Milquetoastiest

⟨ Mes ★ They/Them ★ 29 ★  Icon by Pinkhounds⟩

[whoznoah]

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes only to turn around and to your horror: the pot.

[notallmensheviks]

catholic pez

[rat-mama]

[mitski-miyawakis]

[shoelace-and-friends]

[spacecrygirl]

[oe6]

[stealingpotatoes]

life can't be that bad when there's still cat and other assorted creatures

[endivinity]

Saguaro redraw from some years back! good ol long cactus

[caats]

[doppostims]

fire salamander ceramic art by claypigeonpottery

[crtastrophic]

they’re friends :)

[johnwaynegayscene]

[fleshdyke]

you cant fucking hurt me bitch im protected by the migratory bird act

[fallenangelvictorious]

Please, I just want to know what your migratory flight path is, I promise I’ll release you after I give you this bracelet that will insanely up your game with the ladies

[fleshdyke]

bitches love me for my bright and colourful leg band

[loumandliker]

one thing about americans is that they know how to make a fucking milkshake

[loumandliker]

i hate the stupid milk consistency shit you get here like if you give me a milkshake it better be rock fucking solid. i want that thang thick like concrete. it should piss me off trying to drink it through a straw. i should have to wait for it to thaw

[caltracat]

[behindnightmaresanddreams]

Americans are so good at making Beverage. One of our Foundational Moments was actually a party involving Making Beverage. Google "Boston Tea Party" for more

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[daftpatience]

slow down for your disabled friends. thats like a bare minimum kindness that we shouldnt have to ask for. i love that youre so quirky and walking fast is a cool personality trait to you and all that but i bet you can count your physically disabled friends on less than one hand

[romanceyourdemons]

if i had a time machine and i wanted to absolutely destroy an ancient emperor or king, i would take them to the shark tunnel of an aquarium. giving them an ozymandias view of their legacy would do nothing, they can see that all empires rot just by looking around them. but the shark tunnel of an aquarium is something they haven’t seen before, something no one has seen before, something magnificent that they could build with technology only slightly out of their reach. they would bankrupt their nation trying to recreate that shark tunnel for themself. their dynasty would collapse within three generations, and, if heaven is on my side, they themself will be eaten by a shark to the delight of generations of historians to come

[bogleech]

A guy in an entomology group I'm in got a confirmed brown recluse bite because he felt something tickle his neck and brushed it off, accidentally mashing the spider against his skin. This is how almost all recluse bites happen since they're very very unaggressive. Anyway the bite was just a small nasty spot that cleared up on its own, but his hands and feet swelled up really bad. Then when the swelling went back down, all his calluses were loose and just fell right off leaving his hands and feet like brand new???????????

[todaysbird]

fun thing about herding and/or generally neurotic breeds: they are really good at following rules you have instituted, but they will also make their own Dog Rules they will follow stringently whether or not you like it

[todaysbird]

despite never being reprimanded for getting sick if my dog throws up she will ‘tattle’ on herself and run over to me, show me the throw up, then hide and start shaking uncontrollably. nobody taught her to do this. she has decided that throwing up is a punishable offense until the end of time

[ajarofpickledtears]

[todaysbird]

my dog has decided that it’s solely on her shoulders to ensure there is peace in my house…if the cats fight she stands between them to ‘break it up’ and/or herds them away, if my rats have an argument she goes to the cage door and barks until they stop. not sure why she has decided she must carry the weight of the world but she has

[fauxcoral]

[utopians]

do you think it keeps travis up at night that justin is effortlessly the gayest and cuntiest brother

[louferrignojrofficial]

what’s happening with santa