eargasmic bands

Sam, 17, she/her, mostly All time low and Fall out boy with some random stuff thrown in. Proven smarter than Jack Barakat 10/21/13

[tonightweredrinkingfromthebong]

gwen stefani was right when she said this shit is bananas

[saddest-cat-hours]

[blairvvitchproject]

put this in the fucking moma, the louvre, the guggenheim, the whitney, and the motherfucking prado

[badromantics]

I NEVER NOTICED YOU COULD READ THIS WHOLE THING WITH THE BEAT OF THE SONG

[nest-deactivated20181209]

every episode of kitchen nightmares

head chef, who happens to be covered head to toe in centipedes and stale canola oil: i am Cobfident that chef ramsay will enjoy my food. there is nothing wrong with my food. my food is perfect, five stars. 

gordon ramsay: i will have the risotto 

head chef: ok [throws some rice into a sewer, lights it on fire, and empties a packet of frozen kraft singles into the flames] 

gordon ramsay: *takes a bite* this sucks 

head chef: Oh, so we got a bitch and a liar here? Chef Ramsey doesn’t like my food, huh? So we got a blasphemer and a false prophet here, huh? Chef Ramsay dosent know what the fuck or shit he is talking about and I’m personally about to knock him out cold with my massive ballsack.

[lavenderblue-kittykitty]

I love the Sanders gang

• Bernie, who wants to fix the country • Thomas, who makes us laugh and smile • Colonel, who makes some damn nice chicken

[owlmylove]

the father, the son and the finger-licking spirit

[owlmylove]

i have 0% memory of making this comment

[gumtooth]

the sun has no business tapping out at the tender hour of 5pm bitch i have depression

[carazelaya]

[drunkenkeith]

This is exactly what you think it is

[spectacledotter]

I knew it was coming and I still burst out laughing

[grawly]

is there a word for when you see a good post and then keep scrolling but it kinda slow cooks in the front of your mind for maybe about 10 seconds and then you finally scroll back up to reblog it

[amanitaphalloides-deactivated20]

the internet has ruined me honestly i’m numb to everything. it could be the end of the world and i’d be like “tag urself i’m the acid rain”

[conspiracyking]

getting a lecture from your parents like

[systlin]

GUYS THEY FIGURED OUT THE ROMAN CONCRETE RECIPE THAT MAKES IT IMMUNE TO SEAWATER

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/technology/mystery-of-2000-year-old-roman-concrete-solved-by-scientists/ar-BBDO5VC

[beautifultoastdream-deactivated]

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

[systlin]

I KNOW RIGHT?!???

[ella-raene]

I can’t help but feel this is one of those things where we had actual documents saying “it was done with this and this”, and some old rich white guys looked at it and went “oh mirth, the ancients were so silly. They probably wrote this basic stuff down and the actual builders had Secret Techniques we need to Discover”

For a long time, archeologists didn’t know how greek women did their high-piled braids and hair. There was a word that translated to “needle” in the descriptions. They went, “seems like we’ll never know.” Then a hairdresser took a fucking needle (big needle) and did the fucking thing you do with needles, which is sew - and by sewing the braids into place, she replicated ancient styles.

The Egyptians had diagrams of construction steps for their pyramids. Archeologists went “oooh, ancient primitive people, how they do this?” LITERALLY MYTHBUSTERS OR THE OLD DISCOVERY CHANNEL or someone went “what if we did the thing the pictures said they did” AND GUESS FUCKING WHAT. GUESS FUCKING WHAT.

Also that thing with native Americans saying squirrels taught them how to get sap for maple syrup, and colonizers going “that’s a myth sweaty”

Sincerely, if the scientists had to do actual analysis like spectroscopy or whatever, kudos, and no flame. But swear to god, if all these years, we’ve had the recipes and there was just this fuckin institutional bias against just TRYING THE THING THEY SAID WOULD WORK, HELLFIRE AND DEMENTIA.

[systlin]

In this case, it was more they had roman writings saying what went into it but figured there was some secret because when they followed roman recipes it never turned out quite right. 

Because the sources left by Romans always just said to mix with water. Because, if you were a Roman??? Obviously you knew that you used seawater for cement. Duh. That’s so obvious that they never really bothered specifying that you use seawater to mix it, because it wasn’t necessary, everyone knew that. 

But then the empire fell, other empires rose and fell, time passed, and by the time we were trying to reconstruct the formula the ‘mix the dry ingredients with seawater’ trick had been forgotten, until chemical analysis finally figured it out again. 

It’s sort of like the land of Punt, a ally of Egypt that’s mentioned all the time, but we don’t actually know where it was located. Because it isn’t written down anywhere. Why would they write it down? It’s Punt. Everyone knew where Punt was back then. It’d be ridiculous to waste the ink and space to specify where it was, every child knows about Punt. 

3000 years later and we have no damned clue where it was, simply because at the time it was so blindingly obvious that it was never written down. 

[feitanswife]

So moral of story is be specific

[chronicmuppetbrain]

I was thinking it was stupid that they didn’t specify seawater but then I had the thought that we don’t specify to use chicken eggs in baking because DUH so we just write eggs

[aethersea]

2000 years in the future people are going to be making scrambled fish eggs and crying bc the ancient recipes make no sense

[liryae-blog]

There is literally nothing in nature that blooms all year long, so do not expect yourself to do so.

[library-mermaid-blog]

Customers who get angry when I read them their total cost are so compelling to me. Take charge of your narrative, Janice. Be the hero of your own story. You are the one who is purchasing $113.67 worth of adult zen coloring books, Janice. It’s not me you hate, Janice. It’s not me.

[femboy-genius-deactivated202407]

Being up at 4-5 am is like loading in a level but the textures haven’t loaded all the way through yet.

[femboy-genius-deactivated202407]

[dualdestinies-archive-deactivat]

i like this text post a lot because it’s a comparison between two extremely different styles of humor despite it, effectively, being the same joke

[yesterdaysprint]

Feather River Bulletin, Quincy, California, March 20, 1924

[mgmks]

Danger Days Predictions

We live in a dystopian society but Fireflies by Owl City is still a certified banger 

[iamnotsebastianstan-archive-dea]

All Time Low are my favourite band because as embarrassing as they are as people, they stopped a song at their Hammersmith show this year so that Jack and Alex could tell people that there was absolutely “no dabbing in our fucking mosh pit” and i respect that about them