Dreams With a Dash of Spice

I'm a queer, autistic writer who loves to write and read! This is a place for me to drop my thoughts and resources. Rus, any pronouns. Camp NaNo Winner 2020!  

[dreamswithadashofspice]

A Deal Worth Taking

Do you like pirates? Do you like lesbians? Do you like nonbinary pirate lesbians? Well damn, I have a story for you!

Summary:

Rusiko Terttu didn't expect to find herself on a pirate ship off the coast of eastern Sweden -- if you could call a bunch of Robin Hood wannabes "pirates". Something about "debts that need to be paid and vengeance that needs to be served", but really, she had other things to do like recording the behavioural patterns of seals and sirens and making sure that weird octopus-shark hybrid thing she found was fed. And keeping an eye on her little brother. Honestly. These pirates didn't have their priorities straight.

...The Captain was cute though. 

Captain Marzia Rafa'el demands nothing less than perfection from their crew because otherwise they gets an absolute shipwreck. When they kidnapped the infamous lover of a corrupt politician sticking his nose where it shouldn't be, Marzia didn't expect her to be so... adamant about the care and keeping of her lamp faeries. Or clever enough to use them to escape. Seven times. Odin help her. 

Genres:

Low Fantasy, LGBTQ+, Queer, Historical, Action, Adventure, Romance.

Content warnings: 

Violence, death, sexism (minimal), neglectful parents, kidnapping, hostages, forced marriage. 

Annnnnnnnnd here’s my second podcast in the making! It’s less under production than The D.A.H.L.I.A. Project, but it’s definitely a WIP. Oh, and in case I forgot to mention before:

- All my characters are queer. All of ‘em. Somehow, some way, they will be.

- On that same note, pretty much all characters will be autistic as well. The main cast? Definitely autistic. If they aren’t autistic, they probably have some other disability. So if that’s your jam, well, then I’m your dude!

Big thanks to my friend for being essentially my Swedish culture editor :D 

If you’re interested in this story or would like to learn more, feel free to drop an ask or @ me to be added to a tag list! 

[prompts-in-a-barrel]

“Get up.”

“Don’t you get it? You won. I yield.”

“Like hell you do. I know you’re a better swordsman than that. Get up.”

[miraculousfanworks]

Attract Those Readers: When to Post on Ao3

Miraculous Fanworks Guide: When to post and when not to post on Ao3

Do you struggle to attract readers to your Ao3 fanfictions? Looking to boost your numbers on a fic?

Then you’ve come to the right place!

When to post to get those eyeballs on your piece:

Using a script they coded themselves, Olcalhoun conducted a year-long study of Ao3′s posting times tracking four things:

How many users were online.

How many new stories were posted in the last 10 minutes.

How many stories were added to the feature box in the last 10 minutes.

How many stories were in both the ‘new’ and ‘featured’ boxes.

Olcalhoun collected over 50,000 data points, and found that the best times to post on Ao3 were Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday, from 12pm to 5pm PST.

It’s science!

When not to post:

However, if there’s a good time to post, when is the worst time to post? The answer, provided in this post by jenroses, is anytime between 5pm and 10pm PST. The worst day to post overall is Friday.

But why?

Turns out there’s a bug in Ao3′s system. If you post during that time, your story will have a manually-set publication date.

What this means is if you post between 5pm and 10pm PST, your story will not appear on the top of the new stories in the tag. 

Your story will appear “earlier” than those stories–lower on the front page than stories posted hours before.

So now you know: 

do post on Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday from 12pm to 5pm PST

do not post on Friday, or from 5pm to 10pm anyday 

Happy writing!

-Cass

Image credit.

[fuzipenguin]

I guess if you care about these things, here you go? Since I rely on word of mouth by posting notifications on twitter/tumblr, etc of a new story going up, I never really considered all this.

[pens-swords-stuff]

What is a writer?

Wrong answers only.

[dreamswithadashofspice]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[diazami]

I feel this in my soul

[one-time-i-dreamt]

God, I know this is long, but please open this image by image and read the worst possible take I've ever seen anyone have on why writing fanfiction about real people is okay, please I beg you read this because it's hilarious! I'd like to thank the person who sent me this yesterday because I've been thinking of it ever since.

