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@cheshireteaparty
“I don’t remember recording this audio, but according to my voice memos it’s called “Very Goid Timtok idea ur welcome!!!” Please enjoy”
"Daily routine"
by @ haley.dyer on tiktok
Me: “I have read all my books. I’m constantly reading and re-reading them-”
My books:
why does the airport i go to have the fucking willy wonka tunnel in it i’m going insane
it is 6:09 in the morning and they expect me to walk through this and come out the other end mentally sound
do you ever think about how the series of events that lead to Dumbledore’s death in HBP was literally set into motion by Oliver Wood’s passion for Quidditch
okay but literally I can’t stop thinking about this -
it is of course possible that Draco would have gotten the Death Eaters into the school some other way if the Vanishing Cabinet hadn’t created the perfect opportunity, but it wasn’t looking likely.
so like, it’s reasonable enough to assume that Dumbledore’s death (at the hands of Snape specifically, obviously I know he was going to die soon enough from the curse, but the timing does make a difference so I’m still focused on this) occurred because of the Death Eaters getting into the school. the reason the Death Eaters were able to get into the school was because of the Vanishing Cabinet in the Room of Requirement, which Draco repaired.
the Vanishing Cabinet ended up in the Room of Requirement over the summer of 1996, presumably (reasoning for this is in the next paragraph), and Draco discovered it there sometime in his 6th year. but the only reason he had even known what it was, and what it could do, was because he had spoken with….
Graham Montague, a Slytherin who was in 7th year in 1995-1996 (when Harry & co were in 5th year). Montague was shoved into the Vanishing Cabinet in that year by Fred and George Weasley, because he was a part of the Inquisitorial Squad and was presumably about to take points from the Weasley twins for doing something disruptive. and we know that Montague got stuck in a limbo between the two connected cabinets, due to one of them being broken - he could hear things being discussed in Borgin & Burkes, which is how he was able to let Malfoy know that the other “end of the tunnel”, or basically the other cabinet, was in Borgin & Burkes (which, Draco would already have seen as a 12-year-old, in the summer before his 2nd year, when he visited the shop with his father - fun fact, Harry hid in that exact cabinet while Lucius Malfoy was transacting with Borgin).
Montague would never have had this experience at all if the cabinet hadn’t been broken in the first place. but in fact, we know exactly how, when, why, and by whom the cabinet was broken.
it was in the fall of 1992, when Nearly Headless Nick observed that Harry had gotten in trouble with Filch, and prompted Peeves to drop that very same cabinet from a large height in order to cause a distraction for Filch, allowing Harry to get out of trouble.
why was Harry in trouble in the first place? because he was “tracking mud” in the corridors.
why was he tracking mud in the corridors? because Oliver Wood had had him out on the Quidditch pitch all day even though it had been literally storming outside. so Harry came into the castle drenched and splattered with mud.
Dumbledore literally died because of how obsessed Oliver Wood was with winning the Quidditch Cup.
thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
sorry, one more thing - people keep reblogging this with tags that imply they think that this is like a “headcanon” or just “plausible” and while I get why you would think that, I need you to really understand how canonical this is because it’s Very canonical which is Ridiculous
to clarify:
the bits about the Vanishing Cabinet being the only real way he had to get the Death Eaters in, having heard about it from Montague and how that made him realize he could use them as a passage, etc - that was all clearly laid out in HBP, chapter 27 (The Lightning-Struck Tower).
Montague being shoved into the cabinet takes place in OOTP, chapter 28 (Snape’s Worst Memory).
Draco seeing the cabinet and Harry being in the cabinet is all in CoS, chapter 4 (At Flourish and Blotts).
and the entire situation with the Quidditch practice and the mud and Harry getting in trouble and Nick getting Peeves to drop the cabinet is in CoS, chapter 8 (The Deathday Party).
it’s the lined-up-dominoes meme, and it’s ridiculous. and it’s all on the page.
It’s better than that.
Voldemort died because Harry was the master of the Elder Wand that Voldemort was trying to use.
Why was Harry the master? Because he overpowered its previous master, Draco, and won its allegiance.
Why was Draco master of the Elder Wand? Because he disarmed Dumbledore in the precise sequence being discussed, which relied on the vanishing cabinet.
Harry defeated Voldemort because of Oliver Wood’s passion for quidditch.
