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@arcanisluna
you can find me over at @bikkidou.
Marie Kondo is full of anecdotes about the weird ass shit that she not only lets people keep but encourages them to elevate in their lives. She says one of her clients ended the process with a bedroom full of vintage pinball machines because what sparks joy in that particular woman was basically sleeping in the middle of an arcade.
Marie Kondo would never make you throw away your weird shit! She wants you to pare down to just your weird shit.
It pisses me off that for YEARS tidying up shows were full of white neurotypicals shaming neurodivergent people for having more than an arbitrary number of possessions and forcing them to go through a traumatic process of throwing away so much of their stuff to fit other people’s standards of “this is how you should live your life” and everyone thought those were fine!
But then in comes this sweet little Japanese lady who says the only rule is how can we make the client’s life happier and less stressful? How can we help them prioritize the things they enjoy being around? Marie Kondo came up with a process that accommodates and respects obsessions and special interests. And people treat her like the devil incarnate.
It’s fucked up.
Okay fun story time:
I’m neurodivergent: ADHD, depression, autism, anxiety. And tidying/cleaning used to send me into panic attacks because the only way I knew how to do it was my mother’s way, which was very neurotypical “if you don’t use it throw it away and if it doesn’t serve an actual “purpose” it’s gone”. This resulted in shit that I loved getting tossed. I would BAWL if I had to tidy up, so my room was just. An unholy mess. Because if it was messy then mom couldn’t find shit to throw it away, and I didn’t have panic attacks over throwing away things I loved.
Fast forward to the birth of my kid. Guilt started to kick my ass, because I’m a bad parent I can’t keep things tidied up. Then, my partner (god I love them so much) told me about Marie Kondo and her method.
Y’all. I cleaned. I CLEANED cleaned. My room became organized for the first time in years because I realized it wasn’t about tossing everything, just the things that weren’t important to me/caused me stress. And that’s still how I clean literal years later.
Does my room still get messy? Yeah, I have fibro and brain fog and pain make it hard to clean. But when I DO clean, it’s much easier, I don’t cry anymore, and I’m surrounded by things that make me happy.
Fuck NT cleaning, Konmari is a life changer, keep what makes you happy and fuck anyone who says otherwise.
She also has organization tips that are basically boiled down to “make everything as easy to access as possible, no stacking things, no tossing things haphazardly into drawers use smaller containers in bigger containers to partition things off (they can be random cardboard packaging etc), you should be able to see everything when you open a drawer or cabinet or what have you, put things where you need them and if that means your shoes are in the kitchen then the shoes belong in the kitchen, if that means granola bars are on the night stand then the granola bars are on the night stand (preferably in their package or in a basket or jar that also sparks joy)”
Coincidentally a lot of these are also tips for people with adhd “everything needs to be visible or it doesn’t exist” (i can relate) and other neurodivergent brains (is that the right way to say it???? Genuinely asking, or is it neurodivergents, or neurodivergent ppl or neurodivergencies?) Her whole method is about respecting and caring for what you own and what makes you happy, reframing your perspective towards things you actually need but stress you out (watch her interview with colbert or minhaj to see what I mean), and most importantly respecting and working with the client by giving them a guide and then gently encouraging them to complete her method with very little interference on her part
-FemaleWarrior
It goes without saying, that waking up in the arms of a stranger, is always going to be an unsettling situation for someone to find themself in, and you yourself were no outlier. The fact that said stranger, also just so happened to be inhuman, only made the whole thing even more nerve wracking.
Whilst it might have been possible to mistake this person as human, from a distance, up this close, there was no denying that they were anything but. From your position in their arms, you could actually feel the unnatural, and almost otherworldly, air, that surrounded them, the power rolling off of their body, almost overwhelming, up so close.
Truthfully, it was only the gentle way they were cradling you, despite their obvious strength, that was keeping you from panicking fully, your sluggish mind seemingly torn between the contradicting feelings of safety, and danger, that were warring within you.
Much to your dismay, you quickly realised that your consciousness was fading, just as swiftly, and abruptly, as it had returned, your head lolling weakly against the strangers shoulder, as your brief flare of strength, petered out. The look of genuine concern in their intense gaze, was the last thing you saw, as you once again succumbed to the darkness that was calling you, leaving you completely at their mercy.
Hopefully, when you awoke, you would be able to ask your strange protector, what it was that had originally led you into their tender grasp in the first place.
