Gamer Pressure
I love playing games. I love talking about games. I love listening to people talk about games. Games have helped me get through mental turmoil, provided some of my most memorable moments – they’ve been involved in my every waking moment since I was six. So, why does my favorite medium make me feel so damn pressured?
Is it my intense game backlog that spans years? Is it because I secretly don’t like genres or games which are (seemingly) universally loved? Or maybe, possibly, it’s the unrelenting pressure which assaults my soul if I am even slightly behind the gaming curve. Whether you missed news, or didn’t play Final Fantasy VII, to the general audience you will still be labeled through these four resounding, judicially absolute words, “You’re not a ‘gamer’”. There is an urgency to consume everything. If I am not ingesting to the degree of the defined “gamer”, then I do not love the medium I have devoted my life to as much as the guy/girl who played every game this year.
Oh, so I’ve been playing video games since kindergarten, but because I don’t enjoy platformers I am not a gamer? Fuck that.
There are rare moments in the gaming community when everyone is at peace. Players everywhere are constantly shitting on each other, anthemically shouting expletives to the tune of, “The Order 1886 was only six hours and $60, so you should hate it!” Meanwhile, the rest of us shrink into the shadows, harboring love for a gaming pariah like The Order without expressing it publicly because it’s not “cool” if you consider yourself a gamer. And that’s just if you’re a regular, every day gamer. Compound that feeling by 1,000 if you’re in the public eye, and another 1,000 if you’re a woman, person of color, or any minority group. The need to prove yourself is only more present, the definition of a gamer even more stringent.
Gaming began as a haven for social outcasts which, over time, has transformed into a contest where gamers clamor to prove themselves. In doing so, what was once an inclusive group – sheltering those who’ve been deemed weird or separate from mainstream society – is now annoyingly exclusive, shoving others aside because they only play AAA games, not indies; western RPGs, not JRPGs.
If you choose to invest yourself in gaming, the culture decides your level of passion for you. I have many friends who called themselves gamers, but have since settled into adulthood, a lifestyle not entirely compliant with gaming. However, are they not still gamers? What the fuck does it matter if they have time for maybe one or two games a year -- they still carry the same love they had when they were kids. Regardless of their love, according to gaming strata they receive the title of “casual gamer”. When did we have to start actively trying to convince others that we are as much a part of gaming as the guy/girl who played every AAA and indie this year? When did gaming turn into a competition?
It’s a contest that is destructive at best. With the development of YouTube and Twitch, gamers have become vicious in their competition. We’ve seen trolls come into prominence, internet toxicity evolve into new, dangerous forms, and a fresh breed of vile wholly devoted to being awful toward one another. People have been teased, subject to poorly written manifestos, and threatened purely because “your League of Legend strats are booty, bruh”. Not only are these individuals ridiculed, what was a relaxing hobby is now ruined by bullshit politics.
I love video games. Yes, the pressure of appeasing my peers is present, but I generally do not care. I cannot afford to care. If I allow myself to get wrapped up in the vitriol, I will eventually resent gaming as so many have before me. Even though I avoid the puddles of crap, it still sucks. It really sucks. The fact alone that I have to ignore specifics of a culture I have engrossed myself in is sad. Games were once the mecca players ran toward because they knew there would be a warm welcome. Now, when players arrive at the door that used to be so accepting, they have to know the password, fill out the application, and wait to be placed by an arbitrary hand into their proper category: hardcore, casual, or just for fun. You cannot simply play games, you have to be judged first.









