Hello! It's been a little while! (Had nothing to post so I'm not gonna force myself lol)
We're stepping out of Epic, Saint seiya or even pokemon here.
My boyfriend and I were thinking about the fact that most countries in Europe would vote France to get ridden off if they had the chance and we tried so hard to think...why? (We're French)
First thing that came in mind for boyfriend is the racism of government. And as much as I agree that it's crappy as hell, I told him that most of the time, I see people complaining that French people are rude, aggressive, impolite. And we just looked at each other, here is our explanation on why people think that when we actually aren't that bad:
-Say "Bonjour". You come into a shop, a Cafe, anything, you say hello to the one who'll help you eventually, even if just to cash out, it's basic politeness. You don't have to say hello to everyone on the street, but if you cross like one person in 5 minutes, saying hello doesn't hurt, especially for the middle aged or elderly, they actually appreciate it a lot. And say "Bonsoir" after 5 P.M, some of us can be really touchy about that in the way that if you say Bonjour at that hour, we'll say Bonsoir still.
-Something we feel like other countries don't have as much is Sarcasm and dark humour. Every day, all the time. It's a religion, an art of life, a lifestyle even. It's not rudeness, sometimes it's for fun, but tourists always perceive everything about sarcasm as rude so we just assume they don't have it that much. And for dark humour, many can find it disgusting or cruel, but in the society we live in, might as well make fun of the fact we want to shoot ourselves in the head!😄
-in the shops and restaurants, clients are not kings. (You saw what French did to kings back then) and you may perceive it as rude. But there will still always be someone to come help you. Just a "hello do you need anything?" But nothing more. We're not over friendly, but not because we don't want to be! Trust me, there's nothing more relieving than a nice and friendly client. But we French are extremely demanding when it's about customer service. If you don't tell us you need anything, it is unlikely that we read between lines or anything, because other clients are waiting, and if we don't tend to them as soon as possible, some of them are immediately going to complain. (Yes, we also have Karens, yes, they are just as bad as yours)
-unspoken rule about circulation (mainly on foot). Now, those I believe may be harder to catch, but when you're observant enough, you can easily notice. For example, on escalators, you stay on your RIGHT. we apply the same codes on walking than we do on the road with cars. Of course, people are going to shout or curse at you if you're in the middle or on the left, and they come in front. They're not supposed to move. YOU are in THEIR lane. And that goes for sidewalks, too.
-if you stop in the street to talk with someone? That's perfectly fine, we do it all the time. But PLEASE stay on the side and not in the middle of the street or sidewalk. And if you walk side by side when talking and you're about to cross path with someone, one of you goes behind the other (still on the right) until you can walk next to each other again. Like on escalators and such, each one have their lane and, when walking, if you're on the other lane, they will not stop and will bump into you because, once again, they're not supposed to move if they're in their right lane. And there might be comments about you not owning the sidewalks or "hey, you good, we not bothering?" In a bit of aggressive way because you are, in fact, bothering.
-Bikes on the road or on the bike lane when there are any (and many towns are adding them so keep an eye out), and same for skateboards. Roller-skates can be on sidewalks, but only if you're careful. Some French don't respect that and trust me, we curse at them too. No one gets special treatments. We only wish one thing, it's for them to fall off.
-We insult each other as a sign of affection! It's not that we don't like anyone, it's just that when you're really good friend with someone, we call each other out like "hey, my favourite slvt!", "what's up, you bitch??", "you good, dumbass?" And stuff like that. There's literally a humorist, who's opening line is "you good assholes??" And everyone's cheering him because we know it's not an insult. Also we insult moms a bit too easily. But it's all in the tone of voice we use, you can guess. It's what we call "second degré" (literally translated as Second degree). It's when what we say is not literal and is meant to be laughed out or more gentle than it seems to be. I could be telling my boyfriend "go eat your deads" when he's gently annoying me, but we laugh at it.
(Also, if we insult each other out of affection, I'm sure you can guess what it's like when we DON'T like someone)
-If you need help for informations or directions as a tourist, choose wisely who to ask! There will always be a kind soul to help, but if you stop someone who is in a hurry, they won't like it and will most likely tell you to leave them be rudely because they don't have the time to spare. In any other moment, that person could have helped. But don't stop people in a hurry. Choose someone who's walking slower or is looking at something. And as always, be polite (it's a big thing for us.)
-You see memes about it all over tik tok, I'm sure, about how we dress well to simply take out the trash, BUT IT'S TRUE! And that means you might get a few judgemental looks if you just get out in a random shirt and sweatpants. Fashion is a big thing. And if you want to know why, it's because you never freaking know who we might come across in the street. Hair is nice, clothes that show off the body, anything works. Even a dishevelled look can be hot if you do it right.
-Judging people is a national sports. For those who wonders why we always sit at the tables outside of a cafe: It's where we can see most people. It's not especially rude, it's just how we are. And we even do it between us. Plus, you may see us with a smile on our face, pointing at you and assume we're laughing at you because you don't hear what we say, but most of the time, if you're dressed properly enough, we approve your styles! We're not negative about everyone.
(Fun fact, thanks to that, we learned to see fashion potential in others lol, we can tell when you CAN do better, but it's in a nice way. Like, to us, it's "why wouldn't you want to be your best self and look your best if you can?")
In conclusion, if you take time to appreciate our lifestyle and culture and learn our ways, it's actually easy to befriend French people. And even if we, ourselves, sometimes are rude to our own country, we love being french and most of us love other countries and their people and culture.❤️
Thx to boyfriend for the help because I never would have been able to put all of this down without his help. It would have been much messier.
(No, I will not name boyfriend because he, in fact, likes to be known as the adhd boyfriend)
