BagelKat

Call me Bagel! She/they, young adult Mostly UnderTale multiverse and social commentary; Occasional Hollow Knight and/or Silksong; rare Task Master; very rare MCYT. FAIR WARNING: I reblog stuff without tags alot cause I'm lazy so if you have tags blocked that I'm likely to reblog don't follow me.

[spotaus]

hey!

I am back with another New Age AU thought :D

remember how we said that Ccino takes care of all the cats in the castle but when asked says he has no cats?

Killer. the loveable menace. totally likes ccino and is like... trying to sneak something of a pressie for affection in.

Keep those two facts in mind.

Now. Aparently. it is a believe that vikings used to give their new wives kittens. To be part of the new household and set it up. Because freya, the goddess of love was believed to ride a cart drawn by a team of cats.

I imagine that killer on a lot of his travels/jobs/shenenigans learned this fact.

and eventually. he just. gives Ccino a kitten. He makes up excuses like he found it and figured ccino would know how to care for a kitten (ignoring the fact he knows it himself)

ccino eventually sighs but does take the kitten.

killer meanwhile: mission successful. we are viking engaged and no one has to know EVER!

it is just killer's little secret :3 his to enjoy and not bother anyone or tip any powerbalance or anything. Just a little secret for him to enjoy <3

That was my thought. :) enjoy.

Omg.... you were right, I AM SHAKING YOU!!!!!

No but fr this is so so so sweet... there is, in fact one (1) cat who he's willing to partially take ownership of and it's that Kitten Killer gifted to him... (probably says, 'Oh that's [name] it's technically mine.') Or smth along those lines haha!

I'm imagining this one is like, a nice Calico? She was a ratty lil thang when Killer happened across her (I think this is after getting Dust + Horror but before the Cross, so he was settling into that power dynamic and respecting Ccino more). A mission to hunt down some escaped criminals who were harassing the guard a few cities away from the capital, and Killer nearly stepped on the poor thing while he and Dust were headed back. But he spotted her just in-time and swerved out of the way, just to realize it was small and weak and like... completely alone?

And ofc Dust noticed and (unaware of Killer's schemes and/or love for cats) kinda expected him to just keep moving or kick the thing. Killer, instead, scooped up the mewling lil dirt clump and tucked it into his armor for safe-keeping. He took the thing back, cleaned and nursed her a bit (so she wouldn't, y'know, be sickly before he asked Ccino to care for her) and then played it off like he'd brought her back from a later mission abd asks Ccino to care for her.

And that cat LOVES Ccino. Like, one who's glued to his side all the time. Has a special little bow around her neck because she's the one cat Ccino let's himself claim as his. And any other time? She's around Killer. Certainly a vibe-check pass via Cat in Ccino's books lol-

And I'm writing this rather tiredly so things are subject to change- but I LOVE this concept Ancha!! One viking declaration of love kitten to give off the correct energy for the cat guys <3

(^ By subject to change I do also like the idea that Killer gifted this cat shortly before the whole Nightmare Teen Scenario so there were already plenty of cats lingering around all the time, and this one was just a little inside secret for himself- but I can't help but add pets w/ personality haha!)

[ancha-aus]

AM being SHOOK :D

Ccino does't have a favourite cat. he only has ONE cat so it isn't like he can pick a favourite. how he got it? Oh someone brought it to him to take care of so ccino feels actually responsible over this one.

a calico! SUch a sweet idea and a little lady with a nice bow just following ccino around like a little princess. She is gonna stay near dad and if she can't be near dad she will go to other dad for treats and pets <3

(okay and i love that timing. like. killer is getting more and more important and it is becoming obvious for outsiders that killer is a powerful guy and ccino is 'just' a servant. it is painfully obvious and killer doesn't want to cause issues for ccino because mutual respect)

the idea that dust was fully convinced that killer would just ignore the cat or push it out of the way. dust knows he wouldn't hurt the cat. the rules on how cats should be treated with respect and how killer was always nice to the castle cats proves this. but kiler picking the little girl up? taking her with them and nursing her back to health? yeah dust didn't expect that. (dust also shooting killer sus looks after he sees ccino walking around with that SAME cat and taking care of her. dust sees something is going on over here)

I am happy you like it!

one sneaky viking engagement! Just for killer to enjoy and hold dear to his soul as he watches the one he is never allowed to have walk around with their cat <3

(whenever it works best for you and timeline wise :D it was just a cute idea i wanted to share <3)

[spotaus]

Ehehehe! >:]

[ancha-aus]

:D

[spotaus]

Hey i am back with another thought.