[carrion-throne]

i was like “oh come on, it can’t be THAT bad” and subsequently read the worst series of words i’d ever laid eyes upon

[one-time-i-dreamt]

@anonymouseyesamongwalls how dare you try to hide this in the tags

[collaberal-damage]

Transcript for those who can't read these screenshots:

its not objectification/creepy/gross its the same thing movie makers and mangakas do every day - cast real people they like and who fit the role they're writing as their lead character

its just fiction.

fanfic is just fans playing with each other. celebs should just stay out of it and let fans have their fun. but now they want to control what you say, control what you write, control what kind of reviews you can give, control what you imagine. Its gone too far. before you go read a fanfic you already know whats gonna be in it, so why would you read it?

personally i hate slash fic and shipping stuff, and i will never read it. as soon as i see that sort of thing i hit the 'back' button. i'm not gonna read it and then complain. i have had some of my own fanfic stories become so popular that the celebs themselves read them and then complained about them. i was just like...if you are sensitive do not read fanfic. its a free for all, and that is the way it should stay if you ask me. they are so nosy. what we write isn't for them its for other fans

i had a celeb get my story deleted and tell me his kid doesn't like my story because i called his wife a silly name. it was just a joke. and this is a HUGE star too. i was just like 'wow way to be a pussy." also why is his kid reading stories marked as mature? take your child self on and do some homework. what kinda raising is that? but this star had this whole fit about how i cant write about his wife and speak about her without respect, then two years later he announced that he cheated on her and they were getting a divorce

omg i HOLLERED. I was screaming. he was the one who didn't respect his wife and family, not me. I was just having fun writing fiction. none of it was real. his disrespect to her was real and the pain from that is gonna last forever.

oh and btw's he lost his next wife too Imao oh wait no that was a fiance now he has a new wife. point is; hes trash

anyway, my point is, celebrities: stay off fans' stories and off their twitters/tumblrs/instagrams. thats not your business

what i'm saying is when a celebrity takes photo or video for something they only consent for it to be used in certain ways. so then someone takes that footage and puts it in a porn when they never authorized that. that's illegal

when i write a fanfiction, its already obvious that its not describing real events, and it is explicitly stated on the story that this is a work of fiction, the star does not appear in it themselves. the story itself is my creation - the concepts, plot, dialogue, and the writing itself is all supplied by me. so it belongs to me. if a celebrity wants to sue me for writing a story about them they are suing me for using....the general idea of them? how is that a thing? thats not a thing.

no i dont see it that way at all. and i dont see it as bad at all. its just a story

the people who keep disliking my opinion on this are only feeling that way becuase they dont have an imagination, any talent, or any writing skills. I've written so many stories over the years since i was a kid - original and fanfic. I've written 3 books. I'm not saying they were great books, but I wrote them. And whether a story i create is original or fanfic, i write them the same way. theyre not really different at all. Its not like one story is a "real story" and the other is "sick exploitation" theyre the same.

people who dont write will never really understand the process of making something. They will always take things personally and say xyz is weird and gross because they dont understand the motivations, the process, or the meaning behind it.

the events that i put in a story are there to serve the plot that i created. people who dont write get upset because of events that were chosen but these events are devices and vehicles that we use in writing to get across our greater message and/or theme, and to trigger other events that come later. sometimes its about relationship progression, sometimes its about character growth, sometimes its about intensifying conflict. but there are reasons that we write what we write.

people who arent very bright will look at it in a very reductive way and say "its sick exploitation" kinda like how stupid people look at abstract art and say "a 5 year old could do that"

the fact that people dont value fanfiction or are unable to make a good fanfiction themselves does not make fanfiction "bad" or illegal. we already have too much censorship. people should stop trying to turn their personal tastes into laws. "i dont like it so it should be illegal"

um ok but no

This whole topic has taught me one thing though.....

I was thinking of writing a Kihyun fanfic today....after seeing him in that red suit....mmm mmm MMM! our boy was looking finger licking good!

so when i write it and it gets all popular i'll be sure to lock it down and make it fans only so he cant ever get his hamster paws on it 😂

kihyun looking for ways to get my story deleted:

[An image of a hamster at a keyboard.]

i'm already a step ahead of you kiki

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Thank you so much for doing this, you're an angel!

[muppethole-deactivated20240312]

i feel like people have forgotten how to be a generous audience when they read/watch something. like sometimes you have to buy into some bullshit plot points or a deus ex machina or a few loopholes as the price of admission for an otherwise fun time. sometimes these things are just gears that get us to where the story really wants to be, and too many people get caught up in those gears. sometimes you gotta meet a story halfway.

