A Blog of Beautiful Things @anxietyismymood - Tumblr Blog

odin is like “when thor was born the sun shone bright upon his beautiful face. i found loki on the sidewalk outside a taco bell”

chromalogue

Oðinn spake:

Bright the sun shone | at the time of Þor’s birth, And bathed his count'nance fair. Loki, wolf-father, | the trickster, the liar, I found on the cold pavement While returning in glory | from a grand hunt For a 3 AM quesadilla.

baegishjalmur

@damn-fuck-i-burnt-myself-again

systlin

I need this framed on my wall it’s so beautiful.

retro-minty

@theshitpostcalligrapher

theshitpostcalligrapher

ay @systlin hmu

bold-sartorial-statement

@systlin

My husband complained that this was more Shakespeare than Eddas, and I challenged him to do better.

Solen sken, skönt gyllene

Dagen Tor föddes

På trottoaren, vid Taco Bell

Där låg Loke

—KJN

My translation:

The sun shone, sweet golden

The day of Tor’s birth

On the tarmac, by Taco Bell

There lay Loki

(For poetry reasons, Thor needs the Swedish spelling.)

theshitpostcalligrapher

@bold-sartorial-statement

ay yo show ur husband

andersonsallpurpose

@bold-sartorial-statement no but hang on this should be in runes:

(oops spot the typos)

svampurinn

i wanna translate this into icelandic so imma do it

Sólin skein, björt og gullin við fæðingu Þórs á stígnum við Taco Bell Þar lá Loki

books-and-candy-ples

The amount of quality going into these shitposts is amazing

rembrandtswife

This is not shitposting, this is transformative work!

deeranger

And in Danish because why not:

Solen skinnede, skøn og gylden

På dagen for Tors fødsel

På asfalten ved Taco Bell

Dér lå Loke

“LEV MERE (LIVE MAS)”

*Snorts*

marvel-lous-things

When Thor born

He hair shine brite

A very very

Magical site

But then I see

A bab from hell

I pik up loki

From taco bell

worldlykid

I found this really important tiktok about what to do if a Jehovah's Witness or Morman missionary comes to your door:

thefriendlyneighborhoodpervert

I spent some time in a Jehovah's Witness church. They're exceptionally skilled at recruiting people into their church. (And I was an ATHEIST)

I left after a couple months, I stayed just long enough to see that they explicitly believe women are inferior to men, and of course, that homosexuality is a sin on par with murder.

The whole missionary door to door thing is NOT how Jehovah's Witnesses recruit. That is how they convince their members that the world is out to get them. One of the first things they teach is that Jesus requires you to try to convert non Christians to the faith. (They say non Christian but mean non JW.)

Then they say, "look how people treat us, just for the crime of wanting to save their soul"

They have long time church members tutor the incoming members to smooth the process over. They're trained to smooth away any doubts you may have about the church.

It is a textbook cult but because it's a Christian cult, nobody will do anything about it.

gottalovecatss

I just wanted to share, in case no one realizes how messed up JW can be, my family only left after the elders followed around my teenage aunts and other young women to "ensure they weren't sinning" and my great-grandparents STILL stayed!

americasdreambabe-deactivated20

Exmormon here, this is TRUE, to reiterate from satanslover above, “The whole missionary door to door thing is NOT how Jehovah's Witnesses recruit. That is how they convince their members that the world is out to get them.”

The same is true of mormonism. I know how annoying the missionaries are, but please take just ten seconds to be polite to them instead, please support cult victims 💖💖

snackwizard

a fools guide to not wanting to die anymore

by me, a fool who doesnt wanna die anymore

never make a suicide joke again. yes this includes “i wanna die” as a figure of speech. swear off of it. actually make an effort to change how you think about things.

find something to compliment someone for at least 4 times a day. notice the little things about the world that make you happy, and use that to make other people happy.

talk to people. initiate conversation as often as you possibly can. keep your mind busy and you wont have to worry anymore

picture the bad intrusive thoughts in youe head as an edgy 13 year old and tell them to go be emo somewhere else

if someone makes you feel bad most of the time, stop talking to them. making yourself hang out with people who drain you is self harm. stop it.

wildlyannoyingdoofus

… 8|

That’s some pretty good advice. I don’t know what’s left of my humor after ‘guess I’ll just die’ jokes but it’s worth a shot.

snackwizard

Personally i went from “guess I’ll die” jokes to “IF I HAVE TO BE HERE FOR 5 MORE MINUTES I PROMISE YOU I WILL BUY JUST, AN ARRAY OF CLOTHES.” and other wild hyperbolic stuff. Just replace the death part with something ridiculous and off topic. Its very entertaining

