn’t giving nyr teammates the credit they deserved? This team had spent so much time together. They were all so extremely close. Tetsurou thought back to the moment ne had looked up from the floor to see everyone’s faces full of concern and care. Would all of that really disappear so easily?
The entire locker room seemed to have gone quiet as each player devoted nyr attention to Tetsurou’s look of agonized indecision. Finally, the vice captain reached out to rest a hand on nyr shoulder. “We’re here for you, man.”
“Not.” Tetsurou choked out.
“What?”
Tetsurou raised their eyes to look directly at their team. “I’m not a man.”
The declaration was met with surprised faces all around and Tetsurou’s heart seemed to stop as ne waited for the inevitable wall of hatred to finally fall and crush them. However, as nyr teammate’s faces changed it wasn’t into looks of disgust but instead curiosity, support, and even some understanding.
The grip on Tetsurou’s shoulder tightened supportively and ne looked over to see that nyr friend was still beside them. Shocked, maybe, but definitely not getting ready to punch them either.
“Umm, ok. Ok, yeah.” nyr friend nodded their head to themself and seemed to regain surety as they talked. “Uh, what are you then?”
Tetsurou took a shuddering breath, never before quite believing ne could make it this far. In a quiet, shaky voice ne explained, “I’m agender. It uh, it’s basically like I don’t really have a gender. I’m not a guy or a girl or anything else like that. Does…does that make sense?”
Some of Tetsurou’s team still looked a little confused, but others were starting to slowly nod, as if they were processing the idea.
One of the team’s wing spikers spoke up. “I’ll admit that I’ve never really heard of something like this before, and I don’t fully understand it, but I’m definitely willing to try and learn.” Many of the team nodded in agreement.
Another added sympathetically, “Wow. That’s pretty big. You must have been super nervous to share that. Thanks for trusting us.”
“I was really scared,” Tetsurou agreed. “I didn’t know how you guys would react, and so many people are really horrible or even violent about this kind of thing. I- I’m glad I did though. It feels really good being able to tell all my friends about who I really am instead of bottling it up.”
The room filled with a chorus of support.
“Of course we’re here for you! We’re a team!”
“We would never act like those judgy assholes!”
“Hey, If anyone gives you shit I’ll take them down myself! I mean, not that you probably couldn’t take them on your own anyways.”
One of Tetsurou’s closest friends from the team walked up and gave nem a short hug, looking slightly embarrassed at the display of affection, but determined nonetheless. “You may not be our bro anymore, but you’re definitely still our sibling.”
The team once again nodded together and threw out more words of encouragement.
“Umm…” Tetsurou looked up to see the timid first year from before had their hand raised. “My sister’s actually trans. I mean, I know it’s not exactly the same thing, since she’s a girl and you’re not a gender at all, but it does mean that I kinda know some things about this. Is there any specific pronouns you want us to use for you?”
“I’m not exactly sure yet, to be honest. I’m still kind of figuring that stuff out.”
“Well,” the vice captain started, finally removing their hand from Tetsurou’s shoulder, “We’ll be here for you the whole time. Just feel free to talk to us instead of bottling it all up again, alright? We want to learn more and support you.”
Tetsurou smiled, feeling the last of nyr worries drift away. Of course nyr team was there for nem. Ne had no reason to be worried this whole time. As the team finally resumed dressing and collecting their things, Tetsurou slung nyr bag over nyr shoulder and felt the warm glow of assurance deep in nyr chest. Ne were loved and valid, and nyr friends had just shown nem how much that was true. Ne knew that whatever came, ne would have the support of many wonderful people right behind nem, helping nem laugh and grow the whole way; and for now, that was all ne needed.
Ast
Slam!
The powerful crack of the volleyball against smooth wood floor echoed around the gym.
Tetsurou landed back on the ground a second after the ball did, wearing asters familiar shit-eating grin. Ast clenched asters palms, both pink with a satisfying sting from yet another perfect shutout block.
A chorus of unhappy groans could be heard from the other side of the net, while Tetsurou’s own team cheered and taunted their opponents.
Tetsurou’s vice captain and close friend walked up and playfully slapped ast on the back. “Nice one, Captain. What is that now- five shutouts in a row?” The vc grinned. “However, you might want to start easing up. Our poor first years are going to lose all their confidence never being able to spike past you.”
