Tired of Bis but I am a Bi

Supporter of LG solidarity and alliance Side Blog

[bisexual-biphobe]

Side blog to highlight homophobia (especially lesbophobia) and entitlement in the bisexual community.

Beliefs

I do not believe gays or lesbians are capable of being “biphobic.” The idea is on par with “reverse racism.” Bisexuals make up a majority of the LGB community, and our opposite sex attraction (OSA) gives us more privilege and safety than gays and lesbians

Bisexuals experience same sex attraction (SSA) differently than lesbians and gays, because we still experience OSA. We cannot understand exclusive same sex attraction, and we are incapable of comprehending lesbian or gay loneliness, especially that which is experienced by homosexuals in smaller, conservative towns.

“I fall in love with people not their gender/sex” is homophobic. Gay people love their partners for who they are, they are just incapable of attraction to the opposite sex. To describe bisexuality this way implies sexuality is capable of being changed, which it’s not.

L4L and G4G are not bigoted. It is understandable for marginalized people to want partners who better understand and empathize with their own lived experiences. B4B came about as a reactionary fit to the aforementioned partner preferences.

LG (without B) solidarity is NOT bigoted, and is a direct result of our community’s homophobia. Regardless, it is again understandable for two groups who experience exclusive same sex attraction to want to support each other and foster community with each other based on this.

Lesbians and Gay men do not owe us their time and beds simply because we also experience SSA. Homosexuals are not here to validate our sexuality, and feelings.

Lesbian cannot be attracted to MTFs and gay men cannot be attracted to FTMs. It is neo-conversion therapy rhetoric, and homosexuals are not here to validate your dysphoric anxieties.

[bisexual-biphobe]

“Well what if I hide my identity from you! What then?!”

If a lesbian sees a non-trans identifying femboy, mistakes him for a woman and loses attraction once finding out he’s a man? Normal given she’s a fucking homosexual. It doesn’t mean she’s attracted to males, it means she thought he was a woman.

Hiding your identity as some sort of gotcha to prove the “evil vagina fetishists” wrong is rape culture! Informed consent is the name of the game and y’all love deceiving people.

You think it’s appropriate to cause angst and distress in a marginalized demographic because of your male privilege. You feel entitled to it because of your male privilege.

Lesbians are innately not attracted to males. It’s not a fucking choice. How dare you fuckers act like your gender identity is innate while denying that female sexuality is also innate. Why could that be? Oh, because of your heterosexual/bisexual male entitlement.

[mousidy]

Sorry but I’m exclusively attracted to afab people. I wasn’t sent to conversion therapy twice as a teenager only to have people on the internet guilt me into trying to like people assigned male just like the Mormon counselors wanted. I will always advocate for trans rights but this kind of rhetoric will only hurt you. You cannot guilt or coerce people into sleeping with you or rather, you can, but you should’t.

I've been wanting to unpack this particular terf argument for a while but I'm not even sure what I wrote that you could be responding to here. yes it's bioessentialist to see trans women as our assigned sex before what we actually are, but that fact alone does not obligate you to sleep with anyone

it would be fatphobic to announce that you don't want to sleep with fat women, and someone simply calling that out alone would not constitute pressuring you to sleep with anyone you didn't want to

it's not carte blanche to announce all the minorities you don't want to sleep with and aren't attracted to

[mousidy]

also I promise you there are quite a lot of trans men who do not want to be told how attracted to their "afabness" you are. your obsession with people's government sex assignments is gross. spare us your essentialism and just don't fuck people you don't want to fuck it's that simple

[mousidy]

the fact that some trans men call themselves lesbians is not a blank check for you to reduce them all to their agabs. it's disgusting. stop

[butcherrypie]

This is even more fucking stupid because until someone tells you, *you don't know*

Nobody can be exclusively attracted to afab people because YOU DON'T KNOW. You can't, not for sure.

What actually happens is they're attracted to someone and then if they find out they're transfeminine they get that instant gut reaction of "Ew fuck a tranny". That's why it's not a preference, it's a manifestation of bigotry.

[tankie-transfeminist]

This is transfeminism!

[aftonfamilyvalues]

holy shit this is so fucking insane

[bisexual-biphobe]

Yeah, and once they tell you, the attraction goes away. It’s almost like knowing something that important about someone you’d like to get intimate with is informed consent.

It’s not bigotry. It’s sexual orientation. Bigotry would actually look like denying the existence of homosexuality because it doesn’t stroke your ego.

Lesbians can’t tell I’m bi from looking at me, but if they want to date only other lesbians, because we experience attraction differently, and I hide that information from them, they’d feel betrayed. They set a clear boundary and *I* would be violating for what? The sake of proving a point? How fucking gross.

“SEE SEE, YOU WERE INTERESTED IN ME FOR A SECOND SO WHY NOT GIVE ME A CHANCE???” That’s MANipulative behavior. Not taking no for an answer. Ignoring conversion therapy trauma and enforcing your own conversion therapy. Guilt tripping.

Neither of you rapist cretins should date ANYONE.

Also, sexual orientation isn’t a “preference.” That’s conversion therapy rhetoric you dumb fuck

[g1rluninterruptedd]

some of you OSA/het partnered radfems are lesbophobic and it’s truly disgusting to see. not all of you of course but some of you seem to get in your feelings whenever radfems who just so happen to be lesbians actually ask you to critique your own personal decisions as well and it’s disgusting.

i was scrolling through @never-tell-me-what-to-do ‘s blog and saw comradical’s weird ass apparently is just obsessed with defending her jakey and her sex life? why are some of you like that? why does your critical thinking stop at your jakey? and then you turn around and bring up us being lesbians like it’s something to be ashamed of or as if we don’t have eyes? 🤨 and it’s like some of you are basically just like “rules for thee, not for me” and it’s so dumb.

