dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
will byers stan first human second
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@bartangulontheturquoise
dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats
hey man can i bum a couple of fire arrows
My nickname in wizard school
I’M RIGHT BEHIND YOU
Thank you Evil Wizard, it’s good to know someone has our backs
IN A SCARY WAY
Thank you Evil Wizard, finally someone to scare away the creeps!
I FEEL LIKE WE NEED TO WORK ON OUR COMMUNICATION
You are a wizard and you witness a murder through your orb, happening in real time, in a private location you would not have physical access to.
Is your evidence admissible in court?
It is the same as witnessing through a window and would be admissible.
Come back with a warrant. It is a breach of privacy and would not be admissible.
you know ableism among purveyors of the arcane arts is a rather important subject that I nary see my fellow wizards cover. for example, what of the fact that much of basic magic requires you see things to cast? should the blind not sling fireballs at ne’er-do-wells, simply because they are blind?
and DONT bring up the “magic can restore one’s sight Bartangulon! there’s no need for such frivolity!” because A. not every budding mage has access to another more powerful mage and B. not every blind (or otherwise disabled) person/creature wants to not be, and it should not be thought that they all would.
“this is how you age when you’re unproblematic” NO! stop assigning moral weight to attractiveness! I am not hot because I’m a good person! I am hot because all of my friends are gorgeous! I’m absorbing their beauty! Like a vampire! Because I’m evil!
my buddy says the craziest stuff when i make him plead for his life
Every morning, I put on my thinking cap and my smartiepants. Unfortunately, there is no shirt that properly proclaims my intellectual abilities, so I have to go tits out
anyone wanna be my vile little minion?
it’s that bad out there huh
We saw you from across the bar and just wanted to say that we love your dark looming aura that saps the light from all it touches
But the spike pit adds so much personality to the living room☹️
a good character that ship and I just invented is woman who identities strongly as a BoyMom but the more she chats with the other boymoms the more it comes clear that she created her boy in a lab and is under the impression that this is the only way you can acquire a boy. it also slowly becomes clear that the guy she refers to as her "hubby" is some sort of igor and her She Shed is a horrifying laboratory. crucially she believes this is all normal and she is just as annoying about it as a regular boymom would be about her sheshed
I know plenty of women like this, it is important to allow them to congregate. lest the madness consume them
Thinking about 30-50 feral hogs again. Can you imagine the majesty. Murmurating like starlings. Elaborate emergent shapes. The deafening snuffling. They pass through a corn field leaving only rubble behind. And the danger! Don't get too close! It's electric. we have only begun to conceive of the hog
just watched a really drunk vampire try to bite into a capri sun
[I WAKE BOLT UPRIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT DEFLECT A CURSE WITH A TENNIS RACKET AND IMMEDIATELY FALL BACK ASLEEP]