Miriam

demigod ☀️ shadowhunter ➰ witch 💛🖤 history science student 📜 bookworm 📚 swiftie 🎶 & queer 🏳️‍🌈

[awritingblueberry]

My projects:

Shadowhunters:

Kit's Diary

His Dark Materials

Hogwarts AU (German Translation)

Swiftie Stuff:

Song Ratings

Showgirl Cardigan

Crocheting the Speak Now Cardigan ...

[awritingblueberry]

What theological belief would Will and Lyra have?

In The Amber Spyglass they "kill" a being that is implied to be God (or rather a being claiming to be God). Therefore, if they don't doubt their own experiences, they now either know that "God" existed and is now dead or they realised that this being wasn't the actual God. So I'm wondering what their theological belief after that experience would be, especially if they think this being told them the truth about being God.

Probably not agnostic (aka the belief that the existance or non existance of God cannot be proven), considering they killed him and therefore have prove of his existance, unless of course they realised he's not the real God.

In this case, they could perhaps be atheistic, but one being posing as God also doesn't prove his nonexistance. So perhaps not.

Or, if they believe they actually killed God, so that God once existed and is now dead, that wouldn't really be theism either, right? So what would that be called?

Or did they actually never realise this being was (claiming to be) God and therefore only think they killed a random angel? In this case they would probably just believe in whatever they believed in before or have their opinion shaped by other experiences independent from this scene.

(By the way, I read the books only in German and it was a while ago, so perhaps it is explained differently or more understandable in other languages and I just misunderstood the scene. Also obviously, most pre-teens don't question the existance of God, I mean later in life, when they are old enough to actually think about this critically.)

[awritingblueberry]

Hello fellow readers,

it's just me shamelessly advertising my own fanfic again.

It's a Lyra & Will reunion taking place in the Harry Potter world with a bit of plot (more than originally planned, but I heard, we like plot over here).

If you want to give it a read, here's the link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/72424396/chapters/188589096

And if you're reading it already, thank you so much! :-)

[awritingblueberry]

His Dark Materials Hogwarts AU

Bur Man Laimi - A Chant for Happiness

A His Dark Materials Hogwarts AU with a little bit more magic.

The Triwizard Tournament is coming to Scotland again and the wizarding students of Hogwarts, Beauxbatons and Durmstrang are buzzing with excitement over the chance to participate in the renowned contest between the three schools. While Gryffindor student Mark Ransom seeks to prove that his friend Will is, in fact, the main character, a young girl who suddenly appeared in the French school without a daemon is willing to try everything to find her family again. And a certain Russian girl, whose name is definitely Tatiana and NOT Lyra, finally has a chance at facing her past and returning into the arms of her long lost lover. But the defeated dark forces are not amused about their lost power and still lurk in the shadows, always ready to make a great comeback.

Title from the song “Bur Man Laimi” by the Latvian group Tautumeitas.

Updating information: I'll hopefully post one chapter every month and since I'm almost done with my first draft (unless it becomes way longer than I anticipated), rest assured that I am going to finish this work.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

And for the German readers, here's also the German translation:

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[awritingblueberry]

Cardigan Appreciation Post

I may or may not have fallen into the capitalistic trap of being a swiftie and bought myself a cardigan. (I did want one for a long time though! This wasn't an impulse purchase.)

Anyways, it arrived yesterday (because we have a public holiday in Germany on October 3rd) and it's sooo pretty!!!

Also it is quite warm and not as scratchy as I feared. Just the arms are a bit short. Which is my fault though because I bought it a size too small (for reference: I'm 1,72 m tall and bought XS/S).

And look how well it fits to my shoes! How did I happen to buy such showgirly shoes before the album was even announced?

It's way more sparkly in real life by the way. These photos are not doing it justice!

More like this:

And I also happened to have bought a opalite bracelet on the Christmas Market last year. What a funny coincidence!

And since those aren't already enough coincidences, my Dad gifted me a new bottle because my old one broke. And guess which colour it has? The same turquoise-green as the CD cover!

