*Throws half martian Danny au w/ dead serious at you and runs*
*extra points if he's related to J'ohn, I'm not picky but please grandpa J'ohn if you will*
- ✒️
"What do you mean?" Danny cut in, cutting off Frostbite's words.
Clockwork looked up from the magazine he was reading. Danny knows because he kept glancing at him throughout the appointment, waiting for answers to the questions Frostbite asked. It's not that Danny didn't know what to say; it just felt like whenever he had a medical appointment, all knowledge of his own body vanished from his mind.
It happened a lot whenever his mom went with him to the human doctor, too. Clockwork wasn't like his mom, who was more than happy to answer for him. The time being, just waved a hand at Danny dismissively when Frostbite started with "so what brings you in today?" and pulled out a magazine, doing a cover-story exclusive with Speed Force on the topic: The shocking truth of time-altering with mortals. Clockwork had been looking forward to this issue for weeks.
He hadn't resurface from between the pages as Danny waited in silence before he realized Clockwork was expecting Danny to speak. He fumbled at first, but over the course of the appointment, he relaxed enough to give proper answers instead of hesitant, almost doubtful one-word replies.
This was just to establish Frostbite as his main provider as his Ghost Doctor, though Frostbite preferred to be called a Healer, and everything was going well. They drew some ectoplasm a few days before his actual appointment to run some tests, and everything looked good.
Until Frostbite was reading the results towards the end of thier appointment, and the yeti started discussing his genetics.
"What do you mean?" Danny repeats, blinking owlishly as Frostbite flips to the last page on his clipboard. "I'm fully human-er as human as a Halfa can be."
"Well, there is no question about your living and dead stage, but according to our lab results, you are not only human," Frostbite explained, handing over the clipboard to Danny. There are a lot of words and numbers that he doesn't understand, mostly because Danny was pretty sure he was fighting a persistent ghost that entire unit in biology and missed most of the lessons. He did, however, understand the conclusion part.
Half Earthling. Half Martian.
Martian.
Frostbite thought he was part Martian.
"This is wrong," Danny tells the yeti. He starts swinging his legs from where they dangled over the edge of the examination table. The paper that was laid over the padding wrinkled loudly with his movement, belying how nervous he was. "I'm not adopted, and both my parents are full humans."
"Perhaps your parents aren't aware they are martian." Frostbite offers gently. He places one large paw on his shoulder, gently squeezing Danny as if to offer him strength. "Or despite you not being one of theirs by blood, they always saw you as thier son and saw no reason-"
"Oh, this was due to your accident in the Fenton Portal. Your DNA was spliced with the floating Martian DNA, as that was during the Martian mass extinction. Since there was so much death at once, it was slower changing into ectoplasm and was stuck between worlds when you punched a hole between the Realms and the mortal plane," Clockwork explained, reading over Danny's shoulder in his child form. He twirls his staff at his side, as if he is preparing to lead a marching band, before he swings it towards a wall.
In an instant, a large pocket watch zaps into existence. It flips open, its arms twirling rapidly, until the watch's face vanishes and an image of Danny's accident appears. He watches himself carefully slip on the hamate suit and take a few steps into the portal. Sam and Tucker were in the right corner of the scene, exactly as he remembered it, even the detail of Sam holding her camera ready to snap a picture of the dare that forever changed his life.
He even sees himself accidentally pressing the button that turned on the machine- a fault in the design by his father, no doubt- and as he is screaming while his body is electrocuted, the camera zooms into him. Suddenly, they see his DNA floating in place until a mush of green goo wraps itself around the strands, shifting them until the goo becomes part of the genetic makeup.
Danny's jaw dropped even as Frostbite let out a hum of intrigue.
"Fascinating. This type of genetic editing has never been seen before. It's seamless, with no trace of anyone making alterations." The yeti points to a few parts of his DNA, where the added green rests comfortably. "I can even see how the Martian part enhanced your basic three."
"Basic three?" Danny repeats in a daze.
"Intangibility, Invisability and flight," Frostbite explains, waving one large claw towards a poster on the other side of the room. On it is information about the Basic Three, along with drawn examples, facts, and cautionary symptoms that something may be wrong if a ghost experiences them while performing the Basic Three.