Remember how ccino was unamused with nightmare bringing a serial killer home as possible knight?

Inagine his annoyance when it HAPPENS AGAIN with dust!

And dust needs like 4 magic dampers.

Nightmare just standing there: i found another possible knight

Ccino staring at the criminal: ... i will go prepare a room *leaves*

And then.

Later!

Ccino walks out to meet nightmare and stops because he sees a giant skeleton behind nightmare with a hole in his skull!

Ccino: ...

Nightmare who can feel that ccino is THIS close to snapping: ... this one isnt a criminal.

Ccino takes a deep breath. Nods. And leaves. He does not like this pattern.

And then cross gets caught

Killer: lmao. Wonder why nightmare is leaving him in the jailcell instead of just punishment

Dust and horror shooting each other knowing looks.

ccink just leaves because APPARENTLY he needs to prepare ANOTHER room now >:(

Some kids bring back rocks or plants or insects or wounded animals..

Nightmare brings back criminals. (Which is even funnier because nightmare also hires wrongly judged people as his servants).

No wonder the cats swarm the castle. It is already full of strays.

Hi I *know* you have another ask in my inbox that I need to address (because I love it to death and need to make a coherent answer that isn't just me key-smashing-) but I saw this one fresh off the send and I need to respond because this one !!!!! Is so silly but so true!!!

Yeah, Ccino is a very kind and loving soul but like. In the way parents can still get annoyed w/ their kids, this is Ccino's peev. Every single time Nightmare comes back with a criminal Ccino has to take a deep breath abd count to 5 before he can respond in any proper way. And he *knows* Night knows how worried abd frustrated he his! Because!! Of all the people to bring in when you're paranoid of getting murdered? The serial killers???

Dude I also love the thought that Dust had a couple dampeners so he couldn't harm anyone or run off, and the longer he behaves the more Night takes off. (And Night *really* wants to see Dust at his full power, but he can't risk being hasty-)

Horror, who arguably looks the most like a criminal, actually got into a heated argument with a friend as a teenager and ended up with a huge skull wound. He's actually a sweetheart! (<- to his family at least-) Ccino is just happy it's not another criminal frfr.

And then Cross.

The visual that Killer has yet to pick up on the signs of Night preparing to collect another knight is SO silly but also SO him. He's blind-sided when he's put in charge of Dust to train him for knighthood. He's blindsided when Horror is adopted into the Knights. He's also blindsided when Nightmare firmly tells everyone that Cross will be helping them. 🙏 (and then he becomes a Knight)

Poor Ccino putting up with these guys... <3

Oh yeah, stray city! Nightmare (if he did have godlike powers) definitely gives off a domain of safety for misfits + survivors. Like, Reaper's kingdom has a great reputation but. Nightmare is very specifically keen on helping people and taking care of them (even as they take care of him). So the cats, the wrongly-accused criminals, and the *rightly*-accused criminals who he thinks can change are all his now :] He attracts them like a beacon lol!

[ancha-aus]

YES HI I AM HERE <3 :D

hihihihih I am happy you liked it :D

and don't worry about the other ask. i did just kinda spring that on you with only tiny plot points so take all the time you need :D I am excited to hear your reaction though :3 (ccino my beloved)

ANd yes!! This one is more silly!

ccino is ddoing like the hand thing in his room where he takes so many deep breaths. and counts to five. then to ten. then to ten again! and then he is a bit calmer and ready to play his role of head of the house (if you look at the other drabble this title gets SO MUCH MORE meaning) and he goes to meet the new guests and hopes no one gets stabbed. but yeah when nightmare becomes a teen again ccino really jsut sits in his room. realising that nightmare 100% did the kid thing about bringing random animals back to the house and 'can i keep them please? i promise i will take care of it!' instead of animals it were just criminals. (tbf. nightmare did take care of them)

you told me he had very strong magic and already had many on in his old prison to keep him in check! There is no way nightmare would immediantly trust dust enough to undo those :D but over time. because he watns to know. he wants to SEE the power. (and holy shit it IS powerful!)

horror looks the worst! But honestly? amazing guy. he and ccino cook together sometimes. (the food for the knights) so ccino actually warms up to him rather quickly.

and cross <3 our special boi.

and yeah i totally see killer doing the surprised pikachu meme. even though this already happened TRICE before. One of which was KILLER HIMSELF.

Ccino puts up with so much. really proves how much he loves his little brother.

all the strays find a home in the capital of nightmare's country. <3 it is beautiful and a clean start for anyone who is willing to do one. it is no wonder that cross found his home herer <3

[spotaus]

Hah!