I'm starting to think this album might be my lucky one...

But one important question to all the swiftie who already own a cardigan: The label says that you can't wash it in the washing machine. Did any of you try it anyway? And did it survive that?

[awritingblueberry]

Speak Now

(Taylor’s Version)

release: 25 October 2010

rerecording release: 7 July 2023

genre: country pop, pop rock, power pop

Taylor wrote all songs by herself

Ratings from September 22, 2025

1. Mine ☆☆☆☆.5

I love how similar it is to 'Fearless'. Also goes onto my Sunshine Playlist!

2. Sparks Fly ☆☆☆☆

I fear this whole album I'll just go "I love this!" and give every song 4-5 stars. But what can I say? I love this!

3. Back To December ☆☆☆☆

And I'm already starting to repeat myself: I love this, too! And look at that: Taylor doesn't only bad talk her exes, she can also apologise!

4. Speak Now ☆☆☆

I don't quite like this one as much as the other songs. But I do like the storytelling and the bridge.

5. Dear John ☆☆☆☆.5

Love the emotion and devastation. And the bridge, especially the second half.

6. Mean ☆☆☆

Great song for everyone who was bullied! It's not quite the same level of songwriting as the other songs, but I love the pure pettiness in the lyrics.

7. The Story of Us ☆☆☆.5

I like the rock elements.

8. Never Grow Up ☆☆☆.5

Taylor, stop making me cry.

9. Enchanted ☆☆☆☆.5

I'm literally enchanted by this song.

10. Better Than Revenge ☆☆☆☆

I love the pettiness, the lyrics and the rock elements. And I actually really like the lyric change from the original.

11. Innocent ☆☆☆☆.5

Imagine bullying a young new singer in front of a global audience and getting this as an answer... Also I really love the lyrics.

12. Haunted ☆☆☆☆☆

This is my favourite Taylor Swift song. I love the rock, the lyrics, the violin. Just everything!

(Edit from after listening to TTPD: Haunted is no longer my favourite, but very very close.)

13. Last Kiss ☆☆☆☆.5

The devastation! Not quite as sad as some TTPD songs, but really damn close. I AM NOT CRYING! (lies...)

14. Long Live ☆☆☆☆

I love the lyrics and the catchiness. Totally singing along every time. I read something said it might be about her fans. That's so cute!

15. Ours ☆☆.5

This has a really important message, but knowing who this is probably about, it's giving manipulation ...

16. Superman ☆☆☆

Super catchy and adorable.

From The Vault:

17. Electric Touch (ft. Fall Out Boy) ☆☆☆☆

In 2022 I saw Taylor’s and FOB's performance together and thought that they should make a collab. And they did!!! I really love this! But something is missing...

18. When Emma Falls In Love ☆☆☆☆.5

I really love this song, especially the lyrics. Also, I can't be the only one thinking of Emma Carstairs (Shadowhunters) here, right? It fits so well!

19. I Can See You ☆☆☆

Well... I can see how this was left in the vault. Someone (Taylor’s mom) surely vetoed. But I also can't find a song from the original album that I would exchange with this one. Apart of 'Ours' maybe. But expecting every vault song to better than the original songs is unreasonable anyway. There is a reason they didn't make it in there in the first place.

20. Castles Crumbling (ft. Hayley Williams) ☆☆☆☆.5

Now leaving this in the vault was a crime! I love this collab, too. And the lyrics. And the whole song.

21. Foolish One ☆☆☆.5

I love the lyrics and the catchiness. It kind of feels like a faerie scolding you for trusting them.

22. Timeless ☆☆☆☆

I love the lyrics! And it almost made me cry (I'm dehydrating over here). But can we stop romanticising Romeo and Juliet (and Shakespeare tragedies in general)? This is really not the couple you should look up to!

my top 5 songs:

Haunted

Last Kiss

Innocent

Enchanted

Castles Crumbling (ft. Hayley Williams)

Honourable mention: Dear John

album rating:

☆☆☆☆☆

I really love this album as a whole! And I like every single song on the album. No skips (apart of Never Grow Up because I don't want to start bawling in public). That's not the case with ever album (even the newer ones).

my favourite song:

How do you feel about this album?

