Just a "normal" crow in a "normal" jar

This is a wizard gimmick blog btw Just a crow in a jar. Nothing suspicious here at all. Just a normal nonmagic dumb crow. Stuck in a jar. This is a silly blog, in no way is it run by magic eldrich crow who is stuck in a jar. Noooooo, what made you say that? They/Them, Aroace

[icarianarts]

Do you think today's teens are asking their crushes out to prom via amazing digital circus themed poster boards like stuff saying Life Would Be An Amazing Digital Circus If You Went To Promni With Me...

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

the king has abruptly fired 60% of his wizard staff, so he’s about to be abruptly surprised at who floated 100% of his formerly floating sky castle

[hyper-lynx]

I heard they're planning to maintain their levitation rites with autonomous constructs from now on, saying wizards are going to be totally obsolete within the season... so, ah, I'd invest in falling island insurance.

[scilas]

Preserving not-prev-but-someone-elses funny tags in this chain as well because I love both these additions actually,

[3hkowalski]

The silly AI who ruined it all.

the wacky one

the oblivious one

the one who was left behind

[draconym]

Anyway I'm thinking about witches and wizards a lot because my house has been planning an Evil Wizard Movie Night series where we and our friends watch movies about evil wizards while dressed up as evil wizards. What kinds of snacks do you think evil wizards eat.

[evilwizard]

evil wizards eat green grapes. prepare two bowls: one frozen and one microwaved. then mix them together. you’ll be surprised!

[evil-looking-advisor]

Not that I condone the actions of evil wizards, my liege, but I would suggest perhaps some hummus and pita chips. You can't go wrong with hummus and pita chips.

[evilwizard]

not now evil advisor… im trying to trick people into microwaving grapes again

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Can’t remember if I turned off the gaping inter-dimensional portal before I left the house….

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Reminder: Ghouls, ghosts, and ‘geists are invasive species to our plane. They disturb the natural balance of our ecosystems and endanger the native species of this plane.

If you see one, squash one.

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

We're dispatching three severe weirdos to help you... you'll know them when you hear them

[flowergirlmiwa]

this unwise potion got me feeling unwise

[ode-on-a-grecian-butt]

[evilnonbinarywizard]

Can someone explain to me why in the fuck the Wizarding Council just banned "Summon Greater Xylophone?!" How on Earth was that spell being used such that it was bannable?

[monsterfucker-research-wizard]

It was overshadowing "Summon Grand Piano", and the creator of that spell has a lot of sway in the council.

[sunderwight]

The official reason is supposed to be that the spell is too open to modification mid-cast and can allow infernal influences through if done in an insecure plane or next to too many resonance objects, but that's true of like 99% of summoning spells, so yeah it's pretty much definitely the piano guy.

[sunderwight]

[movementnudge]

Movement nudge, chair edition!

X

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

If you read this, you failed your wisdom saving throw and got hit with Otto’s Irresistible Dance

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

There are NO wizards competing in the Olympics.

Humans are just some kinda freaks sometimes

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Plus we were banned for something completely unrelated

[geneticdriftwood]

honestly? abandoned/on indefinite hiatus/very slow to update fics, even and especially AUs and longfics, are often some of my absolute favorites. and people who refuse to read them are missing out!

for one, stories don’t have to be finished to be enjoyable and worth reading. but also? an unfinished fic is a whole little universe that just keeps on existing in my head! their world stays alive for me in a way that doesn’t always happen with fics I binge read and finish, and i love it. i don’t know how their story ends, so it just keeps going! and even when those stories DO update and finish years later, they’ve been in my head for so long that they stick around like old friends.

so to any author with unfinished works: thank you SO much for sharing what you had without waiting to finish it first. you’re just giving me the gift of getting to spend more time with your story and your idea. if you do update again someday, i’ll be delighted to jump back in! but if you don’t, just know a little piece of your world still lives on in a beloved tiny terrarium in my brain. i promise i’m taking good care of it :)

i don’t normally ask this, but if this resonates with you please reblog it, so it can reach the authors who need to hear it <3

[dailycatsblog]

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Once again the postmen have mixed up my magic tower’s address with my neighbor’s, I have received the wrong kind of magic wand and can get nothing done- while they, the lesbian polycule, are making do just fine I assume

[evilnonbinarywizard]

Can someone explain to me why in the fuck the Wizarding Council just banned "Summon Greater Xylophone?!" How on Earth was that spell being used such that it was bannable?

[monsterfucker-research-wizard]

It was overshadowing "Summon Grand Piano", and the creator of that spell has a lot of sway in the council.

[sunderwight]

The official reason is supposed to be that the spell is too open to modification mid-cast and can allow infernal influences through if done in an insecure plane or next to too many resonance objects, but that's true of like 99% of summoning spells, so yeah it's pretty much definitely the piano guy.

[sunderwight]

[gleerant]

if you ever find yourself thinking “wow I scraped the bottom of the barrel with my energy with that and came out okay!” that’s the devil talking. you did not come out okay. you borrowed energy from the future. you will repay it if you don’t rest and replenish the borrowed energy first.

[gleerant]

this one took off quickly - are you guys ok

[wizard-of-interesting-failure]

WIZARD PSA: Chronomancy might be weird and confusing, but one of the few solid rules of the discipline is keep your promises. Time is a library, and you don't want to meet the librarian.

[sensiblereblogifposts]

Reblog if you have met the librarian

[archdemoning]

[achillesinhighheels]

[john-boneman-lich-lord]

The court wizard acts all high and mighty because he works directly for the king but you know his ass is a nepo baby. His apprentices do all the work and the his "supervision" is only ever aimed at the Duchess' butt.