….Though something told you, you weren’t going to enjoy their answer.
this is the funniest tweet i’ve seen in months bye
these are all the geek equivalents of Lovecraft’s Cat’s Name
his cats name couldn’t be that bad!!!! it’s a cat, what’s the worst name?
i am wrong, what the fuck
Me every time this post comes back
Callout post just for me on this beautiful monday morning
Hot take: people who argue that saying “mood,” “same,” “F,” “oh worm?” etc. add nothing to a conversation don’t realize that they function the same way as aizuchi, i.e. signalling that you’re still paying attention to what the speaker is saying, which is harder to do when you can’t see the other person. In this essay, I will
No go on, I’m listening
Hell, they don’t, I will. In this essay I will discuss how the textual and meme-based forms of aizuchi are not only a sign of our changing methods of communication with the advent of technology, but a particular advantage to those who have problems deriving shades of meaning from vocal tone or facial expression, and arguments made against textual and meme-based forms of aizuchi are speaking from a platform of ableism.
Technology has made a lot of changes in the way we communicate. When it’s face-to-face, we can get away with nods, that little ‘yeah, good point’ purse of the lips, raised eyebrows, that face-scrunch that just says ‘doubt’ … facial expressions, in short; really complex ones, often with an aural component. We read more from those than we realise, but at their base level, they show that we’re not only hearing the noises and nodding in the right places, but listening.
Enter the telephone. Suddenly a speaker can’t see where their conversational companion’s eyes are pointing, what they’re doing with their hands, what their posture’s like, or even if there’s someone on the other end of this bit of plastic they’re talking into. I imagine that aural aizuchi became common to the point of being considered a conversational necessity with the telephone, because when telecommunications technology was in its infancy, back in the days of party lines, it was shaky and unreliable (think Comcast) and there was every chance that your call could be disconnected without realising it. So interjecting with aural cues helped when it came to building trust in the communications medium that was the telephone.
When the internet turned up, it took away even the aural component, and the problem that arose with the telephone repeated itself on a grander scale. Not only could someone not necessarily be sure that someone was paying attention (yes, they might be online, but are they looking at the chat box or did they alt-tab out?), but any exchange was stripped of emotional content. The conversational cue words used to denote attention being paid can come across as sarcastic, dismissive or overly abrupt when stripped down to words on a screen, without the nuance lent to it by vocal tone and facial expression.
The solution? Create a whole new dialect, combining pictures and text to capitalise on a shared cultural foundation. If you’ve ever seen the ST:TNG episode “Darmok”, it’s a bit like that. There are a lot of different cultural cue points (thus “There’s a horse loose in a hospital!” instead of “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra”), and we abbreviate a lot, but in principle, it’s the same. We communicate in metaphor, allowing our shared cultural background carry the emotional nuance that’s lacking in text alone.
What seldom gets brought up is how this has helped those who have issues parsing facial expressions. For some people, parsing all but the most basic facial expressions is a hit-and-miss exercise requiring a lot of work, and vocal tone hits them the same way. When we started communicating online in what I can only call a memetic dialect, we started conveying concrete, text-proven emotional context in our conversations. This must have been a relief for anyone who has difficulties reading facial expressions and vocal tones, since people can lie about what’s going on behind their face but an established cultural foundation at least pins down what their conversational partner or partners meant to convey. Also consider: when this memetic dialect came into use in face-to-face conversation, it gave a solid emotional context to certain words that can be referenced outside of the forum-and-text-chat medium. In short - words and phrases mean things and, once that meaning has been established, it carries over into whatever mode of conversation is in use.
The fact that we as a culture created a memetic dialect to effectively communicate emotional context via a medium entirely stripped of the standard emotional cues is incredible, and I honestly believe that anyone who takes issue with “same” or “mood” used in text conversation (or even verbally, since the thing about memetic anything is that it spreads; that’s the point of a meme) should probably be obliged to analyse their own speech for useless words. At least that might help make the point that everyone uses filler words or aizuchi, but modern forms of it actually make sense not only in terms of adapting to suit a medium, but also adapting to be equitable to those who may have issues with emotional context in other sources.
i love your comment, i really do.. but memetic dialect.
For more information, look up “backchannel” or “phatic expressions.”
