Muri-I MEAN INSPECTOR CONSTABLE

[37th-order-scrivener]

are aziraphel and Crowley ya know… screwing

well....I've seen mr crowley-i mean the demon tightening the screws on his car, but mr aziraphale never helped him

[your-local-cryptid-049]

that’s not quite what I meant but okay… maybe check the urban dictionary in your free time

https://www.urbandictionary.com/browse

[37th-order-scrivener]

ok! will this dictionary have words that mr. aziraphales don't?

[37th-order-scrivener]

what's a dick?

[your-local-cryptid-049]

oh okay... um do you know what adam looked like, like before he ate the forbidden fruit

[37th-order-scrivener]

no, that wasn't my job. I was in records

[lilisouless]

Kaz: she is obviously me, I am the only one here that would actually solve the trial by all the hints

Wylan: are you dense? Its a rich girl underestimated that goes and prove herself, it’s my story, so she is obviously me

Jesper: hello? I am the only one here who went to law school AND has knowledge on style and sense of it , so she is ME

Matthias: the name is legally blonde! I am the only blonde here!

Kuwei: are…they arguing over…

Nina eating popcorn: who is our group’s Elle Woods, yes

Inej siping on her drink: we dont have the heart to tell them the movie is more about a misogynistic dichotomy than actual hair color discrimination so none of them can truly be Elle

Kuwei: aren’t you two going to join?

Nina: nah, I am obviously a Cher Horowitz

Inej: and I am Batman

[37th-order-scrivener]

are aziraphel and Crowley ya know… screwing

well....I've seen mr crowley-i mean the demon tightening the screws on his car, but mr aziraphale never helped him

[your-local-cryptid-049]

that’s not quite what I meant but okay… maybe check the urban dictionary in your free time

https://www.urbandictionary.com/browse

[37th-order-scrivener]

ok! will this dictionary have words that mr. aziraphales don't?

[37th-order-scrivener]

what's a dick?

[37th-order-scrivener]

are aziraphel and Crowley ya know… screwing

well....I've seen mr crowley-i mean the demon tightening the screws on his car, but mr aziraphale never helped him

[your-local-cryptid-049]

that’s not quite what I meant but okay… maybe check the urban dictionary in your free time

https://www.urbandictionary.com/browse

[37th-order-scrivener]

ok! will this dictionary have words that mr. aziraphales don't?

[the-lady-stardust28]

Two sides of being a lesbian.

.

[37th-order-scrivener]

what's a "lesbian"?

[your-local-cryptid-049]

people of the island of lesbos of course

[37th-order-scrivener]

oh yes, I read some poems written by someone from that island. they were wonderful

[37th-order-scrivener]

are aziraphel and Crowley ya know… screwing

well....I've seen mr crowley-i mean the demon tightening the screws on his car, but mr aziraphale never helped him

[37th-order-scrivener]

I know who you are.

I'm still inspector j. constable. what is my middle name? well its just a j really

[queerbookbitch]

hi y'all! I will not have access to internet starting Sunday(jun 28) so all of my blogs will be on a hiatus. I'll be back July 25th!! I'll miss you guys, you can still send asks and interact as normal, I just won't be able to answer them

[37th-order-scrivener]

i know what you are.

*sweating nervously* a human police officer?

[kaydncowboy]

Queer - Wikipedia

Non-binary - Wikipedia

Lesbian - Wikipedia

[37th-order-scrivener]

oh wonderful! I've been hearing these terms from the other shopkeepers, so now I can find out what they mean!

[37th-order-scrivener]

I don't know what you are

well so you know I'm a human police officer!

[37th-order-scrivener]

i know what you are.

*sweating nervously* a human police officer?

[grapefruit-offical]

i am a grapefruit

what are you 🫵?

[astronaut-offical]

i am an astronaut

what are you 🫵?

[sharks-offical]

I am a shark

what are you 🫵?

[weirdo-offical]

i am a weirdo

what are you 🫵?

[the-pancake-dicegoblin]

I am a nerd

What are you? 🫵

[37th-order-scrivener]

I'm a human police officer!

[37th-order-scrivener]

I found this website called "our archive" and I worked in the archives in heaven- I mean before I was a human police officer, so I looked at it

I saw something mentioning mr aziraphale and mr crowley, so i read it(after all, if books are so lovely, surely this other version of them will be just as nice)

and it wasn't bad exactly, it was quite well written, but mr crowley and aziraphale were doing...something

I'm not quite sure what, but it was...something

and so many of them were talking about them doing...whatever it is

they kept using the word "smut"

does anyone know what that means? it isn't in any of mr aziraphales dictionaries

[37th-order-scrivener]

everyone on wickber street is putting up rainbows and talking about "pride"

I thought that was a sin, but after looking through mr aziraphales books(he has so many on this topic!) it turns out its a human festival about people loving each other and being themselves! which is very strange because some people are saying its a sin, and that The Almighty hates it, which is really weird because no she doesn't

I mean her plan is ineffable but hating on people who want to smush their mouths with someone of the same gender isn't part of it

so...happy pride! (is that what I'm supposed to say? did I do it right?)

[the-lady-stardust28]

Two sides of being a lesbian.

.

[37th-order-scrivener]

what's a "lesbian"?

[37th-order-scrivener]

I see...

um...what that? love I mean

@a-zira-ziraphale-fell

[37th-order-scrivener]

this is odd

mr crowley and aziraphale went up to one of the rooms in the bookshop, and they sent me to go inspect some humans (which I always do because I am a human police officer) but I realized I forgot my hat in the book shop, and when I came back they were making some...interesting sounds...I'm not quite sure what they were doing.

I thought at first they were in pain, but it didn't sound quite like that. after a little while they came back, and aziraphale was fiddling with his tie, and they seemed to be fine. though now that I think about it, crowley did have some purple ish marks around his neck.

does anyone know what they were doing? were they in danger?