[awritingblueberry]

Fearless

(Taylor’s Version)

released: November 11, 2008

rerecording release: April 9, 2021

country pop

Rating from September 21, 2025:

I listened to the rerecordings, NOT the originals!

1. Fearless ☆☆☆☆.5

This is one of my favourite songs! I love the happiness and the lyrics. Definitely goes on my Sunshine Playlist for good mood.

2. Fifteen ☆☆☆☆

I heard this song for the first time when I was grocery shopping. I love the storytelling and the lyrics.

3. Love Story ☆☆☆☆

This is so nostalgic. Funnily, the Taylor’s Version was released when we were reading Romeo and Juliet in English class. Perfect timing!

4. Hey Stephen ☆☆

It's a nice song, but it doesn't really speak to me.

5. White Horse ☆☆☆.5

This is almost TTPD level of songwriting! But it would hit harder if the melody was more devastating, like in How Did It End? for example.

6. You Belong With Me ☆☆☆

The nostalgia is back! It's simple, yet super catchy.

7. Breathe (ft. Colbie Caillat) ☆☆☆

I love the lyrics. But the melody isn't quite fitting. It's too happy for such sad lyrics, yet not catchy enough either.

8. Tell Me Why ☆☆☆☆☆

These are the vocals I want for Should've Said No. Also, great lyrics! And I have mentioned that I love mad Taylor. This is no exception.

9. You're Not Sorry ☆☆☆☆.5

This is the kind of devastating catchiness I want for White Horse and Breathe. There are too many "no"s at the end, though. Like, Taylor, we got it. No need to repeat yourself that many times.

10. The Way I Loved You ☆☆☆☆.5

Why is Taylor’s heartbreak bringing me so much joy?

11. Forever & Always ☆☆☆☆

Again, why? Also, I love the rock elements.

12. The Best Day ☆☆☆

It's such an adorable song! Did not make me cry. Nooo...

13. Change ☆☆☆☆

Could you call this Only The Young's predecessor? Because it really feels like it. And they say Taylor wasn't political back then... Young girls are just easier to ignore than billionaires, I guess.

14. Jump Then Fall ☆☆☆.5

I love how catchy and happy this song is.

15. Untouchable ☆☆

It's kind of catchy, but doesn't really speak to me either.

16. Forever & Always (Piano Version) ☆☆☆

This version is so much more devastating than the other version. But I feel like Taylor could sound more disappointed. Maybe the original recording sounds like that. I haven't listened to it yet.

17. Come In With The Rain ☆☆☆☆

This is the level of disappointment and devastation, I mean. Also, I love the lyrics.

18. Superstar ☆☆.5

I kind of like it. It has really adorable lyrics and is quite catchy.

19. The Other Side Of The Door ☆☆☆

I do like the lyrics and catchiness. But why the sudden end?

20. Today Was A Fairytale ☆☆☆☆

I love the happiness of this song. And the lyrics of course.

From The Vault:

21. You All Over Me (ft. Maren Morris) ☆☆☆.5

Another beautifully devastating song. Seriously, what did her ex do to her??? Something is missing in this song, though.

22. Mr. Perfectly Fine ☆☆☆.5

I really like this one, especially the bridge.

23. We Were Happy ☆☆☆

Did Aaron Dessner produce this? It sounds a little bit like the other songs he produced. I love how emotional this is, but I don't really like the lyrics.

24. That's When (ft. Keith Urban) ☆☆☆.5

I thought this one was also Aaron's production, but no, it was Jack Antonoff. Oops...

25. Don't You ☆☆☆☆

Well, this was definitely Jack. It's very much giving Midnights. They could've sneaked these last three songs into one of Taylors recent albums, and nobody would notice that they were written by a teenager.