I love this and highly recommend Because Internet: Understanding the New Rules of Language, by Gretchen McCulloch, who specializes in internet linguistics.
you know what i don’t see enough in books and media in general?
stuttering.
and no, i don’t mean the n-nervous b-b-b-blushing st-stuttering, i mean actual, clinical stuttering. stuttering that doesn’t just appear when you’re doing a presentation or talking to someone you like. stuttering that shows up in everyday conversation.
i’ve had a stutter for as long as i can remember, and even though it’s something that seems so minuscule, it really isn’t. i got bullied because of it. bullied. can you imagine that? people still make fun of me for it to this day, and i think that it was a factor in my severe social anxiety and stage fright. seriously, it’s hard.
so i want to see a story that includes a character who stutters, even a minor one. it might get a little annoying, but it doesn’t even have to be that big! just the occasional slip-up, a nervous tic. it would make a lot of people feel better.
and if their character arcs surround their stutter? even better! it shows that we can learn to overcome our stutter, and that we shouldn’t let it hinder us from doing the things we want.
TL;DR, stuttering and similar verbal and physical tics are severely underrepresented in media.
(if anyone has any questions about stuttering at all, please don’t hesitate to ask! i would love to talk about it!)
hey hey hey! i’m really glad you thought of including a character that would stutter! if you want some advice, here it is:
i can usually feel a stutter coming on, if that makes sense. when that happens, i pause before trying again. you could try that?
i also stutter more when i talk quickly. if i pronounce my words and speak slower, it happens less
stutter isn’t really like, “i-i w-went t-to sc-school to-today.” being honest, that would get annoying really fast. it’s more like “i went… i went to school t-today.”
you don’t have to include it in every sentence or thing they say, of course. i rarely choke on single words
one annoying thing is when people try to correct me. i know you’re trying to be nice but i know how to read, for God’s sake. one time my teacher tried to correct me on the word “water.” water! can you believe?
it also happens more frequently when i’m saying something i haven’t memorized, like if i’m reading out loud!
anyway, hope this helped a little! if there are anymore questions don’t hesitate to pm me or pop into my ask box!
This is such wonderful advice! I have a mild stutter myself, and a major side character appears in the second book of my wip with one just like it. Even though I have personal experience, though, it’s always lovely to get more to use as reference, so thank you!
Though my experience is likely very different, especially because I find I’m often able to hide or lessen the impact of my stutter, here’s some other things I find:
My stutter usually comes with the same pauses as @tenacious-scripturient, often because I forget the word I want to say next, or I know I will have trouble saying it.
However, when I’m speaking fast (as I do a lot, that’s just me), I tend to repeat the word (or the phrase) before the “stutter word” several times until I can think of a way of saying or getting around the “stutter word”. E.g. “That’s not what I–that’s not what I, what I, what I said.”
In casual situations with close friends, I’ll often focus less on controlling my stutter, so you’ll get a lot more of the above, and even sometimes the classic r-r-repeated start sounds.
Do I stutter more when I’m nervous/flustered/embarrassed? Yes, maybe. But I’m also aware of that, so I slow down my speech to get more pauses than more obvious stuttering.
Adding on to what OP said, when it comes to reading things aloud in school, I tend to skip ahead to the passage I know I’m going to have to read to read over it in my mind several times beforehand, practicing how to say the individual parts.
A disclaimer, though! There are many different types of stutters that are caused by different things! I know some types have more of the classic repeated start sounds, but in personal experience, I’ve found my own sort of stutter to be much more common!
Anyways, thank you for bringing this up, Phahbiyah! It would be so marvelous to see more verbal/physical tics in media, and particularly in a good lighting! (Rather than being made fun of for comedy purposes. There’s nothing wrong with Porky Pig, but it gets tiring after a while of only seeing that kind of depiction. -u-)
I hope my comments could also be of help~
This kind of advice is great for writing realistic dialogue! I always suggest listening very closely to how many different kinds of people speak. For stuttering and other forms of realistic dialogue, consider these:
“I… I don’t think so.”
“Hey, uh, are you coming?”
“W-what? No, I-I don’t.”
I mean– I mean, I guess so.“
“You don’t… you really don’t think that…?”
“S-she doesn’t… I don’t think… She kept saying that…”
“Please, I don’t wanna I don’t wanna I don’t wanna…”
“Yeah, I uh… I-I totally saw that.”
Stutters and stumbling over words can absolutely be portrayed with t-t-the r-repeated sounds, but use it sparingly! Otherwise it sounds staged. Use it where it sounds natural. For the most part, I am very fond of filler words (ah, uh, hmm, er, um), dashes (I mean– I…), repeated words and phrases (you don’t, you really don’t), ellipses (I… I don’t), and a lack of punctuation (don’t wanna don’t wanna don’t wanna) and slang to give the impression of speaking very quickly. I find this last tip most helpful in writing characters with anxiety or other panic disorders, or just those that are nervous about a topic.