Tetsurou raised an eyebrow. “What’s this? You want me to go easy on the other team?” Ast dramatically threw a hand over asters heart. “I never thought I would see the day when I was betrayed by my own vice captain. This may only be a practice match against our own teammates but how will they ever learn to win if they aren’t forced to give their all against a volleyball master such as I?” Tetsurou sniffled as if broken-hearted, all the while trying to not break into a grin. “ No, no, I’m afraid this won’t do. I’m just going to have to find a new vice captain!”
“Hey!” Tetsurou’s friend punched aster in the arm and Tetsurou cracked up at the sight of their scowl.
“If you don’t mind,” one of the second years on the other side of the net drawled, “Could we resume practice now? I can’t possibly fathom how in the world you two were put in positions of responsibility.” The whole team started laughing now, and Tetsurou grinned at the good-natured ribbing.
“All right,” ast called, “ I see how it is. But be prepared to lose epically. There’s no way I’m going easy on you now!”
The gym once again filled with the familiar song of sneakers squeaking on polished floor and palms smacking against the worn leather of the ball.
Tetsurou geared up to play like the rest of the team, but asters mind wandered to the exchange that had just occurred and the effortless, comforting camaraderie it had shown. Tetsurou had been thinking quite a lot recently about what asters team meant to aster. Tetsurou loved volleyball and the people that ast played it with. The team was like family. They were all ridiculously close friends that practiced together and joked together, had each other’s backs and always looked out for each other. But Tetsurou wondered… would the team still treat Tetsurou the same if they all knew? If Tetsurou ever just worked up the courage to tell everyone who ast really was- what ast truly was. Unfortunately, Tetsurou had a pretty good idea already of what would happen if that day ever came. Ast had played the scenario through a billion times in asters head, and each time all ast was left with was disgusted glares and mocking laughter. Tetsurou couldn’t bring asterself to do it. Hiding who ast was hurt, but facing the idea of losing the people most important to aster was so much worse. Tetsurou grimaced at the mental image and dragged asters attention back to the game just in time to hear a panicked- “Look out!”- and see the ball hurtling towards asters face.
When Tetsurou blinked asters eyes open, the first thing ast saw was a ring of concerned faces hovering around aster. Tetsurou grunted, bringing a hand up to prod gingerly at asters head.
“Tetsurou?” The vice captain’s head popped into view right above asters own, voice laced with worry.
Tetsurou sat up cautiously. Though ast was originally a bit dizzy, the world seemed to center itself once more and the throbbing pain on the side of asters head slowly abated. “I’m good. Did I pass out?”
The vice captain shook their head. “I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think so. That spike hit you right in the head and took you down pretty hard. We all rushed over here and you opened your eyes a second after that.”
A hand fell gently on Tetsurou’s shoulder and ast turned to see asters coach crouching beside aster. “How are you feeling? Any nausea? Pain? You’ve seen enough sport-related injuries to know what I’m looking for here.”
Tetsurou shook asters head. “Really, I feel fine. I’ve gotten a lot worse on the court before. I know how important it is to look after these things. If I don’t feel well, I’ll get it checked out.”
The coach gave aster a searching glance for a moment before nodding, seemingly satisfied, and walking back to the assistant manager at the side of the court.
Tetsurou looked back at asters teammates and spotted a gangly first year that was hovering nervously, nearly on the brink of tears.
“Was that your ball?”
The poor spiker looked like someone had just called them out on running over a puppy. They gave a small jerky nod, somewhere between terrified and miserable.
Tetsurou just grinned and made sure to look them in the eye as ast said, “Nice kill. With spikes like that, we just might make it to nationals.”
The first year’s face immediately transformed into one of surprise and wonder.
Everyone’s attention was transferred quickly yet again as the vice captain clapped their hands and said, “Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for one day. We were close to the end of the match anyways, so why don’t we all call it for today. First years, pack up the equipment, everyone else can head over to start changing. Remember we have practice this weekend!”
As the other members of Tetsurou’s team slowly began to file away to fulfill their various duties, their vice captain turned back to aster. They offered a hand up and Tetsurou took it, righting asterself then walking together at a slow pace towards the changing rooms.
“What’s been up with you lately, bro?”
Tetsurou cringed a bit internally at the masculine name. Ast knew it was a term of endearment, but ast still far preferred to be addressed neutrally.
“…Hey!”
Tetsurou realized with a start that asters friend had still been talking to aster and ast had missed most of it.
“Hey, what’s up with you lately? You’ve been super zoned out and preoccupied. It’s not really great to worry that much about things in general, but you saw what happened on the court. You know it can be dangerous when you’re not paying attention.” Concern shone in asters friend’s eyes.
