50% RAT BEAUTY

|he/him|gaytrans|25|hardiness zone 9b|himedanshi high priest| if I ever post anything that isnt agriculture, agriculture news, or agricultural technology, then just let me know and I'll delete it.

[bodyofdeath]

crossfaded on what no longer is and what remains to be seen

[keepthedelta]

possibly the best ever piece of american sports journalism

[theprofessional-amateur]

"This morning, we posted NBC anchor Mary Carillo's 2004 rant about badminton because we had never seen it before and we wanted to share it with the world. Carillo just wrote an email to us, explaining how that monologue made it on the air:

"Can't believe that thing's still around. I was hosting a morning show in Athens that covered a lot of badminton—some table tennis too, but badminton, I'd been assured, was going to be "the curling of the Summer Games." (!) There was no script for that rant—just a little dead time—but it got some chuckles and a head shake from my producer. It was a pretty loose show—I'd already explained a team handball's size by comparing it against various members of the melon family, and when I found out that equestrian horses were listed as "equipment" I did a rant on the fact that horses needed passports to get into the country and dramatically produced one, so surely they needed an identity upgrade..

"That sort of nonsense got me a hosting gig on Torino's Olympic Ice show, which is still one of my all-time favorite scams. Don't know if it's still kicking around, but maybe my salute to Guido The Zamboni Guy is still out there from that wackadoodle show..

"Don't know how I stay employed,carillo

Mary Carillo is cool as hell. Also, someone please bring us her salute to Guido the Zamboni Guy.

Link to Deadspin article

Her salute to Guido the Zamboni Guy at the Torino Olympics

[achillesinhighheels]

lil’ kim, as joan of arc, styled by marc jacobs for flaunt magazine (circa 2005).

[contemptible-scoundrel]

fuck like a green onion

[chryza]

Me when I see the word beaʃte

In my head: ah! The archaic form of the letter s! Being a casual scholar of linguistics myself I am well aware that though it resembles the letter f in modern typography in fact it is phonetically identical to s! How foolish it would be to stumble into such a simple lexiconical pitfall!

Me aloud to myself every time: beeft

[autumnhobbit]

queen shit (and she was right)

[circusheart]

I do think the post that's like "when they torture you to insanity and then torture you for being insane 😂🤣" is one of the most succinct and foundational analyses of interpersonal violence and conflict that had ever been written

[teaboot]

My mom likes to tell me about how when I was a little kid riding public transport with her I'd always smile and giggle and chat with weird old ladies who smelled like cat pee and homeless folks and strangers dressed in bizarre outfits but any time a tidy and respectable businessman in a suit and tie waved at me I'd immediately clam up, and she takes a great deal of pride in my supposed inherentability to clock personalities but the truth is I do vaguely remember those bus rides, and it was never about the clothes or the hair or the smell, but more because everyone "strange" asked interesting questions and listened to what I had to say and seemed to think about what I said while the neat and tidy and rigid folks only ever acted like they were going through the motions, which was boring as hell and also pretty annoying

[teaboot]

Well-to-do finance manager with tidy shoes: "Why hello, sweetheart. Can you say 'hi'? Aren't you cute. Are you on a trip with your mom?"

4 year old me: why must we do this

Fantastic old woman in the leopard print coat: "Why yes, my tooth IS real silver! Nobody ever asks me that. Do you like cats?"

4 year old me, suddenly paying attention: Finally, A Person Of Intellect

[dirt-mann]

following tumblr user saga of a very sweet pitbull running up to them and jumping into their arms while getting the mail and I'm sooo jealous I cannot get a dog right now but if I could the cosmic pitbull delivery system would be great

[animations-daily]

Don’t you think the internet and dreams are similar? They are both areas where the repressed conscious mind vents.

PAPRIKA | パプリカ  (2006) dir. Satoshi Kon 

[trans-asajjventress]

This continues to be a top contender for favorite tweet

[goodgirl-inc]

[goodgirl-inc]

nevermind post cancelled he's dead again

[zeitghost]

[daughter-of-sapph0]

happy pride

[lindleland]

[zmpl]

even if bioessentialism was real and all trans women had some inherent advantage over cis women in sports you could not pay me to give a fuck because sports are made up. they are games people play for fun. even though we as a society invented careers around sport it is still boiled down to the fun made up game where you kick a ball. or dribble a ball. or swim in a pool. or show people how fast you can run. it’s for leisure. fun. not serious. who gives a fuck. fun. #mygame⚽️🏀🏈⚾️

[intersexcat-tboy]

I feel like sports are also a mix of inherent bodily advantages and practice/work. Some people are physically going to be better at certain sports no matter what, some people are going to be better because they've put a lot of work into it. It's like banning tall people from basketball bc it's where they thrive

[normalmammal]

you’re eric bogosian you’re like 70something and you think your days of being a big dick bisexual are over and then you sign on to play a character on some vampire show and within three years you’re posting oldguy thirst traps that make assad zaman foam at the mouth in your instagram comments

[pjackk]

Ok but why are the suckers and losers trying to kill me today

[hungwy]

one final cadaveric spasm for the idiot pigiron husk that was prototype "pjackk" jack