808lien

This also works with calling myself things like stupid, worthless, trash, etc. Even if you do this jokingly to yourself, your brain still believes it, and keeps up the cycle. Seriously, I found that when I stopped saying these things about myself, even jokingly, it made a massive difference.

maramahan

Here’s a tip I picked up from a friend that’s helped me a lot — replace self deprecating jokes with ironically self aggrandizing jokes

Like every time I trip and fall, instead of saying “l’m just a disaster human” I say “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”

Or like, when I draw a picture I’m not 100% happy with, instead of saying “my art is trash” I say something like “you know I think it’s time we replaced the Mona Lisa”

When you do that you get to make a joke, but you’re ALSO getting practice building yourself up, y’know?

And eventually it becomes a reflex and you get so used to it that you can say nice stuff about yourself even when you AREN’T joking

jkl-fff

scottjate

This is so important

graylinesspam

That self-aggrandizing technique is no joke.

I replaced “I’m stupid” with “I’m a God damn genius.” “Move over newton” “another masterpiece”

I replaced “gross/ disgusting” with “sexy/attractive” “the hight of elegance”

I replaced “I suck/ that sucked/ this is bad” with “fantastic”, “a lovely time”, “ swell/jolly good”

Replace every negative with a positive. Say it so sarcastically. Make it complicated make it entertaining have fun with it.

It will stop your self deprecating and build confidence. And people are more easygoing around you.

feralphoenix

#a good stopgap is being neutral rather than negative/positive #when i drop smth at work i just say #ah… gravity. #and move on (tags by @whatever-you-can-give-me )

^^^ to those of you who complain that it feels weird or uncomfortable or not genuine to immediately switch to self-aggrandizement, try this instead!!! nobody on this post is kidding that it helps - you’re basically building a manual override for the mental pathways your brain is used to so you can switch those train tracks

airiervessel

@tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors

greelin

“i don’t understand how you just get so much stuff done under pressure and like don’t freak out” i just go into autopilot bro like i genuinely do not know what happens in high volume situations. i let my body deal with that shit. not for me

greelin

if you completely block off a whole portion of your mind you’ll find that it is actually quite peaceful and you can move very fast, almost ungodly so, and achieve a lot while feeling absolutely nothing

greelin

i have been informed that this is not how normal people process and handle stress.… . dam that shit’s crazy. sorry y’all have to deal with it in like a rational healthy way

findingfeather

So for the record as both a long-term user of this feature and someone who had what I’m about to talk about happen to her:

If you rely on this too much you are at ever increasing risk of it not working anymore, very abruptly, at a really horribly inconvenient time.

You are also at risk of it working less and less over time when you have no other coping mechanisms in place.

And finally even if it continue to work, you are doing continual damage to your ability to handle non-crisis situations! And increasing the chance that you will start unconsciously turning everything into a crisis.

All three of these options are Sub-Optimal, to say the least.

(this is because this method is essentially harnessing the dissociative capacity of the brain for moments of extreme trauma more or less At Will except the will involved amounts to convincing your amygdala to let go of the right juices by convincing it that the tiger is in fact right there. It can be a superpower! But it’s also, well. Risky. If you find yourself literally doing it for everything, be aware that it’s kind of like running an engine at max at all times without ever really replenishing the oil. Eventually you will start burning shit.)

punkinspicelattes

I think there’s potentially one more option that occurs if you’re *especially* good at this, and it’s that your threshold for “crisis” unconsciously becomes higher and higher.

Oh, you wrote that paper in a week no problem? Now it’s not a crisis until three days before.

That worked okay? Now it’s not a crisis until the day before.

That worked out too? Hey, now the crisis point isn’t until *the day of*.

This is how I ended up writing a 30 page PhD level literature review in 12 hours—and presenting on it the next day—during finals week. And you know what? That sucked! It almost just didn’t happen!

Because at some point, your brain is going to just believe nothing is a crisis anymore. It fails to recognize pain. And pain is important, because it’s a sign that something has gone deeply, deeply wrong. If you believe that nothing is a crisis, *you will not know you’re in a crisis situation until you’ve fallen off the cliff of what is possible*. You will not recognize the pressure you’re under until it’s crushing you, and possibly not even then.

And this doesn’t just affect your work or school; you don’t recognize these signs in your relationships either, and it primes you to be able to take whatever others may do to you. It’s not even that it lowers your self esteem and makes you believe that you deserve it—you literally just cannot recognize when situations are harmful anymore. Have you ever told someone a “funny” story from childhood and they look at you and reply “holy shit, I’m sorry you went through that?” Yeah, that’s your whole life now.