By now the two had arrived in the dressing rooms so Tetsurou took the opportunity to turn away and hide asters face under the pretense of changing shirts.
“I…it’s nothing, really. I’m fine.”
“You’re not though, and that’s a problem.” Asters friend had now stepped around so they were face to face once more. “I know you. How long have we been friends? I know that you’ve been stressing hardcore about something and that it’s really been affecting you, even if you try not to show it.”
By now the confrontation had begun to attract the attention of the other teammates gathered in the small changing room. Tetsurou found it hard to meet their eyes as ast grabbed asters bag and closed the locker. Everyone was waiting to see what their captain would do, waiting to support Tetsurou, but Tetsurou wasn’t so sure that support would last through the revelation of asters actual worry. Ast was so scared. Revealing something like this was such a risk. But then, a niggling doubt proposed, maybe Tetsurou wasn’t giving asters teammates the credit they deserved? This team had spent so much time together. They were all so extremely close. Tetsurou thought back to the moment ast had looked up from the floor to see everyone’s faces full of concern and care. Would all of that really disappear so easily?
The entire locker room seemed to have gone quiet as each player devoted their attention to Tetsurou’s look of agonized indecision. Finally, the vice captain reached out to rest a hand on asters shoulder. “We’re here for you, man.”
“Not.” Tetsurou choked out.
“What?”
Tetsurou raised asters eyes to look directly at asters team. “I’m not a man.”
The declaration was met with surprised faces all around and Tetsurou’s heart seemed to stop as ast waited for the inevitable wall of hatred to finally fall and crush aster. However, as asters teammate’s faces changed it wasn’t into looks of disgust but instead curiosity, support, and even some understanding.
The grip on Tetsurou’s shoulder tightened supportively and ast looked over to see that asters friend was still beside aster. Shocked, maybe, but definitely not getting ready to punch aster either.
“Umm, ok. Ok, yeah.” asters friend nodded their head to themself and seemed to regain surety as they talked. “Uh, what are you then?”
Tetsurou took a shuddering breath, never before quite believing ast could make it this far. In a quiet, shaky voice ast explained, “I’m agender. It uh, it’s basically like I don’t really have a gender. I’m not a guy or a girl or anything else like that. Does…does that make sense?”
Some of Tetsurou’s team still looked a little confused, but others were starting to slowly nod, as if they were processing the idea.
One of the team’s wing spikers spoke up. “I’ll admit that I’ve never really heard of something like this before, and I don’t fully understand it, but I’m definitely willing to try and learn.” Many of the team nodded in agreement.
Another added sympathetically, “Wow. That’s pretty big. You must have been super nervous to share that. Thanks for trusting us.”
“I was really scared,” Tetsurou agreed. “I didn’t know how you guys would react, and so many people are really horrible or even violent about this kind of thing. I- I’m glad I did though. It feels really good being able to tell all my friends about who I really am instead of bottling it up.”
The room filled with a chorus of support.
“Of course we’re here for you! We’re a team!”
“We would never act like those judgy assholes!”
“Hey, If anyone gives you shit I’ll take them down myself! I mean, not that you probably couldn’t take them on your own anyways.”
One of Tetsurou’s closest friends from the team walked up and gave aster a short hug, looking slightly embarrassed at the display of affection, but determined nonetheless. “You may not be our bro anymore, but you’re definitely still our sibling.”
The team once again nodded together and threw out more words of encouragement.
“Umm…” Tetsurou looked up to see the timid first year from before had their hand raised. “My sister’s actually trans. I mean, I know it’s not exactly the same thing, since she’s a girl and you’re not a gender at all, but it does mean that I kinda know some things about this. Is there any specific pronouns you want us to use for you?”
“I’m not exactly sure yet, to be honest. I’m still kind of figuring that stuff out.”
“Well,” the vice captain started, finally removing their hand from Tetsurou’s shoulder, “We’ll be here for you the whole time. Just feel free to talk to us instead of bottling it all up again, alright? We want to learn more and support you.”
Tetsurou smiled, feeling the last of asters worries drift away. Of course asters team was there for aster. Ast had no reason to be worried this whole time. As the team finally resumed dressing and collecting their things, Tetsurou slung asters bag over asters shoulder and felt the warm glow of assurance deep in asters chest. Ast was loved and valid, and asters friends had just shown aster how much that was true. Ast knew that whatever came, ast would have the support of many wonderful people right behind aster, helping aster laugh and grow the whole way; and for now, that was all ast needed.