[eternally-creating]

You gotta be willing to engage with a story in order for the story to have a chance…I call it “getting over the CinemaSins mindset”

[writing-prompt-s]

The princess was cursed that her first husband would die a horrible death. In order to avoid this horrible fate the royal family used you as a scapegoat and married you to the princess. But because of your immortality you have died over 20 times and still come back to life.

[theresawritesstuff]

“Darling one of these days we should really let my parents in on your, um, condition.”

The arrow lodged within my chest comes out cleanly as I remove it, admiring the feathers before adding it to my collection. “Now where’s the fun in that, love? Their assassins are just starting to get creative.”

[theresawritesstuff]

(this prompt was keeping me up at night so here you go… A bit different than how I normally write but I had fun with it!)

My first brush with death was, technically speaking, before I was really alive.

You see, my father was a necromancer who saved his lady love from an untimely end. Coincidentally, she was also with child at the time of this little intervention. There’s no telling if he ever considered the ramifications of his defiance of fate that day. I never did ask. I don’t know that it would have made much of a difference. So long as he had my mother back.

We lived well, my parents and I. My father made his living as a “healer” whose reputation preceded him in a number of social circles, bringing with it many a well paying customer hoping to buy his discrepancy. Duelists who let things get out of hand. Those with secrets and regrets they wished to undo as quietly as possible. Their reasons never really mattered much so long as they paid in full. Some made surprisingly good children’s entertainers. But I suppose people will do just about anything when there’s a life on the line. Even answer an endless stream of questions from a child up passed their bedtime.

By the time of my second brush with death I had grown into a young man. All told it was rather underwhelming. The stable had caught fire from a lightning strike. In my rush to save the horses I foolishly turned my back on our more unpredictable mare, earning me an unfortunate blow to the head.

I woke up in the mud before my father even reached the scene. I assumed then that I had just been lucky. If my parents had any suspicions to the contrary, they never voiced them.

Keep reading

[dreamswithadashofspice]

I love this SO much, this is so fun! Man I wish this was a full story / a tv show, I would 100% pay to read this.

[purgatorypoetry]

I'm tripping again, fumbling, with a map and compass stumbling though a passage, ancient, crumbling against my stomach's anxious rumbling, I'm sorry -

I do that sometimes I subscribe to their every potion they prescribe I imbibe in attempt to derive a destination other than derelict does destiny die in the dim light like I and why oh why am I can I still be playing so hard at something while so consistently saying nothing?

wordplay, but she's through with you before the foreplay, nothing more to say, it's ok it's nothing new - nothing aside from a sleight of skeletal hand, the awkward attempt to stand steady under the weight of such heavy...everything

weighs upon my emaciated frame framed by the oddly placed protrusion of bones like some long-abandoned home's crumbling shame, as if the skeleton's gotten wise to the game and it's already plotting its escape from this already rotting cage it's got cash and passports stashed in a case in some safe place, babe, you know what they say about rats and sinking ships,

what they say about attempts to rise above the heavy reprise of guise to exorcise the heavy veil of obscurity there is this:

I am going to live with the doctors for a little while and try to do some healing maybe meet myself on the other side if I'm still there

I love you for being you and I love you for loving me through and I'm trying to learn to love me again maybe on the way that you do, like you do stay tuned

I'm not nearly through

[dreamswithadashofspice]

I left for two months and I suddenly have 75 notes on something??? what happened

[veliseraptor]

that ‘pakige?’ post but me, a couple hours after posting a fic, like ‘comints?’

[kitten-kin]

[leahazel]

F5 F5 F5

[kitten-kin]

… F5 F5 F5 F5F5F5F5F5

[icouldbeawritermaybe]

[cheekbites-moved-deactivated202]

[id: a tweet by Sam Skyes that reads:

A cool thing about writing is that the better you get at it, the more you’re aware of what you want out of it, which means it gets harder, which means you actually feel like you’re getting worse.

And by “cool thing,” I mean “what the fuck, man” /end id]

[katherynefromphilly]

Thank you yes this is happening now.

[ao3commentoftheday]

use a horizontal rule instead of special characters if you’d like your fic to work for people who use screen readers

[pokegeek151]

[Video description: a TikTok made by ao3commentoftheday explaining how to add an accessible line break to an AO3 work. The video is of the fic writing page of AO3, showing a row of asterisks separating “lorem ipsum” text with captions that match what is being spoken.

“Let’s talk about scene breaks and accessibility.

If you’re writing your scene breaks and you do something like this, a screen reader will actually read out each one of these symbols.