"Every aspiration can do these three, but usually they can't do two of them at the same time, much less three, unlike you. There are a few exceptions, but they can only do it for a little while before exhaustion forces them to stop. Flight is the most common and the least energy-wasting, but every ghost has a preferred ability they call upon. Think of it like this: every human has the ability to sing, but not the skill to be a good singer. You are a triple threat, so to speak. I always assumed it was because you are still alive, and thus power your abilities with living energy instead of pure ectoplasm, but it seems it's because of your martian dna."
Danny's head is spinning. "So what you're saying is, my ghost powers aren't strong because I'm a Halfa, but because I'm part martian?"
"Not exactly." Clockwork cuts in again, now as an old man. He points one trembling finger towards the chart in Danny's slack hold. "Your basic three are boosted, but everything else? That's because you're a Halfa. And by the looks of it, you didn't get too much from your third parent-"
"Third parent!?" Danny yips, springs up from the table. He starts pacing in place, forcing Frostbite to scramble towards the room's final wall to avoid colliding with him. This places him in the perfect place to catch the clipboard that goes flying out of Danny's hold as the boy starts waving his arms around like a manic. "I have three parents!?"
"Biologically speaking, yes." Frostbite flips through a few pages, eyes moving rapidly along the report. "You're what is scientifically known as a Core Chimera."
"Core chimera?"
"It's someone whose biological parents are more than two people, usually caused by the cores expanding and pulsing during a mating, especially when-"
Danny holds up a hand. "Stop, I don't want to know how a Core Chimera is made."
"Why? It's perfectly natural."
"He's at a special age," Clockworks chuckles, now a middle-aged man. It makes him fold his arms and smirk at Danny, far more embarrassing than it needs to be. "Anything to do with mating makes him burst into giggles or makes him so embarrassed he has to curl up into a ball for a few minutes."
Frostbite smiles, shaking his horns fondly. "Youth."
"Indeed."
"Can we, please, focus on the matter at hand?" Danny grumbles, checks aflame. "So I have a third biological parent-"
"A father"
"Right, a second biological dad who I accidentally made into my biological dad when I was half killed between the living world and the dead world. This second dad is a Martian from Mars who, during a mass extinction on his planet, had his Martian DNA boost my basic ghost abilities, but nothing else that makes Phantom into such a powerhouse. "
Frostbite hums, clicking his tongue a bit as he flips through the last pages of the lab reports. "Yes. That's a good summary. The only other noteworthy thing I see here is the concerning amount of sugar in your diet. Does your family have a history of diabetes?"
"I normally answer no, but apparently there is a third option that might be yes. I can't ask him, though, because he's dead!" Danny snaps, pacing more aggressively now. "Is there something else I should know about this third parent?!"
"He's not dead." Clockwork twirls his staff again, like he was about to throw it into the air for a showy catch. He floats over the examination table, just slightly before the pocket watch, still displaying Danny's altered DNA. "He only nearly died. Well, legally speaking, he was dead for maybe four minutes before his wife managed to resuscitate him. They attempted to escape the planet together, but she succumbed to her own injuries just as they were entering Earth's atmosphere-"
"He's on Earth!?" Danny pounced on that workding like a lion on a wounded gizelle. "I can find him!?"
"He's on a Earth...." Clockworks starts hesitantly, his face melting into a child. It makes the time lord's uncertainty a little more poignant, and the urge to find his other father rises up a notch or two. Danny gives the floating child a stern frown, which only causes the great Clockwork to raise his hackles. "There is more than one Earth. There are multiple realities, infinite timelines, worlds far beyond-"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know about the other dimensions. I visited a few." Danny cuts in, crossing his arms. "The real question is, are you going to help me met my other dad on this other Earth?"
"It's not recommended.....this Earth is out of my jurisdiction." Clockwork began, but Frostbite raised a hand, waiting to be called on. There was a weird dynamic between the two. Clockwork acted like the yeti was a normal healer who would be treating his self-proclaimed ward, while Frostbite saw the always changing time lord as an all-powerful ancient that needed complete respect or bad things would befall his people. Almost like a living (sort of speak) god.