Azu
Slam!
The powerful crack of the volleyball against smooth wood floor echoed around the gym.
Tetsurou landed back on the ground a second after the ball did, wearing azurs familiar shit-eating grin. Azu clenched azurs palms, both pink with a satisfying sting from yet another perfect shutout block.
A chorus of unhappy groans could be heard from the other side of the net, while Tetsurou’s own team cheered and taunted their opponents.
Tetsurou’s vice captain and close friend walked up and playfully slapped azu on the back. “Nice one, Captain. What is that now- five shutouts in a row?” The vc grinned. “However, you might want to start easing up. Our poor first years are going to lose all their confidence never being able to spike past you.”
Tetsurou raised an eyebrow. “What’s this? You want me to go easy on the other team?” Azu dramatically threw a hand over azurs heart. “I never thought I would see the day when I was betrayed by my own vice captain. This may only be a practice match against our own teammates but how will they ever learn to win if they aren’t forced to give their all against a volleyball master such as I?” Tetsurou sniffled as if broken-hearted, all the while trying to not break into a grin. “ No, no, I’m afraid this won’t do. I’m just going to have to find a new vice captain!”
“Hey!” Tetsurou’s friend punched azur in the arm and Tetsurou cracked up at the sight of their scowl.
“If you don’t mind,” one of the second years on the other side of the net drawled, “Could we resume practice now? I can’t possibly fathom how in the world you two were put in positions of responsibility.” The whole team started laughing now, and Tetsurou grinned at the good-natured ribbing.
“All right,” azu called, “ I see how it is. But be prepared to lose epically. There’s no way I’m going easy on you now!”
The gym once again filled with the familiar song of sneakers squeaking on polished floor and palms smacking against the worn leather of the ball.
Tetsurou geared up to play like the rest of the team, but azurs mind wandered to the exchange that had just occurred and the effortless, comforting camaraderie it had shown. Tetsurou had been thinking quite a lot recently about what azurs team meant to azur. Tetsurou loved volleyball and the people that azu played it with. The team was like family. They were all ridiculously close friends that practiced together and joked together, had each other’s backs and always looked out for each other. But Tetsurou wondered… would the team still treat Tetsurou the same if they all knew? If Tetsurou ever just worked up the courage to tell everyone who azu really was- what azu truly was. Unfortunately, Tetsurou had a pretty good idea already of what would happen if that day ever came. Azu had played the scenario through a billion times in azurs head, and each time all azu was left with was disgusted glares and mocking laughter. Tetsurou couldn’t bring azurself to do it. Hiding who azu was hurt, but facing the idea of losing the people most important to azur was so much worse. Tetsurou grimaced at the mental image and dragged azurs attention back to the game just in time to hear a panicked- “Look out!”- and see the ball hurtling towards azurs face.
When Tetsurou blinked azurs eyes open, the first thing azu saw was a ring of concerned faces hovering around azur. Tetsurou grunted, bringing a hand up to prod gingerly at azurs head.
“Tetsurou?” The vice captain’s head popped into view right above azurs own, voice laced with worry.
Tetsurou sat up cautiously. Though azu was originally a bit dizzy, the world seemed to center itself once more and the throbbing pain on the side of azurs head slowly abated. “I’m good. Did I pass out?”
The vice captain shook their head. “I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think so. That spike hit you right in the head and took you down pretty hard. We all rushed over here and you opened your eyes a second after that.”
A hand fell gently on Tetsurou’s shoulder and azu turned to see azurs coach crouching beside azur. “How are you feeling? Any nausea? Pain? You’ve seen enough sport-related injuries to know what I’m looking for here.”
Tetsurou shook azurs head. “Really, I feel fine. I’ve gotten a lot worse on the court before. I know how important it is to look after these things. If I don’t feel well, I’ll get it checked out.”
The coach gave azur a searching glance for a moment before nodding, seemingly satisfied, and walking back to the assistant manager at the side of the court.
Tetsurou looked back at azurs teammates and spotted a gangly first year that was hovering nervously, nearly on the brink of tears.
“Was that your ball?”
The poor spiker looked like someone had just called them out on running over a puppy. They gave a small jerky nod, somewhere between terrified and miserable.
Tetsurou just grinned and made sure to look them in the eye as azu said, “Nice kill. With spikes like that, we just might make it to nationals.”
The first year’s face immediately transformed into one of surprise and wonder.
