Professional Bitch

[normal-with-adhd-is-a-joke]

Conservative beauty standards are back with a vengeance which means it's especially important to go out this summer with bellies out and bodies unshaved. Also be unapologetically disabled with mobility aids and wearable medical devices and stim toys and ear defenders and all that stuff. You need it. People need to see it. Everyone needs to be reminded that life is unquestioningly more enjoyable when you're not living inside an arbitrary set of rules created by people who are offended by all the wrong things.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

think I've been mildly cursed by a witch

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

for years now my laptop charger has reliably broken every 6 months. admittedly i keep replacing it with the cheapest possible generics, but I've tried differed brands and ALWAYS, 6 months in Death knocks impatiently at my door, its skeletal hand outstretched demanding yet another goddamn power cable. the only feasible explanation is i pissed off a witch. the alternative is that i'm the problem, which seems unikely

[spectraltower]

the witch is called enshittification

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

excellent so is this like a rumpelstiltskin situation or

[kingsonne-zedecks]

Humor aside. Don't buy another USB-C laptop charger. Buy a USB-C power adapter rated for the same power needs as the laptop, Anker makes high quality ones. Then you can easily replace the cable if it wears out.

The power adapter is the expensive part, the cable is cheap, but the cable is always going to fray first. Plus, you can buy a braided cable, or a right-angle cable which are less likely to break in the same way depending on how you use your laptop, and you can get whatever length of cable is convenient for you.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

holy shit you've circumvented the witch's curse. yeah it's the same cable that gives out on me. replaceable parts that so fucking sexy. I'm assuming I just buy one that's the same wattage (65W) as my laptop needs? damn that witch is gonna be PISSED

[kingsonne-zedecks]

You can buy one stronger than your laptops needs if you want. Devices these days are smart enough at power management to only take what they need, so a 100w charger won't brick your laptop or anything, but 65w will work perfect.

The only other thing is that not all USB-C cables are created equally. The form factor is standardized, the insides are not, some shitty, cheap, cables are only rated for data not power, or for low power needs. You can search for charging cable to make sure you get one intended for power transfer.

This witches curse effected me for years on end before I discovered this. I'm happy to foil their efforts once more.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

LIFE HACK UNLOCKED

[prokopetz]

Thoughts on the schism?

"The Society of Saint Pius X pulled some excommunication-worthy fuckshit" is basically any given Wednesday. The only mildly surprising thing is that it took the Vatican this long to pull the trigger!

[rlyehtaxidermist]

I do think that the funniest way to respond to schismatics whose core complaint is that your institution is changing too quickly is to take nearly 40 years to openly declare them schismatics.

[ladythatsmyskull]

[nitpickspot]

So, what you're saying is, under no circumstances should we be reposting the above image as much as humanly possible?

[aqueerkettleofish]

Well, we should certainly make sure that everyone knows about this image, or how will they know not to post it? It's not like "That image of Musk looking like a Nazi" would narrow it down.

[funstyle]

[recommending something i sincerely love] ok so the thing about it is it kinda sucks

[ittybittytatertot]

I hope OpenAI goes under. I hope ChatGPT and all similar AI are unplugged forever. And I hope everyone who's been relying on it cries about it.

[venal-quad]

Dancing in the Panic Room - The Feels Whale (miscellea)

| Patreon | Kofi |

[glitchedgirly]

See the thing about Stratt putting all media ever in the Hail Mary is that it isn’t just for lolz or to keep the crew entertained, it always struck me as something deeply sad. Because even if all the crew survived, there was no way they could consume all possible media ever, language barriers alone would present a problem. And even then, they had a job to do and focus on first (which could have theoretically taken decades of work to figure out) so they wouldn’t have much use for The Great Gatsby or a week’s worth of poorly written amateur Guatemalan experimental opera. Let us remember that Stratt is practical and true utilitarian Instead, I think it was another part of the Hail Mary. If the scientists failed, if the Earth died, then what? Everything would have been completely lost. Art, music, film, history. Destroyed. Without a single living soul to remember it by. It would be as if all of humanity had never existed.