Screen readers are software that’s used by visually impaired people, dyslexic people, and people who like to listen to their fic instead of read it.

And screen readers will take a look at this list of asterisks and they’ll actually say asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, etc. Not something you want to be listening to in the middle of a fic.”

The image on the screen cuts to a zoomed out view of the same page with the rich text formatting options visible at the top. The captions include two pointing up emojis directed at the section break button, a small square button with a single horizontal line. The video zooms in on this button as the speaker continues.

“Instead of using a series of symbols, you can use this feature here in the Rich Text menu, and it will put a horizontal bar between one scene and the next, so you get that visual separation without making life horrible for people who use screen readers.”

The speaker clicks the button, causing a thin horizontal bar to appear in the text box where the row of asterisks had been.“

The video ends with the TikTok end screen featuring the user’s name and profile picture. /end video description]

It seemed ironic to me that a video about how to make your work accessible didn’t already have a video description, so here you go

[kedreeva]

As someone who uses a reader for fic… The horizontal rule IS nicer than a load of asterisk or other things that may be read out BUT my own reader doesn’t acknowledge the horizontal rule in any way, not even to pause. This can make scene breaks hard to distinguish. Unfortunately I don’t have a solution, but I’m wondering if this is the case for anyone else, and if there’s a reader app that DOES acknowledge the HR. Because I personally prefer when there’s like, just a couple of markers (like 3 asterisks, or dashes) so I can actually tell when a scene changes, but without having to sit through a string of 20 of them.

[fixomnia-scribble]

This is so useful! I have further questions, if anyone would like to throw in their thoughts.

I like the hr bar too, but I gather from the notes that some screen readers skip right over them. So:

- What’s the least annoying symbol to have spoken three times in a row to indicate a break?

- What about making a teeny weeny sized “Scene Break” text line look like a short centered visual line? Would that get picked up? Maybe with a dash either side?

- Does using a simple inserted image as a scene break cause more issues? For example if I use a short New York cityscape border in between sections but alt-text it with “Scene break” or “Scene change”, would that be useful or pull the listener out?

- What do podfic readers do/say when they come to a break? (This is a world I haven’t explored as podcasts and I just don’t do well together.) Is there a verbal cue, or is it done through inflection and timing?

[kedreeva]

A dash (-). The screen reader will say “dash dash dash” which is short and simple. (personally I also like tilde (~) because it sounds nice, but that’s a personal preference only)

The screen readers read whatever text is there, so it would be easier for you to use “dash dash dash” than to have it read “dash scene break dash.”

My reader doesn’t read images, only text, so an image would be the same problem as a horizontal rule. I don’t know if alt-text would read or not, but I’m willing to test it if you want to upload something for me to try.

A lot of them use music or other sounds between scenes, or at least take a longer pause so you know it’s a break. Thank you to all podfic readers I love you for recording fic so folks can hear it in a non-monotone reader voice.

@ao3commentoftheday

[fixyourwritinghabits]

Keep in mind Screenreaders treat every website the same, so if you’re posting your work elsewhere, keep this in mind!

[theolddivorcedzukka]

i hope you write, i hope we both write

[my-true-gender-is]

my gender is a sexy androgynous pirate with smudged eyeliner and the top few buttons of my shirt undone

[writing-prompt-s]

You’re the first person to be sent to Mars. When you land you decide to take out your phone and take some photos so you can send them to your friends later. After a few minutes you get a notification: “NEW BLUETOOTH DEVICE “HELP ME” DETECTED - WOULD YOU LIKE TO CONNECT?“

[dreamswithadashofspice]

Walking on Mars was an experience.

Would’ve been a nicer experience with someone around so it didn’t feel like you were trapped in some horror-sci-fi story but it is what it is. Or rather, it was what it was.

You were always alright being alone. Solitude and spending time getting to know yourself was your jam, but you did have a few close friends who you hung out with from time to time.

You’d miss them. But this was an opportunity you would never forget.

Mainly because there was no coming back. But also because it was cool.

So when you got the notification, you were confused. Scared. Then annoyed. Someone on the team must be messing with you.

You rolled your eyes and leaned against the work desk, waving a hand into the cameras.

“Very funny guys. Fake bluetooth notifications are a great thing to send to someone alone on a completely new planet that is uninhabited. Really appreciate the love.”

The camera didn’t move. The recording light blinked red on and off, meaning they were still getting the feed, but there was no response.