If this sounds dire, it’s because it is. Do NOT let yourself get to this point if you can.

findingfeather

Excellent addition.

kelpforestdwellers

it can also make you permanently physically sick. constantly going through high stress situations causes a repeated cascade of stress hormones, which in the long term can affect the immune system, sleep, GI system, and by extension basically all your body’s functions.

this can wear you down, and it can also make you more vulnerable to other factors. like if you are already worn down and then move into an apartment with a mold problem, or catch a virus.

we’re all familiar with ‘long covid’ now, but even relatively benign viruses that most people recover from completely, like mononucleosis, can trigger long term or permanent illness with severity that ranges from ‘can work full time but not socialize’ to ‘bedbound in a dark room.’ you can look up ME/CFS and dysautonomia for more information.

you are FAR less likely to become permanently sick after a virus if you rest completely during the acute phase. and by 'rest’ i don’t mean 'studying, but in bed’ or even reading, watching TV, or socializing. i mean lying flat, eyes closed, in the dark, as much as possible and more than you think is necessary. if you can’t tolerate silence, calm music or a podcast or audiobook is better than more stimulating activities like TV.

it sucks, but ~6 weeks of doing a lot of nothing is better than a lifetime of that.

this also ties in with the above mindset because, in addition to becoming more vulnerable due to the physiological consequences of prolonged stress, people who are deep in that mode of operation are much more likely to push themselves to continue to work/study/socialize etc while they’re sick with an acute illness.

so yeah. if you recognize yourself in the above posts, try to get out of it before you experience permanent harm.

how to do that is more complicated and i think inherently individual. therapy may help if that’s something you vibe with. i hate to say it but i’ve found meditation helpful with learning to step out of emergency mode brain, but it took a lot of experimenting to find techniques that didn’t just stress me out more.

i think whatever practices you can cultivate to prioritize taking care of yourself, learning to ask for help, and slowing down and prioritizing comfort and rest may help.

justlittlefrogthings

I drink poison just because it doesnt hurt me and it makes you so mad

oof-i-did-it-agaaiiin

aprillikesthings

Before I argued with a shit ton of landlords and wannabe landlords: I think we should strengthen tenant’s rights and enforce our existing tenant protection laws better, and increase our housing benefits.

After spending too much time arguing with landlords and wannabe landlords: Fuck it. It should be illegal to own homes you don’t live in. If you won’t sell to the people renting from you, people should forcibly take your property. All landlords are parasites.

aprillikesthings

"iF yOu DoN't LiKe ReNtInG jUsT bUy A hOuSe"

Houses in my city go for, like, $500k. I can't. Housing prices in the US have skyrocketed while wages have stagnated. That is in fact the problem--most people cannot afford to buy a house, and many people pay more than half their income in rent. Ever saved up for a down payment on a house while doing that?

"mOvE iF yOu DoN't LiKe YoUr LaNdLoRd"

Moving is expensive and stressful. There's no guarantee of finding another place within reasonable distance of where we work, where we buy groceries, etc.

"bUt If LaNdLoRdS dOn'T rEnT oUt HoUsInG wHeRe WiLl PeOpLe LiVe?!"

If landlords/property companies all were forced to sell every place they owned except housing they specifically lived in, the market would have such a glut of housing that prices would nosedive in nearly every city in the US, possibly to the point where normal, average working people could buy one. Houses and apartments do not blink out of existence because a landlord stops renting them out. Why do I see this dumbass line of logic so fucking often.

People literally cannot wrap their minds around the fact that landlords (and I include property companies--the kind that own multiple apartment complexes--as landlords) don't create or do anything of value. "But when I need the water heater fixed, the landlord fixes it." Except for some mom'n'pop landlord operations that insist on DIY'ing everything, your landlord is not the one who is fixing it. The person who physically comes to your unit and fixes it is the person who fixes it, and your landlord is just an expensive gatekeeper who decides for you whether you actually need your water heater fixed. If you owned the place you could have insurance against that kind of thing, you could put money in a co-op that pays for that kind of thing (like condo associations do), or you could just pay out of pocket for it if you have the money. If you did take on the risk of repairing it yourself, the only person who would suffer is you. But you wouldn't be at the mercy of some dipshit who tries desperately not to get your water heater fixed (even though that's illegal), or who hires the cheapest person they could find (who might suck ass and make it worse), or insists on doing it themselves (whether they know what they're doing or not).

