[boundlessemperorvalkyrie]

Tag Directory

[peach-pot]

being anti-amatonormativity in a romance centered world is like watching half the people you know put all their eggs in one basket and then drop the basket and all their eggs break and they’re crying and swearing they’re never gonna do that again and then a month later they have all new eggs in a new basket and they tell you the problem was they didn’t have a strong enough basket or fresh enough eggs and then they drop the fucking basket again.

[peach-pot]

(this post is about putting all your time, energy, and care into one relationship, about staking all your happiness on a romantic relationship, effectively making the entirety of your joy and stability dependent on one person who could exit your life for any number of reasons no matter how great the relationship seems. it’s about the societal expectation to build your entire social life around one long term relationship, putting all your eggs in that basket, so to speak, instead of tending to larger social network and maintaining a variety of strong connections so that even if one very important relationship comes to an end, you won’t be losing your whole social life in one fell swoop.)

[midnight-sloth]

[23sanguinity]

why is it always oh she’s tough but has a secret feminine side why can’t she just be tough without any stereotypical girl interests when men are weak the validating character moment seems to come from other masculine guys seeing their worth/intelligence or whatever not them secretly also like working out in secret

And like yes I know the answer is probably because all of the depictions of strong women without a “feminine side” are negative but can’t popular culture move past needing that aspect to make a woman acceptable to us

[alicelawstan]

i want to turn on the tv turn on a random movie and it’s directed by a woman, it’s written by a woman, the lighting was done by a woman, the cinematographer was female, the score was written by a woman, the foley artists were women… i want to go see the orchestra and the conductor is female, the trombone section is all women, the cellists are women, the programme is music by women, the artistic director is a woman, the orchestra manager is a woman, the person who booked the venue is female, the double basses are women…

[vintage-bentley]

LGB people don’t need others to “affirm” our sexuality. We don’t need anyone to participate in our own understanding of ourselves. We don’t need surgeries, drugs, and other medical interventions to become our true selves. Quite the opposite: governments have used medical interventions to punish us for being our true selves. We don’t require that language be changed for us, other than simply expanding the definition of marriage—a legal definition—to include same sex relationships. We don’t try to convince ourselves and others that we’re anything other than how we were born. We don’t demand that taxpayers pay for anything related to our sexuality. This is all just off the top of my head…but there are so many differences between us and our goals, and the trans community and their goals.

[mecheina]

Chigüires o Capibaras (awwwwwww)

[jaguarys]

I find it fascinating (derogatory) how the general fandom conversation has shifted from "this woman is getting in the way of our gay ship and she's USELESS and ANNOYING and WE DON'T LIKE HER!" to this weird "no actually she's just not involved in her own relationships because she's too cool and special and awesome and a girlboss". But the problem is that there's not actually a veritable difference there. People still aren't engaging with her as a fully-fledged character. Like sure man calling her a girlboss is fine it's whatever but let that lead somewhere else. Engage with her. Can you actually name any of her character traits or are you just blindly praising her so that you can focus on shipping the guys in the background without feeling bad about it

[anomalys-bane]

STOP! 🛑🤚 Before you claim a woman on the internet is policing your/anyone else's behavior, please consider the following.

-> Does she control government entities around us that can legally enforce her ideology? Can she actually suppress opinions or reduce people's freedom of expression?

-> Does she control your social position? Can she alienate you from your existing group on a whim?

-> Do her views/actions actually mirror the popular, widely accepted one in the contexts you frequent? Or is she an outlier?

-> Are you a member of a majority that she cannot control or escape?

-> Does she control your internet access or what you can post? Can she force you to read and follow her ideology?

-> Can she physically remove or suppress the media you/your group enjoy? Can she stop the production of such media? Does she occupy a powerful position in group that affects the existence of such media?

-> Can she actually physically, legally force you to stop whatever you are doing?

-> Does her opinion or criticism carry enough weight to directly, materially affect your life and wellbeing?