But if it survived? If other alien civilizations discovered traces of humanity? Then the memory of mankind could live on and be remembered. What better way to do that than to send everything (literally everything, the art, the music, the science, the history) out as far as humanly possible so that it might connect with someone else in the universe? It would be a long shot, a Hail Mary, but it was the best chance that humanity had to be remembered

[rabbitscreams]

we need to invent a way to explain how deep running and pervasive and subliminal racism and antiblackness is without immediately sounding like an insane conspiracy theorist

[rabbitscreams]

female characters are always lighter than male characters. strong characters are almost always dark. aggressive characters are almost always dark. peaceful and intelligent characters are almost always light. even amongst darker characters the lightest one is usually either the leader or the girls. dark is evil and light is good.

[rabbitscreams]

if you try to explain this to a white person they look at you like youre insane

[gay-milton-quotes]

briefly pursuing a career in animation radicalized me on this. So many stories from the industry about how you have to start with your character design as dark as possible, because INEVITABLY you'll get "notes" from higher-ups asking you to make them lighter.

In a class about making a pitch bible my teacher once role-played as a shitty executive with a classmate, pressing them in intentionally abrasive ways about why they made their characters diverse. He emphasized that we had to learn to defend these things, because the racism in the industry is extremely deliberate.

[vforvalensa]

Ronald Wimberly's comic essay, Lighten Up, stays evergreen

[thickness-protection-program]

Why is this heat so hot 😩

[fagapult]

It’s the heat

[thickness-protection-program]

Source?

[mamoswole]

[thickness-protection-program]

[pepsimansthickjuicymeatyschlong]

[draconym]

Yesterday I was at my local antique store and I was chatting with the owner, with whom I've been acquainted for nearly a decade because I love buying people's used junk and I'm always in there, and he revealed that he has a husband who loves Victorian furniture.

This didn't surprise me but I also like to think that I obviously read as some flavor of dyke and I immediately wondered why he had never mentioned his husband in conversation before. "Why today, after nine years of stopping by this store on my way home from work?" I thought. Then I got home and took off my wallet chain and noticed the new charm I added to it last week:

Don't underestimate the power of cheesy little rainbow trinkets in building community, I guess

[cottoncandylesbo]

[were--ralph]

i cant believe someone came in my inbox in my home and tried to get me to sympathize with zionism im stupid but not that stupid

[gallusrostromegalus]

A cat is a machine that turns proteins into violence.

[starathsbunker]

#Helios was declawed by his former owners so he doesn't just slap things he dislikes like most cats#he really only feels confident in hissing at them#Especially because a lot of the thing he doesn't like are bugs and those are sharp sometimes :(#Selene has figured this out and now when she hears him hiss she sprints over the kill the fuck out of the bug#Helios has learned she will do this so he'll hiss at stuff louder and louder until she hears him#A nervous old man and his emotional support homicidal maniac tags by @gallusrostromegalus

I couldn't reblog without the tags because the context is hilarious

[gallusrostromegalus]

A Nervous Old Man (right) and his Emotional Support Violence Machine (Left)

Yes, he is more than twice her size. Yes, he is five times her age. Yes, he cries like a big baby until she kills Unacceptable Scary Things (earwigs) for him.

[cm8x-insanity]

I couldn't get these two and their dynamic out of my head, @gallusrostromegalus I doodled them (guessed on their collars)

[gallusrostromegalus]

OH MY GOD MY CATS HAVE FANART

[basuralindo]

So I just simultaneously did, and possibly didn't lose my job today :)

Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.

So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.

But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.

It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?

So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:

Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.

And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.

So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".

So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.

I don't know what else to say aside from I've been laughing all day and I'm gonna have a hell of a time explaining Schrodinger's Unemployment to the benefits office.

[basuralindo]

Update that is not an update because I'm basically certain this isn't what actually happened:

My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.

Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.

Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.

Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).

Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues

(also shout out to the person who proposed Carmen Sandiego)

[basuralindo]

ACTUAL (partial) UPDATE:

According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.

Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.

For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.

So now I'm officially out of a job. Because my workplace was literally stolen in the night.

[basuralindo]

Actually fuck it let's share some photos cause I wouldn't be inclined to believe this myself. It's not like anyone can stalk me at my job now and I'm not gonna have to see any coworkers that might find my tumblr.

Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life

Aaand a close-up:

The last remains of a once Very Much Solid And Immobile Workplace

[basuralindo]

HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE

via @kagaminilen

[mysteryteacup]

[cut to a kiosk on legs, sipping a boba, while wandering into the nearest forest on chicken legs]

[ardanelvilyafeanturi]

Here you go @a-bit-too-dyscrasic

[a-bit-too-dyscrasic]

Oh my goodness you're my hero this is so beautiful

[basuralindo]

Holy fuck my job got fan art

[asexualbookbird]

hey. is this yours?

[basuralindo]

HOLY SHIT

edit: I should clarify this isn't my kiosk. my kiosk was probably taken out in pieces and most likely by mall management. but it's an extremely funny coincidence

[basuralindo]

SMALL UPDATE

Still haven't heard back from the unemployment office, but a few days ago I ended up telling this to the SNAP caseworker, who absolutely lost her shit and then put everything on hold to go investigate this herself out of a sense of justice and Needing To Know More. World's most nosy angel who helped me out a lot in general (in case she ends up seeing this: I appreciate her so much).

While she didn't find a facebook listing for a used kiosk (yes, that post is just a coincidence, I'm sorry), what she did find was the actual kiosk for sale. By the owner. On a reputable website.

Now, there are a lot of funny conclusions to be drawn from this, but I'm afraid it's not quite that wild. I asked a friend in management about it and turns out the listing is from months before the disappearance, it wasn't kept a secret, it just wasn't relevant. She had been trying to sell it for a while without much luck, wasn't selling the entire business, but just the kiosk with that branch included (the listing advertised that it would include the equipment and drink recipes and retain the current staff). It also said the lease with the mall was active until some time in 2027.

So, no, as funny as that would be, the owner did not heist her own kiosk. However, what this does tell us is:

She must have owned the kiosk outright, so the only way this could be a repossession is if she had a mortgage on it? I guess?

It definitely isn't about the lease being up. So any eviction would legally require like 30-days notice and, presumably, a valid reason like a violation of the terms. (this is how it works with renting homes in my country, and I've never rented a business location, so I can only guess that it's similar)

The store was not financially beneficial enough to keep. This could just mean that she was focusing on other ventures like she says in the listing, but it could really also mean that she was having money trouble and couldn't afford to keep the location.

SO. This leaves the most likely scenario being that the owner was behind on rent, and the mall manager (who has a history of being outta control and pulling shit like this, as well as harassing asian businesses and our shop specifically) decided to illegally remove the entire kiosk about it.

Still no confirmation at all about anything, but I remembered the listing today and realized it gave some additional clues.

Also, sorry to go asking, but I'm gonna slip my ko-fi link in here because both final checks and unemployment are taking much longer than expected, and I had to move apartments very suddenly (like found out the day after losing my job kine sudden), which is burning through my savings too. The job market in my region is absolute dogshit right now and I'm partially disabled so I'm kinda freaking out. Everyone's struggling right now so if you're enjoying the story but can't donate please don't feel guilty, I also like sharing the laughs.

[were--ralph]

As a long time follower who has appreciated your trans and body positivity posts, I'm extremely saddened to see you share a post claiming you are not a safe space for Zionists.

Zionism is simply the belief that Jewish people get to live in Israel, a land that they are indigenous to. Zionists have a diversity of thought when it comes to how to accomplish this goal, many are appalled at the recent actions of the Israeli government, but they all agree that Jews deserve to live in their ancestral homeland.

At least 80% of Jews identify as Zionist, and antizionist movements have stoked intense antisemitism accross the world. I do believe one can criticise Israel without being antisemitic, but that requires a level of nuance that the majority of antizionists are not interested in undertaking. As it stands, the antizionist movement is a lot of people being ok marching with nazis.

There are real tragedies happening in Gaza, but labelling it a "genocide" (it isn't) or denying Israel's right to defend itself against a terrorist organization (look up reports of how Hamas "helps" palestinians) doesn't actually move us towards peace, it just means you have a group of people you feel justified in hating.

I generally don't send these, and have lost many beloved blogs to the scourge of antisemitism under the guise of antizionism, but I'm hoping that you're willing to listen and reflect on how you approach Jews and zionism.

im not reading all that

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

[swagophile]

important reminder that most people you follow online are significantly lamer than you think they are including me. and if you feel insecure comparing yourself to someone online: DON'T. theyre probably also lame and weird. most people on the internet are

[most-sane-classicist]

reblog if you're also lame and weird.