Lol Memes And Shit @b-tweets-me-and-u - Tumblr Blog

I love how medieval wizards would write shit like "We all know the testicles are controlled by the position of mars" just incomprehensible king, please continue.

wizardlyghost

rslashrats

sorry i put some landmines on my blog ^_^

rslashrats

*immediately forgets about the landmines* lemme get some cheezey snacks lalala ! lalala ! lal-

lesbianboboberens

recreational space travel is objectively immoral

lesbianboboberens

i am like. absolutely livid.

CO2 emissions for one ~4 person tourist space trip are 50-100 times higher than the emissions from one long-haul air flight. One SpaceX flight generates the annual carbon footprint of 278 people. Space travel is the equivalent of vomiting greenhouse gases directly into the atmosphere and it is like spitting in the rest of the world’s face.

People literally are getting sick from West Coast wildfire smoke in NYC, Philadelphia, and Toronto right now. Extreme weather has caused flooding in Germany that has killed more than 150 people. The heat wave in the Northwest in June killed hundreds. The entire American West is going through a drought with the some of the most extreme conditions they have seen in 20 years. We are living through a climate crisis that is going to get worse and worse and worse and it is not only evil and cruel to refuse to do anything about it (with your BILLIONS of dollars!) but absolutely morally rotten to continue contributing to climate change that will kill millions.

Private space travel is irredeemable and evil.

thefuzzydave

drinkyourjuiceshelby

stupidbeecandle

I lived and worked in a lighthouse at a previous job. There was a thick line painted in a circle around the shack where the fog signal was kept. The line represented how close you could get to the fog signal without experiencing physical harm in the form of eardrums shattering or worse.

Even in the house it was LOUD. Probably the loudest thing I have ever experienced but at a normal, predictable interval. You would begin to time your sentences with little pauses with the rest of the lighthouse crew so you would talk like this while making your………..HORN…………. tea and then carry on talking because you knew when it would go off. It rattled the walls and the dishes in our cabinet.

At least one girl had died there. They kept photos of her everywhere “in honor of her sacrifice” because she had decided to take the winter watch alone and died in a storm where bounders the size of mini vans had been lifted out of the ocean and left scattered across the island, to say nothing of the ice chunks. People weren’t allowed to be alone on the watch after that.

One day a dead moose washed up on shore and it took my entire crew all day but we managed to rig up a line to hang it up to dry because we thought having a moose skeleton in the house would really spice the living room up a bit. It did. Weird shit happens when six of you are left alone, like ALONE ALONE, no cell reception, no wifi, just a radio to contact the real world and not a lot of reason to do that. People don’t go on lighthouse jobs if they want to stay connected, I’ve found.

That said Id do it all again, I really do treasure those days

glowingghosty

evandash

Placing these one after another makes it look like he left got a lighthouse job and came back six months later to update the drive through employee

tiktoksthataregood-ish

e-v-roslyn

Queen

gaysemiotics

Give her her own tv show

pukicho

Everyone who has heard the term “guerrilla warfare” has also briefly imagined a war made up of gorillas - this is the one connecting thread that every single one of us on this planet share, surpassing race, virtues, culture and more. If you’re ever feeling lonely, know that at one point, all of us thought this very same thought.

lesbiangalacticgoddess

Hey OP, you do know that not everyone in the world is a native English speaker right?

pukicho

No this is news to me

Thanks for the murder thing tho, definitely a balanced, tame reaction to this made-up post that’s clearly not meant to be taken seriously.

rainydayscore

aflo

*opens the oven after preheating to 400*

whoreapologist

i love abortion and i love divorce

red-twist

i pop some pills and i ride my horse

tuckerrule

i log onto tumblr and i start discourse

faggybutch161

eyyyy macarena

fangcore

this has the strongest 2014 tumblr vibe i’ve seen in a while, can’t believe this post is 5 days old

adorablecake

THIS POST IS FIVE DAYS OLD???? I THOUGHT IT WAS AT LEAST 2 YEARS OLD!!!!!!!

whoreapologist

happy 9 day anniversary to this post 💖

heritage-post

date of origin: April 18, 2021

best-blurst-of-times

ironbite4

Teachers have tried this and are amazed when their classes don’t go feral like in the book. It’s almost as if the book was supposed to be satire and not a treaty on the nature of humanity.

thedarkbutbeige

spaceshipoftheseus

there’s a timeskip

THERE’S A TIMESKIP

after losing control of the signal fire there’s a FUCKING TIMESKIP and when the next chapter starts everyone’s hair is several inches longer and their clothes have rotted to shreds and they’re still just kind of chilling!!!!