Everyone’s attention was transferred quickly yet again as the vice captain clapped their hands and said, “Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for one day. We were close to the end of the match anyways, so why don’t we all call it for today. First years, pack up the equipment, everyone else can head over to start changing. Remember we have practice this weekend!”
As the other members of Tetsurou’s team slowly began to file away to fulfill their various duties, their vice captain turned back to azur. They offered a hand up and Tetsurou took it, righting azurself then walking together at a slow pace towards the changing rooms.
“What’s been up with you lately, bro?”
Tetsurou cringed a bit internally at the masculine name. Azu knew it was a term of endearment, but azu still far preferred to be addressed neutrally.
“…Hey!”
Tetsurou realized with a start that azurs friend had still been talking to azur and azu had missed most of it.
“Hey, what’s up with you lately? You’ve been super zoned out and preoccupied. It’s not really great to worry that much about things in general, but you saw what happened on the court. You know it can be dangerous when you’re not paying attention.” Concern shone in azurs friend’s eyes.
By now the two had arrived in the dressing rooms so Tetsurou took the opportunity to turn away and hide azurs face under the pretense of changing shirts.
“I…it’s nothing, really. I’m fine.”
“You’re not though, and that’s a problem.” Azurs friend had now stepped around so they were face to face once more. “I know you. How long have we been friends? I know that you’ve been stressing hardcore about something and that it’s really been affecting you, even if you try not to show it.”
By now the confrontation had begun to attract the attention of the other teammates gathered in the small changing room. Tetsurou found it hard to meet their eyes as azu grabbed azurs bag and closed the locker. Everyone was waiting to see what their captain would do, waiting to support Tetsurou, but Tetsurou wasn’t so sure that support would last through the revelation of azurs actual worry. Azu was so scared. Revealing something like this was such a risk. But then, a niggling doubt proposed, maybe Tetsurou wasn’t giving azurs teammates the credit they deserved? This team had spent so much time together. They were all so extremely close. Tetsurou thought back to the moment azu had looked up from the floor to see everyone’s faces full of concern and care. Would all of that really disappear so easily?
The entire locker room seemed to have gone quiet as each player devoted their attention to Tetsurou’s look of agonized indecision. Finally, the vice captain reached out to rest a hand on azurs shoulder. “We’re here for you, man.”
“Not.” Tetsurou choked out.
“What?”
Tetsurou raised azurs eyes to look directly at azurs team. “I’m not a man.”
The declaration was met with surprised faces all around and Tetsurou’s heart seemed to stop as azu waited for the inevitable wall of hatred to finally fall and crush azur. However, as azurs teammate’s faces changed it wasn’t into looks of disgust but instead curiosity, support, and even some understanding.
The grip on Tetsurou’s shoulder tightened supportively and azu looked over to see that azurs friend was still beside azur. Shocked, maybe, but definitely not getting ready to punch azur either.
“Umm, ok. Ok, yeah.” azurs friend nodded their head to themself and seemed to regain surety as they talked. “Uh, what are you then?”
Tetsurou took a shuddering breath, never before quite believing azu could make it this far. In a quiet, shaky voice azu explained, “I’m agender. It uh, it’s basically like I don’t really have a gender. I’m not a guy or a girl or anything else like that. Does…does that make sense?”
Some of Tetsurou’s team still looked a little confused, but others were starting to slowly nod, as if they were processing the idea.
One of the team’s wing spikers spoke up. “I’ll admit that I’ve never really heard of something like this before, and I don’t fully understand it, but I’m definitely willing to try and learn.” Many of the team nodded in agreement.
Another added sympathetically, “Wow. That’s pretty big. You must have been super nervous to share that. Thanks for trusting us.”
“I was really scared,” Tetsurou agreed. “I didn’t know how you guys would react, and so many people are really horrible or even violent about this kind of thing. I- I’m glad I did though. It feels really good being able to tell all my friends about who I really am instead of bottling it up.”
The room filled with a chorus of support.
“Of course we’re here for you! We’re a team!”
“We would never act like those judgy assholes!”
“Hey, If anyone gives you shit I’ll take them down myself! I mean, not that you probably couldn’t take them on your own anyways.”
One of Tetsurou’s closest friends from the team walked up and gave azur a short hug, looking slightly embarrassed at the display of affection, but determined nonetheless. “You may not be our bro anymore, but you’re definitely still our sibling.”
The team once again nodded together and threw out more words of encouragement.
“Umm…” Tetsurou looked up to see the timid first year from before had their hand raised. “My sister’s actually trans. I mean, I know it’s not exactly the same thing, since she’s a girl and you’re not a gender at all, but it does mean that I kinda know some things about this. Is there any specific pronouns you want us to use for you?”