When it doubt, say your dialogue out loud and test out how natural it feels. Play around with different things, see what’s right for you and your characters!
There’s this comedian who got a stutter when he was hit with a baseball. I watch his videos and he is truly amazing. He is a person you can go look at to see how a stutter sounds. His name is Drew Lynch.
wow. this blew up overnight, and i’m so thankful everyone was so supportive of it :) all this advice is just amazing!
and as @metaphors-and-melodrama said, it’s also great for writing natural dialogue! ellipses and repeating words don’t just appear in stuttering, they also appear in everyday speech.
again, if anyone has any questions, don’t hesitate to comment on this post, pop into my ask box, or pm me!
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gonna post a controversial take alright are y’all ready??
…
actually typing out emoticons like XD and :D and :V never should have gone out of fashion and you can pry them out of my cold dead hands okay I know emojis are fun but THEY DON’T CAPTURE THE EMOTION IN THE SAME WAY
so like
…yeah that was basically it, thanks for reading
also websites that automatically replace your typed out <3 and :D with emojis upon sending them are a Danger To Everything That’s Good In The World
bring back nose smilies :-)
There is no emoji that captures what I mean by :P (I do NOT mean “hur hur goofy-ass face!”) and the one for :^/ is not great. And lest we forget, 🤷🏻♀️ is absolutely inadequate compared to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Faces no emoji has ever managed to capture, imo:
:P
^_^
:3
^u^
:/
O.o
0.0
>:/
<(^u^)>
I am too old to stop using XD
i have never yet found an emoji that fully captures the shifty energy of:
>_>
<_<
Oh man, I’ve missed O.o
Especially alternating to really capture how boggled you are.
O.o
o.O
O.o
Whatever the name of this team is, I am on it
sir
sir, you do not belong there
he has a permit, leave him alone
he does, in fact, not have a permit to be in the cat food pantry. i know this bc i issue those permits, and i have issued no such permit to this particular gentleman. if he might be so called.
i promise you he filed the paperwork with my office and he is just waiting for it in the mail
how did you get authority to give my cats cat crime permits?
This woman assured me I am authorized:
my friend, this is a very common scam. this woman is well known to authorities for cat crimes, especially fraud.
that's what I thought ma'am but her lawyer assured me she was legitimate:
so trustworthy in appearance, and yet so duplicitous! you are the victim of a worldclass bamboozle! please, consult your insurance policy. you should have some financial coverage, but i am afraid your reputation may never recover.
what reputation
fair enough. as you were.
Sometimes I say self loathing things to my therapist and he looks at me dead in the eyes before saying “You fucking moron.” and tbh same
Me: I think I don’t exist.
Therapist: Listen, you do exist, and if you didn’t, someone would have to create you because the world would be a much sadder place.
Me: Jerome, how dare you saying something so sweet when I’m dissociating.
Me: Honestly, (thing that is totally fucked up for any ‘sane’ person) is normal, right?
Therapist: No.
Me: Wow.
Therapist: You’re just a fucked up bitch.
Me: I do agree with the fucked up bitch part.
Therapist: That’s a start!
Me: I guess he’s still my friend?
Therapist: Considering what you told me and how much you wanna beat him to death, he’s not. You pretty much hate him despite knowing him for years.
Me:
Me: Why did I need to come here to realize that.
Therapist: Because that’s my job to help you to understand some stuff. Also because you’re way too kind and you would let someone punch you in the guts and still consider them as your friend while they stab you.
Me: I don’t need that kind of call out, Jerome.
Me: Hey, I brought you coffee. And croissants too, but I ate them. *puts Starbucks coffee in front of him*
Therapist: Oh that’s nice!!... Oh my name is on it!!
Me: Yeah!!
Therapist: It’s wholesome but... *very confused and silently*... How do I drink it?
Me, not being able to come to my appointment and having to call him: I’m sorry, it’s all my fault, I’m so so so sorr-
Therapist: I dare you to say sorry one more time. I dare you.
Therapist: Hey I wanna show you this super funny image I found the other day.
Me: What-
Therapist: *turns his screen and show me THIS*
Me:
Me: Jerome.
Therapist: You went to the gaypride?
Me: Yeah, I went.
Therapist: Was it something you enjoyed?
Me: Mh. Yeah. Sorta.
Therapist: Did you see some bears?
Me:
Me: Jerome wh-
Therapist: That’s the only term I know outside of the LGTB one, I wanted to use it.