HUMANS REQUIRE SHELTER TO SURVIVE. The modern standard for housing includes things like locking doors, ceilings and windows that don't leak, walls that aren't covered in mold, and working electricity, plumbing, and hot water at a bare minimum. On top of that, we need shelter that's near enough to our place of employment and places to buy food, etc.

Landlords do not provide housing. They hold it ransom for as much money as they think they can get, because they know we need housing to survive. They buy up as much housing as they can (reducing the supply of available houses for sale) and then rent them out at a profit (which means more than they're paying on the mortgage, if they have one). They are hoarding housing, creating a false scarcity, and then profiting off of it.

Landlords are parasites.

sobadpink

Landlords “provide homes” the same way ticket scalpers “provide concerts”

sabelmouse

This fake yarn is supposedly better for sheep.

Aimed at people who don’t know where wool comes from, it’s 100% plastic. Yes, plastic.

So any garment you wash will release microfibres into the sea. It’ll never decompose.

You’re supposed to believe that sheep shearing is violent and cruel. There are imbeciles out there that work in an unprofessional manner while shearing, but that’s not the case overall.

Sheep don’t suffer from having their fleece removed.

Left on, the fleece can become a home for fly eggs and the subsequent maggots which can eat the sheep. Chemical treatments are available to prevent that happening. It’s much better for the sheep, the land and the farmer to avoid chemical use.

Don’t be fooled. Wool is a sustainable material, one we should make more and better use of.

scrimblobimblobadimbo-deactivat

Any garment you wash will release microfibres into the sea. It’ll never decompose.

This is very important.

godesssiri

And you need to wash acrylic wool garment more often than natural wool. They get stinky way more easily.

ruusverd

In my almost-decade of owning sheep, there have been exactly two(2) bad shearers try to start up in the area. Know what happened? The first farm they went to called every other shepherd in the area and said “This guy cut one of my sheep and didn’t think it was a big deal, don’t hire him.” And neither of them ever did business in the area again.

Some farmers are less conscientious than they should be about taking care of their stock, and the occasional tiny nick will happen, but no one is going to hire a shearer who is a) incompetent enough and b) uncaring enough to actually injure the animals to the point of bleeding, let alone the kind of horrors the internet claims.

Also, most breeds of sheep will literally die if they go too long without being sheared. PETA (and let’s face it, most of this anti-wool stuff can be traced back to deliberate misinformation from PETA) doesn’t care if sheep die, they have openly stated that they would prefer every domestic species that can no longer survive without humans go extinct rather than live in “"slavery.”“

Humans and sheep have lived together for over ten thousand years, they’ve been domesticated longer than dogs! Their lives consist of doing whatever the heck they want (for the most part they only want to walk, eat, sleep, play, and make lambs) while being fed and cared for, for the low price of having their hair cut once a year. Why would anyone boycott this natural, biodegradable fiber humans have been using for so long to the benefit of both species, in favor of plastics that are killing the planet??

eldritchsalad

The ShotBlocker

I’m a trypanophobic, meaning I am afraid of needles. My phobia has caused me to put off or completely avoid injections out of fear. However, recently I found something that helps immensely, the ShotBlocker, by Bionix.

From Bionix’s website,

’Bionix ShotBlocker® is an innovative device that instantly alleviates the pain and anxiety of needle injections. ShotBlocker® works through a novel application of the gate control theory of pain management. It is a plastic, C-shaped device with small bumps on its back. When pressed firmly against the skin at the injection site, ShotBlocker® saturates the sensory nerves and distracts the patient from pain signals caused by the needle poke. The device is both simple and easy to use, bringing comfort to users of all ages.’

The bumps aren’t sharp. Here’s a picture of my hand after I pressed the ShotBlocker to it:

Here’s a picture of the instructions that come with it:

My doctor had no problems administering the shot, and I felt no pain. I don’t mean that as in ‘just a small sting’, I mean that the needle felt just like one of the plastic nubs. Absolutely no pain at all. I was stunned.

Of course, it doesn’t get rid of the anxiety/dizziness/nausea that I get during injections. But with time, I think I’ll be able to train myself out of that.