It was odd because Danny once saw Clockwork try to eat cereal with his foot and ended up in feudal Japan when he lost his balance and fell through his time portals.
"If the timeline is outside your jurisdiction, could you not petition a visitor's pass under the Youth Protection Truce? I could write a healer's note stating that Danny must seek out his other father for biological-related worries." Frostbite offers. His head is dipped, as if he were unworthy of speaking directly to Clockwork. This means he misses the way Clockwork's jaw slacks, likely never thought of the option. He often forgets that Clockwork only seems all-knowing because he can peek into the living world's flow of time, witnessing everything that was, is, and will be.
That did not mean he could peek into the flow of time for the dead world. There he was, just as helpless to time as any other ghost was, but he at least had monitors that played everything in the living world that he watched endlessly.
It was so hard not to see Clockwork as a disaster shut in after living with him for the summer. His parents thought he was at space camp when, in reality, he was watching Clockwork smack himself with his own staff and trip over air. While floating in said air.
"I could....." Clockwork starts, his ghost glow brightening up with glee, "I could meet Speed Force."
Danny knows that Clockwork had some kind of celebrity crush on Speed Force, since the being was the current most famous time ghost and was all the rage with time-inclined individuals in the Realms. "Yeah, and I could meet my other father-"
"Shush, Danny. I have to draft a letter. A petition for traveling to Speed Force's timeline." Clockwork gushes while snapping his fingers, causing a quill and parchment to appear from thin air. "Do you think he'll let me shake his hand?"
"Clockwork, I'm having a crisis."
"Danny, I'm having a moment." Clockwork dips his quill into the ink. The sound of the tip scratching against the parchment is nearly drowned by the time lord's words, "Don't ruin this for me, or I'm going to make you look stupid in front of Damian. He'll always think of you as the Hotdog Cart guy and not in a good way."
Used to his guardian randomly using references from his future, Danny rolls his eyes. He mentally slots the name away, assuming this Damian is going to be someone that Danny wants to impress as he turns to Frostbite. "What biological-related worries do you mean?"
"Nothing too serious, but if you are part martian, there is a chance that you may have some biological aspects that you may be unaware of. For example, I heard that Martians are weak to fire and can't even stand near it, which could explain why you developed an ice core. Now this is just a rumor, but if fire can cause such a reaction in living beings, I fear being around a flame, even something as harmless as a campfire, it may cause your core to melt." Frostbite shakes his head at Danny's horrified round eyes. "I am exaggerating, of course, but it's a good enough excuse to have you enter the other timeline, no?"
"Yeah, okay. I say we do this." Danny sighs. "I want to meet my other Father. What's his name?"
Clockwork glances up from his letter, his red eyes sparkling. "J'onn J'onzz. He believes he is the last of his kind, but a few survivors managed to hide on Mars, including his sister and her children. We can say you were born during J'onn's grief-driven binge of alcohol and human women that he drowned himself in when he first got to Earth. You were a normal boy in the foster system who wanted to send a message to Mars for a science project, and one of your "cousins" picked up the signal, starting a penpal system that eventually led to a conversation about biological differences, making you think you might be a Martian yourself. I'll ask Speed Force to make the proper paper trails and make our lie solid enough that no one will know it's false."
"Why do we need to lie about that?"
"That world is not ready to learn about different timelines. Not yet." Clockwork waves a hand. "It plays a big part in your love story with Damian."
"Who the hell is Damian!?"
"Watch your tone. You don't want to lose him. He's rich."
Frostbite looks between the two nervously as Danny throws his hands into the air with a huff. "Does he often speak of the future?"
"All the time. He thinks spoilers are funny when they really ruin all the excitement!"
Clockwork's eyes gleam. "Oh, there will be excitement, alright. And a lot of innocent hot dogs will forever be ruined."
"What does that mean?"
"It means we need to pay for this healer visit, then stop by the Truce center to get our visitors' passes processed. We're going on a life-changing adventure, baby!" Clockwork cheered, shifting into a teenager- he rarely used this form, but when he did, Danny knew he was going to have to work as the voice of reason for an annoying amount of time. "We're going to pose as runaway orphans on a quest for you to find your dad and for me to shake the hand of the most attractive time lord! Frostbite!"
The Yeti startles at the use of his name, twisting into a deep bow before Clockwork. "Yes, my lord?"
"Do you accept credit?"
"I do."
"Excellent, for I have forgotten my wallet." Clockwork reaches inside his chest, pulling out a plastic card and waving it around. "This is why we have the emergency credit card!"
Danny put his head into his hand. "This is going to be a long summer."
Au where Jason Todd is sacrificed to the King of the Infinite Realms and, upon realizing Danny isnt actually interested in human sacrifice nonsense, immediately shoots his shot
Like this man has been reading romance novels for as long as he can remember and he absolutely refuses to let this set up go to waste. He has a strange new world, a kind but powerful king, a castle, and big ass fucking library right there.
Too bad his family didn’t get the memo and reverse summoned him back too early.
———
Jason: *finally seduced Danny and is about to initiate the “frantic sex after weeks of pining” portion of the plot*
Jason: *is summoned back*
Jason: *has hickies all over his neck, claw marks down his back, unzipped pants, and no belt*
Jason: …
Jason: I hate all of you, you cockblocking motherfuckers. I had him right there! I could have been his husband. HUSBAND!!!!!
Bruce:
Tim:
Dick: …looks like you’ve been having a better few weeks than we have.
Damian: Father, I believe this is sufficient proof for removing Todd from the family.
Jason: IF YOU FUCKING WAITED I COULD HAVE HAD A DIFFERENT ONE
Tim: sorry that we worried about you being at the mercy of an all powerful ruler of the dead???
Jason: *sighs with heart eyes* god I fucking wish. His eyes are so pretty when he’s angry 💕
Ok, but then when Jason has a moment to calm down, he realizes this is just further plot development
Sure, he didn't really want a speration/reverse kidnapping arc, but hey, reunions are some of his favourite moments.
Cue him just hamming it up because he wants his future husband to sweep him away. No, he's not exaggerating Dick, Danny could and would pick him up and carry him off! He has a whole manor to work with, let him live his dramatic love interest dreams. Plus getting on thier nerves is great payback.
Bruce: Jason please stop sneaking around to try and sacrifice yourself again in the manor.
Jason: And let you keep me here, away from my beloved?! Never!
Bruce: We're trying to make contact again -
Jason: Every moment that passes is a moment too long to be separated from my love.
Danny: *accidentally shreds chain mail with his bare hands after seeing Jason’s sweater fall wayyyy down his shoulder showing a fucking lingerie bralette*
Another thought: Jason fantasizing about danny just ripping the corset off and fucking him over a desk (preferably the one in his office) but actually losing his mind when Danny carries him to bed and carefully loosens the laces + unclasps the front of his corset like he’s opening the most precious gift he could have ever been given
And Danny standing him in front of a full length mirror so not only is Jason seeing Danny look at him like he’s all he’s ever wanted but also at himself who looks seconds away from begging for it
I’m gonna scream, this is sending me into the stratosphere; I love it so much. Oh my stars.
Jason is just so ready to live out every fantasy he’s had and trope he’s ever loved; and Danny is either entirely willing or blowing his expectations out of the water.
Picture this:
Jason wanting an impassioned argument in the rain right before the climactic moment of a confession forced past one of their lips from the tension of the moment snapping. Only for Danny’s powers to react to him thinking he’s upset Jason so horribly by making it snow and that leads to Jason shivering.
Danny says something like “No matter how upset with me you are, I can’t see you shivering like this. Please come back inside with me Jason, after I know you’re alright I can leave you in the care of the staff. Please don’t stay out here because I upset you and end up sick, please.”
As soon as Jason agrees to return inside, Danny picks him up in a bridal carry effortlessly (if not for being swept off his feet Jason would’ve swooned). He carries Jason into his room and sets him down in front of the fireplace. He instructs Jason to strip (his clothes are wet and Danny is a himbo that doesn’t realize how it sounds) and once he does he takes the blanket from his own bed and wraps it around Jason.
Jason standing in the king’s chambers having been told to strip; is now wrapped in a blanket that smells like the aforementioned king. Jason is internally falling more in love with the king, changing some of his plans with this development, and cursing the king for not kissing him when he wrapped him in the blanket.
Now imagine all of that being last week, after all that it took several more days before finally the tension snapped. And then, right when it was getting to the best part. He was dragged back to this fucking place without the wonderful King that was in the middle of giving him a dozen hickies.
“It's not fair.” The little ghost kicks impotently at the chalk lines around her feet. “I ain't done nothing.”
I nod, setting down my chalk and spellbook. “It does sound like there might have been a bit of a misunderstanding.”
“She took against me, that's what happened,” the dead girl says with a scowl. She looks about fourteen, round faced and spotty, with whisps of brown hair peaking out from under her mob-cap. Her face and her crossed arms have a tell-tale bluish tinge to them. A cholera death.
“I been here for don't know how long and never gave any trouble. Nobody ever complained about me 'till her.”
…well, that's not strictly true.
Number 12, Barclay Street has been attracting rumours of haunting since the mid nineteenth century.
Sounds of faint singing and crying in the corridors at night. Cold spots. Doors that open and close by themselves. Animals acting strangely. Harmless, mid to low-level stuff, typical for a bored teenage poltergeist.
Still, pointing that out isn't likely to achieve much, and certainly the most recent complaints of blood running down the walls, screams in the dark and paralysing night terrors seem distinctly out of character.
The ghost toes the chalk again, more tentatively this time. It stays resolutely unbroken.
She could get out if she wanted to. I'm not one of those assholes who brings out their full arsenal of wards and sigils for a first meeting with a level 2 spectre. The summoning circle will keep her in one place for as long as I need her to talk, but it wouldn't hold for a moment if she really fought against it.
I take it as a good sign that she's still here. Pouting or not, she's clearly willing to work with me.
“None of the others could do this,” she says. “None of 'em even saw me.” She looks up. “Are you here to exise me?”
“Exorcise,” I say instinctively, and curse myself when she flinches. “Sorry, no, no! I don't exorcise people from their homes without good reason, not if they're happy where they are.”
“I was happy. Till she started calling in all them ghost hunters.”
Mrs Delaney had been quite persistent in her attempts to 'fix' her haunted house. Most of the people she found were charlatans, of course, but I'd still arranged an appointment as fast as I could once word reached me. It wouldn't have been long before she happened upon somebody with Talent, and unfortunately not everybody in this field knows how to behave like a professional.
“I think we might be able to help each other,” I say, careful to keep my voice calm and level.
“Don't see how. Not unless you can exorcise Her.”
“Not quite what I had in mind.” I pull out my phone and scroll through my photos. “You say that you're not the cause of the most recent incidents of paranormal activity?”
A pause. The ghost gnaws on her lip. I wait, patiently, keeping my body language open and nonthreatening. “I… I knocked her coffee cup over,” she admits at last. “She was being mean and talking on her telephone, saying I done all these things when I never did! So I decided to show her what I could do if I wanted.”
“Hmm.” The ghost eyes me nervously, as if expecting me to pull out a book, bell and candle and banish her on the spot.
“I only tipped it,” she adds. “I didn't break it or nothing!”
“You shouldn't have touched it at all,” I say sternly. “But… I can appreciate that you were frustrated, so let's say no more about it.”
The ghost looks relieved.
“My point is,” I continue, “if you weren't the one making blood rain from the ceiling or tormenting people in their sleep, then what was? There's no other ghosts on the property.” I find the picture I was looking for. “You can get anywhere around the house, right? Including behind the furniture and in the backs of cupboards?”
“Yes'm.”
I hold the phone up so that she can see the picture on the screen. “I'm going to let you go free in a moment, and I need you to see if you can find anything that looks like this.”
The ghost wrinkles her forehead. “What's that when it's at home?”
“Black mould,” I say, reaching out a foot to break the binding circle. “And I'm pretty sure it's the cause of this haunting.”
“Why didn’t Dick and Cassie Sandsmark believe Tim about Bruce being alive?”
He didn’t actually give them any evidence for it before running away. Didn’t even try to convince them beyond saying “he’s alive, I’ll prove it.”
He’d spent the past year trying to resurrect his dead family and friends. After 100+ cloning attempts and almost stealing Lazarus pit water, this just looks like Tim’s typical grieving pattern.
Dick, Tim, and Clark personally examined Bruce’s dead body and determined it was his!
Tim’s inner monologue in Red Robin 1 shows even he knows he’s driven by desperate hope and compounded grief: “He’s all I have and he has to be alive…Please, god, don’t let me be crazy.”
If Tim had turned out to be wrong I honestly believe he still would’ve gone looking for a way to bring Bruce back. Just like he did with Kon, Bart, Steph, Jack, and Janet.
Red Robin follows so clearly from Tim’s grief from losing Jack Drake and everyone else. DCU Halloween Special ‘09: “Our Father’s Sins” made this even more obvious by showing Red Robin Tim reflecting on his grief over Jack while he’s searching for Bruce.
Of course his friends and family think he’s grieving! He is! He just also happens to be right. Nobody is completely unjustified here.
I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.
I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.
It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!
It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.
PITCH: We call it Moon Day, and then every 7 years when it falls on a Monday, that's an even BIGGER deal and we call that Moon Day Monday and go absolutely apeshit about it (the next Moon Day Monday is in 2026 so we have a couple trial runs first)
Wes: A problem? On top of us being stranded in a different world at the wrong age and homeless, type of problem?
Jazz: Danny, Dan and Dani were kidnapped
Wes: What? By who?
Jazz: Some orphanage that I'm pretty sure shouldn't be open in this day and age. They've been gathering kids with black hair and blue eyes!
Wes: They still have orphanages? Weren't those closed in the 50s?
Jazz: They were slowly phased out, and by the 80s they weren't around, but now is not the time for history!
Wes: It's always important to know history. How will we ever learn from-
Jazz: They're trying to sell them to some rich guy who looks for kids who have thier characteristics! They call them Wayne Adobition Bait!
Wes: Wayne? Who is that?
Jazz: I don't know! Apparently, the man likes kids with black hair and blue eyes. And the orphanage needs money, so they're hoping Wayne pays top dollar for them!
Wes: Jazz. Relax. Even if the man does buy them, we're talking about three Halfas. Wayne is the one in danger, not the Halfas.
Jazz: Yeah but the Halfas are all under the age of ten! They can't defend themselves!
Wes: I mean, yeah, Dan is in the body of a ten-year-old; Danny is nine, and Dani-with-a-I is the sassiest six-year-old I've have ever seen but don't forget they are all mentally much older. You went from nineteen to twelve and you still have your grown mind.
Jazz: Not really! My emotions are all over the place- I'm losing to my kid biology! My brain literally undeveloped!
Wes: Mine did too
Jazz: Oh yeah, you're also twelve now. How are you handling things so well? Hasn't it taken a toll on you?
Wes: I've always been like this
Jazz: .....That's... concerning, but we have to handle the evil orphanage first; then we can talk about your mental state.
Wes: I wasn't aware my mental state was bad. What's wrong with my mental state?
Jazz: Exactly! We will rescue the Dannies!
Wes: Answer the question Jazz.
Jazz: That's a great idea! We should try to get to Wayne first, make him adopt us, and escape with the Dannies when they offer them. If he doesn't go for us, we can dye our hair! Let's do this!
Wes: I really don't want to. I shouldn't have even been thrown through the portal with you guys. I just happened to be the waiter at your table when the ghost attacked. I'm not part of the team.
Yeen Fact #798:
"Spotted hyenas leave a track that's easy to spot: four blunt-clawed toes and a wide, triangular heel pad, with the claw marks always showing. The front paw print is larger to carry that big head around, while the rear print is a bit smaller and neater."
This has been another fun Hyena Fact.
So I do 3D modeling and printing as a hobby, and a few weeks ago I designed wheel guards meant to prevent office chairs from running over cables and clothes... or your pet's tail.
