Goddammit, thank you for that Page post. I've read discussions about it on tumblr, ovarit and even saidit, and EVERYWHERE the so called feminists were shitting on her for... Being short ig?? Having a big forehead?? And like you said calling her a "teenage boy". This honestly made me feel so disgusted, especially since I'm also short (taller than Page tho) and gnc.I guess this whole thing proves how actually difficult it is to unlearn the misogyny we grow up with :(
Anon was referring to this post. And these kind of reactions are draining. They just make me so, so tired. I mean, a lesbian, one in the public eye, who has spoken before about how she’s been abused and harassed, who has spoken about the shame and self-hatred she’s had to face for being a lesbian, who’s always seemed uncomfortable in “feminine” clothing, and decides to wear the clothes she’s comfortable in and cut her hair in a manner that appeals to her — and let’s be honest, none of the women criticising her when the Time article came out were commenting on lesbophobia or how Page’s decision impacts public perception of lesbians and sex stereotypes; all that mattered was her appearance — and every woman with spare time and zero empathy just decide to insult her style choices. Talk about community, talk about sisterhood. I guess I’m a “ugly teenage boy” too if they pass me in the street and women’s liberation is freedom to dunk on lesbians.
It’s misogyny, plain and simple. A woman has different political beliefs, and instead of criticising those beliefs, that woman is reduced to her appearance and her experiences lose all credibility, she is discounted, because she doesn’t have the right appearance. She’s an “ugly teenage boy”, she’s a “hag”, she’s “unhygienic”, she’s “old”, no man is ever going to want her, she’s gonna end up alone. The same old trope, rehashed, and always directed at women. But yes, I guess the women trashing Page’s choice of plain tees, jeans, sneakers and short hair can call themselves “feminists” because they do know how to spot a woman (read here: the appropriate target for a reduction to appearances only). Given that climate, it’s no wonder Page turned to the gender nonsense to get a break. At least no one there is giving her shit for just wanting to exist*.
Moreover, I thought one of the point of feminism was that no woman owes you beauty? That no woman owes you a performance to have her opinions considered, or to be extended, you know, basic respect? But I kept seeing women acting as if another woman had to fit their own standard of appearance to be afforded that basic respect. And it’s really funny (and by that I mean terribly sad) how feminists normally agree that make-up, high heels, flimsy and short impractical clothing are part of the tools men use to oppress us daily, but as soon as a woman rejects them she’s dog-piled? Way to encourage the behaviour you want to see in the world.
It’s also lesbophobia unleashed. There’s never this level of vitriol to criticise heterosexually-partnered women in the public eye who perform extreme femininity, even if their behaviour is way more negative for all the women and girls who come across media where they appear. It’s always directed at lesbians who refuse to conform, who refuse to perform femininity, who choose to exist in their natural state. These women don’t seem to be bothered by who will be hit in the cross-fire. They forget that what Page was wearing in these pictures is the kind of clothes any woman might wear to be comfortable. They forget that there are plenty of lesbians out there who feel at home in that kind of clothes and who wear them daily. They forget that the very women they’re always asking solidarity from are also a direct target of this rabid appearance insulting.
I don’t think it proves how difficult it is to unlearn the misogyny we grow up with; I think it highlights how many women don’t care about unlearning that misogyny. They aren’t even trying. There is no remorse, as highlighted by this anon I got, who should have been able to get it. It looks like for many women, at least in the “Western world”, feminism is just a space to vent about how mean men are, before going right back to the status quo. There’s no want for change, no real will for action. And lesbians keep getting called would-be-men, like the old homophobia. The world is still the same.
*Again, I don’t caution her choice, hating your body and the misogyny/lesbophobia you face is never going to be solved by pretending you can identify out of oppression, but that’s not really the subject here. The subject is criticising women for their physical appearance and for choosing practical clothing (which is misogyny).
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