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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
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DEAR READER
Today's Document
taylor price
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Peter Solarz

Kaledo Art
Sweet Seals For You, Always
sheepfilms
RMH
dirt enthusiast

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@artemisvictor
that post about ‘the patti lupone you know is already dead and gone’ sends me every fucking time. i love that stupid post. it’s so fucking funny.
this is peak humour kadjfk;lasjflka;sjfl
CALIFORNIA 2019
character in a fight scene: *restrains their opponent by pinning them against the wall by their wrists*
me:
character in a fight scene: *pins their opponent down by straddling their waist and holding their wrists to the floor*
me:
character in a fight scene: *lifting their disarmed opponent’s chin slightly with the business end of their weapon*
me:
character in fight scene: *pins down the opponent and leans in close to whisper in their ear*
me:
character in fight scene: *restrains the opponent by twisting their arm/s behind their back and pinning them to the wall chest first with their own chest pressing against the opponents back*
me:
Character: *distracts their otherwise equally good/better opponent by flirting*
Me:
Character in fighting scene: *restrains opponents arms in a lock hold with their own, entangling their arms together forcing their bodies to be pressed together and faces in close proximity*
character in fight scene: *holds opponent by the collar, lifts them and brings them close to their face*
me:
Every time this crosses my dash it gets better.
Transformers books are wild
if my ex boyfriend forced himself into my memories to erase some bullshit he did so his current boytoy wouldn’t find out about it, thus leaving my mind completely vulnerable to manipulation by outside parties, and then didn’t even tell me about it before he took off on a frat ship i simply wouldn’t still have feelings for him.
rip to prowl but i’m different
The fact that humans can be killed through physical means is so ridiculous to me
Like this sounds wild but like. hear me out. a person is such a ridiculously infinitely complicated web of thoughts and feelings and beliefs and such an unbelievably huge amount of knowledge and the idea that you can destroy that by holding a pillow over someone's face for three minutes is absolutely surreal. The idea that you can remove knowledge and emotion and memory from the world with a physical object is literally unbelievable. people are literally infinitely huge and complex and the fact that you can kill the person by killing the body is wild. I'm sure this is incoherent but I hope you get it
It's like. Imagine you threw a fist-sized rock at the empire state building and the entire thing and everything inside it collapsed into dust. That's what the existence of human death feels like
Put the blunt down
NO drugs here legend just a healthy amount of existential despair. I’m a clean livin teen
questionable decisions.png
i had three fic ideas. wrote one. i still have three fic ideas. this is not how math is supposed to work.
can this post please back up it’s too close to home
I had five ideas, I wrote two, now I have seven
Listen. They’re called “plot bunnies” for a reason, and it’s not just because they hop around all over your brain demanding attention.
🎶99 fanfic ideas on my blog
99 fanfic ideas~
Take one down, pass it around
137 fanfic ideas on my blog🎶
this post walked into my house and kicked in my ribs
My brain: IDEAS!
Me: okay, I’ll write it out in a fic. When I’m finished with it, I’ll move onto the next one.
My brain: No finish, only ideas.
quarantine rave
why is every one of these video THAT song?
because the caramelldansen is s uch a fucking banger and i lose 5 years of my lifespan whenever someone doesn’t recognize it
u can buy knock off demonia platforms on iheartraves.com . just so everyone knows. youre welcome goths
i was wrong theyre not even knock offs theyre just $40 cheaper. im p sure theyre like $200 on dollskill so keep your wits about you girls
PANDEMICA
I made a quiz, its 36 questions, and y’all, I play-tested this, I got feedback, I hyper-analyzed, its good. I wasn’t like, I was gonna just let hogwarts houses die but apparently y’all be like,,, not knowing what a slytherin or hufflepuff is no shade and if all these quizzes are gonna ask you this question anyways: this is it. Idiot tested. Idiot approved
take it here! or copy paste if you need to https://uquiz.com/oz0xOu
I thought this was going to be another funney haha wizard quiz from those books you grew up reading but it reached into my torso and ripped out my spine
Helicoprion: What if, like, teeth,
Mesosaurus: Yeah?
Helicoprion: but WHEEL
Mesosaurus: No don’t -
Helicoprion:
(Image by ДиБгд)
Drepanosaurus: What if, like, tail,
Rutiodon: Yeah?
Drepanosaurus: But CLAW
Rutiodon: How would you -
Drepanosaurus:
(by @drawingwithdinosaurs)
Igunaodon: What if, like, thumb,
Hypselospinus: Yeah?
Igunaodon: But like spike
Hypselospinus: But why would you ne-
Igunaodon:
Stegosaurus: What if, like, tail
Camptosaurus: Yeah?