26. Bye Bye Baby ☆☆☆☆.5

The chorus sound at parts like they sampled 'tolerate it'. I'm not the only one who hears that, right?

27. Love Story (Elvira Remix) ☆

I really don't like it. The remix kind of ruins the mood of the song. I like the 1989 remix way more.

my top 5 songs:

Tell Me Why

The Way I Loved You / Fearless

You're Not Sorry

Bye Bye Baby

Come In With The Rain

Honourable mention: Change

album rating:

☆☆☆

My favourite song:

How do you feel about this album?

[awritingblueberry]

Taylor Swift

Taylor’s debut album

released: 24 October 2006

written by Taylor since she was 13 y/o (how?!)

country

Rating from 21 September 2025

1. Tim McGraw ☆☆☆

It gives me a warm & nostalgic feeling, and I quite like the lyrics.

2. Picture To Burn ☆☆☆.5

I love Taylor’s angry songs! But the vocals could need some improvement. I bet the Taylor’s Version would sound great, though.

3. Teardrops On My Guitar ☆☆☆.5

I really like this song, but once again, the vocals don't sound that good. Even though I prefer this country version over the pop version, I feel like her vocals are better there and better mixed. The country version would sound better, if she sang it a bit deeper.

4. A Place In This World ☆.5

The lyrics in general are nice, but I find the chorus a bit too simple and repetitive for Taylor’s standards.

5. Cold As You ☆☆☆☆

I love the lyrics! How did a 13 - 15 year old write this, though? That's really impressive!

6. The Outside ☆☆☆.5

It's surprisingly catchy and I like the lyrics.

7. Tied Together With A Smile ☆☆☆

Really impressed by the songwriting and the beautiful & deep lyrics. This would sound so good as a Taylor’s Version.

8. Stay Beautiful ☆☆.5

It's not quite as good as the other songs (which is admittedly a high standard), but quite adorable and has a good bridge. The vocals, though ...

9. Should've Said No ☆☆☆☆

I really love mad Taylor. And the lyrics. With better vocals, that would easily be a favourite of mine.

10. Mary's Song (Oh My My My) ☆☆☆.5

I love the catchy melody and the storytelling.

11. Our Song ☆☆☆

I like the catchiness.

12. I'm Only Me When I'm With You ☆☆☆.5

I love how catchy this is. Also love the lyrics. They're really good!

13. Invisible ☆☆☆

This is a really lovely ballad. It would sound even better rerecorded, though.

14. A Perfectly Good Heart ☆☆☆☆.5

This song has the best vocals of the album! So much better than the rest that this is my favourite.

15. Teardrops On My Guitar (Pop Version) ☆☆☆☆

Since this has better vocals & mixing than the country version, I like this one more.

my top 5 songs:

A Perfectly Good Heart

Teardrops On My Guitar

Cold As You

Should've Said No

Mary's Song (Oh My My My)

Honourable Mention: I'm Only Me When I'm With You

album rating:

☆☆☆

It has nice songs and mostly good lyrics, but the vocals could definitely be improved. I think Debut (Taylor’s Version) with better vocals could even top Fearless in my ranking.

my favourite song:

How do you feel about this album?

[awritingblueberry]

Taylor Swift Song Ratings:

In preparation for the release of The Life of a Showgirl, I have rated all Taylor Swift songs. If you're interested in reading my ratings, you'll find the links to them below:

Links incoming ...

Taylor Swift (Debut)

Fearless (Taylor’s Version)

Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)

Red (Taylor’s Version)

1989 (Taylor’s Version)

Reputation

Lover

folklore

evermore

Midnights

The Tortured Poets Department

The Life of a Showgirl

Other songs

Conclusion

Rating key:

☆☆☆☆☆ (favourite song)

☆☆☆☆ (great song)

☆☆☆ (I like it)

☆☆ (it's alright)

☆ (absolutely not!)

[awritingblueberry]

What is going on today?