“I’m not exactly sure yet, to be honest. I’m still kind of figuring that stuff out.”
“Well,” the vice captain started, finally removing their hand from Tetsurou’s shoulder, “We’ll be here for you the whole time. Just feel free to talk to us instead of bottling it all up again, alright? We want to learn more and support you.”
Tetsurou smiled, feeling the last of azurs worries drift away. Of course azurs team was there for azur. Azu had no reason to be worried this whole time. As the team finally resumed dressing and collecting their things, Tetsurou slung azurs bag over azurs shoulder and felt the warm glow of assurance deep in azurs chest. Azu was loved and valid, and azurs friends had just shown azur how much that was true. Azu knew that whatever came, azu would have the support of many wonderful people right behind azur, helping azur laugh and grow the whole way; and for now, that was all azu needed.
Glit
Slam!
The powerful crack of the volleyball against smooth wood floor echoed around the gym.
Tetsurou landed back on the ground a second after the ball did, wearing glitters familiar shit-eating grin. Glit clenched glitters palms, both pink with a satisfying sting from yet another perfect shutout block.
A chorus of unhappy groans could be heard from the other side of the net, while Tetsurou’s own team cheered and taunted their opponents.
Tetsurou’s vice captain and close friend walked up and playfully slapped glit on the back. “Nice one, Captain. What is that now- five shutouts in a row?” The vc grinned. “However, you might want to start easing up. Our poor first years are going to lose all their confidence never being able to spike past you.”
Tetsurou raised an eyebrow. “What’s this? You want me to go easy on the other team?” Glit dramatically threw a hand over glitters heart. “I never thought I would see the day when I was betrayed by my own vice captain. This may only be a practice match against our own teammates but how will they ever learn to win if they aren’t forced to give their all against a volleyball master such as I?” Tetsurou sniffled as if broken-hearted, all the while trying to not break into a grin. “ No, no, I’m afraid this won’t do. I’m just going to have to find a new vice captain!”
“Hey!” Tetsurou’s friend punched glitter in the arm and Tetsurou cracked up at the sight of their scowl.
“If you don’t mind,” one of the second years on the other side of the net drawled, “Could we resume practice now? I can’t possibly fathom how in the world you two were put in positions of responsibility.” The whole team started laughing now, and Tetsurou grinned at the good-natured ribbing.
“All right,” glit called, “ I see how it is. But be prepared to lose epically. There’s no way I’m going easy on you now!”
The gym once again filled with the familiar song of sneakers squeaking on polished floor and palms smacking against the worn leather of the ball.
Tetsurou geared up to play like the rest of the team, but glitters mind wandered to the exchange that had just occurred and the effortless, comforting camaraderie it had shown. Tetsurou had been thinking quite a lot recently about what glitters team meant to glitter. Tetsurou loved volleyball and the people that glit played it with. The team was like family. They were all ridiculously close friends that practiced together and joked together, had each other’s backs and always looked out for each other. But Tetsurou wondered… would the team still treat Tetsurou the same if they all knew? If Tetsurou ever just worked up the courage to tell everyone who glit really was- what glit truly was. Unfortunately, Tetsurou had a pretty good idea already of what would happen if that day ever came. Azu had played the scenario through a billion times in glitters head, and each time all glit was left with was disgusted glares and mocking laughter. Tetsurou couldn’t bring glitterself to do it. Hiding who glit was hurt, but facing the idea of losing the people most important to glitter was so much worse. Tetsurou grimaced at the mental image and dragged glitters attention back to the game just in time to hear a panicked- “Look out!”- and see the ball hurtling towards glitters face.
When Tetsurou blinked glitters eyes open, the first thing glit saw was a ring of concerned faces hovering around glitter. Tetsurou grunted, bringing a hand up to prod gingerly at glitters head.
“Tetsurou?” The vice captain’s head popped into view right above glitters own, voice laced with worry.
Tetsurou sat up cautiously. Though glit was originally a bit dizzy, the world seemed to center itself once more and the throbbing pain on the side of glitters head slowly abated. “I’m good. Did I pass out?”
The vice captain shook their head. “I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think so. That spike hit you right in the head and took you down pretty hard. We all rushed over here and you opened your eyes a second after that.”
A hand fell gently on Tetsurou’s shoulder and glit turned to see glitters coach crouching beside glitter. “How are you feeling? Any nausea? Pain? You’ve seen enough sport-related injuries to know what I’m looking for here.”