Yes! I can't wait to reply because I love that ask so dearly. I just. I need to formulate how giddy it makes me hehe!

Yeah, you phrased it perfectly, Ccino sees so vividly that Night never truly outgrew those childish habits. (BRO he so did take care of them too- Night was such a responsible "kid" Ccino couldn't really convince him out of anything cuz he overthought so so much. If he's going for it (post-Killer. That one was Impulsive) he probably believes he can handle the consequences-)

Oh yeah, for sure- Nightmare makes sure to get a really good Read on Dust's faint magic signature so he could chase him down if Dust ever runs, but.... Dust's been rotting in jail for a while, and w/o his full magic he wouldn't get very far- hehe. By the time he's free abd strong again, the gigs way better than his old job-

Ough, Horror and Ccino cooking together? Horror probably the first one to actually get Ccino's explicite praise? Omg... If Night likes you that's one thing, but *Ccino* specifically getting along w/ you? Wild. Unheard of among the Knights. If Horror were a lesser man he would brag about it-

I think I'm missing smth but I'm stealing what u said in the tags rq abd pulling it to the main portion cuz I'm obsessed!!!

Yes, Killer is trying to fix his screw-up so so badly. And, a man who is horrible with boundaries, he doesn't know that Dust was keen on staying mysterious and cool! He just wanted the two people he'd fallen for to see him at his best! Focused, cunning, chattering playfully, enjoying himself "off the job". (Side note: Dust has, at this point, gotten to hear Geno and Reaper talk casually between eachother too. Out of habit they don't think much of Dust's presence, so they're more comfy being themselves around their escort. They know NOTHING of Dust aside from praises sung by Nightmare, then all the talking Killer did about how cool and strong Dust was.) So tbh it'd be the perfect plan. For literally anyone aside from Dust.

Dust is flustered, and angry, and wants to skedaddle as fast as possible. And technically the wound does it, but that did NOT help his already wounded pride. He didn't want *anyone* seeing that, let alone the king and the wizard who he's crushing on.

And the fact that he just rushes out the moment he catches his breath? Like, I can just imagine Horror's eyelight filling with worry and hurrying over to help him up. (Shocked he even landed such a solid hit). And Dust using his free hand to tug his hood up further and hurry out. Not even hanging up his training armor or anything. Killer is probably horrified, and Cross is quick to hop in and insist they take a break for a bit. (He immediately wants to go check in on Dust, even though he's already sat himself in his room to die of shame for looking so weak.

(I almost like the idea that Dust, reacting poorly to the pain as well as being so frustrated with Killer, straight up requires *Night* to come to the door for him to unlock the door. And even then he tells Nightmare nit to worry about it, that he's just mad at Killer for a dumb prank. But he gives Killer the silent treatment unless it's smth for the job. It takes like. Several weeks for him to cut Killer some slack. Probably only after Night figures out what's going on when Geno and Reaper (who went home) keep asking after Dust's health in their letters and he connects them directly.)

Oh! Abd Night *definitely* keeps Dust close! Just like he did when Killer was hurt, Dust is either resting or right by his side, abd when he's Resting Night is probably still around. He doesn't want anything happening to his brother!

And just. Killer fearing he like. Screwed up so big-time? Trying to make it up to him? Waughhh. It's definitely a tender process because they're both big boys who know better, but they're also the most spiteful, petty people in the castle. It's hard for Killer to earn Dust's trust back. It happens, but it's slow-going.

(Later on, Dust credits Killer for helping him find his partners. Not to his face, ofc, but he could admit anyway that if Gen and Reaper hadn't seen Horror obliterate his shoulder he would've never actually talked to them. To Killer's face, he credits Horror for the fantastic punch 🙏 This drives Killer crazy-)

Okay 1 more sidetrack. The hit was HARD. Because, y'know, heavy-hitter trained by a God (basically) is so used to his opponent dodging that he goes full-force. That hit left some scars even after thorough healing. I think Dust probably gains some mobility issues in that arm, but on the bright side he doesn't really use that arm. And it's got a sick pattern in his bones now. (Also maybe. Just maybe. To be a tad indulgent. When he, Geno, abd Reaper are courting, Geno kisses the old scars w/ lil pecks out of affection. On a day where it was sore Geno made an 'I'll kiss it to make it feel better' joke and actually did and Dust blushed so hard they thought he had a fever, so now it's like a habit lmao-)

Okay I'm done now---

[mf-dooom]

[yetanothergreyjedi]

that is the face of a man worried he will be next

[ashtraythief]

Good news, he was not next! In fact, she accepted him as her mate, he learned the crane mating dance and now every year, he artificially inseminates her with crane semen to expand the very endangered crane population. True story.