Stegosaurus: But SHARP
Camptosaurus: But what would y-
Stegosaurus:
Pelagornis: what if, like, beak
Paramobula: I’m listening
Pelagornis: but TEETH
Paramobula: what possible reason would you have t-
Pelagornis:
(Image by Peter Trusler)
Cotylorhynchus: What if, like, head
Moschops: Okay?
Cotylorhynchus: But SMALL
Moschops: What? No, why the he-
Cotylorhynchus:
Erythrosuchus: Okay but what if, head
Cotylorhynchus: I’m listening…
Erythrosuchus: But HUGE
Cotylorhynchus: What no pump the breaks there why-
Erythrosuchus:
Sharovipteryx: Okay, but what if like, wings
Kyrgyzsaurus: Okay?
Sharovipteryx: on my BACK LEGS
Kyrgyzsaurus: Wait hold on now, why would you put them-
Sharovpiteryx:
Deinocheirus: Okay, but what if…
Barsboldia: What if what?
Deinocheirus: : )
Barsboldia: What are you doing, what is this, wh-
Deinocheirus:
Therizinosaurus: Ok what if claw…
Deinocheirus: Alright go on….
Therizinosaurus: But l o n g
Deinocheirus: You eat planet for heavens sake why in the world would yo—
Therizinosaurus: SUCK IT IM WOLVERINE
Azhdarchidae: What if, like, fly?
Pterosauria: Okay… what about it?
Azhdarchidae: But HE A D
Pterosauria: What does that even-
Azhdarchidae:
Thylacoleonidae: ok, what if vegetarian teeth Diprotodontia: sure Thylacoleonidae: but for MEATING
Diprodontia: how are you even going to do this
Thylacoleonidae: you are like baby, watch THIS -
Brachytracholepan: What if neck
Tehuelchesaurus: yep thats basically our identity
Brachytrachelopan: but chonk
Tehuelchesaurus: WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK
Brachytrachelopan: Chungus time
Ichthyovenator: What if, like, sail
Spinosaurus: Yes?
Ichthyovenator: but HOLE
Spinosaurus: Why would you-
Ichthyovenator:
Parasaurolophus: What if, you know, crest
Gryposaurus: Cool, go on
Parasaurolophus: but more
Gryposaurus: …okay?
Parasaurolophus: and trumpet
Gryposaurus: For wha-
Parasaurolophus: BIIIIIIIIIIGGGG HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNK
Yi Qi: What if, um, Wing
Anchiornis: Yes, yes go on,
Yi Qi: but, more skin
Anchiornis: But we are all doing this feth…….
Yi Qi: FLAP FLAP
Eoabelisaurus: What if, like, hand.
Asfaltovenator: Yeah?
Eoabelisaurus: But like, nub?
Asfaltovenator: But wouldn’t that–
90 MILLION YEARS OF EVOLUTION LATER
“…damnit!”
Kaprosuchus: Okay so.. teeth, yeah?
Crocodyliformes: Mmhmm?
Kaprosuchus: But they’re tusks
Crocodyliformes: Oh God..
Kaprosuchus: And I’m twenty feet long
Crocodyliformes: Don’t do it..
Kaprosuchus: And upright.
Crocodyliformes: Please sto-
Kaprosuchus:
Stethacanthus: okay, what if fin…
Cretoxyrhina: Yeah, what about it?
Stethacanthus: But anvil
Cretoxyrhina: What
Stethacanthus: with teeth
Cretoxyrhina: Nonononodon’t-
Stethacanthus: and teeth on forehead
Cretoxyrhina: STOP
Stethacanthus:
Opabinia: Hey, so–
Anomalocaris: oh God what now??
Opabinia: what if… Eye
Anomalocaris: no, stop
Opabinia: but FIVE
Anomalocaris: I SAID STOP
Opabinia: NOSE CLAW
Anomalocaris: YOU WHA–
Opabinia:
Tully Monster: greetings~
Every living creature, like, ever: Oh Jesus Christ what do you want
Tully Monster: :)
Every living creature ever: what
Tully Monster: :)))
Every living creature ever: I’m literally begging you to stop
Tully Monster: :)))))))))))))
Nyctosaurus: What if, like, head…
Pteranodon: Yeah?
Nyctosaurus: But FORK
Pteranodon: Nyctosaurus you are trying my patience…
(art by Julio Lacerda)
me about to do some dumb shit in front of my friends
Construction crew commuting to work
#it’s like a clown car but#with more Slav
It’s Slav TARDIS
The most Slavic thing ever
what the fuck. what the fuck.
I lost it at 11
17? 17 people and a guitar??
#AND an accordion
How
stack the slavs