I'm new in town and it gets worse

~ Alex ~ 28 ~ They/Them ~ I have so many sideblogs because I have to compartmentalize or I die ~ Theatre ~ Podcasts ~ OFMD/WWDITS ~ Ted Lasso ~ Stargate ~ Tolkien

[muzzlesbian]

ublock origin is not enough i need advertisers to feel physical pain

[parkchanwoohoo]

[the-big-mood]

[wizardshark]

How do I explain Plato's allegory of the cave to my cat?

[sexshopshenanigans]

gato’s allegory of the fishtank

[explicitnoir]

[skopostheorie]

[pharmersonly]

me when i engage with something that i know is gonna piss me off: wow that pissed me off

[thoodleoo]

yknow how some museums will have replicas of artifacts for you to touch? they should do that but with things i can put in my mouth. like little candies shaped like roman coins or potsherds or bits of egyptian glass or what have you. let me eat the artifacts. let me in. let me innnnnnn

[blessthosewhocurseyou]

Ancient artifact themed candy would be so cool for a museum gift shop to have

[velvetwar]

[artistic-lightcycle]

They have little pyramide shaped icecream at the pyramids in Giza and it tasted amazing.

[cartooncoyote]

This is actually the best intro to a porno that has ever existed

[satanblessitt-deactivated201608]

There is no way this is a porno

[zombiesahoy]

This is the best porno there has ever been.

[usingtimewisely]

The way he says “HEY WHAT THE FUCK” shaped me as a person

[foldingfittedsheets]

I hope today someone is in the lucky 10,000 and sees this for the first time.

[aroace-polyshow]

truly nothing funnier than having an archive of when you first started getting into a media that has since consumed your entire life

[aroace-polyshow]

you see an old post of yours thats dated like a month after you got introduced to Media and it says like “huh im kinda liking Blorbo Bingus? but he’s not really my favorite. he seems sillyyy though he’s neat i’m sure he’s nice :)” and you just

[sufjansjoy]

mm you’re being such an okay boy for daddy. could be better could be worse. you will receive neither reward nor punishment for your forgettable behavior. that’s my okay boy, keep doing whatever …

[shocotate]

I broke a ramune bottle to get the marble out for my dragon.

[wickedwonderlandd]

The dragons face never changes, but I still feel like he looks happier in the 2nd pic 🥺

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

The orb delights him

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[snowown]

[pupangelremade-deactivated20211]

[bestiarum]

[theawkwardqueerturtle]

this is the one meme that manages to age like a fine wine

[onlytiktoks]

[shinyhappygoth]

Time to FROLIC!

[bobomcfoe-art]

Videos i like so much i painted them

[jewish-joy]

Last year, I befriended a Catholic seminarian. We've gotten to be pretty decent friends. Seeing as he was staying in town for the summer and I wasn't, I entrusted him with caring for my plant.

He did a wonderful job, but as he was returning my plant to my custody, he explained "I watered her every other day, I gave her new dirt, moved her into the sunshine, prayed the rosary-"

"What?"

He looked at me, confused. "Isn't she a plant you pray with?"

"No," I said slowly. "She's a prayer plant. That's the... colloquial name of the plant."

Upon seeing his stricken face, I realized something went wrong. Turns out, this entire time, he's been including my plant in on his prayers and leaving her near icons.

Listen, totally cool. My plant becoming Catholic is a great deal for her not dying over the summer. But now I must navigate this interfaith household. Keep me in your thoughts.

[velinxi]

My Dungeon Crawler Carl tribute art!

[Prints here]

[baatjr-deactivated20150830]

yes teenage girls can be dramatic and wild but honestly have u ever even seen what happens when u tell a grown man ‘no’