Childish.

You clicked “no” on the screen, then went about your day. If you could call it a day. You were still adjusting to the whole “time is a meaningless construct” and “you need a schedule to stay sane” conundrum. You decided to go for a happy medium: do the same things every day at different times.

And all was normal, other than the lack of communication from the team. Maybe there was a solar flare or something. Wasn’t your problem.

Until it was.

The next day, you heard a banging noise from inside the vents. It clanged and thumped like nobody’s business and there was really nothing you could do about it because no way were you going in there. Gross. Do you know what vents are like after dust and calcium build up? Disgusting, that’s what they’re like.

A new notification popped up.

“NEW BLUETOOTH DEVICE "IT’S COMING” DETECTED - WOULD YOU LIKE TO CONNECT?“

You glance at the vents. At your phone. At the vents again.

And you decline.

The vents rattle, a keening wail billowing out of them, sending you scrambling back into the wall.

There’s nobody on this planet other than you. There’s no way. Well, unless somehow a cat or mouse got on the ship and survived all this way AND got onto the station without you noticing but the possibility of that was statistically SO unlikely that–

NEW BLUETOOTH DEVICE "IT’S HERE” DETECTED - WOULD YOU LIKE TO CONNECT?

You run.

[cupcakesmoothie]

You open the door and are faced with a delivery person.

"Your large pepperoni pizza order.”

[dreamswithadashofspice]

LMAO THAN KYOU THIS IS THE BEST I FUCKING LOVE IT

[sounddesignerjeans-deactivated2]

Visit Original Link

Easily the best audio post I’ve ever made

[halgorithmic]

Guys lemme tell you bout this thing

To give you perspective , I dont really feel my legs unless I’ve worked out for at least five minutes and it’s been like this for a couple years now so when the first couple seconds popped up I was like “yoo this kinda sounds good? Familiar?” Then THAT shift happened and istg I could feel all of my limbs and they all were screaming at me with the fight or flight response. Freaked me the fuck out man but good song

[sounddesignerjeans-deactivated2]

come listen to my song, it will tear off your fucking legs

[perfectlygenericblog]

“Oh, your song slaps? That’s cute. This one amputates.”

[uberfluss]

if i had my soul it’d escaped at this

[hawkyaly]

Opposite of the original song, no contagious dancing, only paralyzing fear.

[running-with-toast]

dragged this mp3 file out of a fuckin swamp

[little-wintry]

i expected to get fucking rickrolled. this is worse.

[micaxiii]

[decepticonsensual]

Look, I don’t know if there’s such a thing as the opposite of an ASMR video, but this EXTREMELY CURSED OBJECT is it, I was curled into a ball wracked by horrified shivers.

[emilianmodemedia]

stopped it 20 seconds in, my bones felt as if they were rotting from within

[dagny-hashtaggart-deactivated20]

Magnificently unwholesome. Like the bubbling of the damned.

[official-lucifers-child]

this sounds like someone took a bunch of different-toned blasters from star wars and shot them all in rhythm in a way that made this monstrosity

i love this. but also this made me nearly die.

[opalcrow]

🥴

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

good fucking Christ

[swa-shed-aquasi-deactivated2023]

idk I think it’s funky, alien music and I like it

[rose-above-dark-deactivated2023]

[spookyskele700]

Fucking hell it feels like my head and my heart are burning from the anxiety this song causes me

Listening to this makes me struggle to breath, like i just fell down the stairs

I fucking hate this

[jj-isnt-a-bunni-deactivated2023]

I FUCKING RECOILED

IM SO UNCOMFORTABLE THINKING ABOUT IT. I AM NOT SLEEPING TONIGHT OR THIS WILL HAUNT MY DREAMS OH MY GOD I HATE THIS WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING

[world-hostage-situations]

World Hostage Situation

[zoppzoop]

Wdym???

This song is a bop

*totally not having a heart attack rn*

[rat-girl-big-tits]

I love 100 gecs

[dee-the-red-witch]

That HURT. This is the song that ends the earth. This is what you hear when the Event Horizon comes crashing out through a black hole. This was. SO NOT GOOD.

[naamahdarling]

I love the original too much to find this troublesome at all.

[headspace-hotel]

I feel like this post is similar to to “cis dudes experience simulated period cramps” but it’s “NTs experience sensory overload.”

[dreamswithadashofspice]

Okay actually you're right, if you wanna know what sensory overload feels like, put this at full blast on your headphones.