Technically, Draco lead to Dumbledores death twice. Both by getting the death eaters into the castle but also because if it weren’t for him stealing Neville’s rememberall, Harry wouldnt have ended up on the team at all, and consequentially, getting mud through the corridors
this is exactly the kind of hyper specific meme that I am here for!!!!
Of course I knew all this but never EVER connected the dots.
TWO MONTHS LEFT OF THE 2010S HOW ARE WE FEELING
reblog if AAAAAAAAA
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啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 啊
AAAAAAAAAHHH!!!
This is such an abstract type of comedy I don’t even know how to handle it
people give twilight a lot of shit but its depiction of stupid teenaged boys is unparalleled
This speaks for itself and I love it
The cosplayer is @binary.nebula on Instagram! Go check them out!
bagel?
gender: addams
assigned goth at birth
If hating fat people is about hating an unhealthy lifestyle:
Why do fat people get harassed at the gym, while jogging, or while swimming?
Why are fat people expected to cover up more? Changing what they wear will not make them healthier.
Why are thin people allowed to get away with not exercising and with eating all the pizza and bacon they want? If the problem is the unhealthy lifestyle, why doesn’t that apply to everyone?
Never mind. I already know the answer.
Mm, it says here these are facts
I’ll repost time and time again. Y'all don’t give two fucks bout fat people’s health you just project your insecurities on to others and see that as you giving “helpful advice”. You’re not being helpful, you’re being hurtful. Leave fat people alone and practice minding your business
With some of this stuff it’s hard to tell if it’s ironic detachment or genuine racism, but at some point, what’s the f***king difference?
Wtf is this? Anyone else never heard or seen any of these “racist code words”? this made no sense… is this satire?
Sadly, no; I got called a “Skype promoting lies” last week for posting about how my congregation made support for Black Lives Matter an important component of our Rosh Hashanah services. And make no mistake—these white supremacists specifically chose “Skype” to be their word for Jews because of its linguistic similarity to “Kike.” The code words are a new but very real thing.
The fact that these scum sucking fuckers chose, of all the runes, Algiz…which stands for protection from harm…as one of the ones they specifically use…fills me with seething rage.
Get your white supremacy out of my futhark you fucking shitstains.
am reblogging because i am legitimately clueless and want to help other clueless individuals who might spot these symbols and now be able to recognize and report/flag them and block individuals who knowingly use them
FIRST THEY TOOK THE BUDDHIST SYMBOL OF PEACE AND NOW THEY’RE TAKING THE FUCKING TRIFORCE
I’m beyond angry right now ugh
My great grandparents didn’t sit through fucking internment camps in WWII for this
Male your kids aware that bad people are using these things! Google, Yahoo, Skype. There is no room for “They’re too young” or “I don’t want to scare them” because I can guarantee the other side doesn’t have those reservations about their kids
This is fucking terrifying
i’m obligated to accept friend requests from people i knew from high school because otherwise how else would i see shit like this posted in earnest
Where’s the little felt coffin to put their little felt baby in after none of these things cure them of little felt polio?
SILVER???????
oh no, oh man oh jeez, did you not yet hear how people are straight-up drinking liquid metal as the latest health craze??? I really wish I was joking but I think someone already killed or nearly killed their children by making them do it
Reasonable people: lemon juice, honey and hot water mixed together can soothe a sore throat :) Lavendar helps you sleep :) Steam helps unblock your sinuses when you have a cold :)
Antivaxxers: I’m going to ignore all science and common sense and make my child drink molten silver instead of getting vaccinated to Prevent The Autism™️
Teaching children of the inevitability of their own death can be the hardest thing of all, no reason you cant make it fun with felt.
So I googled this bc I’ve never heard of it and yeah, “colloidal silver” has been marketed for the last 25 years as a cure for things even as serious as FUCKING AIDS. “No, don’t take your HAART cocktail that’s shown to reduce viral loads to zero and thus make HIV incommunicable, that’s all big pharma quack, just drink this toxic material instead and I’m sure you’ll be fine” !!!!!!!
These people are really out here killing people with their pseudoscience.
This post is an amalgam of all the things people are currently suggesting I try for my multiple severe chronic illnesses, including, yes, breast milk and colloidal silver.
Colloidal silver will turn you BLUE.
Not joking.
Honestly, I genuinely thought this was supposed to be some sort of history thing. Like when your kid wants to pretend to be a doctor from 1705.