IT TAKES THE TERRIBLE IMPERIALISM MIND-POISONED EXCESSIVELY BRITISH BOYS IN THE ACTUAL BOOK SEVERAL MONTHS TO COMMIT A SINGLE ACT OF INTENTIONAL VIOLENCE, EVEN THE ONE (1) CHILD WRITTEN AS AN ACTUAL SOCIOPATH

AND then when they DO turn on each other it is because

THERE’S AN UNSPECIFIED WORLD WAR HAPPENING

AND A PILOT’S CORPSE CRASH LANDS ON THE ISLAND POST-DOGFIGHT AND THE CHILDREN MISTAKE THE PARACHUTE FOR A MONSTER AND SPIRAL INTO PARANOIA

BECAUSE CHILDREN INHERIT THE LEGACY AND TRAUMA OF VIOLENCE FROM THE ADULTS WAGING WAR AROUND THEM

HURR DURR IN THE REAL WORLD IT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN LIKE IN LORD OF THE FLIES -

IT DIDN’T HAPPEN THAT WAY IN LORD OF THE FLIES EITHER YOU JUST HAVEN’T READ IT SINCE HIGH SCHOOL IF EVER AND DON’T REMEMBER WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED IN THE GODDAMN BOOK

randomslasher

mayfriend-archive

#tbf the dude wrote it to be a dick

yes. yes he did. i’m also gonna direct you to the real life ‘lord of the flies’ which occured in the 1960s, when six tongan schoolboys got stranded on a desert island for over a year before being rescued by an australian fisherman (who, it should be noted, later took on all six as crewmembers because the reason they were out in the first place was because they wanted to see the world, and named his ship the Ata after the island they were stranded on). nobody died. the only injuries that occurred were accidental, and when one of the boys broke his leg falling down a cliff, the others braced it and looked after him so well that it healed perfectly. if they argued, then they would literally go to opposite sides of the island until they’d cooled off. after leaving the island, they remained friends for the rest of their lives. here’s a photo of them as adults, with their rescuer (who is third from the left) and other members of his crew.

i read about this in rutger bregman’s human kind, a book i cannot recommend highly enough, but if you don’t want to go and read a whole book about the inherent goodness of humanity (which again, you really should) then the relevant excerpt can be found here.

mayfriend-archive

aeonchangeling

Plus the author specifically wrote it in stark opposition to the trend of the time. Lots of author were writing about British school kids getting stranded on a deserted island and having a grand old adventure… and if their were natives on the island, they’d basically be worshiped because racism.

dirudo

Lmao ur cute af lemme talk to you

talk then

demisatyr

the power that radiates from this post

cikero

[names my sons cain and abel] alright. get to it

satanstrousers

One of my friends asked me the other day if I would suck one thousand dicks for a billion dollars, and I love questions like that because not only are they so demonstrative of the no-homo society we live in, but they also show a fundamental lack of understanding that some people have for the value of money. Like, do you realize just how much money one billion dollars is? Do you realize I could live my life in the lap of luxury buying literally everything I could ever want and still have a fortune to leave to my children?? For sucking some dicks?? We are talking 1 million dollars per dick sucked!! That’s just economical like come on man.

seauxamerican-deactivated201705

1 billion dollars and all you’d have to do is suck a dick every day for the next 2.7 years. That’s it. Plenty of people already do that. You could quit your job and literally suck dick for a living. You could suck two dicks a day and only have to suck dick for 1.4 years. You could suck 5 dicks a day for about 6 months. 5 DICKS A DAY FOR 6 MONTHS FOR A BILLION DOLLARS, OF COURSE I’LL FUCKIN DO THAT. THAT’S THE DREAM, THAT’S FUCKIN HEAVEN.

ginnymcqueen-deactivated2017043

And I’m over here doin’ it for free like a fucking asshole.

idareu2bme

I almost spat my drink out all over my screen when I read that last comment

randomslasher

See my thing is nowhere does it specify the duration for which I must suck each dick. I’m not being asked to bring each dick to any kind of conclusion. I just have to suck it. That could be like. For a second or two. I could knock that out in a day if I lined them up efficiently. Assembly line this sucker.

theoldness

oatisaeris

maretriarch

bi women who lean more towards men r literally so strong this isn't even a joke the biphobia they face for literally no reason is fucking crazy

sapphictwink

so many people in the comments completely missing the point.... “plus they have to deal with MEN disgusting men are so gross!!” like bro that’s an example of the biphobia we’re referring to!!!!!