You can buy them on Bionix’s website for 5.99 USD, I think I got mine from Amazon for a few cents less. They’re reusable and relatively inexpensive. I’d recommend them to anyone.

spoonie-living

Coming out of our pandemic-induced hiatus for half a second because this is quite timely and so dang useful for anyone struggling with balancing a phobia over a desire to get the COVID vaccine ❤️

frocio

i love it when italians argue about italian. like we don’t even know how our language really works we just roll with it

frocio

iphisesque

Italian is 107 different provincial languages stuck together with spit and half a prayer

frogcoded

My bf lives in another region and we are constantly arguing about regional variations of words and we both live in the fucking north of Italy

putaemo-cional

one time i saw a map of italy but instead of cities and roads etc it was just covered w different ways you can say the word vagina. it was covered

frocio

oh I can think of at least seven ways to say the word vagina right off the top of my head rn. I can’t imagine what I could do if I tried harder

criptochecca

Fjgkahfmangksoajufnajejgnanfjakirjvjjs

fishbizkit

this is the Italian Vagina Map, reblog to… I’m not sure actually. Can’t hurt though.

cannot-think-of-a-cute-name

reblog to Italian season your pussy

mikkeneko

character concept: the best trick archer in the world, the trick to which is that he’s actually not an archer at all, he’s a speedster and he can’t aim for shit, every time he takes a shot he actually just grabs the arrow, runs over to what he wants to stick, then runs back before anyone can see him move

mikkeneko

he’s on a team with Heat Vision Man, who actually has no heat vision and is another speedster, he just glares at people then runs over and punches them and is back before they can see him move

mikkeneko

(the entire team is actually just composed of speedsters who all use their speed in different ways, and they all pretend otherwise in front of their teammates)

thatll-do

The only speedster on their team is actually a teleporter

shieldfoss

They all have imposter syndrome because, no matter how fast they speed up, they still can’t see him move. “He’s a real speedster,” they all think. “I’m just a washed up fastguy who needs to pretend I’m a different kind of hero. I’m so scared he’ll tell the others.”

laeffy

Every time I get groceries I’m always appalled at how little you can get for like, $20. I was making banana pudding so I needed vanilla wafers but the brand name nilla wafers cost $4 a box. The minimum wage in my state is $7.25/hr. My friend put it really well when he said “imagine you work for an hour and someone hands you two boxes of nilla wafers and said ‘actually this is a bit more than what I owe you’”

laeffy

How are some of y’all missing the point so bad. “Shop at aldi instead” “make your own food” “don’t buy brand name” “don’t buy unhealthy processed food” It’s not about the box of cookies. This is about how minimum wage pays peanuts and has stagnated for 12 years while the cost of living keeps growing. No one wants your financial advice about how to survive on beans and rice and frozen veggies. The smartest grocery list in the world is not gonna help you budget your way out of poverty. Please get a grip for the love of god

lillyofthewoods

No one should have to worry about the price of food, because everyone should be able to afford food. That’s what this is about. If it’s possible for someone in your society to be unable to afford food, then your society has failed them and you.

normal-horoscopes

Christians keep stealing shit from other esoteric traditions when St Barbara is right there.

normal-horoscopes

Y'all have a PATRON SAINT OF BOMBS AND EXPLOSIONS AND NONE OF Y'ALL EVER MENTION HER

normal-horoscopes

Her symbology is the Chalice and Cannon. Queen.

thelasttime

i’ve been thinking about how it’s so easy to get lost on tumblr with the mindset of like “everyone in the fandom has friends and it’s only me who feels lonely” because you see all these friend groups around you and it feels very isolating sometimes. i want everyone to know that a LOT of people feel this way on tumblr (including me). i have days where i go online and i just feel very lonely like everyone doesn’t want to talk to me and i’m being ignored. basically i’m making this post because i want y'all to know that it’s not just you and i want to give all of you a big big hug

eldritchidiot

the whole squad

kalichnikov

Thanks I hate it: sarcastic disdain, you don't enjoy this at all that's insufferable, I love it: prankster solidarity. A compliment for mischief. You gotta try this dude, it sucks: solidarity through communal self-flagellation It's terrible, watch it immediately: Your classic so-bad-it's-good media

simplyclockwork

@annecumberbatch

Can’t forget, ‘gross, I love it’

rosetta-stoned-bitch

Not to forget the iconic

edible-drywall

How could people forget Data?

mind--master

ask-the-xx-weapon

This was the best scene in the whole series

reikiajakoiranruohoja

Scenes like this are great, because they go into religious horror without making the entire faith evil. Having a demon plainly state that the bishop is an arsehole and deserves hell is always a good plot, especially when the demon IS correct.

seelcudoom

a demon telling you god is not real or god doesent care about humanity is easy to shrug off as demons lieing

but a demon telling you god is real, god is good and god hates your guts quite literally puts the fear of god in you, especially when your about to find out if hes right in about 20 seconds