Tetsurou shook glitters head. “Really, I feel fine. I’ve gotten a lot worse on the court before. I know how important it is to look after these things. If I don’t feel well, I’ll get it checked out.”
The coach gave glitter a searching glance for a moment before nodding, seemingly satisfied, and walking back to the assistant manager at the side of the court.
Tetsurou looked back at glitters teammates and spotted a gangly first year that was hovering nervously, nearly on the brink of tears.
“Was that your ball?”
The poor spiker looked like someone had just called them out on running over a puppy. They gave a small jerky nod, somewhere between terrified and miserable.
Tetsurou just grinned and made sure to look them in the eye as glit said, “Nice kill. With spikes like that, we just might make it to nationals.”
The first year’s face immediately transformed into one of surprise and wonder.
Everyone’s attention was transferred quickly yet again as the vice captain clapped their hands and said, “Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for one day. We were close to the end of the match anyways, so why don’t we all call it for today. First years, pack up the equipment, everyone else can head over to start changing. Remember we have practice this weekend!”
As the other members of Tetsurou’s team slowly began to file away to fulfill their various duties, their vice captain turned back to glitter. They offered a hand up and Tetsurou took it, righting glitterself then walking together at a slow pace towards the changing rooms.
“What’s been up with you lately, bro?”
Tetsurou cringed a bit internally at the masculine name. Glit knew it was a term of endearment, but glit still far preferred to be addressed neutrally.
“…Hey!”
Tetsurou realized with a start that glitters friend had still been talking to glitter and glit had missed most of it.
“Hey, what’s up with you lately? You’ve been super zoned out and preoccupied. It’s not really great to worry that much about things in general, but you saw what happened on the court. You know it can be dangerous when you’re not paying attention.” Concern shone in glitters friend’s eyes.
By now the two had arrived in the dressing rooms so Tetsurou took the opportunity to turn away and hide glitters face under the pretense of changing shirts.
“I…it’s nothing, really. I’m fine.”
“You’re not though, and that’s a problem.” Glitters friend had now stepped around so they were face to face once more. “I know you. How long have we been friends? I know that you’ve been stressing hardcore about something and that it’s really been affecting you, even if you try not to show it.”
By now the confrontation had begun to attract the attention of the other teammates gathered in the small changing room. Tetsurou found it hard to meet their eyes as glit grabbed glitters bag and closed the locker. Everyone was waiting to see what their captain would do, waiting to support Tetsurou, but Tetsurou wasn’t so sure that support would last through the revelation of glitters actual worry. Glit was so scared. Revealing something like this was such a risk. But then, a niggling doubt proposed, maybe Tetsurou wasn’t giving glitters teammates the credit they deserved? This team had spent so much time together. They were all so extremely close. Tetsurou thought back to the moment glit had looked up from the floor to see everyone’s faces full of concern and care. Would all of that really disappear so easily?
The entire locker room seemed to have gone quiet as each player devoted their attention to Tetsurou’s look of agonized indecision. Finally, the vice captain reached out to rest a hand on glitters shoulder. “We’re here for you, man.”
“Not.” Tetsurou choked out.
“What?”
Tetsurou raised glitters eyes to look directly at glitters team. “I’m not a man.”
The declaration was met with surprised faces all around and Tetsurou’s heart seemed to stop as glit waited for the inevitable wall of hatred to finally fall and crush glitter. However, as glitters teammate’s faces changed it wasn’t into looks of disgust but instead curiosity, support, and even some understanding.
The grip on Tetsurou’s shoulder tightened supportively and glit looked over to see that glitters friend was still beside glitter. Shocked, maybe, but definitely not getting ready to punch glitter either.
“Umm, ok. Ok, yeah.” glitters friend nodded their head to themself and seemed to regain surety as they talked. “Uh, what are you then?”
Tetsurou took a shuddering breath, never before quite believing glit could make it this far. In a quiet, shaky voice glit explained, “I’m agender. It uh, it’s basically like I don’t really have a gender. I’m not a guy or a girl or anything else like that. Does…does that make sense?”
Some of Tetsurou’s team still looked a little confused, but others were starting to slowly nod, as if they were processing the idea.
One of the team’s wing spikers spoke up. “I’ll admit that I’ve never really heard of something like this before, and I don’t fully understand it, but I’m definitely willing to try and learn.” Many of the team nodded in agreement.
