Clueless And Oblivious

Hi I'm Jess and welcome to hyperfocusing, barely any impulse control, gay shit, memes/shitposts, and depression. I’m gay and genderfluid! I also take commissions on embroidery and crochet things, so hit me up!

[joytri]

[jtownraindancer]

[jtownraindancer]

Had a minute at work to look it up, and I did find the title!

source

[followthebluebell]

#O Ancestors! I cry. What is your wisdom for times like these?#Start a garden and have a cuppa. says my great-grandmother who went through the depression#Lie your ass off to the government and have a cuppa. says my great-great grandfather who escaped the potato famine#Keep your humours in balance and have a cuppa. says my ancestor who survived the bubonic plague#Bring tribe together so many make strong and have cuppa. says my neanderthal ancestor#BITE THEM BITE THEM BITE THEM. Says my small arboreal ancestor. ALSO LITTLE TREAT.#Thank you for your wisdom ancestors. I say and turn on the kettle. - gallusrostromegalus

[loversdreamersandyou]

[certified-muppet-posts]

certified muppets post

[ladycreep-deactivated20201127]

[talkshows-deactivated20150818]

the anniversary of library paste man’s death is in four days.

[basketghost]

One hundred and ten years ago to the day. Amazing. Incredible.

[1dietcokeinacan]

RIP😔🙏📚🍯

[discover-underground-bands]

begging small indie musicians to post lyrics to their songs because with all the love in my heart 🫶i dont know what ur saying🫶 and no one else can tell me 🫶

[brenshor]

Read a fucking comic man

[justanapparatus]

kink at pride discourse is crazy if u see someone wearing a pup mask in 90 degree heat you shouldn't be worried about your comfort you should be worried about theirs... babe r u drinking enough water....

[justanapparatus]

so glad I didn't turn off reblogs because otherwise I would've missed this absolute gold

[ardri-na-bpiteog]

Double Income No Kids used to be seen as a kind of lavish lifestyle, now it’s like…a requirement to have any remote chance at financial stability

[ardri-na-bpiteog]

This post is getting notes again so I see we’re all handling the cost of living crisis well 🙃

[yekokataa]

[willaux]

i tracked down the reddit post because i wanted to see what the hell this guy was annotating like 30 pages in

i do NOT know french but i applaud this guy who seems to be attempting to decode the book as if the whole thing were cryptography

[pomegranate-cuties]

#he is absolutely trying to figure out the dimensions of the house#unhinged behavior but also somehow a completely valid way to read this shitass book

(via @willaux)

[notgreengardens]

[astraeus-moon]

@uncontrol-freak

[xeansicemane]

I feel like this is simultaneously the worst way to engage with this narrative and the closest to the intended experience.

Dude's out here trying to solve House of Leaves. I give it to page 120 before the actual minotaur gets him.

[boogerwookiesugarcookie]

he's adding an extra layer. he's reading this book better than any of us

[the-seelie-court-official]

bout to hit my bitch coworker with the 'do you treat everyone like this or only your gay coworkers?' because i know she'll bluescreen about it. and im gonna make sure to do it when no one else is around just like she does to me with her snide bitch-ass comments. i've literally never pulled the gay card before, but i talk about my wife often enough that everyone knows. I've also got a reputation for being very level-headed, straight-forward, and conflict-adverse. No One Will Believe Her.

[the-seelie-court-official]

my plans are measured in centuries, you amateur cunt

[the-seelie-court-official]

people are asking for updates. what the hell. anyway instead of saying it directly to the coworker i went to a respected colleague who has worked at this establishment for decades and asked her if she thought bitch coworker's behavior was targeted because i'm confused and wonder if she's Just Like That With Everyone and respected colleague is now ready to go mama bear mode, as i am the same age as respected coworker's daughter.

it might seem harsh but. she shouldn't have been mean to me three times

[the-seelie-court-official]

UPDATE

All three of the mean girls bullying me at work got fired. don't fuck with me.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Fairy: Hey I didn’t get your name.

Me: Yeah that was on purpose.

Fairy: Oh my god stealing people’s names has been categorized as a war crime for like a hundred years. Do I seem like the kind of fairy that would do war crimes?

Me: Well yes, but that’s just my impression of you personally. Not fairies in general.

Fairy: You’re smarter than I thought.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: So is the fairy monarch democratically elected?

Fairy: I think the one from a small corner of Alabama might be but for the most part, no. It’s still decided by a contest between the three oldest children.

Me: What kind of competition?

Fairy: Well it used to be to the death but that was too violent so these days each kingdom comes up with their own. In mine I think they play marbles but I’ve never seen one.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: Okay so why shouldn’t I say thank you or give gifts in return for favors?

Fairy: That’s mostly a regional thing but where I’m from it’s insulting to the wealth of the person giving you stuff. Like you really only thank people when what they did was like a huge burden so if you thank someone for giving you something that’s like calling them poor.

Me: Fairies have wealth inequality?

Fairy: I mean we technically still live under a feudal system if I’m being honest but with modern technology and ethics nobody notices.

Me: Do you have Internet down there?

Fairy: Only dial-up. That’s why I come to your house.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Fairy: So you’re telling me that human men don’t think that frog eyes are sexy?

Me: Well not most of them to my knowledge.

Fairy: So I bought these contacts for nothing.

Me: Hey man you don’t have to be a frog spirit to lure men into your clutches. Plenty of dudes are into cat eyes and ghoulish moaning.

Fairy: You really think so?

Me: I know so! Stop doubting yourself so much. You can definitely find some mortal men to lure into the timeless void for several centuries and adopt a demon cat with you.

Fairy: Thanks, man. That means a lot.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Fairy: So humans... don’t eat glass?

Me: No? It’ll cut up our insides and kill us.

Fairy: Ooohhhh. Oh no.

Me: What did you do now?

Fairy: More like... what I’ve done over the past three centuries since I moved out of my mom’s house.

Me: Did the coughing up of blood not cue you into anything?!?!!

Fairy: I thought that humans just spontaneously die sometimes!

Me: No we don’t! There’s physical reasons for these things!

Fairy: So... no more bringing nightshade and glass entrees to the potluck?

Me: No!

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: So why mushrooms as portals?

Fairies: Look man, even we don’t mess with mushrooms alright? Sometimes they open up a portal to the human world and it’s just best to not question it.

Me: So wait. You don’t make the fairy circles?

Fairy: No. Mushrooms decide.

[miyama-h-ff]

[slaughterhousefive]

I promise you guys have no idea where this video is going

[dragonboypaws]

Lobster, imprisoning me

All that I see, absolute crawdad

I am not shrimp

I cannot rice

Crab in my shell

Driving my CRUSTACEAN

[c0l0rsp1k3]

[roach-works]

the word 'swim' is doing a lot of heavy work here

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Not half as much as the audio is

[iwilleatyourenglish]

my partner is only 40 but nestled within him is the soul of an elderly man

[iwilleatyourenglish]

[mysdrymmumbles]

[chryza]

“You shouldn’t glorify violence in your stories” well I’m glorifying it. Sexualizing it even.

[chryza]

Apparently this was my most popular post in 2024 and I want everyone to know that if you wrote a fucknasty problematic story this year, I, personally, am very proud of you