Chances are this is not the case. And chances are you have no idea what policing actually is. dumbasses

[tenderstem]

but honestly I hope one day she can

[stillnaomi]

unless you want to teach small kids about a laundry list of sex acts, they're not going to even recognise many acts of CSA as sexual in nature. instead, we need to have children who are raised with an expectation of bodily autonomy and who feel comfortable complaining when they're made or asked to do things they don't feel comfortable with. we need children to have the expectation that those complaints will be taken seriously and that they'll receive backup to make sure situations like that don't continue. if their desires for bodily autonomy are consistently ignored, how can we expect them to speak out when something confusing and uncomfortable happens with their parent, cousin, or babysitter? we've already taught them that what they feel comfortable with doesn't matter

[ivyentombed]

exactly exactly exactly

when i was growing up, the number one thing that i was taught was that you do what you're told

the number two thing i was taught was never complain about having to do something you don't like because then you'll get something worse instead (i.e. physically beaten)

the number three thing i was taught was that "sex" was evil and that god was going to send the people who did it to hell

i never was taught what "sex" was, because "sex education" was also evil

i was never taught that hugs and kisses might have anything to do with "sex" (never mind possibly being an integral part of it), but i ~was~ taught that you were required to give and receive hugs from people who you didn't necessarily like

aaaaaand guess whaaaaaaat? i was grossly sexually exploited as a child ~completely without realizing it~ because i. was. a. child.

oh, and then when i became a teenager and learned what sex actually was, then i wanted to kill myself (spoilers: i didn't) because of the memories i was forced to recontextualize

now i'm a parent with my own kid and they don't know what sex is either, but you know what? i'm not concerned for them because they have been taught all their life that their feelings matter, and that their bodily autonomy matters, and that no means no, and that applies to kids and grown-ups just as equally

teach children bodily autonomy

the ~only~ reason not to do so is because you plan to exploit them

[noneedtofearorhope]

its friday. if you don't normally floss, today is a great day to make an exception, since it's flossing friday! get rid of some of the built up mats of bacteria between your teeth that brushing and mouthwash have a hard time to deal with on their own, help prevent them from setting up camp beneath your gums, where they can erode your bones and lead to teeth falling out if left untreated. help save yourself a future doctors visit!

[justangrymacaroni]

shaking women by their shoulders with all my strength, screaming YOU DONT NEED TO GET PERMISSION TO BREAK UP WITH SOMEONE!!!!

[justangrymacaroni]

you can choose to break up with someone for any reason. and it’s your choice. you’re allowed. you don’t need to ask for permission. you don’t even need to do it in person. you won’t get in trouble. in fact, most of the time you’ll be in trouble for fucking staying.

[justangrymacaroni]

they don’t even have to suck! you can just be tired! or bored! or want to be single! you don’t have to stay with a person you don’t want to be with because they “are such a good person and haven’t done anything wrong”!

WHY DO I KEEP TALKING TO WOMEN WHO ARE STUCK IN RELATIONSHIPS THEY DONT WANT TO BE IN

[justangrymacaroni]

with no-fault divorces currently on the fucking chopping block, we really need to start telling young women that they have autonomy when it comes to their romantic relationships.

no, you don’t have to date that guy just cuz he wants to date you.

no, you don’t have to stay with her because she doesn’t want to break up.

no, you don’t have to keep dating them even though they haven’t cheated/abused you/whatever horrible thing is your only reference for ending a relationship.

this is basic info, but you’d be surprised at how many women don’t understand this, or feel like it’s not true.

[justangrymacaroni]

and before ANYONE says that this goes for everyone, not just women, yes of course it does. anyone of any gender can suffer from this.

but let’s not deny that women are taught this shit from a young age. be virtuous, forgiving, kind, soft, turn the other cheek, it’s just cuz he’s a man and you’re a girl and you don’t understand. stay with him or you’re a bitch.