First, we get a sad KitTy letter (Kitty content! yay! 10/10)

Then Americans elect Trump president (again? wasn't one time enough? now poor Melania has to be first lady again! 0/10)

Apparently, Quatar decides against democracy? (Why? Idk... but go off, I guess...)

Then, America elects their first trans-woman into Congress. (10/10 Slay Queen!)

Then, some politicians in my country (Germany) demand new elections. (0/10 NOT the time, Friedrich and Markus! at least let us have a day to process the US-election!)

Then our finance minister joins those demands. (0/10, Christian apparently isn't aware that he is part of the government he's criticising...)

And then our chancellor snapped and threw the finance minister and his party out of the government (5/10 Finally Olaf! Was that smart, though? Little Christian is sad now...)

So now we probably have new elections in spring, and until then, a social-democratic and green government...

What a day...

Anything else, or can I go to bed now without missing any major political events?

Good thing I had my politics lecture today in the morning, or my professor would have spent the whole lecture talking about all of that... I fear for next week...

[mayaheronthorn]

I wonder how KitTy's proposal would look like. Who would be the one to propose, or would they accidentally do it at the same time. Where would they be? Would it be a small, private thing or a big party? Would they tell their family and friends beforehand? I need answers. I need them to live 😭

[awritingblueberry]

Since the delulu part of my soul thinks they're getting engaged and married in TWP, here's my headcannon:

They somehow end up in a situation that could split them forever, maybe Kit actually becoming Faerie King or something like that.

Since Ty doesn't want to loose Kit forever again, he decides to stay with him, even though that could mean that he won't be able to see his family much anymore.

Kit is obviously against that because of said reason and it's also quite impossible to permanently stay together since a Faerie King/Queen can't have Shadowhunters as consorts.

Ty, the smart boy he is, then tries to find a solution to this and learns that even faeries have to respect official relationships (aka marriages, parabatai, etc.) if they were made before the heir becomes King/Queen (I totally made that up!).

So Ty explains that to Kit and why he would choose him over his family and then basically proposes to Kit, who accepts.

And since the important part of the wedding are only the wedding runes on the heart (if I recall that correctly), they only need to do that and don't need anyone officiating the marriage.

So basically, they just do the wedding night part with the runes... in a cave, obviously.

I don't care if Kit actually becomes King afterwards or not, but that how I think they get married. In the end of TWP, they obviously have an actual wedding with their friends and families.

And they seem to be the people who, at least Ty, if not both, prefer a private wedding over a big party. Also, it would be kind of funny if they of all couples would be the one who accidentally waited until the wedding night for the spicy stuff. (The only other couple I can think of rn is Cordelia and James. And those slow idiots waited until months after their wedding, so I don't quite think that counts...)

(Also, if all if this doesn't make any sense, it's because it's midnight and I'm very tired 😅)

[witchlingcirce]

Okay I’m 100% in the minority, but if any of Kits parents were to be alive in Thule, I hope it’s Johnny.

Idk like imo that would be the angstiet situation. Like imagine if Thule Kit is dead, would Thule!Johnny treat our Kit better than reg world Johnny did???????????? I have a vision…

[awritingblueberry]

That reminds me of something: Remember how both of Kit's parents got killed almost at the same time but due to unrelated reasons? Rosemary shortly before or at the beginning of Lady Midnight (since Tessa and Jem are in LA there) because the faeries found and killed her. And Johnny, at the end of Lady Midnight, after he gets attacked by that demon. Meaning both of them died in 2012.

But the Thule "timeline" split from our world in 2007, and since Sebastians reign killed almost all downworlders, it's very unlikely that there are still faeries who are trying to kill Thule Rosemary (and Kit!) in 2012. This also eliminates the reason why Rosemary and Johnny are separated in the first place, so maybe with the threat to Kit's life gone, they get back together. And since Rosemary knows about having Shadowhunter blood, she might also be able to defend Johnny from the demon that killed him in Lady Midnight (if that situation even happens in the Thule timeline). Also, Rosemary and Johnny being together might actually make them decent parents. Meaning, theoretically, it's possible that the whole family survived in Thule.