[luulapants]

Sorry, he WHAT? Imagine being this man's boss and having to sit him down like. Listen. Brian. We need you to fuck the bird. You have to act like you're excited about it.

[whetstonefires]

crane husband.....

[roach-works]

this is the diametric opposite of all those awful swan wife stories and i love it.

[alex51324]

(WalWaPo makes you jump through like three separate hoops before you can read the article, so I will share some of the highlights:

Walnut was born in a species-recovery breeding program in the 1980′s.  The program had crane chicks hand-raised by human volunteers, and at that time they did not fully understand the measures necessary make sure that the chicks do not imprint on humans and retain their identity as cranes.  

As a result, her keepers believe, Walnut does not recognize other cranes as members of her own species.  

It has not been proven that Walnut killed her previous suitors; however, there is a persistent rumor in the white-naped-crane-conservation community that she did.  

Because this species is highly endangered, and the gene pool of the captive population is small, it’s pretty important for the survival of her species that Walnut A) mate, and B) not kill a bunch of other cranes.  

The actual name of the keeper is Chris Crowe.

They both arrived at the Smithsonian Conservation Biology Institute in 2004.   

Walnut immediately began paying special attention to Chris--and ignoring the eligible male crane in a nearby enclosure.  

Walnut initiated their courtship, performing the opening moves of a mating dance.  

Chris realized that if he reciprocated the mating dance, it might be possible to artificially inseminate Walnut with her participation and consent.  (The process normally involves restraining the bird.)  

It worked!  

Chris and Walnut have had five children, who were raised by other crane couples at the facility--sometimes the biological dad and his mate--both because it’s unclear whether Walnut would accept the chicks as her own, and because Chris is not equipped to be a Crane Dad.  

However, the Institute provides her with artificial eggs to sit on, and Chris takes his turn looking after them.  (This would not work with real eggs because he can’t sit on them properly, but Walnut seems to feel that he is on the job if he just stands over them.)

Chris accepts that he is pretty much married to this bird.  White-naped cranes live to be about 60, and they mate for life, so he knows he can’t retire while Walnut is alive.  (At the time of the article, Walnut was 36, and Chris 42.)  

[thesylverlining]

Legit cannot pick the funniest part of this

she has not been PROVEN to have killed her exes, but there is a PERSISTENT RUMOR (really officers she's simply DEVASTATED, she sobs, wearing a new feather boa unfortunately resembling her most recent deceased husband)

His name is Chris CROWE. (Mrs. Walnut Crane-Crowe?)

the mental images of a whole human man learning and performing the crane mating dance, and "sitting" on artificial eggs so she thinks he's performing his duties as a husband and father (and apparently OBJECTS if he does not?)

"chris, buddy, you gotta marry the possibly-murderous crane lady for the GOOD OF THE SPECIES." (alternately: "chris, my man! good news! we found you a very interested lady! She's 36, she's very spirited and independent, she holds a very important and rare status in her society! ...Is there a downside? WELL...")

chris sits any potential human partners down, like "my love, you must understand before we wed,,, i am already... Attached" (camera drifts wistfully to the above photo) "Lady Walnut and I have an,, Understanding... the relationship is open, but very committed"

[anais-ninja-bitch]

just had to explain this post to my father bc he thought my stifled laughter was a signal of illness.

well done, everyone, good game. hit the showers.

[largishcat]

[eshlimoriarty]

[lazorsandparadox]

Not only is he 'married' to walnut, this has apparently happened SEVERAL times, so he has MULTIPLE crane wives, none of which know about any of his other crane wives. This man is, for some unknown reason, irresistible to cranes

[queersatanic]

the “this content has been removed for violating Tumblr’s Community Guidelines” notice really adds a lot of flavor to this post and somehow makes it MORE obscene than whatever that actually was

[worldheritageposts-official]

World Heritage Post

[kedreeva]

I regret being the bearer of bad news, but I thought it should be shared that Walnut passed away in January of this year (2024). There's a lot of mixed info about the lifespan of cranes (due to people misunderstanding what a median is...) but the average for most species I know of is 20-30 years (in the wild if nothing eats them/they don't die young), and 30-45 in captivity, with the oldest known white-naped crane having loved to be 46. Given that she was 42, this old gal did good, and I'm certain she will be missed by folks here.

