i'm just a deer in the headlights of life

Melissa, 30s, oc trash. i like cute stuff and video games and i'm really good at napping.  i'm seven small deer in a trenchcoat.

[icantspellthings]

Top 3 things people love insisting they don't have despite it being impossible

Pronouns

An accent

Bias

[elexecution]

they need to invent the opposite of an nda called an fda where u have to tell everyone everything

[ilovedirt]

subpoena

[virtualgirladvance]

tumblr

[earhartsease]

alcohol

[beltsquid]

war thunder forums

[memeuplift]

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

cr: 百变花央

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I’m out here buying tshirts and pants like a chump while some people are just wearing the world’s best rectangles

[mysticorset]

Pre-manufacturing cultures will really be like, here is the most elegant and gorgeous outfit you can imagine, and it’s achieved entirely with rectangles, ropes, and pins.

Over and over again, across the world, in cultures that never even knew of each others’ existences. Just, rectangles, knots, and pins. And I love that for them.

[devilishdescent]

>the goblin leaps to attack!

>the goblin misses!

>the goblin has scraped his little knee!

>oh, his little knee!

>oh, his little knee!

[makesomenoise]

🌈

[reactionimagesdaily]

[fagstaynight]

some people on the internet have only been on here for five minutes

[cowboyspones]

i will never get over this one i’m afraid

[aropride]

if your animal is lying on the floor, furniture etc, it’s important to take a picture of them. then, if they move or shift in any way, it’s important to take another picture. with this technique, you can take many pictures of your animal

[yesornopolls]

Have you gone to your native country’s capital city? (At least one of them if your country has multiple)

Have you gone to your native country’s capital city? (At least one of them if your country has multiple)

Yes

No

Remaining time: 2 days 17 hours

[onefleshhalfend-deactivated2025]

girls who are one emotional day away from walking into the forest and never being seen again are in your area. for now.

[sentimentalslut]

what people dont get about divorces is the Whole Thing About Dogs

[sentimentalslut]

i have written custody plans for labrador retrievers more complex than i have for children. i went to four years of undergrad, three years of law school, and sat for the bar exam to write up custody exchange provisions for dogs with hyphonated last names

[sentimentalslut]

my clients are paying $295 an hour for me to go to court and litigate who makes veterinary decisions for Chuckles the Goldfish and theres literally nothing i can do to stop them

[sentimentalslut]

framing these tags and hanging them up in my office to remind me that it can always be worse

[pisces-core]

[packs-pngs]

[peachrunes]

[nat-20s]

Favorite thing about renaissance faires is that they have fuck all to to with the renaissance. This thang is not about historical anything this is about dressing up like a fairy and watching a joust

[bettalbimarginata]

#a samurai with a flintlock pistol sitting next to a guy dressed as a caveman drinking a styrofoam cup of dr pepper#and it fucks severely

[headspace-hotel]

It's not THE renaissance, it's A renaissance. Of what? Up to you

[catchymemes]

[targetedknowledge]

[belairbottom]

@muzizmu

[pleasantlygrimm]

good for him. this man had a vision and he made it happen. homie hiked into the desert, changed into his sluttiest armor and positioned himself just so in front of a blade of grass to hide his shlong.

I yearn to be able to live with this kind of whimsy.

[kuromisgh0st]

we should all be living with this level of dedication and whimsy !! 🗡️