Aeternal Danube @aeternaldanube - Tumblr Blog

My bank was out of fucking envelopes. They gave me a Halloween bag full of money. I told them I felt like I was robbing the place.

reallifeishorror

This is the lucky tall Betsy. Reblog and within 24 hours and lucky tall Betsy will grant you an irrelevantly festive bag full o’ moneys.

Haha

mendelsohnben

during the 69th Cannes Film Festival awards ceremony

sculptureoflimitations-deactiva

Mads is legit going to have him for dinner.

gooodlongtime

kirrys

the million dollar question!

badfoodnetworkpuns

FINALLY. A professional chef that’s not shitting on food us plebians eat. Alton, I think you can learn a little something from this man

old-castle-canary

These X-Men filters 👌🏻 My favorite one is the Nightcrawler filter 😈

cacodaemonia

These bizarre images, created by users via Russian website Ostagram, are the product of an art technique known as Inceptionism, where images are combined using neural networks to generate a single mind-bending picture.

hyperchaotix

Whoa what the fuck

roachpatrol

HOLY SHIT I LOVE THIS

gmbencompetence

We need to have a nomination for “Stupidest thing Tumblr.com has ever believed” and just move into an official Top 10 List.

For my nominations, I’m putting up:

If you eat a chocolate bar a very specific way, you will break physics and get infinite chocolate.

or

It is impossible that you spelled “Berenstain Bears” wrong and is, instead, more likely that the universe fractured into separate, overlapping realities in the last 20 years.

I can’t decide which is more beautiful. It’s why we need a vote.

jupiterjunebug

this is a picture of the human brain at the moment of death. tragic and beautiful

gmbencompetence

Fuck. That is a damn good nomination.

thisisdefinitelyacreativename

if you close your eyes when the train hits your brain will assume you are dead. Some find this comforting.

gmbencompetence

We’re getting into the good ones now. This is some classic Tumblr.

turtle-powered

Two old favourites:

“Bitch, That’s the Tubby Custard Machine” (http://imgur.com/gallery/IObQF)

and the horse dildo that was passed off as someone’s arm. (http://abakkus.tumblr.com/post/48958415162)

gmbencompetence

This is rapidly becoming a master post of ignorances and I could not possibly be happier.

analienorsutin

Rare blue watermelon

sickofimmortality

That disease where you get purple eyes, no period, and no body hair

akiraita

How have we gone this far without anyone mentioning the bird in the chocolate fountain

unicornfan

soap makes water molecules smaller

elphabaoftheopera

I nominate the “we are killing the earth” picture of the earth in comparison from 1978 to 2012

brucebocchi

the dog with the slice of ham on its face that everyone thought was a gigantic burn scar

adataraxia

“Tequila is the only alcohol thats not a depressant so you can drink as much of it as you like”

softurl

sasukehateblog

that post with the picture of the joker without makeup and people thinking it was a real person and defending him

painisthecleanser

that photo of voldemort being passed off as an aborted fetus

stankyleg-deactivated2918973

The two way mirror

rinlockhart

“listen here, cumslut.”

tenaflyviper

I can’t believe you guys forgot someone trying to pass off a picture of the inside of a fig as a microscopic view of the inside of a vagina.

steven-universe-official-deacti

Eliminate tumblr.

theapplebane-deactivated2016071

pls kill tumblr

some-online-spiral

has no one mentioned the time when someone tried to defend mayonnaise as a gender?

furlockhound-inactive-moved-dea

The people that argued the inside of a red, meaty fruit should be tagged gore because vaguely looked like a bloody wound if you squinted at it.

official-albert-wesker-deactiva

You mean this post Slagar?

furlockhound-inactive-moved-dea

That’s the one.

letsboldlygomotherfuckers

tag your gore/pomegranates asswipe

theinturnetexplorer

Disney Hero-Villain Faceswaps

sashayed

And in time it came to pass that Leonardo DiCaprio, who was already a millionaire, won his meaningless bobblehead for playing pretend in some snow. And the LORD spake then unto the people, saying: “Lo, I have granted thy prayers: be content therefore, and obey the LORD thy God, and make no more memes.” But the people were foolish and sinful, having made idols of the Meme, and heeded not the voice of the LORD: and the new memes were plentiful and did multiply. And the LORD spake unto them again, saying “Please, stop: this hath not been funny since like 2013, if then.” But the people ignored him, for they were on their phones, tweeting #FINALLY LOL 😂😂😂😂. And the LORD regretted then that he had made man: and wise men likewise regretted that they had been made.