[valtsv]

please let me come to your sleepover party i promise i won't levitate out of my sleeping bag or start crawling around on the ceiling at 3am this time

[final-boy]

Got this vid on my FYP and couldnt not share it here

[gsjsnsnqkkwnw]

[rcktpwr]

we’re killing our planet

[a-lizard-in-disguise]

hamg on i gotta find smthn

[a-lizard-in-disguise]

[batmanego]

she only wants me for my highly specialized beak

[vivienvalentino]

BRENDAN FRASER  Airheads, 1994

[twinsfawn]

[thebookworm0001]

[inneedofdonuts]

His energy is unmatched

[averagefairy]

when youre laying down and your pet walks across your internal organs and youre like OW FUCK and they dont even care they just keep standing on your spleen like its their job

[thadeeliv]

this is why i keep my skin closed at all times.

[averagefairy]

you….. you what 

[ampervadasz]

[wintermutaldeactivated5062024-d]

ok I’m officially obsessed with the home improvement subreddit

[wintermutaldeactivated5062024-d]

this is it. this is by far the most jarring thing I’ve ever seen on Reddit. I’ve run the gauntlet on many a gore/shock sub in my time but the freaks are truly out on this one. holy shit

[comradeyaoi]

im not even joking rn this fucking painting made me start uncontrollably sobbing. Do you know how long it took to paint? How expensive it was? The cat was content for hours and so loved that the girl held him there and paid for him to be painted with her. Imagine having such a bond… imagine being so loved and loving so much back…

[comradeyaoi]

Apparently this is almost a genre of painting. Its human nature to love and cradle cats …. And the bond these cats and their people have. To sit together for hours to get a painting to attempt to immortalize the love you two shared

[kinesthetiachomoromanticore-dea]

i’m really bored with my first name 

[75orchids]

your name is now crab78

[kinesthetiachomoromanticore-dea]

[utopians]

stepped on a plum (overripe plum) (barefoot) it was on the driveway got out of the car and accidentally (didn't know it was there) stepped on the plum (warm) (on the ground) (it had fallen from the tree) barefoot (no shoes) wearing long pants (too long) (need to hem them) plum viscera got on them (the pants) unexpected plum on the driveway (hot plum) (97 degrees out) already super hungover (throwing up all morning) (should not have been driving at all) and I stepped out of the car (black car) (97 degrees out) and onto the plum (unexpected) (didn't know the plum was there) and it burst (plum nightmare on my only good pair of sweatpants) still we find ways to keep ourselves going from day to day

[utopians]

Forms a closer psychic + spiritual bond with the car

[homemeansthehills]

Honestly it's not as bad as it sounds. It takes the eagles about 2 hours to get to my liver and another 2 to eat it. The whole ordeal is over by one and I've got the afternoon to myself.

[unclefather]

making funny posts is just a symptom of a greater problem

[evilscientist3]

Experts have weighed in

[aflo]

*opens the oven after preheating to 400*

[trickstertime]

This is Margaret when she opens that email

[brothersskeleton]

[yourplayersaidwhat]

I'm a Straight White Man every day of my life, on Wednesday Nights I just wanna be a lesbian!

~my friend on his Druid character who is searching for her wife

[spaceexploreunit]

Funny story about that actually, she’s figured out that she IS a lesbian 7 days a week

[catgirlforeskin]

We got another one girls