Therapist: Are you sure you’re not becoming roommate with (name) because of pity? Kinda sacrificing yourself?
Me: No, I want it!!
Therapist: Finally, you’re not forcing yourself for the others! And you’re doing something you want! I’m proud of you!
Me: You’re more of a dad than my own father.
Therapist: That’s not very hard.
Me: I always wondered, are you queer?
Therapist: I am not.
Me: Ooh.
Therapist: Or am I?
Me: Ooh!
As an update, Jerome gave my appointment to someone’s else today so we were both in the waiting room, confused and he walked in, patted my head and said sorry but honestly it was hilarious.
The secretary came to tell me that Jerome actually forgot to write me down on the appointment list.
This is a 100% normal situation with Jerome as my Therapist.
As an addition, more than half of my friends want Jerome to adopt me and refer to him as “Therapist dad”.
He’s aware of it and think it’s hilarious.
Me, after complaining for the 25 times about my birth father: Idk if you noticed, but I’m full of anger against him.
Therapist: Oh, really, I never noticed. You know, you should turn that anger into indifference. It would help you.
Me: Unholy gods, I wish it was me.
Therapist: You know, people will still love you even if you don’t offer them things all the time. You don’t have to do that.
Me: What??
Therapist: Why don’t you send a mail to your psychiatrist when you have a bad mood swing?
Me: Like what? ‘Hey Joël wassup, I’ve been very suicidal lately last night I wanted to die. Hope you have rad vacations and the weed is good save some good kush for me, kissy kissy.’ ?
Therapist: Exactly.
Me: You’re as bad as me with human interactions Jerome, y’know.
Me, heavily dissociating: I don’t exist-
Therapist: Can I touch you to prove you that you do?
Me: Dinner first.
Therapist:
Therapist: Damien, you moron.
Therapist: You need vacations.
Me: I’m broke.
Therapist: Oh yeah.
Therapist: You still need vacations tho.
Me: Jerome, I am still broke.
Me, by text: Hey, you just walk by me!
Therapist, by text: Oh sorry. I didn’t see you.
Therapist, by text: Wait. Were you at the tattoo shop?
Me, by text, totally at the tattoo shop: You have no proof.
For a bit of context here: Around two months ago I went to a friend’s who happened the live on the same street as Jerome, which I didn’t know. He was really surprised to see me and came to check on me, asking me why I was here with a bit of concern on his voice. And this take place earlier this month:
Therapist: So your friend lives in the same street than I?
Me: Yes. Town’s short I guess.
Therapist: Were you really going to your friend...?
Me: Yes?? Why else would I be here?
Therapist: A lot of drug deals happen in this street and I see often teenagers and young adults coming and buy stuffs. I was a bit worried for you.
Me, at 2pm: I’m sorry I’m going to be late!
Therapist: Your appointment was this morning at 11:30am, Damien.
Me:
Me: What.
Jerome is still not aware of his fame and idk how to announce him.
Therapist; What’s up with you and wanting domestic rats.
Me: I’m gonna get a rat and call him Jerome just to piss you off.
Therapist:
Therapist: How dare you.
Therapist: Weed doesn’t do much on me and I must admit I’m kinda disappointed.
Me:
Therapist: Do you smoke?
Me: Jerome.
On hard days I wonder how Jerome is doing
He’s doing fine, last time he shown me his fav pic of a red panda which is this one
I FOUND IT I FOUND IT I FUCKING FOUND IT AAAAAAAH YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY THIS MADE ME FEEL
It’s really amazing how happy people get when they find this post omg
Always reblog Jerome.
Is he now aware of his fame?
After months, he is, and he just told me “Haha, this is funny. I’m happy it’s helping people!”
I think he doesn’t realize that he’s known *worldwide*
World Heritage Post
JOEY 🌎
original thread by @pukicho and several other users
I always love seeing this comic because it interprets Tumblr as a gigantic theater ruled by absolute chaos where sometimes somebody just stands up on their chair and shouts and we all pay attention
this post is from THIS YEAR
had to fact check and holy shit 2020 really has been 3 years long.
Happy one year anniversary little thread
Happy 3rd anniversary to the original reblog chain (which hails from 2018) featured in the comic
it fucken WIMDY
ever since i first saw this post, “it fucken WIMDY” is easily one of the top ten most commonly used phrases in my household.
My job is done.
they know their priorities
Me, an artist:
Me, a writer:
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Updated prices and made it look as best as I could. If you have any inquiries, please contact me on @ofauris, as I’m easier to reach there.