[never-tell-me-what-to-do]

not only did comradical post this disgusting ass fake lesbophobic statistics that only incels believe, but she was just sexist to all women too. i mean something about lesbians existing pisses her off bc it makes her acknowledge that she is dating her oppressor. i would delete my damn blog too if i said that "women are more abusive then men" or that "women are just lying about the pain their periods caused them bc i don't feel anything". she was talking about the girls who were on her team and accusing them of lying about period pain. She was willing to even push down her own community of osa women just to appease her porn addicted boyfriend. literally putting him before all. women like this dont have a community, they don't even uplift likeminded women. she started beefing with me and calling my art bad and performative and wishing that i got arrested for graffiti tagging a building belonging to a child rapist. women like this love to defend our oppressors

[waluigitheanti]

Are you okay with people being exclusively same sex attracted?

You mean being transphobic?

[afabist]

[positivityforlesbians]

You gals see how we’re called transphobes just for literally being homosexuals ? This is unacceptable. Catch me and other actual lesbians not giving a shit about your “terf” accusations and whatnot, you did that to yourselves homophobes.

[fake-wizard]

If this is how they want to define transphobia then fine, all gay people are transphobic - and transphobia is a completely useless concept with zero weight or significant meaning. If that’s how they define transphobia then fine - transphobia has nothing to do with oppression or violence anymore, it just means pouting about your sex life. How does this help trans people exactly, op?

[literally-black-jesus]

I hate people who say shit like "I prefer to date people with afab bodies" no you don't you prefer people with vulvas and boobs who look more "fem" to you and its perfectly fine to say that. I'm afab and I don't think you'd like my beard or body hair or anything about me so don't rope me in when we both know what you meant. SAY WHAT YOU MEAN I FUCKING BEG YOU

[evenlesssentimentaltranslator]

OK. She means she’s a lesbian and she wants heterosexual men to stop sexually harassing her.

[itdoobielikethat]

Im a woman with a beard and body hair, and my lesbian wife desires me. Why do you think lesbians are adverse to facial and body hair? They're not. Women with facial and body hair are just normal women, stop othering us.

[nansheonearth]

[tiktoksgay]

[flootzavut]

This is adorable holy shit

[the-land-of-women]

x

[batboyblog]

This Pride don’t forget your brothers and sisters fighting for their rights all over the world. 

[venusflytrappa]

STUD IS A BLACK LESBIAN TERM!!!! IF YOU ARE NOT BLACK YOU CANT BE A STUD PLEASE STOP IT PISSES ME OFF SO BAD 😭😭😭

[lqhr]

the amount of people in the notes that had no idea what the hell stud meant proves to me half of the loud mouths on this app know absolutely fuck all about lesbian history and only what benefits them

[radfae]

what i don’t understand about trans women needing to be included in lesbianism is that like… if males are going to be in my sexuality, then what am i attracted to if not sex? it’s not femininity, since butch lesbians have existed forever and reducing women down to spinny skirts is misogynistic in nature. you are… attracted to someone saying “i’m a woman”? you’re attracted to the pronouns she/her? i don’t understand. that is literally not how attraction works

[radfae]

almost 5 years on this post and i never really got an answer except for vague notions of ‘sexuality is complex, trans women are women’

[cannabutch]

there is a generation of young lesbian and gay kids who do not know it’s okay and natural to be attracted to members of your own sex. they are being put through online conversion therapy by queer hets telling them that if they aren’t open sexually to someone of the opposite sex they are bigots. that a metaphysical concept of gender id trumps the actual physical body. these queer hets will outgrow this phase, return to their normal heterosexual lives, and they will laugh about this as if it isn’t gonna leave behind a bunch of young traumatized homosexuals.

[hyeenagurrl]

if you call yourself a ‘butch transbian’ i am going to set your house on fireeeeeeeee

[merkredonn]

If you believe that lesbians can like dick, you're a predator.

[gaywill]

i should be allowed to kill people based on how they talk about lesbians

[diana-lostandfound]

If you are a bi woman, sure, you can date males. But realize that you are making a choice of your own free will to lavish your oppressor with love and affection. And it IS a choice: you also have it in you to love women. But you choose not to. As a male-partnered bi woman, you have quite literally chosen men over women. You are sending a message to the world that says: "I have love and respect and admiration and sensuality and affection that I could give to a woman. But I choose not to! I think this man here is more worthy."

Then you come here and have the gall to demand approval of your shitty choices from LESBIANS of all people. Shitting up a peaceful and productive radical feminist space by trying to get bisexual and lesbian women to infight with one another, about males of all things?! Sorry, but you are not heccin' kweer and empowered for letting a man masturbate with your body, and lesbians do not owe it to you to hold your hands and tell you as much. Get lost.

Also I'm just gonna say it. If you're dating a man, if you've only ever dated men, you do not experience "biphobia." Someone thinking you're straight because you only date dudes is not oppression.

[fematrix]

current social media discourse about lesbians sounds to me like

hey gurl✨, newsflash🌈: it's totally absolutely OKAY⭐ to be HETERO!!🧚‍♀️ you don't need to be gay🤹‍♀️ to be gay🧞‍♀️! isn't that neat🫦 and valid👀? now come on, send all your thoughts 🧠 and prayers 🙏 to everyone 🙆‍♀️ who likes👍 penis 💋💅