[optimysticals]

Fly on forever Walnut Crane-Crowe

[discreet45]

[fiztheancient]

i cant believe there are people who still havent seen this video

[the-haiku-bot]

i cant believe there

are people who still havent

seen this video

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I still find it pretty funny that in fallout 3 you can get your karma down by just opening Moriarty’s terminal over and over again.

The slavers at paradise falls have heard of me. I’m the guy that opens people’s computers over and over again without asking first.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Butch won’t be my companion. He’s like you’re too intense. You must’ve turned on that computer like 50 times in a row last time.

[what-even-is-thiss]

My forbidden computer touching ways have caught up with me.

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason I’m doing this in the first place is that a lot of evil karma options in fallout 3 are just inconvenient. Like I could go out of my way to blow up a city or I could not blow up a city and get a much more convenient free house and keep access to their merchants.

So in order to keep getting the full evil karma experience, every time I do something convenient or utilitarian that raises my karma I go back to Moriarty’s Saloon and just open his terminal over and over again.

Thus, my good boy points are eliminated through repeated computer touching and the regulators here are hunting me down for looking at Moriarty’s personal data a hundred times in a row.

[what-even-is-thiss]

What’s really funny about lowering your karma this way is that after you do a major good Karma action and listen to the radio, the radio DJ Three Dog will be like this horrible fucker from vault 101 we all hate him so much you know that guy? He did another fucking thing. He saved a thousand orphans.

[pris-cas]

Lesson #19 Throw pt.2

Cause pt. 1 was kinda eh here is another

Credit to whomever came out with shaded stick figure Rocky I couldn’t find the og creator

First lesson Previous lesson Next lesson

Thank you to my awsome beta readers!

@xushibeetle

@the-asexual-winter

@stelosia

[homunculus-argument]

Autism is some monkey's paw sort of shit, you've got the power to give people the most devastating rip-your-scalp-off level insults that will haunt them for life, with a completely straight face, but the catch is that you don't do it on purpose and also have no idea that you're doing it at all before people get mad at you for no apparent reason again.

[cupophrogs]

How would Sugar react if she saw not infected child? Instant bite, or maybe will try to become friends?

[spotlightstudios]

Hello party, I am folding under absolutely zero pressure 🫶

[frogsforthefrogwar]

I wish more people understood that sexual assault and harassment happen regardless of whether the perpetrator is attracted to the victim. Sexual harassment is frequently a social punishment for being undesirable

[frogsforthefrogwar]

god, so i saw a terf reblog this, which ive been worried would happen ever since it broke containment. To clarify, people's willingness to look away from sexual assault and harassment when it happens to people they deem undesirable is a large part of transphobia.

trans people are constant targets for for sexual abuse in a society that only ever sees them as perpetrators. This is not an accident. To a transphobic society trans people are inconvenient and undesirable victims. They are forcibly denied victim status and painted as monstrous to justify their continued abuse

[razorberries-art]

✨ Fascinating ✨ ◦ Watercolor & ink on paper ◦ available

[bovineblogger]

LEAPS N BOUNDS!!!!

[doombellow]

@joy-and-whimsy-official

[joy-and-whimsy-official]

Joy and whimsy detected! This bison is joyful and whimsical!

[ancha-aus]

Ancha please explore the wonders of Project Hail Mary

hahaha i want to. but also. No focus and stufff and reading takes motivation

[mikimakiboo]

Insurance: hi we insure cars :)

Me: hello I would like to insure my car :)

Insurance: lmao no, we can't insure you if your driver's license isn't at least two years old

Me:

Insurance: also you bought your car before insuring it so fuck you

Me:

[what-even-is-thiss]

Here’s the thing. Refusing to accept a compliment can be mildly insulting to the person you’re refusing the compliment from.

It’s like you don’t believe them or don’t respect their opinion basically.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I know, I also have self esteem so low that accepting a compliment feels physically painful but basically calling the person who’s complimenting you a liar doesn’t help anybody including yourself.

[writing-prompt-s]

The summoned hero has one critical flaw: They have sociopathic and psychopathic traits. However, psychopathy and sociopathy don't automatically equate to being a bad person. The hero genuinely tries to do the right thing, resulting in situations which are either hilarious or horrifying...

[mikimakiboo]

Insurance: hi we insure cars :)

Me: hello I would like to insure my car :)

Insurance: lmao no, we can't insure you if your driver's license isn't at least two years old

Me:

Insurance: also you bought your car before insuring it so fuck you

Me: