[endlich-allein]

Zeit — Rammstein, 2022 © Bryan Adams

[insomniac-arrest]

I don’t put my mental disorders in my bio since as I writer I believe in the principle of SHOW don’t TELL. And boy do I go on this site every day and show.

[nulltype]

remember that time that all the unova gym leaders gathered to take down team plasma with their pokemon and brycen opted for hand to hand combat instead

[ballistique]

I would too if my Pokémon was cryogonal

[sexysilverstrider]

‘fuck pokemon battles what are YOUR stats’

[thegaymertrainer]

👀

[screenshotsofdespair]

[kittensnax]

The Shell CEO has this lever on their desk at all times

[enki2]

[thyrell]

i love this post this guy really spent 15 years of his life telling his family he wanted a vacuum cleaner and for 15 years they were like no. i bet hes lying

[groupieculture]

i blog to lose followers

[rainbow-femme]

[evas-idiot-box]

Dear God please please please please please.

The captain, knowing they could pull the biggest prank on planet earth:

[fosszilisdinoszauruszhanyas]

[vitrified-vitriol-deactivated20]

Every reblog removes one HP from the queen

[maykitz]

gacha players when the new jpeg girl is revealed and she once again has an ass and titties:

[yekkes]

Literally

[sungodanthos]

Well obviously y’all don’t know the trash we have to deal with.

[yekkes]

Referring to sick people under your medical care as "trash" is really not a good look and uh. Literally proving the point of this video

[anxietyproblem]

[luffysfakebeard]

well I’d like to see you look better after having your balls stolen Tatsu

[depsidase]

[greenflamestherabbit]

My funniest ventriloquism story starts with the fact that I was obsessed with ventriloquism from a young age. I used to obsessively practice speaking without moving my lips, practicing the different tongue and air tricks and everything. Then I got sick with Bell’s Palsy, and it hit both sides of my face at the same time. Bell’s Palsy is like a headcold that hits your facial nerves. Anyway- This meant my entire face was paralyzed. I couldn’t speak using my lips. The doctor stared at me, dumbfounded that I was able to speak very fluently without my face moving at all.

[cantankerouscanuck]

[neofooturism]

the doctor

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[exigencelost]

Tired: Chess game with the grim reaper

Wired: this incredibly high stakes and doubtless riveting game of uno