[pompomposting]

he is longing for the pudding

[shaffyreads]

Being an anti-intellectual towards media is so weird. Like, dude, you're really going to get mad at me because I'm showing respect to your favorite media by treating it like the art it is (for better or for worse)? I'm suggesting something you like might actually be culturally important? And you're...mad?

[mmeimono]

Thoughts that came to me when I was choosing his skin tone

[nebulations]

[ID: A Trigun Maximum comic. First, we see Vash blushing heavily as Meryl and Millie open the door to his room while he's shirtless. Vash has extensive scarring and metal implants; Meryl's jaw hangs open comically.

Later, the two are walking in the dessert, and Millie says, "Sempai… do you remember that night when we saw Mr. Vash in his room?" Meryl twitches, grimacing extremely hard, and says, "… Yes, what about it?" Millie, thinking back to Vash's blush, says, "I'm worried that he doesn't use sun protection... Do you think we should educate him about skin cancer?"

Meryl takes Millie by the shoulders and says, "Millie... he won't die of skin cancer," thinking with a frown about the scars showing where Vash has been stabbed, shot, cut, burned, and bitten. Millie goes, "Huh?" End ID]

[probuccalfat]

stop inventing shit to be insecure about oh my god

[probuccalfat]

like i’m actually so sick of it i’m two days from pulling my hair out and screaming in the walmart parking lot about how fake the constructs of our society are like you don’t have to do any of this shit you can have a fine and content life doing shit the way you want to do it oh my GOD you don’t need to have glass skin or have a 6 figure salary or try to find a house in the city or have a baby or try to get a promotion or whatever the hell else people told you makes for a happy life you can work at the library or pool forever if it makes you happy you can be single forever if it makes you happy have whatever the fuck kind of skin or hair or clothes you like having on your body have whatever the fuck kind of body you want this shit is MADE UP!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE ALLOWED TO BE HAPPY WITH WHAT YOU HAVE AND NOT CONTINUALLY STRIVE FOR MORE AND MORE!!!!!!!!!

[theoutlawbard]

[uncanny-tranny]

I think so many people are so deeply alienated from themselves that they have no clue how to exercise their free will and autonomy. For some, this alienation runs so deep that they are afraid of their own autonomy and humanity. It is completely understandable why one would have those feelings, but it can be worrisome.

I want to help others who feel this way, so here are small things I have done to exercise my free will:

Add "guilty pleasure" songs to playlists and actually listen to them (I have a ton of late 1990s-early 2000s music I listen to now proudly that I never listened to in the past out of shame)

Getting the décor item, bath set, bed spread, ect. in the patterns you like, even if it's "childish" (I got a dinosaur-themed wastebasket from the kids' décor section and I adore it)

Taking a new route to get to a place you go to often

Eat dessert first

Celebrate well, and often

Collect things that are "odd" or don't seem like an "acceptable" thing to collect (somebody on my "for you" page collects dandelion crayola crayons and it was so cool!!!!!!)

Incorporate one new piece in an outfit you wear frequently (e.g., a new chain, a necklace, ribbons, bracelets, ect.). Challenge yourself to add onto the outfits if you feel up for it.

Sing along to songs without worrying that you sound "good" or your intonation is completely accurate

Read a book from a genre you weren't allowed to read as a kid (comics, thrillers, mysteries, anything!)

Walk without having a specific destination or goal

Pick up a new craft without expecting yourself to master it or to ever be "good" enough. Get your hands messy.

I don't want to shame anybody for not feeling as though they have free will or that they are exempt from exercising it. However, I wanted to give ideas so that you might read this list and find your own ways to express your intrinsic autonomy and will. You deserve to be a person, to feel alive, not just living. That is what our lives are for.

[silvergryphonart]

And if you try something you never felt allowed to try before and find out you don’t like it, GREAT! You just learned something about your taste, and practiced saying both yes and no. You made your own decision.