I got the idea from cowcatchers old locomotives used to have.
Anyways, yesterday I uploaded the model to Thingiverse, and just hours after uploading it, the Community Relationship Manager of the whole website left a comment suggesting I enter the model into a competition that's currently being held on the site.
So I did... and now it's in third place not even a day later. First place is $500, but the competition still has a month to go.
Then the Community Manager contacted me again, telling me they want to feature my model in an upcoming design promotion.
Just, what is happening? I mostly made this thing for myself in, like, an hour, and now it's suddenly super popular? This is all a little bit overwhelming 😵💫
Other models I worked on for weeks didn't get nearly as popular. I swear, it's impossible to predict what people will like.
Anyways, if you want to print the wheel guards yourself, you can get the model here or here.
I also made a quiet version you can stick furniture felt pads on.
First humans ever to leave the solar system suddenly drop out of communications and the ship can't be found with any equipment. After one month of no contact their home countries start reluctantly holding funerals for the space heroes only for them all to turn up, healthy, well fed and extremely disoriented, in the middle of Tokyo, talking about alien abduction. Turns out that aliens found the poor humans straying out of their solar system, presumably lost, and took them to Alien Wildlife Rehabilitation before dumping them back in the middle of their native habitat.
I’ll bet they have cool new tattoos that turn out to be tracking devices too. Just in case these spirited individuals try to make another break for it.
As much as we are New York exceptionalists, the struggle that New Yorkers are facing here is not a distinct one. It’s a struggle to afford rent, child care, groceries, public transportation. That’s a struggle working people are facing across the country and frankly across the world.
And for a long time, especially here, the idea that democratic socialists could have answers to these struggles and a vision that could go beyond recognizing them and actually resolving them was treated as if it was an intellectual premise. And what we’ve shown over the last six months is this is what it looks like if you operate with democratic socialist principles. You put the city on a path to universal child care. You speed up the slowest buses in the country.
I think what people are looking for is a politics that is relevant to their day-to-day life, and too often it feels as if those on the center-left are simply explaining why things are this way, as opposed to answering how we can make them better.
I know Mamdani is funny and he's good on social media and he's also young and cute which doesn't hurt but I think the fundamental issue is he sounds like a sane human being who means what he says, which is a normal experience anywhere but in politics where it's absolutely shocking.
and I think to beat him you can't call him a raving lunatic, like obviously people do and some people even believe that, but realistically you have to out-sane him with sensible policy proposals that aren't coming from someone who would be cast as the villain in a children's movie.
I think whenever we talk about the importance of increasing taxes on the wealthiest in order for everyone to have a chance at affording life in the city, you will hear the idea of capital flight. And what we’ve seen time and again is a lot of the fear-mongering is not actually borne out.
I think, similarly, when we’re talking about a proposal to tax the secondary homes of nonresident New Yorkers that are worth more than five million dollars, it’s hard to find a New Yorker on the street who will tell you that’s a step too far.
like this exactly, it just doesn't sound like Radical Socialism Out of Control, and while you can try and make it scary you also need to present a compelling alternative that goes beyond "if we tax houses worth over five million dollars their owners will stop creating jobs out of pique"
sure, but if he's taxing non-resident houses, this has already happened! a profitable business opportunity generally remains profitable after taxation, and if effective redistribution ends up boosting consumer demand then it could even become more profitable.
Now that everyone is discussing Nolan's Odyssey movie, I feel like it's a good time to let non-Italians know that the production dumped plastic props into the Italian sea. Weirdly enough I could not find any article in English about it but it's a fucking problem nonetheless.
I might translate this article later today. This one was the most complete one, even in Italian news it's not talked about that much.
Non è la prima volta che la produzione solleva un vespaio in Sicilia. A Lipari una squadra di sub sarebbe però già impegnata a bonificare i
They dumped plastic skeletons in environmentally protected areas, against the literal contracts they had to sign to get the permits to film in environmentally protected areas. Like they not only did a bad ecological thing that freaked out some divers, they literally broke environmental protection laws and their contract with the Italian government
