and this little piggy went to the internet

[INSERT FUNNY AND CHARMING DESCRIPTION HERE]

[yo-its-matt]

Babygirl I’m popping joints that paleontologists don’t even know about

[yo-its-matt]

No, fuck. Chiropractors

[chippyyyz]

Yo mama so old her chiropractor is a paleontologist

[dingdongyouarewrong]

if you call someone ‘terminally online’ or ‘extremely online’ you are also extremely online because only terminally online people know and use those terms as insults in the first place. that doesn’t mean you’re wrong about the other person but you have no claim of superiority and offlineness over them. i am including myself here

[dingdongyouarewrong]

[foulserpent]

women arent allowed to compete in the tour de france and the womens races theyve had are like substantially shorter so that woman causing the largest crash in tour de france history by accidentally knocking a guy over with a sign is girlboss behavior and praxis

[pajamasecrets]

PLEASE JUST SHOW ME THE CASSEROLE RECIPE

[melrows]

For a split second my dumbass thought the Fukushima nuclear accident had fried the rice

[jayiray]

[jdididydog]

I hope this email sucks you off

[hotcommunist-deactivated2019032]

this is the funniest shit I have ever seen in my life….catholics are out here memeing better than I ever could

[thepoisonroom]

friendship is when you hear the stupidest most annoying thing you've experienced in your life then immediately share it with everyone like

[theweirdwideweb]

[callingallcars]

[bluegrasshole]

if this pandemic was happening in 2011 every mask would have a fake mustache printed on it or would be bacon-patterned and i for one think that is a silver lining

[ssimpledk]

[aceofsquiddles]

I was thinking about how ‘Grinch’ and ‘Scrooge’ are words for people who hate Christmas but aren’t exact synonyms and then this chart happened.

[tlirsgender]

You ever think about how crows are acting not unlike how early humans probably did and you’re just like. Oh ok

[tlirsgender]

I saw a Thing one time about how the earliest sign of civilization is a healed femur because that shows that we were taking care of each other because if we Didn’t a broken leg would mean you Die because you can’t. Do things

And I was thinking about this and I remembered also seeing an article about this one mated pair of crows where one of them broke its beak and thus couldn’t properly feed itself on its own. So the other one helps

So basically I have connected the two dots (“you didn’t connect shit”) I’ve connected them

And also they not only use tools but teach each other how to construct them, so uh

Really makes you think

[tlirsgender]

Realistically I know immortality would kinda suck but I’d love to see where crows are going with this

[theory-0f-everything]

[beyonceswhoadie-deactivated2020]

My last two braincells desperately trying to carry me through a month long depression

[devilishdescent]

HEY SCOOBY DOO WHAT THE FUCK

[bogleech]

the fact that “puss” was just slang for “face” at the time doesn’t even make it better because Shaggy still pointed right at Frankenstein’s wife standing right there and loudly called her not just ugly, but ugly enough to be humorous to him

[brucebocchi]

shaggy said booooo we hate your pussy

[roboco-san]

no smart appliances in this house. absolute fucking moron appliances only. my toaster is there to make bread hot not to tweet what time I ate breakfast or whatever the fuck

[roboco-san]

don't need my goddamn microwave to snitch to the nsa

[exilerose-deactivated20220711]

if i am somehow forced to own a smart appliance (likely due to lack of availability) i will figure out how to take the computer out and make it dumb

[roboco-san]

lobotomize your coffeemaker

[glumshoe]

imagine Bob Ross painting in the style of Hieronymus Bosch

“this little demon down here is kind of lonely, let’s give him some happy little friends. little demon party.”

[bienenkiste]

#Hieronymus Bob

[pleasedontsqueezetheshhh]

It’s your tortured human soul, you can choose how many blackbirds you want to fly out of his anus. Just as many as you think it needs.

[lagonegirl]

The artist 

it’s a powerful project

#MichaelBrown #BlackLivesMatter 

[youthincare]

[ image is photograph of a brick wall with two big posters. the first one is the new york times article with every line blacked out except “officer Darren Wilson fatally shot unarmed black teenager, Michael Brown.” and to the right is a large blow up poster of Michael Brown in a graduation photo. ]

[lagonegirl]

A Teenager With Promise

[pricantaz]

Powerful