But since a lot of characters that survived in our world are dead in Thule, I think there's a high possibility that Thule Kit is actually dead and just Johnny and Rosemary survived. And if our Kit goes to Thule in TWP he might get an equivalent to Ty and Thule Livvy in both of his parents.

[awritingblueberry]

Kit and James' gun

I think I just figured out why Kit can use James' gun.

I looked at, what both of them have in common:

male

teenager

Shadowhunter

downworlder heritage

Herondale

Herondale Heartbreak(TM)

Tessa as mother/motherly figure

unruned Shadowhunter ancestors

Unruned Shadowhunters are, as we know from Tessa’s mother, able to have children with demons, unlike runed Shadowhunters. James therefore is the grandson of a demon. And maybe Kit is too, if one of his grandparents (Rosemary's parents) had a fling with a demon, which resulted in Rosemary.

That would make Kit equally to James concerning the demon heritage, enabling him to use the gun.

And Rosemary would be equal to Tessa, also explaining, why Tessa felt so drawn to protect her and Kit. Maybe she was a shapeshifter, too, which may be the reason she managed to hide this long from the faeries.

Conclusion: Kit is able to use James' gun because he might have demon heritage as well. (Which honestly wouldn't surprise me with the collection of hertiages he already has...)

[awritingblueberry]

I usually don't post this here, but I'm just so proud of what I just drew that I just need to share it with you guys.

Here's my OC Johanna as a mermaid (don't mind the hands tho):

And as a comparison of what my drawings look like when all the energy went into the other picture, here's her half-sister Isabelle:

I literally forgot the lighting and had to erase the light part of her tail...

[awritingblueberry]

"For death and mourning the colour's white"

"Green will mend our broken hearts"

"Bone for those who don't grow old"

Who's wearing green on her cover and white/ivory (=bone) in her first appearance? Exactly. We should've known...

[awritingblueberry]

Can't believe I'm the first to say it... but So Long, London is such a KitTy song

I mean...

I saw in my mind fairy lights through the mist

Kit realising that he's not a mortal but a Shadowhunter with faerie heritage

Pulled him in tighter each time he was driftin' away

Kit hugging Ty on the roof of the LONDON institute and being there for him after Livvy's death

When you're not sure if he wants to be there

Kit thinking Ty doesn't love him

You sacrificed us to the gods of your bluest days

Livvy's death making Ty blind with grief and causing him to break Kit's heart

So Long, London

Had a good run

[awritingblueberry]

Really delulu and wild TWP theory

So I have this really delulu theory that most likely won't happen, but I still want you to know for the less than 1% chance that I'm right and I get to tell you "told you so":

Attention: Chain of Thorns spoilers ahead!!!

So we all know that Grace and Christopher were supposed to get married, right? But then Christopher was killed. Not before having some chemistry with Grace though. (I mean why did Cassie write the scenes where Christopher goes to the Silent City to talk to Grace, and why did they have the lab scene after he died, if they weren't supposed to have some kind of romantic connection?)

We also know that Grace was literally raised by the woman who went completely mad after losing her husband. What if Grace also goes a little bit mad and tries to bring Christopher back? Just she actually uses her braincells, science, and magic and manages to travel back in time to save Christopher. But she knows she can't just let him be there because that could mess up everything that happens afterwards. (Christopher's death was a big motivation for all the characters to fight Belial). So, Grace tries to make her and Christopher time travel back to her present time, but accidentally adds a few (or a hundred) years.

This means that in the chronological timeline, everything would happen as it's written in the books. Everyone still thinks that Christopher is dead and Grace just randomly disappeared some time after Chain of Thorns.

But then they just appear out of nowhere in 2015 and somehow get involved in TWP.

Meaning: Grace and Christopher can finally get married and Tessa and Jem are happy that their nephew survived.

Nobody be mad at me, I told you it was very delulu!

What do you think of this theory?