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@depressedwhileblack
Limited Bandwidth is Real
So, as a depressed, unsuccessful writer I feel like Iām a failure at everything Iāve ever done. Including this blog. I just donāt have the bandwidth anymore to keep this Tumblr updated.Ā
But what is updated is my FacebookĀ and Twitter. And I post recent articles Iāve written and have been featured in on my website.Ā
DAWN Saved My Life
On Valentine's Day last year, I was released from the mental hospital after trying to end my life. My favorite artist, Dawn Richard,Ā is one of the reasons I'm alive today. #DAWNSavedMyLifeĀ
Read Here
Still Here
*Trigger warning: discussion of suicide attempt*
I cried last night thinking about how hard this past year has been.
Some of us had IVs in our arms. Some of us drank activated charcoal and couldn't walk because of what we did to our bodies.
I didn't think I would live to the end of 2018, but for a lot of us, we're still here.
It's confusing some days. I left the mental hospital in the clothes I attempted in with no house keys and a paper bag.
Sometimes I feel like I'm freefalling with no real direction because I prepared to die but I didn't prepare to live. I'm figuring out what I should do with myself. I don't know what my life should look like after a suicide attempt, but I'm glad to be alive to figure that out.
Some of us are here because we clung to the one floatation device we had. That could be a song, a pet, a dream, or a loved one.
If you're just floating or if you found land, I hope you know that you are not alone and that you are apart of a community of people who feel what you feel and lived what you lived. We're in this together.
14 Things 'Quiet' Borderlines Say That Are Code For 'I Need Help'
āWhen you live with āquietā borderline personality disorder (BPD), oftentimes youāre used to āacting ināĀ ā counter to the āacting outā people have come to associate with BPD. Because of the inward nature of quiet BPD, it might be that much harder for you to come right out and tell someone, āI need help.ā Someone with quiet BPD might resort to using ācode wordsā or phrases to indicate they are struggling to the people in their lives ā without having to say it out loud.ā Read MoreĀ Ā
#MeToo movement is ignoring poor Black women, founder Tarana Burke says
Spotted on No More Martyrs:
"Iāve gotten more death threats from Black men than anybody else. After Cosby was indicted and R. Kelly took off, I got tons of threats from Black men.ā
There is so much to unpack here. We got to step it up and make sure Tarana Burke has the support she needs. Read Article
Mental Health Crisis in Federal Prisons
Federal prisons are not classifying mentally ill inmates as having mental health needs to reduce their workloads. And the lives of inmates are suffering as a result. Read Article
Three Years Later, Sandra Bland's Family Still Want Answers Surrounding Her Death
White supremacy will weaponize our mental health against us, smh. But we ain't forgot. #SayHerNameĀ Read Article
Three Reasons Why It Can Be Harder for Black Women To Get Mental Health Treatment
"What Iāve learned through this is that your therapy sessions should not be a test of how many microagressions you can endure. As black women, we are the experts of our lived experiences. We have the right to have mental health support that acknowledges how our journey is different from others." Read More
I wrote this article for a majority white pub and tried to comply with their toned-down standards but they got shook so here it is on Medium. White mental health pubs will invite you through the door, then tell you to go back out and slam the door in your face the moment you're too black, smh.
I hope you see a piece of yourself in this article.
Black Girl Podcast: Therapy & Personality Disorders Chat with Dr. Jess
Black folks are talking about personality disorders. YESSSSSS.
"NYC based Psychiatrist Dr. Jessica Clemons joins us to discuss mental health, personality disorders, when/how to know therapy is right for you and expectations before starting your sessions." Listen to PodcastĀ
Earl Sweatshirt Returned on His Own Terms
"'Nowhere2go' is the most fluid stream of thoughts Earl has released in some time. This song seems to indicate that he needed to just take some time and get his mind right, after experiencing setback after setback." Read MoreĀ
Do We Really Get Anywhere Working Twice As Hard?
"How do we get to a place where we exist beyond survival?" Read MoreĀ
Brian Tyree Henry Is Learning How to Be a Movie Star
There aren't enough conversations about this:
"I have never been more comfortable in the skin I am in now. Because all my life, I was so body dysmorphic. I had all these people telling me how I look."
āWhat kills me is everyone's like, āHow do you feel about this Emmy nomination?ā ā Henry says to me. āMy mother's dead. Every time I close my eyes, I see my hand on her casket. Every time I close my eyes, I hear my necklace bang on her casket. That's the last time I saw her. That's the only thing that gets me out of bed, and it's sometimes the thing that keeps me in it." Read MoreĀ
I'm Celebrating My Disabled Black Girl Magic Because I'm Done Feeling Invisible
āI tell myself that there is a beauty in disability, not in spite of it.ā Read More
"bein alive & bein a woman & bein colored is a metaphysical dilemma/ i haven't conquered yet/ do you see the point my spirit is too ancient to understand the separation of soul & gender/ my love is too delicate to have thrown back on my face" -Ntozake Shange in "for colored girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow is enuf"
Browns player Chris Hubbard opens up about mental health
āIt just needs to be heard, Hubbard said. āI am telling people now donāt be scared of what you are going through; someone needs to hear what you're going through." Read MoreĀ
Andy Cole: āI apologise now to everybody for being the way Iāve beenā
Andy Cole touches on so many things: racism, toxic masculinity, professional sports culture, and the intersection of chronic illness and mental health crises.
Waking up each day not knowing if your kidney will work is so traumatic. I wish we had more mental health services built into highly stressful medical treatment. Read Article
This is the suicide story you're not hearing.
TW: suicide ideation methods so be careful and take care of yourself first
This article tells the stories of people who survive suicide plans and attempts and learned better-coping methods to move forward.