Another added sympathetically, “Wow. That’s pretty big. You must have been super nervous to share that. Thanks for trusting us.”
“I was really scared,” Tetsurou agreed. “I didn’t know how you guys would react, and so many people are really horrible or even violent about this kind of thing. I- I’m glad I did though. It feels really good being able to tell all my friends about who I really am instead of bottling it up.”
The room filled with a chorus of support.
“Of course we’re here for you! We’re a team!”
“We would never act like those judgy assholes!”
“Hey, If anyone gives you shit I’ll take them down myself! I mean, not that you probably couldn’t take them on your own anyways.”
One of Tetsurou’s closest friends from the team walked up and gave glitter a short hug, looking slightly embarrassed at the display of affection, but determined nonetheless. “You may not be our bro anymore, but you’re definitely still our sibling.”
The team once again nodded together and threw out more words of encouragement.
“Umm…” Tetsurou looked up to see the timid first year from before had their hand raised. “My sister’s actually trans. I mean, I know it’s not exactly the same thing, since she’s a girl and you’re not a gender at all, but it does mean that I kinda know some things about this. Is there any specific pronouns you want us to use for you?”
“I’m not exactly sure yet, to be honest. I’m still kind of figuring that stuff out.”
“Well,” the vice captain started, finally removing their hand from Tetsurou’s shoulder, “We’ll be here for you the whole time. Just feel free to talk to us instead of bottling it all up again, alright? We want to learn more and support you.”
Tetsurou smiled, feeling the last of glitters worries drift away. Of course glitters team was there for glitter. Glit had no reason to be worried this whole time. As the team finally resumed dressing and collecting their things, Tetsurou slung glitters bag over glitters shoulder and felt the warm glow of assurance deep in glitters chest. Glit was loved and valid, and glitters friends had just shown glitter how much that was true. Glit knew that whatever came, glit would have the support of many wonderful people right behind glitter, helping glitter laugh and grow the whole way; and for now, that was all glit needed.
Do you think it is okay to come out as agender your friend. Just a few weeks after they came out as Bigender and they gave out their pronouns. But yet you keep forgetting and correcting yourself. I dont want to "steal" the spotlight off of their gender identity, nor do i want to mock it and I dont want them to be mad if I ask them to call me a pronoun when I ke3p forgetting theirs.
This is absolutely ok! There’s not some set limit on how many people are ‘allowed’ to be nonbinary. It just doesn’t work like that. So you both happened to come out around the same time. Lucky coincidence, but not a big deal and your friend should recognize that. Or even better, be thrilled about it.
I know when I first came out to my friend group about my sexuality, one of my best friends approached me a week later and said they had been thinking and how I felt sounded a lot like how they had always felt. Turns out we were both pansexual. I didn’t see that as stealing the spotlight. Being yourself is not a performance that is only allowed one star at a time. I was thrilled that I had a friend who would be able to understand me so closely!
As for messing up with their pronouns, that’s just something you have to work on. It’s unfortunate but understandable that you don’t get them right 100% of the time. It takes a little bit of time for your brain to get used the change, and that is ok as long as you are respectful about it and strive to always get better. Chances are, your friend might mess up on your preferred pronouns sometimes too.
I wish your friendship and coming out the best of luck!
Can I get a they/them pronoun validation for Vic? Thank you!
Vic stood tall and relaxed, a lone figure in the middle of a field. They felt a slight breeze brush their cheek. It sent waves of grass rippling around their bare feet, tickling their toes. They inhaled and exhaled to the steady sway of the air around them. With each breath they felt the worries of their everyday life drifting out of them, as if carried away by the wind. Here, there was no one around to expect anything from them, no responsibilities to worry about or judgements to endure. Vic smiled and raised their face to the sun, feeling it’s warm rays bathe over their cheeks. They realized that this was how their life should truly be. Yes, there would always be worries-new issues or ignorant people to deal with- but Vic felt that they could at least keep this feeling with them inside. There was no need to let the judgments of others weigh them down. Vic was proud of themself. They knew that they were a strong, valid individual that could handle whatever life threw at them. They deserved to feel happy and safe, and they weren’t going to let anyone take that away from them.
I hope that all people, gay, lesbian, or bisexual, who have been victims of homophobic attacks or bullying have a nice, safe day. The hatred of other people does not define you, and your love is beautiful, untouchable.
I hope that all trans people who have been victims of transphobic attacks or bullying have a nice, safe day. The hatred of other people, including the people who reblogged this, does not define you. Your identity and your love is beautiful, untouchable.
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